Tuesday, she spent the day shopping with Darlene after work because she missed hanging out with her and she wanted some new things to wear. Elliot worked late but not all night so he said he’d come over after they got back, mostly to help Darlene carry the things she had bought back to his place where she kept most of her clothes. They had been co-parenting Darlene for a while like this, she sometimes crashed other places like Dom’s or some guy’s but she actually lived with Elliot and Raine, even before they met each other. Elliot came in wearing his trademark hoodie and black jeans but instead of a black shirt, it was white. Raine hoped he took his hoodie off because she’d never seen him in white. When he shut the door he opened his arms for Raine to hug him and she put her arms around his neck as he hugged her tight picking her up a little. She kissed his neck and whispered, “Hi baby, I missed you today.”

He moaned a little and sat her down, “me too,” he said and gave her a quick kiss.

“Hi, Darlene, my sister who I love,” Darlene teased. Elliot actually walked over and hugged her too. She looked surprised but didn’t protest, she looked a little moved by the gesture. Not that they were never affectionate, but it usually required one of them to be upset or for something big to be going on. Raine smiled at them as she started folding the clothes Darlene had bought and tried on at home. Raine had hers thrown around too because they had a fashion show and paired new things with old shoes and things.

“It is a disaster in here,” Elliot said.

“It’s just clothes,” Raine said, “we had to try them on with our shoes and things.”

He shook his head and Darlene started asking him what all he had to eat at his place. They had gotten dinner so Raine didn’t know how she was still hungry but she was probably hoping to coax Elliot into getting her fro-yo. Eventually, that’s what he offered and she smiled and started packing her stuff.

“Hang on, I want to hang out for a second,” he said. Raine sat on the bed with her legs crossed and he unzipped his hoodie and threw it over to Raine who got it and folded it up and sat it beside her. She looked up at him in his white shirt and dark skin and instantly wanted to be alone with him. He sat down on the bed then laid down with his head in her lap. His shirt came up a little revealing a little of his belly. He was saying something to her but she was distracted thinking about the happy trial of hair she could see going down into his jeans.

“Did you?” Elliot asked.

“Did I what?” she asked looking down into his eyes, he grinned and pulled his shirt down, she had no idea how he knew.

“Let Darlene hear your song?” he asked.

“It’s your song,” she said.

“Our song?” he asked.

“That works, but no I haven’t,” she said.

Elliot took out his phone and Raine said, “no, not while I’m here, it’s embarrassing.”

He looked up at her and she gave him a serious look, so he sighed and put his phone away and said, “well it’s really good, I lost count of how many times I listened to it.” Then he blushed and she tilted her head inquisitively. He glanced at Darlene to let her know it was private.

“I love all your music,” Darlene said casually, missing the private exchange between them.

“Thanks, guys,” Raine said, “can you get up a second babe? I need to move my legs.”

He and Darlene started talking about her songs as he raised up so she could stretch her legs out. Then she leaned back on her headboard and pulled her legs back bending her knees. Elliot scooted back between her legs and leaned back on her, resting his head on her breasts and his arms on her knees. She let one arm fall over him on his chest and used her other hand to comb his hair with her fingers. She listened to them discuss her music and enjoyed the feeling of his soft hair against the palm of her hand and in between her fingers.

“You don’t have a favorite?” Darlene asked her.

“That’s like asking which of your kids are your favorite,” Raine said, “but the last one, it’s a cover and I still love it so much.”

“You made it your own,” Elliot said.

“What song did you cover?” Darlene asked.

Raine didn’t want to say it out loud because Darlene knew about the cotton candy, and Raine knew she would tease them. Elliot however didn’t know she knew about the cotton candy so he said, “sex and candy.”

“Ohhh, and why that song in particular?” Darlene asked knowingly.

“She knows?” Elliot asked.

“Yep,” Raine said. Elliot sighed and Raine made a mental note to ask if she should not tell Darlene so much about their private time. She didn’t have any other girlfriends to talk to, so even the stuff she told Darlene wasn’t as much as she’d normally tell a girlfriend. But he knew how private Elliot was especially when it came to things like this. Suddenly, Elliot grabbed her hand and kissed it, he must’ve felt her tension.

“What was that for?” she asked.

“It’s okay… plus you were going to put me to sleep,” he said referring to her playing with his hair. He was such a mind reader, how did he know that she was concerned about her blabbing to Darlene? She looked down and half expected him to answer her thought. He didn’t so she scratched the short hair behind his ear with her fingernails and he leaned his head toward her hand like a puppy would.

“Stop,” he laughed.

Darlene fell down on the bed and crawled up and cuddled beside Raine. Raine looked over at her, “I wish you both could just sleep here with me, I’m going to be alone,” she pouted at Darlene.

“Come home with us,” Elliot said.

“We both have to work in the morning, and I still need to organize my notes of what I need to tell Krista,” Raine said.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not how therapy works,” Darlene said.

“Well I’m so happy in my life right now I know how it will be if I don’t, I will end up just sitting there saying ‘I feel great’,” she laughed.

“You can tell her good things too… so what has you so happy?” Elliot teased, playing with one of her rings.

She laid her head on his and said, “hmm… I don’t know, I did meet a guy named Jake yesterday.”

“Oh, yea? Was he hot?” Elliot asked.

Raine couldn’t continue the joke so she said, “Nah… but he was a douchebag, I’m sure that works on lots of women.”

“The sad part is that it does,” Elliot chuckled.

“What about your work girlfriend?” Raine asked.

Elliot leaned forward to look back at her, “who?”

“Cindy,” Raine said mockingly.

“You keep saying that name, who is that?” he asked, getting up and turning to face her.

“The secretary, she has a crush on you or something because she was so rude to me,” Raine said.

“Oh yea, she’s like that, she has dated a lot of the guys that work there, I think I’m the first one to say ‘no’ to her, but they all just use her anyway, I think she’s lonely,” he said.

“So, she asked you out?” Raine asked.

“Uh oh,” Darlene said getting more interested. Raine and Elliot rolled their eyes, and he said, “yea, once, nothing major just wanted to go get drinks after work but you could tell what she meant.”

“When was that?” Raine asked.

“I don’t know three or four months ago,” he said.

“Why did you say no?” she asked.

“Just wasn’t interested,” he shrugged, “why? Are you jealous?”

She scoffed, “no, why would I be?”

“You seem jealous,” Elliot said.

“Shut up,” she said, grabbing Sam and throwing him at Elliot.

“You really do seem jealous,” Darlene said.

“I am not! you guys, stop,” Raine said covering her face.

“Aww,” Darlene said wrapping her arms around her head.

“Darlene, can we have a minute?” Elliot asked.

Darlene got some of her stuff and kissed Raine on the cheek and told her goodbye because they did need to be leaving soon. After she was gone Elliot got beside of her and let out a little laugh.

“It’s not funny,” she pouted at him.

“I know, I’m sorry, are you though? I mean it’s okay if you are, you can tell me,” he said.

“No, well not really,” she sighed, “I trust you, and I don’t think she would ‘steal you’ or something weird like that,” she started.

“Of course not, I didn’t want her before I even met you,” he said.

“I know, but it’s just the thought of her asking you that, I just don’t like thinking about it, it makes me feel like beating her ass,” she said.

Elliot laughed out loud, “I can’t see that happening.”

“What? You don’t think I could?” she asked.

He picked up her arm and looked at it, “you’re kind of small to be talking like that.”

“I’m small but I can be feisty, I’m half Italian,” she said.

He smiled at her, “calm down, you’re not worried about her.”

She laughed, “well no not really, but it still just,” she shook her head, “I just feel like you’re mine and no one else’s.”

“I am, you know that don’t worry about anyone else,” he said, pulling her face to him and kissing her.

“We are so good at this,” she said.

“Kissing, I know,” he said going in for another one.

She stopped him and said, “no I mean… conflict resolution.”

“That’s cause we talk and are honest with each other,” he said, then thought about it, “mostly.”

She knew what he meant otherwise she’d have pushed it, they both had something they weren’t sharing but it was for their own good for the time being.

“Speaking of sharing, what was that look earlier, when you said you listened to my song repeatedly?” she asked.

“Oh,” he blushed, “well you know what you were singing about, I just picture that every time I hear it, us, that time that we…” he stopped.

“You mean when we were in your bed licking candy off each other?” she asked.

“Yea,” he said.

“I know that’s what I was thinking about when I sang it, is that why you blushed?” she asked.

“No, well kind of, just listening to you, thinking about that I got so… and well I just…” he stammered.

“Oh, I see,” she interrupted. She bit her lip and smiled at him, “that’s hot.”

“I don’t know why you think that, it’s embarrassing,” he said.

“No, it’s not, it’s flattering and sexy,” she said pulling him by his shirt into a kiss.

“I did that too, last night,” she whispered. He just whimpered into her mouth and pulled her by her waist so she was lying beside him. Then he got on top of her and kissed her, “what were you thinking about?”

“Obviously you, it was the song, the memories, it got to me,” she said.

“Do we have time to fuck?” he whispered.

She giggled and shrugged, then someone knocked on the door, “damn it,” Elliot whispered.

“Same,” Raine said, pushing him off of her.

“Just ignore it,” he said.

“I can’t,” she got up and opened the door. It wasn’t Darlene like they expected, it was Amber.

“What’s wrong?” Raine asked panicked, it was rare for someone from the shop to come up this late.

“You have a phone call downstairs,” Amber said. It was late for a supplier to be calling so Raine tried to think of who would call her on the shop phone and realized the only person it could be was Luke, she had changed her cell number so many times but the shops' number was listed.

“I’m so sorry Elliot, it could be important,” she said. He started to get up quickly and she said, “take your time, just don’t lock me out, I’ll see you tomorrow, love you.” She kissed him quickly and ran down the stairs in her socks.

She ran to her office where the main phone was, the other was in the kitchen, she yelled ‘got it’ and picked up the phone.

She waited for the ‘click’ on the other line and took a breath, she knew who it was from his breathing, “Owner and operator speaking,” she said because she wouldn’t dare admit it was her, to him.

“You’re still trying to hide but I know your voice,” the voice on the other line said, Raine thought to herself ‘if snakes could talk, this is what they would sound like’. She wished she had her cell with her so she could text Dom. She was shaking uncontrollably and wished she had told Elliot about this, just so he could be there with her at this moment.

“What do you want?” she finally said.

“Oh, honey you know what I want, forgive me and come back,” he said.

“Luke, you’re drunk, go sleep it off,” she said, voice trembling.

“Fuck you I’m not drunk,” he said. She felt herself get dizzy and knew she was about to start hyperventilating, she knelt on the floor and remembered what Mr. Robot taught her about putting her head down and breathing, she sucked in air and counted one, two, three, and exhale.

“HEY!” the phone shook, she knew it was impossible probably, but she felt it. She looked over at it and glared like he could see her through the phone. She wanted to hang up on him, but he had gone through all the effort of tracking her down, she didn’t know what had caused his sudden motivation but she didn’t know how far he would go.

“Luke,” she said into the phone.

“Listen to me you whore, one of my friends saw you with a guy at Coney Island, I told you if you ever tried to be with someone else I’d kill you or him, so tell me his name and I’ll leave you alone,” he said. She smirked a little, the dumbass just let her know he didn’t know who Elliot was, which was half the battle.

“His name is Jake,” she said.

“You must not like him too much to let him die in your place,” he said.

“Just leave me alone,” she cried, “leave Jake alone please,” she begged, to sell it.

“I’m just messing with you sweetheart, break up with him… and I will know if you don’t, or I’m going to do it, but not cause I want you in that disgusting body I ruined, I have moved on too, she’s hot and doesn’t complain like you did, you’re a bitch, and she’s sweet, young enough to train.”

Raine’s blood ran cold, “how young?”

He laughed, “younger than you were when I started on you, I learned my lesson, you were set in your ways.” Damn it, if only she’d have had Dom tap the phone line, he’d be pretty much caught on statutory, or at least suspicious. She was seventeen when they started dating, this girl had to be sixteen or younger and Luke was thirty-one. She wanted to kill him. She heard a noise in the background that sounded like a child laughing. Surely it wasn’t his new victim, she sounded like a kid.

“Oh, she’s back now, jealous?” he asked. She almost gagged on the phone.

“I’m happy for you Luke, what’s her name?” she asked.

He laughed, “I’m not that stupid, remember, I’m watching you.” He suddenly just hung up and she fell to the floor and started sobbing. She couldn’t even hang up the phone. She heard the door open and quick footsteps and someone was shaking her, all she could think was ‘I hope it’s not Elliot’. She knew if it was, there would be no hiding it anymore. And if he saw her like this and knew Luke caused it, no one could stop Elliot from killing him.

“Please get up, Elliot is gonna come back here and see you,” she heard Darlene whisper. She mustered all the strength she had to set up and wipe her face. Darlene helped her stand up and straighten up her hair and clothes and then Darlene grabbed the phone and hung it up. Raine started to get weak again and Darlene held her by the arm.

“I need to sit down, I’m going to be sick,” Raine said.

Darlene grabbed the trash can as Raine fell into the chair and leaned over, getting sick into the trash can. That’s when Elliot came in, he ran over to her instantly and said, “oh shit are you okay?” She was still getting sick so Darlene said, “I don’t know what happened, she said someone prank called her, and we were just talking and she seemed okay, then she just got sick, all at once.”

Elliot knelt down beside her and she hated this, she knew it was disgusting but he didn’t even seem bothered, he started gathering her hair up and held it behind her.

“You okay, baby?” he said softly, and she started to cry, which made him panic, “I’m taking her to the hospital.”

Darlene, who knew exactly what was wrong, she had thrown up from stress before too, said, “Elliot she had sushi and that makes everyone sick.”

“There’s no way she ate sushi, she hates sushi,” he said.

“Well it was probably something she ate,” she said.

“You think you need to go to the doctor?” Elliot asked Raine.

She had finally stopped puking, so she shook her head ‘no’ and tried to take deep breaths to steady herself. Elliot rubbed her back gently, “you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I think Darlene’s right, it was a one-time thing, I feel better now,” she said. She was still shaking all over and crying a little.

“Why you crying?” he asked, as he took the bottom of his shirt and started wiping her face and mouth with it. She couldn’t believe this guy, she wrapped her arms around his neck and said, “you’re just being so sweet,” it truly was part of the reason she started crying. He pulled her into a hug and she rested her head on his shoulder as he rubbed her back.

“I really want to take you to the hospital, just to be sure,” he said.

“Elliot I’m fine,” she said.

“You’re trembling,” he said pulling back to look at her and move her hair away from her face, “and pale, please.”

She sighed, “you have to get up early and since there’s nothing wrong they will do a bunch of tests and we’ll be there all night, not only do we both have to work early we have an appointment with Krista.”

He looked really worried, so she said, “if I get sick again, I’ll go, I promise.”

“Okay but I’m spending the night here, I’ll help Darlene take everything to my place and come back and bring my work clothes, it’s closer to work anyway,” he said.

“I’m glad you guys aren’t having kids, Elliot you’d be a helicopter dad,” Darlene said. He didn’t respond and Raine smiled at Darlene, who gave her a knowing look. This could be bad if Luke called back. But Raine knew she had pretty much no say in the matter, if she locked him out, he’d climb in the window. And if she made him go home, he’d stay up worrying all night.

“Okay,” she said finally, “and change your shirt, I’m sorry you had to get that on it.”

“It’s okay,” he said and started to stand up, he got her hands, “you feel like getting up?”

“Not yet, just tell Amber to come back when you leave and ask if she can bring me some water?” she said.

Elliot kissed her forehead and they said their “I love yous” and he started to leave, Darlene hung back and came over to hug her, she whispered, “phones tapped, I’ll call Dom.”

This actually did make her feel a lot better, she nodded and smiled, Darlene kissed her forehead and said, “bye babe.”

Amber brought her some water and she told her a little of what really happened, Amber had worked for her long enough to know Luke personally. Then she helped Raine up to bed, “Elliot should be here before you close, he doesn’t know about Luke still bothering me so don’t say anything.”

“Why? Is he jealous?” Amber asked.

“No… he’d kill him,” Raine answered.

“If I were you, I’d let him,” Amber said.

Raine laughed, “I would but he’d go to jail, I have a cop working on it, thank you for everything Amber, I’ll give you a little extra this week.”

“Don’t worry about it, just stay safe,” Amber said. Raine agreed not to pay her extra but she was going to anyway. Amber went back downstairs and Raine got up to brush her teeth and get ready for bed, she washed her face and checked her hair to make sure it was clean. She wanted a shower but was too scared while alone in the apartment, even though the shop was open. She hadn’t gone through this fear in a while, she didn’t shower at home alone for a few months after she broke up with Luke. She took her clothes off and put on Elliot’s shirt and a fresh pair of panties. She left her door unlocked for Elliot and cuddled in bed with Sam. She was still shaking a little, she hadn’t heard Luke’s voice in a year and a half. She couldn’t hide this from Elliot much longer, hopefully, the call would give Dom more to work with. She almost couldn’t stand the thought of being here alone at all, maybe Elliot had somehow sensed it. Or maybe it was fate, if he weren’t coming back, she’d be going crazy at the thought of being alone in the building when the shop closed. She laid there for a while and almost fell asleep, then she heard a light knock. Elliot slowly opened the door and walked in.

“You awake?” he whispered.

“Yea,” she said sitting up.

“Don’t get up, you feeling better?” he asked.

“Yea, I’m fine, I guess it was a one-time thing.”

He sighed heavily like he knew she was lying about something but she wasn’t technically lying, she just wasn’t telling the whole truth. She slid over so he could crawl in beside her, he sat his work clothes on the floor. He pulled his clothes off down to his underwear and laid down and stared at the ceiling. She knew he knew something was up and she turned away from him and cuddled with Sam, she felt physical pain from her guilt and she let a few silent tears roll onto the pillow. She felt Elliot get close to her and he pulled her shirt sleeve up to kiss her shoulder a few times.

“You want to have sex?” she asked.

“No, not tonight, it might upset… whatever caused you to get sick,” he said, like he knew it had to do with her mental state, then he said, “why? Did you want to?”

She just shrugged and he wrapped his arm around her and held her close. She felt like shit, like every problem they had was her fault. If it weren’t for her PTSD he could be sleeping at home or at least they could be enjoying each other. Elliot deserved someone who could be as good to him as he was to her. She didn’t even have the emotional strength to have sex with her boyfriend.

“You okay?” he asked, and she nodded, he hesitated and then said, “you want some space?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, was he breaking up with her?

“On the bed, am I crowding you?” he asked.

She calmed and took his hand and kissed it, then let him lace his fingers with hers, “no I like you holding me,” she said. She felt his breath on the back of her neck, and it calmed her.

“I love you,” he whispered, and she shivered from the sensation of his voice on her neck, and then she felt warm all over as she thought of his words and what they meant.

“Say it again,” she said.

He let out a little laugh and said it again, she pulled his hand to her chest and said, “I love you Elliot.” She started crying softly and she knew he could tell but he didn’t say anything about it. She softly cried herself to sleep.

Sometime later she awoke to the sound of the door slamming open, she turned over quickly and saw Luke jump on Elliot and start choking him. In shock she just stared as she saw the life leave Elliot’s face, she started screaming his name and crying and telling him she loved him. Luke turned to her and then started to beat her and hold her arms down. She closed her eyes and fought, clawing at him. Then she heard Elliot’s voice saying her name and telling her to wake up. She opened her eyes and Elliot was on top of her, she was panting and gasping wildly. Elliot held her down by her wrists and he had a bloody scratch on his jaw. When she saw this, she started sobbing and Elliot let her arms go and picked her up and held her to his chest as she cried.

“It was just a nightmare,” he whispered over and over.

“I hurt you,” she said looking up at him. He looked confused so she pointed at his jaw, he touched it and looked at his hand and saw the blood, he shrugged and said, “it’s just a scratch.”

“That’s what Mercutio said,” she sobbed.

Elliot let out a little laugh, then said, “Hey, what’s going on?”

“It’s a PTSD nightmare, I’ve had them before, but it’s been a while,” she said trying to calm down.

“So, you get a mysterious call, then get sick, and then this, does this have anything to do with what you say you can’t tell me?” he asked.

This is how effective hiding things from someone as smart as Elliot is, she thought. She didn’t respond.

“Who’s Luke?” he asked.

She gasped and looked up at him, “why?”

“First you were saying my name over and over and it woke me up, I thought you were having a sex dream but then you started crying, then you kept saying ‘Luke no, I love him, leave us alone’ and you started swinging your arms and kicking, I thought you were gonna hurt yourself because you were hitting anything you could connect with, so I got on top of you,” he said.

She swallowed hard, “Luke is… my ex, I dreamt he came in here and killed you and then he tried to kill me, I’m so sorry I scratched you.”

“Is he who called tonight?” he asked, she nodded. She expected him to go off but he stayed calm, “how long has this been going on?”

“Tonight is the first time he’s called,” she answered honestly, “I changed my number when we broke up, that’s why he called the shop… the reason he was so desperate to call tonight though was because someone he knows saw us, you and me, at Coney Island, I don’t know if they told on us because they are on his side or someone he knows just casually mentioned seeing me not knowing what the consequences would be, probably the latter. But he has sent me messages, on Facebook, not a lot, just whenever he gets drunk or mad, I don’t know,” she said.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Elliot asked looking hurt.

“I didn’t want you doing something about it, and getting yourself in trouble,” she said.

“Well I have to do something,” he said.

“No, you don’t, I’m taking care of it,” she said and he looked confused, “I asked Dom to help me build a case to send him to jail, Darlene and her have been investigating and the FBI is behind them,” she said. Elliot relaxed a little, this was going a lot better than she had expected.

“Are you mad?” she asked.

“At him? Of course, I want to kill him but at you? No, no I’m not mad at you, but I’m a little hurt that you didn’t trust me,” he said.

“If you found out about it and the FBI weren’t doing something about it, what would you have done?” she asked.

He looked caught and said, “I would kill him, I would call Leon and we would get rid of him and no one would know.”

“See? That’s what I didn’t want,” she said.

“What did he say?” Elliot asked, “on the phone?”

“I don’t want to talk about it… please… can we just stop talking about it until we see Krista?” she pleaded.

He nodded and pulled her close, “you’re okay,” he kissed her forehead and she cried softly as he rocked her to sleep.