《Grimoire: Retake》Chapter 9: A Brother's Monologue #1
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GR Chapter 9
#This chapter is written in Enri’s point of view
March, Four years old
I’m excited.
If you ask why I’m so excited today, it’s because today is my third, no fourth birthday. I couldn’t sleep well last night so I went to mommy and daddy’s room at night to share my feelings with them. Even when I got scolded by mommy for waking them up at midnight (by the way when is midnight again?)
Anyway, I’m really looking forward to this day because it’s my birthday. Birthday means parties, oh and birthday means presents. I hope I get that new limited edition fighting robot that just came out, but the transformable helicopter toy that can fly is good too. Mommy is stingy so she probably won’t buy them for me but daddy is better. I love daddy the most.
As expected, daddy is the best: he told me he has a surprise for me today. Uhehehe, I’m so excited that I can’t help but run around the house. I can’t wait for afternoon to come. Daddy, come back quick.
Oh, looks like daddy is back.
What is this?
Just what is this?
“Now come and meet your sister, Enri. “
In front of me and clinging to daddy’s leg is a little chibi who he just called my sister. Facing my stare, the girl shrank back to hide behind daddy’s legs. Hey! Just whose daddy’s legs are you hanging on to so closely! That’s my daddy right there!
“Enri, be nice and stop glaring at your sister Seri-chan, kay?” Mommy looked over and pulled the two of us to face each other.
“Now, try to get along, ok?”
The chibi looked at me timidly and then softly murmured something.
“nise…meek…chu…nii-cha” What did she say? I can’t even understand what this chibi is saying. This is just terrible.
“Now now, Enri you should greet her back, shouldn’t you?”
“NO! No way!”
“Enri, that is no way to treat your little sister.” What? Did daddy just scold me for this chibi?
As expected, this chibi is no good thing. She must be here to steal my place away. Anyhow, I’ve never heard anything about having a sister. I heard from the fat kid across the block that sisters are bad creatures there to steal our parents affection.
“ Liar! I have no sister! She is just an eyesore here to steal daddy from me! *humph*” I shouted and then looked towards the chibi: “I hate you!” before running away to my room.
“Uh, *sob* Uwaa!” I can hear the chibi burst into tears behind me.
“Enri! That is not what you should say to his sister! Come back here and apologize, right now!” Even daddy shouted to me.
“Now, now Seri-chan don’t cry okay? Mommy is sure your brother doesn’t mean that.”
June, Four years old
It’s been 3 months since my fourth birthday. Unfortunately, I have apparently gained a baby sister who I still am reluctant to accept. I mean, I never heard anything about having one since growing up till now(wait, did I?) and what does mommy mean by the chibi has been at the hospital all this time? Is she or is she not born from mommy and daddy? Other kids in the neighborhood have siblings since they were born but… I just don’t understand.
Moreover, it’s getting really, rea—lly annoying with this chibi. She is starting to follow me everywhere. She is so stupid, even till now she is still so timid. If it wasn’t for mommy forcing me to take her to play with me, I will just abandon her to run everywhere with the boys in a jiffy.
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“Hurry up and walk faster, will you?” The guys are probably in the park playing already. I sped up while thinking of wanting to play with them.
“um, wait por me. Ni-cha.” The chibi softly murmured.
Urgh! This is annoying!
“You know where the park is right? I’m going first.” Who cares? It’s not like this is the first time she is going there anyway.
“Ah, Enri is here!” By the time I arrived at the park, all the boys were already there.
“Oi! Over here!” Amid the group was a fat boy wearing a yellow cap on his head. He’s the leader of the group since he is one of the oldest in this neighborhood.
“Hey, did you bring it?” The fatty asked me as soon as I got to them.
“Of course, I promised didn’t I?” I said as took out the plastic Ranger set from my backpack.
“Wow! This is the premium set that were only available to a small circle of people! So cool!”
“How awesome! How did you get this, huh Enri?”
As soon as I took it out, gasps and sounds of marvel rang out from the boys.
“What do you mean how? Of course, my daddy got it for me.” I proudly claimed, and started to brag.
Actually, this was given to me as my birthday present but it comes with a very unpleasant condition.
“Um, Ni-chan…” the so called unpleasant condition has arrived.
“Yeah, just go play on your own or something- so where was I?”I inwardly clicked my tongue.
That said condition was to accept the chibi.
“You said the blue one is able to transform!” One of the boys said while touching and pulling on one of the robots.
By the time, I noticed it was already evening, and it was time to go home for dinner.
I said goodbye to the boys and turned to find the troublesome chibi playing on the sand at a corner.
A few girls was trying to talk to her but she just timidly said something back once a while. I’m sure what she said was so soft that they can hardly catch it.
I continued to look at her in a daze as I tried to recall what mommy said for me to buy for her at the convenience store on the way back.
Suddenly, the chibi got up and ran to one of the boys who was walking out of the park.
Looking closely it was actually the fatty who she stopped by pulling on the hem of his shirt.
Feeling like something is happening, I quickly ran to them.
“Give…gib… it bach…” The chibi softly said as she looked at fatty.
“huh? What?” Fatty turned his head after feeling a tug at his shirt.
“ … rechurn… to Ni-chan”
“ Huh? What did you say?” He loudly replied.
“Give… please…gib …back.” The chibi still stubbornly held on to the hem and demanded.
Hearing what she said, I remembered something and rummaged around my bag counting the number of robot toys: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5- 11, ah, it’s one short.
“Give what back?” Fatty said while his eyes were moving from place to place.
“Ro-roboc…Ni-cha’s”
“What robot? What’s it to do with me?” Fatty said as he pushed the chibi away from him.
The Chibi, with how small she was, almost fell on her butt with his push.
Seeing her like that, I felt like a nerve of mine was tucked and I quickly went to stand next to her.
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“What’s going on?” I held the chibi’s hand and confronted the fatty.
“Enri, your sister is strange. She is spouting gibberish and persistently holding onto my shirt.” The fatty quickly explained.
Hah! As if I’d buy that, bullying other people’s sister and trying to get away with it? Dream on!
“Really?” I looked down at the chibi whose eyes were already wet and tears almost falling down. I think she is either starting to get scared or hurting from the push.
“he..chook…ur… roboc…so… I… wan… bach.” She tried hard to hold it in until her cheeks were red and finally finished her words very slowly. For the first time ever, I felt like her current face is adorable making me want to tease her.
“Is that why you pulled his shirt?” Even though I already know she is not at fault, I can’t help but to tease her to force her to answer. The chibi didn’t disappoint and nodded her head making her already round and pouty face even rounder.
“She is lying! I don’t know anything” the fatty still denied.
“Okay, I got it but just to be sure. Can I check you bag since one robot is indeed missing?”
“No way. Why should I? Just because she said so? She is so strange.”
“She is just timid not strange and she is my sister, so what she says is what I believe. So let me check your bag.”
“No!”
“You-“ Feeling a tug at my shirt, I looked down to see the chibi saying: “His poget…in…his poket”
“Then what is that in your pocket? Quickly return it or I’ll do it the hard way!”
“So, so what if I took it? Here, have it back. I just wanted to take it back home to play with for a day!” Fatty finally took the robot out and threw it back to us.
“Just a dumb robot and you guys acted like I stole your money! Stupid siblings!” Looking at him coldly, I took the robot and put it back into my bag.
“Don’t mind what he said. Let’s go home.”
“Um.” I held her hand again and walked out of the park. For once, I feel like having this chibi as a sister is probably not such a bad thing.
On the way home, we went into one of the convenience stores and bought eggs and some milk for mommy. Just outside the store, I heard the sounds of an ice-cream truck. I looked around excitedly for the truck and as expected, it was parked across the street at the corner just a bit away from here.
“Come, let’s go get some ice-cream.” I told the chibi as I quickly turn to run to the truck while holding her hands.
“Waich… *gasps* don…*gasps* run.”
“Almost there so come on. Just a bit more.” I didn’t turn to look at her and pulled her along.
Suddenly, I feel my hand go loose and empty. The hand I was holding onto was gone.
The chibi probably let go as she couldn’t keep up huh. I guess I’ll just go get an ice-cream first and buy one for her too.
“Ooh!”
“What’s wrong?!”
Hearing the commotion from behind, I reluctantly turned around.
What I saw made my feet stop right in their tracks, and I can feel my heart going cold.
The chibi was laying there on the ground, motionless, and people were surrounding her.
“She just fell when running and fainted!” An old lady who saw what happened explained.
“Oh dear, what do we do?” Another said.
“We should call the ambulance! Quick someone call one!” A slightly knowledgeable passerby shouted.
I quickly arrived by her side and pulled her while calling: “Hey! Chibi! Hey! Wake up! Why are you sleeping here? Oi, Serika!” Seeing her pale white face and closed eyes, I panicked and the name I beratedly refused to say all this time subconsciously blurted out of my mouth.
“You, little boy! Are you her brother?” The man who asked to call an ambulance shouted.
“Yes I am.” I answered, muddled as I continued to shake the chibi up.
“Then can you call your parents? Do you remember their contact number?” Contact number? Oh!
“I do!”
“Then here, quickly call them!”
I received his phone with shaking hands and dialed the number daddy had me remember in case of accidents.
Very quickly, mommy and daddy came and in a rush we all rode the ambulance and entered the hospital.
Amidst the hustle and bustle with the adults speaking incomprehensible terms and notions, I felt like the time stopped as I watched doctors and nurses push the stretcher the chibi was lying on to what they called an operation room.
A doctor told us not to go in and to wait outside. Mommy was crying quietly as she sat there and daddy was comforting her. Why is mommy crying? What is wrong with chibi? What is going to happen to her?
“*Sob*... what are we gonna do? *sob* my poor child *sob* Oh God, please save my child *sob* she is only three. *sob*Oh, my pitiful child...”
“Mommy…daddy... Chib- no, Serika, is she going to be ok?” By the time I noticed, my voice was shaking and my eyes felt wet. Was I crying?
Hearing my quivering voice, both of them turned to me.
“*sob* Enri, how come *sob* you didn’t look after her properly!? Oh, even if you didn’t like her. At least, she is your biological sister! *sob*.” Mommy shouted at me angrily. I cowered as I have never seen mommy so angry, so scary.
“I- I didn’t… I don’t know… Uwaah!” why is this happening? Is it really my fault? I don’t know anymore. All of this was so confusing. I cried as I ran away from them.
“Enri! Honey, calm down. It’s not his fault, honey.” I heard daddy tried to calm mommy down into sitting back on her chair as I was running away.
I didn’t know how long I’ve been running. I just knew that I was crying as I sat in the gap of a row of vending machines.
“Well, well, there really is a crying boy here.” Hearing the foreign voice, I looked up to see a body full of white, a female nurse bending down to match my eyesight.
“None of your business! Go away!”
“Oh, what a rude boy you are. Here. ” The nurse looked unfazed with my outburst as she even handed me a cold wet tissue. I bet my face now is a wreck filled with tears and snot.
I again raised my head to see a kind smiling face looking down at me. Somehow, I felt my rowling emotions start to calm down for a bit. Slowly reaching out my hand to the tissue on her hand. Suddenly, she grabbed my hand and pulled me up.
“Now, that is no place to sit. Let’s sit properly somewhere and talk. Is that okay, little darling?”
“I’m not a little darling!” I retorted but I still let her pull me to sit on a nearby bench.
“Yes, yes. Let’s drink some milk and calm down for a bit, shall we?” The nurse sat me down and went to get milk from one of the vending machines.
We spent the next fifteen minutes or so drinking our milks in silence. I can feel the milk doing a good job calming me down.
“So, what’s your name?” Suddenly, the nurse asked as if to break the silence.
“Kurosawa Enri” I softly answered. I don’t know whether it was the milk or the calming atmosphere around the nurse, but I feel like it was okay to talk to this adult.
“Kurosawa, huh? I figured since I heard she fainted but… I see.” Hearing the nurse mummering something softly, I turned to look at her in surprise.
“You know me?”
“No, no, not you, but your parents are rather common faces here, you know?” The nurse smiled and explained.
“Common faces? Are they sick?”
“No, they are not sick.” The nurse quickly denied, and then she stared at my face for a while:
“Hmm, Enri-kun. What do you think about your sister, Serika-chan?”
“The chibi? I, I don’t know. At first, I don’t like her. She is too timid and annoying. She can’t do anything at all.”
“...I sometimes wondered, if she really was my sister.” Speaking till this point, my voice went softer and softer until they almost sound like a whisper.
“I see.” Instead of scolding me for thinking this way, the nurse softly said and then fell into thought for a moment.
Very quickly, she stood up and again bent down to match my sight as she extended one hand towards me: “Come on, I’ll take you to a place that can help you understand.”
What does she mean? Where? How come this situation is just like one which daddy told me to never follow strangers when they ask you to follow them to a fun place?
Perhaps sensing my suspicious look, the nurse stiffly scratched her head, and finally said: “I’m a legitimate nurse of this hospital, Takumi Rei. I’m also a close friend of your father Asuma-san, don’t you foolish boy remember my name from your father?” Trying to recall the name, I truly did feel like it rang a bell.
Reluctantly, I reached out to her extended hand, and followed her.
We walked past a very busy ward and into a another place that seemed to be less busy inside the hospital. As we stepped into the ward, I noticed the liveliness of the place.
There were many children. Some are barely standing, some about Serika’s age, some my age, and some even older. They were all wearing white hospital clothes, and they were all rowdily playing together, crowding around the nurses with some looking over having found me. Their eyes were glittering with curiosity. A few even wanted to come over but was held back by the ones close to them.
I don’t know why but I felt uncomfortable. Something inside me was reacting, finding something similar between the kids here and a certain chibi.
I thought this was the place the nurse was talking about but it seems it wasn’t. We continued to go further into the building.
As we went further, I start to notice the atmosphere changing from being lively and warm to becoming more quiet, more cold.
Finally, the nurse stopped before a half-opened door to a slightly bigger room. I curiously looked into the room.
There were six beds inside the room with three on each side of the room, and two of six were empty. One of the empty bed was the one on the corner on the right side while the other was on the left side and the furthest from the door.
The right side near the door was a bed with had a boy sleeping on it. Next to it was one with a boy with glasses lying on it reading a manga. On the other side, was one with a girl sitting up. The second of the occupied bed on this side, which was where a nurse was saying something, seemed to belong to a girl sitting on a wheelchair. The last bed near the window was empty.
“Momo-chan, it’s time for your medicine.” I noticed one of the nurse inside speaking to the girl sitting on the wheelchair who was arranging a flower vase.
The girl who looked about Serika or my age uninterestedly looked towards the nurse, then turned back to her flowers: “Not taking it.”
The nurse tried hard to persuade the girl: “How come? Don’t you want to get better? You won’t get better if you don’t take your medicine, you know?”
“What’s the point? I’m not going to get better anytime soon anyways.” The girl insisted loudly.
Her loud voice seemed to have caught the others attention. All the other patients, except the boy who was sleeping, looked at her for a moment then returned their attention to whatever they were doing again as if it was only normal.
The nurse continued trying to persuade the girl.
“These children have been staying here since they were born.” I couldn’t help but lift my head up when I heard what the nurse aunty’s words. Aunty nurse’s face was one of sadness.
Turning my head to look again at the room, I asked: “Why?”
She answered: “They are sick.”
“Sick? But they seem fine?” With how energetically the girl inside was arguing with the nurse, I found it hard to believe that she was sick.
“You see that girl on the wheelchair? Her name is Momo-chan. She is born with a weak lower body. Umm, how do I explain?” Aunty nurse stopped speaking for a moment then continued:
“Momo-chan, despite being already four, can hardly walk and not to mention run.” Is that why she is sitting on a wheelchair?
“That girl sitting up is Sae-chan. She is three this year but she is mute. Even now she can talk clearly.”
“That boy there sleeping is Rin-chan. He is born with a weak body that requires constant nutrition supplement. Simply meaning, he can’t survive without medicine and constant care.”
“And that other boy is Kotarou-chan. He is born with a hereditary disease. In other words, he will be staying here for many years to come.”
“Finally, do you see that bed near the window? That was your sister’s, Serika-chan’s bed. Serika-chan had a faulty heart. She had been staying here ever since she was born.”
Feeling confused, I asked: “Why do they have to stay here?” Why aren’t they the same as me? I can walk, speak, eat anything I want, and can run as far as I want.
The nurse then pulled me to a corner of the hallway, away from the door. She squatted down and put both her hands on my shoulders, matching our line of sight.
“They are different-no they are special.” Seeing me tilting my head, she continued: “Just as what happens to a fish that is out of water, they won’t live if they are not taken care of properly. Enri-kun is healthy, so you can do all of the things they can’t, right?”
“That in itself is a privilege, Enri-kun. It isn’t that your sister Serika-chan is useless, it is that she is just special. As for whether she is your biological little sister, I will full-heartedly assure you, she is born from your parents just a year after you were born.”
Everything after that was vague in my memory, I somehow find myself already standing in front of mommy and daddy again.
“Thank you so very much, Rei, for bringing Enri back.” Daddy was thanking aunty nurse as he took my hands into his.
“*sigh* Thank god you’re okay.” Once again hearing daddy’s warm voice, I feel like crying.
“I-” Just as I was choking on my words of apology, my body was suddenly taken into a sudden familiar embrace.
“Oh, Enri, my son. Where have you been? Mommy was so worried.” I can feel the warmth of mommy’s hug, making me choke even more on my emotions. Feeling like I had to apologize, I started to wriggle.
“Are you still angry? Mommy is so sorry! Mommy shouldn’t have blamed you!”
“It’s not that. Enri is not angry. Enri is- Enri is sorry *sob* Enri is sorry because I didn’t look after Serika properly. Enri didn’t listen to mommy’s word *sob* not to run around with my sister Uwaa!”
“It’s okay, darling. It’s okay. Mommy doesn’t blame Enri. Don’t cry.”
“Alright, alright. It’s not both of your fault, okay?” Daddy embraced us lovingly from behind.
“Besides, your sister is fine now.” Daddy broke into a relieved smile: “Why don’t we go see her now?”
“No, that is not allowed.” Aunty nurse who has been quietly looking at us wiped the waters around the rim of her eyes as she sternly proclaimed.
“Why?” Daddy who was usually composed, totally looked like an aggrieved damsel right now.
“She just finished her surgery and needs rest, so visiting is definitely out of the question.” Aunty nurse said while giving daddy a look as if asking whether he was an idiot.
“Right, right. I was too happy, I forgot. Hahaha.” Daddy awkwardly laughed only to receive an elbow from mommy.
A week later, I was finally allowed to go see the chibi again.
I was kind of nervous as I stood outside the door to her room.
“What’s wrong?” Daddy who was holding my hand asked.
“Daddy, what if the chibi, Serika, hates me now?” I’ve been worrying about this over the previous week I didn’t get to see her.
Surprisingly, It’s been very lonely this past week. I used to feel so annoyed at the tail following me known as Serika, but when she is not there, I felt as if there was a hole in my lifestyle. I sometimes even turned around and found myself unconsciously talking to the empty air behind me.
She was annoying but I missed her. I admit I really misses her.
“Ahaha, so that is what you have been troubled over since yesterday?” Daddy laughed until his eyes turned into curved lines.
“But- but, I did treated her badly.” I softly explained my quilty conscience.
“If it’s that, then you don’t have to worry, Enri.” Daddy stopped laughing then crouched down and put his hands on my soldiers to match our line of sight.
“Your sister, Serika-chan, will never hate her brother no matter what.” Seeing my confused expression, daddy continued: “You are her one and only dear brother after all. You didn’t see her expression everytime we told her about you. It was the brightest expressions she has ever shown in all the three years she has stayed here.”
“To Serika-chan, you are the person she loves and looks up to the most.”
Feeling a bit reassured from daddy’s words, I took my first steps into her room.
Feeling the presence of visitors, the Chibi, no Serika- no, my little sister quickly lifted her head.
That pale face quickly broke into a very, very happy smile, blowing all my worries way: “Onii-cha!”
Ah, so this cute girl is really my sister huh.
My cute, cute but weak little baby sister, Kurosawa Serika.
I feel another kind of happiness thinking of the days ahead of us.
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