[The following scene is not mentioned in the manhwa.]

"You'll be gone in three days. Are you ready?"

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"Is that so?"

"..."

"When I look at you Sir Allendis, somehow I remember the youth I was."

I haven't visited my lady since we saw the town festival together. Tia didn't come to see me either.

"I miss her," said the Emperor, who looked at me with a longing expression.

"It was my first time feeling that way. I thought I could throw away the Emperor's seat and all I cared about in order to get her."

"Did you?"

"No, I let her go."

"Why... are you not supposed to be the one who's got everything?"

"There was another man who threw everything away for her and loved her. She loved him, too. I thought I'd take her away, but I let her go." His Majesty said with a wry smile.

I looked silently at the King, as if I was seeing him for the first time. I had never met him alone except for the day when I arranged a secret meeting with him. I could see why my cold-hearted father, the Duke of Ras, and the blunt Duke of Monique were loyal to him. How many rulers could have such a deep understanding of the inner thoughts of their officials ?

"Sir Allendis."

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"Don't be rash. Listen. The love that had burnt me, and the pain of letting her go... they both dulled over time. I thought I'd die if I didn't get her love, but I've managed to survive."

"..."

"As time goes by, you'll have a day when you can move forward. I don't want to lose a man like you because of this. Do you understand?"

"...Your Majesty."

"You can blame my selfishness. I knew what you were feeling as I watched you deal with this. You are a necessary talent for the Empire. So be sure to come back when you're done with my punishment for you. If not right away, won't you make an agreement with me that you'll come back someday?"

Did Your Majesty already know?

The blue eyes looking at me somehow choked me. Who had ever cared that much about me except my lady ?

Had I met His Majesty sooner, my life would have been different.

His Majesty, who had long looked at me hesitate, sighed and said,

"Go away."

I was so sorry. I couldn't agree to his offer because I had already given up my whole body and mind to Tia.

***

[The following scene is not mentioned in the manhwa.]

"...Allen."

Two days before the mission's departure, I was unexpectedly visited by Tia.

I thought I'd never see you again. Did you come to see me for the last time, my lady?

Please don't be sad when I'm away, Tia. You look cold on the outside, but you're soft on the inside. I'm sure you've been very sad since I confessed my feelings the other day. You must have been in a lot of pain. But don't do that anymore. It's more painful for me to see you in pain. You don't have to grieve for me who will betray your faith.

"I heard you're leaving for the mission."

"Yes."

I tried to laugh casually, but I didn't think I controlled my face properly when I saw the golden eyes swaying uneasily. Anyway, that wasn't the first time I was lying to you, so it didn't matter.

"Tia. Don't get sick without me."

"..."

"Even though you've improved a lot lately, you never were very healthy. Don't starve because you're stressed out. If you fall down, your whole house will turn upside down."

"...Allen."

Tia's expression subsided. But I went on and on. I still had a mountain of stories to tell.

"Be especially careful not to catch a cold on a rainy day. You're a Knight now, so you'll just get soaked in the rain."

"Allen. "

"When winter comes put on warm clothes, ok ?"

"Allen!"

Her golden eyes were filled with tears.

"Come on, Allen, you're only going away for a mission, but you act like a man who won't come back. You'll be back when the mission's over, right? Huh? Allen."

"...Tia."

"Yes."

"If I were to ask you to accept my feelings now... would you accept them?"

I smiled bitterly at her silence, and turned away in agony as I saw her guilty face. I was packing a small medicine bottle in my luggage when I heard her thin voice.

"I won't apologise anymore."

"..."

"But Allen, just let me tell you this. Even if I don't feel the same way as you, I still think that you and my father are the most precious person to me."

[In the manhwa, Tia doesn't say this to Allen's face, but she thinks it as she cries on her father's lap in chapter 102.]

"...Tia."

Then Tia gives Allen a small green box with a green ribbon on it.

When Allendis opens it, it's full of colored ribbons.

"It's..."

"I was wondering if there was anything I could give you before you go on your journey. You always tie your hair, so I thought you might need some ribbons."

I unconsciously reached out to her. The moment I tried to pull her little soft body into my arms, sharp reason stopped me.

You can't get any closer. If you do this, you'll both have a harder time parting.

Allen quickly withdraw his hands.

And he looks more closely at the ribbon he has in his hand, and it's the ribbon he had given to Tia, the one he wanted to kill her with. She has embroidered his name on it. A sudden burst of emotion hits him and he chokes.

He wants to tell Tia the truth, about everything ; the darkness and the madness that are boiling inside him, the deathly coalition that is after her, the days when he tried to destroy her after he joined the traitors. And even the day he tried to kill her. Because Tia has the right to know the truth. Allen is afraid she would look at him in horror, but he thinks he should tell her the truth.

But the words don't come out. Everything is stuck at the tip of his tongue, and he swallows it. He can't bring himself to be hated by Tia who still looks at him with so much trust.

He wants to remain warm and friendly to her, even if everyone else will remember him as madman and a traitor.

Please forgive me Tia. Forgive me for deceiving you to the end because of my selfishness.

***

[This following scene is not mentioned in the manhwa.]

On the day of Allen's departure, Carsein comes to see Allen off and they started their usual bickering.

"I heard you were following the delegation. I also heard you sent your resignation" says Carsein.

"Yes."

Then Allendis throws his sword at Carsein, who gets a fright but manages to snatch it.

"What is it, Weed? Are you asking for a duel?!" shouts Carsein.

"Take it."

"What?"

"I don't think I'll need it anymore."

"You son of a b*tch..."

With a distorted look on his face, Carsein strides and grabs Allen by the collar.

"Let go of me, while I'm being nice."

"Weed... if you're not coming back because you've been rejected, I'll kill you."

"You're still as stupid as before, Carrot. If I give up on my life, how can you kill me ? A man can only die once."

"Shut up, even if you're a crazy f*cker, I've acknowledged you as my rival. If you give up like this, I will never forgive you. Do you understand? Come back so that we can compete fair and square."

Carsein's blue eyes are blazing. Allen pulls himself out of Carsein's grip. Then he fixes his crumpled clothes and turns away.

"Be careful. She looks tough on the outside, but she has a soft heart" says Allen.

Goodbye, Carrot. I thought I had nothing but annoyance for you, but now I think it was a bit of pleasure. Take good care of Tia for me. Don't cry like me, please cherish her. Our tender-hearted, silver lady.

***

[This following scene is not mentioned in the manhwa.]

"I've given you a lot of trouble, Sir Verita."

"Never mind, Lord Ras. I hope you return safely."

"Are you sure you're not going back with us, Sir Verita?"

"Yes, my lord. I'm going to look at the world a little bit more. If anyone asks about me, please tell let them know."

The kingdom of Lua had a very different air and sceneries from the Empire, and unfamiliar surroundings. There I worked as hard as I could. It wasn't very intense because I was in charge of negotiations between allies. It was mostly about gathering information to make greater gains in a friendly atmosphere. I enjoyed working for the first time. Not to get a title, not to destroy or plot against someone, but to contribute to something great using my abilities.

I watched as the Princess and Lord Ras nurtured their love day after day, and when they got married.

And finally the day came when we had to return to the Empire. Since I had decided I would never go back when I left the Empire, I flatly refused their offer to return together.

I said goodbye and when everyone had left I climbed up a mountain and stood on a cliff. The empire's territory was dimly visible in the distance. Somewhere over there, my little girl was alive and breathing.

How are you, Tia? I miss you, my dear girl.

I searched through the piles of luggage I had brought away from the Empire. I saw a small medicine bottle hidden in the corner. The drug made people forget everything and allowed them to be happy if they drank it. But I dared not take it because I feared it would be a nuisance to the mission. I threw the bottle down the cliff. I won't need it anymore. Just a few steps forward and everything would be over. [So Allen is about to commit suicide, just like in the play he watched with Tia on the day he confessed.]

I suddenly remembered Tia's face, how she cried as I refused to promise to come back. I also remembered the image of the kitten Tia, clinging to me. My lady had named her Luna. The moon.

Allendis slowly walks toward the edge of the cliff. Suddenly the strong gust of wind opens the green box Tia gave to him. The ribbons scatter and fly away and Allendis catches one. It's the green ribbon, the same one he gave to her before, the very same one he tried to strangle her slender neck with. It's torn and Allen can see the Dela flowers he has made embroidered inside.

What's going on here? This is what I gave to Tia.

Don't tell me you embroidered my hairband, Tia ? I gave you a pair, so that one day we might have a matching ribbon. And you took one of them and embroidered my initials on it and gave it back to me?

Allen laughs.

I'm sure you didn't know the meaning of this hair tie or why I gave you a pair. There's a legend that tells that if you carve your lover's name with Dela flowers, the two of you will be together for all eternity.

Even if you don't accept my love, my wish seems to have been granted. I'll take it as a sign that I can keep loving you.

Thank you, Tia. You say you want to shake off the shadows, but you allowed this vile shadow to keep chasing after you. Thank you very much, my lady. Because you didn't deny the shadow. This shadow who tried to give up on living because it was abandoned by its owner. I'm happy that I can keep chasing my owner.

Now I think I can answer your last question, Tia.

Yes, I'll come back one day when I get out of the darkness trying to devour me. I promise, I'll come back to you one day. I will surely return when the shadow chasing the Moon does not dare to think of swallowing the Moon.

So you've got to be fine until we meet again, my lady. My moonlight, my love, my radiant beauty. May you be happy until the day we meet again.

[End of Allen's POV & End of Volume 2.]

..................

AN

Ruth and Allen's problem don't stem from Ruth refusing to aknowledge Allen's talents. In fact, Ruth aknowledge Allen's genius so much that he knows Allen will be able to get a title of his own once he works for the Emperor. Ruth was also the third child of his family, and he won his title and fortune through his own talents. He wants Allen to do the same. And so he lets his eldest son get the title - as the tradition of the Empire requires. Ruth also knows that Allen is a sociopath who is unable to have empathy for others. So he thinks Alexis, who is warm and cares for everyone, is a better fit to run the estate.

Allen's feelings of rejection have no ground. Contrary to what he says, his parents and his brother care for him, and he's the one who despise them and reject them all the time. Allen cannot conceive that love can be generous and shared, and that his parents can love both Alexis and him. Allen's idea of love is exclusive : if you don't love only him, then you don't love him. It is further portrayed with Tia : he is ready to kill Keirean and lock Tia up for the rest of her life because of his conception of exclusive love. Only when he realises that he's been on the verge of killing Tia several times does he chose to go away to protect her life.

Ruth is only harsh with Allen because Allen refuses to get a title of his own. Allen is greedy and wants the fortune attached to a title (yes, it's plainly written in the novel) so if he can't get the Verita's title and fortune, he'll get the Monique's. Ruth takes Allen away from Tia under Mirkan's order to protect him. She's still Ruve's fiancée and what Allen has planned can be considered as treason. Allen will go all the way into the traitor's path by colliding with Duke Jenna and stealing secret information from his own father. In the manhwa he was even the one who gave the information who led to Tia nearly losing her life, and Carsein his eyes. Normally that would lead to the whole family's being guillotined. Allen never spared a single thought about endanreging his family - which shows how selfish and uncaring he is. Here you have your male lead who is only nice to Tia.

In the manhwa Ruve is even nicer than in the novel because he's the one who spares Allen's life and his family, by only sending Allen's on a diplomatic mission. Allen choses to commit suicide, and eventually to stay in exile and heal. But I think Ruve was extra fair and nice to Allen, considering the circumstances and the punishment the law allowed Ruve to give to Allen. Here you have the true gentle male lead.