Blair and I had been switching spots for two weeks. It was going surprisingly well. Well, better than my efforts as myself had been with Carter. But for once, I wanted to go as myself to school. That was why I was walking to my table as myself, feeling relieved that I didn't have to talk to Erin. After she had bashed my clique, I didn't like talking to her.

Going to sit at my table that was already filled with my friends, I shot them all smiles. That seemed to catch them off guard, which left me confused because I always welcomed them with smiles. I was known by everyone for my smiles.

"Whoa, you're different," Tori commented once I was settled down at the table. "Well, you're back to the old you, I mean."

I tried to look confused, but it was hard to when I found myself thinking about Blair and how hard it must be for her to act like me. I was bubbly and open, and she was reserved and closed off. I owed her the world for switching places with me.

"Oh, I was just tired," I lied, knowing that was the best excuse for not being bubbly. "I'm fine now."

"That's good," Tori said, sighing. "I really prefer the chatty you rather than the quiet one. The quiet you is so boring."

Forcing a smile, I tried not to let her words bother me. Thinking of Blair, I found myself wanting to defend her. I wanted to tell Tori that being quiet didn't mean you were boring. But knowing that would blow my cover, I just smiled wider.

"Why were you so tired?" Jake suddenly asked, bringing my attention to him.

I opened to my mouth to say it was because of school, but I knew I would be fooling no one. Although I did work hard to do decently in school, I would never sacrifice sleep for schoolwork. Due to that, I had to come up with an excuse quickly.

"I guess I was overthinking the whole Carter situation and it was stressing me out," I said, ignoring the way Tori groaned. "But I'm not anymore."

"What changed?" Maya asked.

I didn't answer immediately and I analyzed my friends for a moment. Tori looked annoyed, Ryder was studying me, Jake looked bored, and Maya seemed curious. No one seemed to genuinely care and in that moment, I realized they all didn't care about my feelings for Carter. In fact, they seemed tired of my feelings. That was why, I decided to stop expressing my feelings around them.

"I'm over Carter," I lied, forcing a smile. "Finally I stopped thinking about him."

"Really?" Tori asked excitedly, leaving me feeling uneasy. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Finally!" Tori exclaimed. "Holy shit finally!"

A few people glanced at us and I stared at Tori, wondering why she was acting like that. It hurt, to be honest. I felt annoying as I realized just how sick Tori was of my feelings.

"Yes!" Jake then exclaimed, grinning. "Finally I have a shot at you."

"Ugh, shut up Jake," Tori said, rolling her eyes. "Claire would never go for a guy like you."

"You're so jealous." Jake smirked, looking amused. "Why don't stop letting your ego get in your way and ask me out."

"What the hell." Tori's jaw dropped. "I would never ask you out."

Jake and Tori proceeded to argue, which left the rest of us to watch them. I was thankful for the change of topic because after Tori's reaction, I felt down. The fact that it hurt me caught me off guard because usually, I never took Tori's words or actions seriously. But for once, I did.

"Hey," Ryder said, bringing my attention to him. "Are... Are you okay?"

I stared at Ryder for a moment and saw that he was genuinely concerned. Noticing that, I realized I shouldn't have grouped him in with the rest of my friends who didn't seem to care about me. Ryder did care about me, genuinely, which left me being honest.

"I'm... Alright. Could be better," I said, shrugging. "But I guess I will be alright. I think things are going to get better from now on."

Thinking about my progress with Carter, I had a good feeling my words were true. Carter and I seemed to be getting closer, slowly but surely, and I was looking forward to my future with him. With only eight months left of school, I was ready to achieve my goal.

"I'm glad to hear that," Ryder said, ruffling my hair. "Don't let anyone, especially some guy who doesn't know what he's missing out on, get you down."

I found my heart feeling warm at his words. Smiling at him, I watched as he smiled back at me. We stared at each other for a moment, our eyes expressing how thankful we were for the other. As my eyes stayed on Ryder, I couldn't help but notice he was glancing at my lips.

"Guys, I have some news," Tori said, bringing the both of our eyes to her.

"What is it?" Maya asked, curious.

"I'm going to host a party," Tori answered. "It's our last year and there hasn't been any good parties yet, so I decided to just hold one myself. It'll be in a week."

"Yes!" Jake exclaimed, grinning. "That would be awesome! Finally you do something useful!"

Tori narrowed her eyes at Jake who simply winked at her. She scoffed and I found myself growing excited at her news. After how hectic things had been, a party sounded nice. I hadn't let loose in a while, so it was perfect.

"Sounds great," I said honestly. "I'm excited."

"I am too," Tori said, grinning. "We'll have a blast and I will go down in history as the person who can throw one hell of a party."

We all laughed at that and suddenly, we were going back to our old ways. All five of us talked about random, useless things and we laughed so loudly that all eyes were on us. It was weirdly nice and I realized then that I missed my clique. Even if they were flawed, they were fun to be around.