《Meanwhile》Meanwhile 9 - Life is Not a Game
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Life is Not a Game
Until today, I did not really think of myself as the only sane god in existence.
Today I have learned how completely wrong I am.
Before I talk about why that statement is true, let me back up and talk about gods.
Gods come to be in a variety of ways.
Some simply emerge from the void.
Some are born in universes where being immortal is normal and they just.... get infinitely powerful.
Some use science to blow up a universe and use the energy to make themselves into gods.
Some find artifacts in their grandfathers sheds and just turn into gods.
All kinds of different ways.
I myself wasn't aware I was a god for a very long time.
I managed to, in a clerical error, stay in one of the underworlds a bit to long before being reincarnated.
I was thus able to remember by previous life and grow a bit stronger.
After the first time, it just kept happening. I'd live some crazy or boring life and then, after dying, remember all my past lives.
Also, I got a bit stronger every time.
This strength never helped my physical forms, but my soul eventually got so strong was considered a god.
A few times, my mortal self actually achieved immortality and I got my memories back but I always chose to reincarnate.
I guess I just got used to it or something. Maybe, I new that wouldn't experience anything new if I stayed a god.
Well, this continued on until yesterday. I was on an Earth, when suddenly a giant blue screen popped up.
Said something about how spoiled humans were and the wrath of god was descending.
I was a child soldier at the time. I died to a troll 30 minutes after the apocalypse started.
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When I died, I was stunned.
The fuck? Spoiled? I've lived a lot of lives and this was a first.
So, I decided that instead of immediate reincarnation I'd find out why a god would do something like this.
I asked around the underworld, visited some gods, looked around the plane of gods and came to one conclusion.
Gods are batshit insane. They have no concept of mortality. None. I mean, the worst ones are actually the former mortals.
The void gods just tend to..... do nothing all day or create planets and leave.
But the ascended gods? They actually go around interfering with mortals and laying judgement down.
I managed to avoid this, somehow, in all my previous incarnations, but sometimes a god will just go to a planet, ask someone for something and if they don't have it right then, blow up the planet.
Some of the "war gods", those ascended from tougher worlds casually introduce magic into billion year worlds and throw demons from the skies.
I meet a god who thought it was okay that they had turned a universe into a massive game-show.
You know why this gets to me? You ever watch Rick and Morty? Well, most universes are already like that.
Now imagine gods running around. I can't handle this, I'm taking control of this situation.
Time to flex my muscles a bit, reform these idiots.
From some of the challenges and attacks I got, I've learned at I've become the strongest god.... ever.
To make sure, I started forcefully killing the worst offenders and using their souls to strengthen mine.
Not into myself, that would corrupt me. I just made an army.
"From this point forward, no more of this sudden apocalypse video game shit, no more universe destroying riddles, and certainly no more glittering vampires. That is actually disgusting that some of you made those. "
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