When the human body doesn't sleep for three days, it deteriorates very, very quickly: from slurred speech and slow thinking, to 'micro sleeps' and feeling disorientated, to hallucinations and paranoia.

As Jack watched all but one of the lights in your house flick off, he wondered if he could put his exhausted body through two more nights of this. He hoped he could.

Since you answered his call, Jack had spent every night sat by the same, ancient field maple, eyes taking note of every little detail. Each time a light flicked on or off, he took note of the time. Each time you left the house, he hid behind the bark of the tree, hoping that the motion light attached to the wall wouldn't reach his hastily hidden bike.

It had become a new routine for him. He got to your house by nine, and left five and a half hours later, once he was sure that you were asleep. He would wait a bit longer if you stayed up—who knew what would happen if he left you alone while you were awake? Leaving you alone was something Jack wasn't prepared to do, and even when he did leave once you were in bed, he was always happy to stay for just another moment. Just another moment to watch you before he left. Just another moment to adjust the quilt so it was tucked under your arms. It made the dull ache in his chest that bit more bearable.

That night, you went to bed earlier then usual. Jack gave it fifteen minutes after your goodnight text before he slithered through an unlocked window, tiptoeing down the hall, up the stairs and finally arriving at your bedroom. He paused slightly before he pushed the door open, sticking his head through the gap.

It was easy for him to figure out if you were asleep or not. You fidgeted less in your sleep, and while Jack peered around the wooden frame, you didn't move for three whole minutes, your breathing steady and deep. A smile appeared on his face.

'See you later,' he whispered, shutting the door as gently as he could, the fondness in his eyes never fading. The door opened again and he zipped to your side, quickly pressing the ghost of a kiss on your temple.

If he knew what was waiting for him back home, he would have stayed a little while longer.

As expected, there was little to no traffic on the way home, meaning Jack could glide along the roads that led him back to Greg's place, his mind wandering far away from his body towards no particular destination. It went down the trail of memories, the path of hopes for the future, and the cul-de-sac of dreams. No matter how far it went, it always returned to the same place: you. It returned to the same, heartwarming comfort that filled his nerves every time you were close to him, or whenever you spoke, or sent a text—

Why is there a light on?

There was never normally a light on when Jack returned from his nightly excursions, and seeing something so out of place caused him to startle on his bike, coming to an abrupt halt as he stared up at the pale yellow glow that illuminated his room.

His heart twisted and flipped around his mouth and intestines, only growing in urgency as he crept around the back and going into the utility room. (Before he started his new routine, he had made sure to work out the quietest way in and out of the house. Thankfully for him, it was simply out the back door.)

The kitchen light flicked on like a spotlight in an auditorium as a voice asked: 'Been out?'

'Couldn't sleep.' Jack internally cursed and chided himself for letting his guard slip enough to gain Greg's attention. 'Sorry if I woke you up.'

'No, it's fine,' Greg replied. 'Was (Y/N) alright?'

'They were when I messaged earlier.'

'What about when you were sat outside their house? Were they alright then?'

Jack's eyes widened. 'What do you mean?' Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.

'You know exactly what I mean, dude.' Greg got to his feet, arms crossed, brows furrowed like the parent of a teenager who had caught them returning from a party they were forbidden from attending. 'After your sleepwalking episode, I thought you were just scared to sleep or something, but people who're scared to sleep don't leave and come back at the same time before crashing for a couple of hours and pretending they slept fine. Oh, and we shared phone locations, remember? Because your parents wanted me to make sure you didn't fucking vanish again?'

If Jack's face hadn't sold him out before, it definitely did after that bombshell. He had been so focused on making sure that you were alright that he completely forgot about his parents' request. The location app was hidden away in a folder somewhere on his phone, and he wasn't that bothered about his parents' requests anyway. They hadn't been to see him since he had returned from being a missing person, and they barely messaged, so why should Jack, an adult, be bothered?

'Go on then—tell me why you've spent nearly the past two weeks outside of (Y/N)'s house?'

'I've been keeping them safe,' Jack said sharply. 'Nothing more, nothing less. They were jumpy when the doorbell rang a while back, and keeping them safe is the best thing for me to do.'

Greg pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing deeply before saying, 'You couldn't just...talk to them? You know, like a normal person?'

'I have my ways and I would like to stick to them.'

'Is that weird cupboard part of your "ways" too?'

Hey, don't be mean. 'That's none of your fucking business.'

'None of my business?' Greg echoed. 'None of my business? I think it's some of my fucking business when the things you're doing could get you arrested! You're meant to be a law-abiding citizen, remember? You can't just go around doing whatever you want anymore.'

'I won't get arrested; you're worrying too much. I won't get caught, and (Y/N) won't find out.'

'Bold of you to assume you're sneaky enough to get away with this. If you get done, it's gonna be me who helps you out. If (Y/N) files for a restraining order—which they can definitely do—it's gonna be me who sticks with you.'

'No one asked you to do all this.,' Jack snapped, his gaze turning to a fierce glare. 'The only people who did were my parents, and they have no say in anything after what they did. You don't have to do any of this. I'm grateful for the things you've done, but what I do regarding (Y/N) is my can of worms that I'm going to lie in whether you like it or not.'

That seemed to rile Greg up even more. 'So you're just going to risk everything for someone who doesn't remember you and may not feel the same way? As amazing as (Y/N) is, you can't just throw everything away for one person!'

Jack's fists clenched, the skin over his knuckles twinging. He couldn't hit Greg; he just couldn't. It wasn't his fault that he didn't know the whole story, and after how he reacted, Jack wasn't sure if he wanted to tell his friend the whole story. He treasured Greg's friendship (truly he did), and he didn't want to throw it away, but if he was going to prevent Jack from spending time with you, then something would have to be done. He wasn't going to stand for it—he already had one obstacle, he didn't need another.

'I'm not throwing everything away,' Jack said through gritted teeth. 'I know what I'm doing, alright? Just...let me do what I have to do. I'm off to bed. See you in the morning.' Before Greg could respond, he was already climbing up the stairs, not turning back to look in case it furthered their little argument.

He knew that you would probably never speak to him again if you found out about the things he had done in order to cope with his feelings towards you. He was aware that the majority of his actions were frowned upon and deemed to be illegal, just as Greg had pointed out, but he wasn't hurting anyone. He hadn't kidnapped, tortured, or murdered people close to you, so it wasn't that bad, right?

He collapsed on his bed, eyes staring blankly at the wall ahead. He wanted things to become normal. He wanted to stop sneaking around behind your back and be able to be honest about his emotions.

It's not fair.

Pulling a pillow to his chest, he hugged it close and closed his eyes. He couldn't wait for the day you told him that you had ended things with your partner. He couldn't wait for the day when he would be able to smother you in all the affection you deserved and more.

The waiting was becoming unbearable. Could he wait a few more months if you decided to give your current relationship another chance? Probably not. He wasn't sure if he could wait a few more weeks, and if it did go on for longer then that, he would have to intervene. He didn't want to, but you wouldn't be leaving him with any choice. He could sow some seeds at the party.

That's right; the party was in two days. He had his suit ready, and he knew what time he was meant to be there. Maybe he could give you some nudges in the right direction while he was there. It wouldn't do any harm, surely. It was you, him, and your ignorant coworkers that would hopefully view him as the kind-hearted best friend who did what he could to support you.

He couldn't wait.

before i started writing this chapter three days ago, i was seriously thinking of quitting writing altogether. it was just one of those days, i guess.

im not, though. i had a cry over a song from zombie land saga and that made it all better.

song in question (maybe spoilers for s1 ep12):

the anime as a whole has really helped me get through some bad episodes. go give the creator some love.

- k.

(p.s im a kotaro simp)