Time crawls

Inching forward

every second seems

like an hour

trying to overcome these horrors

as I climb over an overbearing wall

of friendship, family,

and the aching temptation, desire.

The next morning, the shrill voices of my brothers pry me away from a peaceful sleep. I pull the pillow over my head, covering my ears, trying to block out their obnoxiousness. At first, my thoughts are jumbled as I try to remember why in the hell they would be up this early in the morning. Then I realize that it's the first day back to school, my eyes widening. I sigh and close my eyes again, wishing the day away.

"Emma Jean! Wake up!" My mom shouts outside my bedroom, waking me up just as I start to drift asleep again. She pounds her fist against the door one more time before moving on to the next, not leaving time for me to respond.

In the next few minutes, I manage to wrestle the blankets off and dress for the day into a pair of black jean shorts and a dark purple t-shirt. Peering out my bedroom door, I listen for the tap running in the bathroom. It is. I should have taken a shower last night, because I won't get a chance this morning with all the boys getting ready for school too.

On my way out of my bedroom, I glance into the full length mirror on the back of the door, checking myself out. When I see my hair, my eyes widen and I grab my brush from my dresser and brushed it out. My hair is being aggravating, so I decide to put it in a ponytail. When I'm satisfied, I slip on my grey flip flops and head downstairs with my backpack slung over my right shoulder.

Downstairs is a disaster.

Mom is trying to clean Joey's face but he keeps squirming around and just as Dad sits down at the table, he gets loose from my mom and runs. He bumps into the table as Dad takes a sip of his coffee, spilling the coffee all over dads shirt. Dad curses and she lets out a frustrated sigh.

"I guess now would be a bad time to say good morning?" I question as I finish walking into the kitchen, smirking at the scene. Dad stands glaring at Joey, who gives an uneasy smile and runs up the stairs faster than the speed of light. Mom bursts our laughing and shakes her head.

"Good morning sweetie," she says as she pecks me on the cheek. Then she turns around and sprints towards the stairs, calling for Joey. Just as she reaches the bottom step, she turns around and faces me.

A look of sadness passes over her and my heart hurts.

"Honey, don't forget about the basketball game tonight, okay?" she asks. "I know you said you didn't want to go, but its to honor your brother. I think it will be good for us."

She's talking about the honorary game tonight that the school is hosting. The senior boys basketball team, the team that Aidan, Ben, and Austin play on, is playing against their rivals to honor Tyler.

I forgot about it.

Nodding my head slowly, I try think of a way to get out of it. "Yeah, okay," I say, watching as my Mom sprints up the stairs. Aiden walks down, skipping the last three and Ben follows him. In the kitchen, Dad sits back down at the table, wiping his shirt off but I can still see the stain.

"I didn't like this shirt anyway," he says, giving me a small smile.

"Morning little sister. Dad...loving your new style," Ben says, chuckling when he sees Dad wiping his shirt. Dad glares at Ben as he opens the fridge and drinks the milk from the carton.

"That's disgusting!" I yell, causing Ben to jump but keeps drinking anyway. Dad heads upstairs, probably to change his shirt. Owen, my third oldest brother, nineteen, walks down the stairs, grumbling.

Quinn follows next.

Owen and Quinn have similar physical features, almost like twins, except that there is a five year age gap between the two. Aidan and Ben are the only twins in the family. Both have dark brown hair and green eyes and their faces are the same oval shape.

"Here, give me some of that," Quinn says. He grabs a glass from the cupboard, snatching the milk from Aidan. Quinn isn't always a pig, I admit. Quinn pours the glass full of milk and then hands it to me, smiling. I take the glass and Quinn tips the jug up and gulps it down.

I spoke too soon. I curl my nose up, and dump the glass of milk in the sink as the rest of my brothers laugh. I shot them the evil eye, and they start coughing simultaneously to cover their laughs.

"Can we just go already?" I grab my backpack and leave the house, wanting to get the day over with. Aidan and Ben's birthday was just a few months ago, and our parents agreed to get them a beater, a red 2001 Honda, that looks like it has been through a war and back. They can drive to school with it as long as they drive Quinn and I to school everyday.

Aidan gets in the drivers side and Ben the passengers, forcing Quinn to sit with me in the back. I stuff my earbuds into my ears and turn the volume up so I don't hear my brothers fight over a music station. They finally pick one before backing out our drive way and head to St. Albert's high school.

St. Albert's isn't a massive school, about 750 kids in total, though everyone knows everyone because its a small town. There is basketball, soccer, track and field, and volleyball and numerous student clubs like Photography, Year book, and Art Club, among others. My brothers are on the basketball team. I'm not athletic, although I like to run, I'm a klutz and would break my leg.

I'm seventeen, going into eleventh grade, a year behind Aidan and Ben. Going to the same school as my brothers has both pros and cons. Pros would be the cliches, older brother; protection, which can also be a con too. The teachers know who I am, and sometimes they tend not to like me based on my brother's past behaviour in their class.

When Aidan pulls into the school's parking lot, cars are already starting to pile into the good parking spaces. The four of us get out of the car and Ben puts his arm around my shoulder.

"If anyone gives you trouble, give us a call. We'll take care of them," Ben says and smashes his fist into the palm of his hand as he shoots a threatening glare at a couple guys walking by. Ben is usually the calm, kinder brother while Aidan tends to be the more physically violent brother who will stand up for me.

I laugh. "Calm down there, Hulk. I can handle it," I say, patting his arm and shrug him off as I spot Andrea. I wave to Aidan and Ben and sprint across the parking lot and realize Quinn has already disappeared into the crowd of students. I head towards the school and see Andrea who is waving frantically at the top of the main entrance.

"Could you be anymore embarrassing?"I ask while laughing, and Andrea starts up the stairs into the school. There two sets of stairs, one leading downstairs to the gymnasium and junior classrooms which is from grades seven to nine, and upstairs to the main offices and senior classrooms which is from grades ten to twelve.

"You love me anyway," Andrea says and grabs my arm, pulling me up the stairs. People greet us when we walk by. Andrea finally comes to a stop outside a classroom. The name on the door that scrawls out Mr. Newt on a piece of paper taped to the door.

I groan at the sight, exasperated. "Andrea...maybe you should see a therapist if you're," I stop, laughing.

Andrea punches me in the shoulder and glares.

"Ouch! I was kidding," I mutter, rubbing my shoulder. Andrea put her finger to her lips and motioned for me to be quiet.

We peer Inside the classroom and my eyes widen at what I see. It is Mr. Newt and Ms. Kinney, kissing. I pull back, leaning against the outside wall of the classroom trying to hide my laughter.

Andrea's face is turning red from holding it in, and her cheeks are so puffed out it looks like she is about to burst. I quickly pull out my phone and snap a picture. I grin to myself.

Andrea finally breathes, then glares at me properly without looking like a fish about to explode. She grabs my arm and we run down the hall. When we stop, the two of us burst out laughing.

"I don't get it, what does she have that I don't?" Andrea pouts, and I sigh hoping the bell will soon ring for homeroom so I can leave this maniac.

"I don't know? A life?"

Andrea scoffs. "That was mean."

"I live with the hell hounds...what do you expect?"

She laughs, then quiets, her face turning into a frown. "So, are you coming tonight?" she asks, and I know she's referring to the game. We begin to walk down the hall towards our homeroom. My eyes are straight forward.

Why does everyone have to bring up this discussion today?

I shrug. "I don't know," I say, hoping my parents won't force me to go. "Everyone will be staring at us."

Andrea sighs. "No, they won't. Everyone will be staring at the boys, and cheering. You won't be alone, I'll be there and my parents too." She smirks. "Austin will be there too," she says, winking.

I roll my eyes. "Of course he will be, he's on the team," I say in a deadpan tone.

She face palms, slapping herself in the forehead. "You're hopeless," she says, giving me a shove. The bell rings and we both join the herd of students trying to make it to their class before the tardy bell rings.

When the bell rings for lunch, to say I'm happy to get out of my French class would be an understatement. I'm elated. Mrs. Grue, the french teacher is quite boring as she recites french texts to us in a dull tone. And there is no one in the class that I'm friends with, so that made it hard.

I gather my bag and books, heading for the door. Outside, students rush around to get to the cafeteria or outside to their cars. Seniors have the privilege of going off campus for lunch, meaning they can go to a restaurant or home to eat.

As I walk down the hall to find my best friend, I'm a little sad. This would have been Tyler's first day of high school too, and his second year on the basketball team. Its so different without him.

Just as I'm turning the corner, something knocks me down to the ground and lands on top of me.

This feels very familiar. A deja-vu moment.

"We have to stop meeting like this. It's becoming a habit," Austin says, sitting up so I can see his face. He is laying on top of me, smirking with his eyes full of amusement. I roll my eyes and think about how close his lips are to mine.

I shake my self mentally.

Snap out of it, Emma.

"Do you mind getting off of me? You are a little heavy," I say, breathing heavy. Austin nods, and hoists himself up off me then helps me back on my feet. A few people still lingering in the halls walked around us, watching us carefully.

"Where are you headed?"

"To the cafeteria," I say, and arch an eyebrow. "Why aren't you at the Diner?" I ask.

He shrugs. Usually seniors head to the Diner to eat their lunch. Austin walks beside me, following me to the cafeteria.

"Ben has detention with Ms. Sander's. You know that Aidan doesn't go anywhere without him, and who else do I hang out with, other than Carter and Henry?"

"So, you're a bunch of girls? You can't anywhere without one another?" I ask, laughing.

Austin narrows his eyes and I smile sweetly.

"I am not a girl...though I can't say the same about the others. Have you ever seen Carter watch a horror film? He screams like a girl," Austin says, throwing his hands up in the air.

I laugh, knowing what Austin is saying is true. Carter plays on the basketball team with my brother, and has stayed over countless times.

"He woke me up screaming once. I though there was a murderer in the house or something."

Austin laughs as we enter the cafeteria. Its huge, and people are sitting at different tables with their friends. There is a window in the wall where lunch is served.

"Over there," he says, pointing to a table in the corner of the cafeteria where I see Andrea's bright red hair. Next to her is Seth and Henry, along with Aidan and a few other seniors beside them.

Austin and I walk toward them, and Aidan yells over the noise when he sees Austin.

"Austin, my main man! And Emma, my dear little sister!" Austin and I roll our eyes at each other, but we are not surprised. Aidan has always been the resident loud mouth and tends to be more annoying than not.

Andrea waves and pats the empty spot next to her for me to sit down. Seth and Carter are across from us, trying to see how many french fries they can stuff in their mouth at the same time. It is disgusting.

Seth smiles. "Hey Emma, long time no see."

I chuckle. "How was your summer?"

"Great! Eighteen home runs!"

I know Seth from when we started T-ball together when we were only three. Eventually we were old enough to play baseball and since it was a non-school club, we were on the same team. Seth is like my guy best friend and is hot too but also gay. Which is too bad.

Carter on the other hand is a total ladies man, but I have no interest in him.

"You guys are gross. Hey look...there's Addison, Carter. Oh look, she's coming this way," Andrea says with a smirk, staring down a tall girl walking by with a lunch tray. Addison is a girl Carter has liked since seventh grade, and I think that she would settle Carter down...if she would just give him a chance.

Carter's eyes widen as he catches Addison walking by and he starts spitting out fries and waves to her. He has a goofy grin on his face that turns to a pout when Addison walks by, rolling her eyes at Carter. The guys at the table laugh, giving Carter sympathetic pats on the back.

"She is impossible!" Carter throws up his hands exasperated. Andrea and I look at each other and scoff. Carter narrows his eyes. "What?"

"Maybe you should act more like a gentleman. I mean, no offence, but who wants to date a guy who acts like a five year old?" Andrea says, shrugging.

Carter scoffs and was about to argue, but I cut him off.

"Even my little brother Joey has more sense about girls. And he has manners," I say, chuckling.

The table laughs.

"She's right man. Joey can sure make the girls swoon in his class," Aidan says and the table laughs again. Carter sighs, as if silently admitting he could act more mature.

"So what should I do?"

"Give chocolate. A girl loves her chocolate," Andrea says and I agree with her.

"Give her flowers. And write a poem about how you feel about her," I tell Carter, and he raises his eyebrows.

"A poem?" He asks.

I nod. Carter stops to think for a minute. "Okay, how about this."

Carter begins to recite a poem:

"Roses are red,

violets are blue,

I dig you,

now lets screw."

"You're impossible!" I shout, but end up laughing with everyone else.

Chemistry is my last class, with Ms. Kinney, but all I can think about is this morning. I shudder as I walk past her. I sit at the back of the class, by a window. There is no one in this class I know either so the desk next to me is empty.

"Alright class, today we will be doing an easy quiz to see how many formulas you know," Ms. Kinney says, with a bundle of papers in her hand.

The class breaks into a groan and Ms. Kinney laughs but is cut off by a knock at the door. Ms. Kinney sighs and opens the door.

"It's nice of you to join us, Mr. Moore. Please take a seat."

Austin comes into the classroom, looking around to see an empty seat. He grins when he sees me and walks back to the desk beside me.

"Late on your first day?" I ask as Austin sits down next to me, and the teacher keeps going over the course curriculum and outcomes. Ms. Kinney passes out a paper that has multiple questions and eyes Austin.

"I won't tolerate cell phones in my class nor poor excuses about being late. This is an academic course, so I expect everyone in this class to have high expectations for them self and make an effort in their work."

"This sucks," I say in a whisper to Austin while I try to work on the sheet. Austin leans closer.

"What sucks?" he whispers back.

"I hate chemistry," I mutter, groaning. "The only reason I took it was because the guidance counselor said I needed it. I failed the chemistry section in basic science."

"That does suck," he says, chuckling.

He flips his paper over. I stare at him in astonishment.

"Are you finished?" I ask.

He nods and smirks, looking at my paper.

"You haven't even started!"

"I know."

"So, how was your first day?"

"Tiring, lunch was my favourite part though."

"Mine too," I say, smiling. Ms. Kinney scolds us for talking and threatened to give us detention. Austin and I stop talking but he slid over his work and let me copy it. Out of the corner of my eye, I keep glancing over to look over at Austin, and I can't help but notice that he's doing the same.

"It was so...so...so awesome!" Joey shouts, throwing his hands up in amazement as he tells stories from his first day of school. My parents, and the entire brood of brothers sit at the table. Its Daniels last few hours with us before he has a flight to catch.

Daniel is studying to become a lawyer, the first one in the family.

"Did you meet any new friends?" I ask, and Joey grin.

"I did, Jacob, Riley, and Bella!" Joey shouts, wide eyed.

"A girl? I thought you said girls have cooties?" Logan asks, teasing Joey as his face reddened.

"Nope," Joey says, grinning, popping the P then turns serious. "Cooties are pre-school troubles, bro. I'm in first grade! And anyways Bella is awesome, she even loves Batman as much as me!"

It is true, Joey loves Batman. Joey and Bella are really going to hit it off.

"How was your day, Em?" My mom asks and I shrug.

"Fine," I say. It was more than fine though, especially when I start to think about Austin. Talking to him today had been awesome and his laugh, wait, shit, what the hell am I thinking? No. I can't let myself think like that, I won't let myself think about that.