《I am not the Hero》12. Lies

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Soaking in the bathtub, Theo's eyes were closed.

Taking a deep breath, his pores slowly opened; nature welled up into the inner parts of his body, filling him with energy, 'So this is unfiltered Magia—it is more potent than I initially thought; however, its nature is still the same.'

Like Oxygen, its output and input to the body and surroundings were controllable. Too much for and it could collapse the vessel, too little and it eventually leads to being weak and fragile.

Unlike Oxygen, however, Magia could not be broken down with simple logic. Its existence was tied to higher beings, beyond Gods and Deities. Magia exists; everyone knows its existence, acknowledges it, and manipulates it to suit different needs.

Used in almost everything, but its source remains unknown.

It could be said that it comes from the World, but that's not entirely correct.

The Universe lives, and so does the World. Like plants and living breathing organisms, the Universe produces unfiltered energy, and the World inhales it and spreads it into its "body," which people call Magia.

He opened his eyes, and the Magia dissipated, 'I can't have Magia in my system just yet. It's not normal. I haven't even learned what my Gift is. I should get to that first, don't I?'

However, he at least used the Magia to help his recuperation.

Trickle!

Stepping out of the bathtub, Theo wiped his body down and returned to his room. Underneath was a note that read—

[I shall be in my room — Rose]

"She already knows what I like… she's quite insightful."

It was the same easy-fitting clothes that Theo had worn before.

On the bottom of the clothes, another letter was left behind.

[Good luck with training Dear <3]

Theo laughed, but he felt a little odd, 'She's more assertive than I thought....'

Remembering the earlier incident, Theo suddenly laughed.

Keeping both notes on his breast pocket, he decided that it was time to go.

'Now to receive Lessons from Mother Thalia… I give up—' Correcting himself had now become more tedious.

He just smiled as he walked out of his room, ready to listen to an otherworldly version of someone he had learned a thousand times before.

Pulling the door's handle, Butler Viel stopped his forward.

"Butler Viel? Is something the matter?" he asked in a slightly more relaxed tone than before. But in the moment of doing so, he chose to look away, shyly, "I… ah… sorry about before… I just learned from the books that… helping get change was normal…."

"…Ahem~ I do not mind, Young Master, I was also in the wrong for not thinking of the situation…. AHEM~" Butler Viel cleared his throat, "Anyway, I am just here to say that Lady Thalia will not be able to join you and teach you the way of Spell Arts."

"…does it have something to do with Mother Laura's violent convulsion yesterday?"

"Sadly."

"I see." Theo looked up and just sighed, '...'

He was worried.

"Lady Thalia cannot join you, so she told me to tell you something."

"Hmmm?"

***

[10:00 AM]

[Magister Library]

Alba "Dragon Slayer" Sigurd, a man known for his gallant and breathtaking tale of ascension to Nobility. He's a man said to have received the Guidance of the [Greater Beyond] and received a [Regal Weapon] after finishing his Adventure.

He has a relatively small territory, but its Knights could match a Kingdom's, and that he's a man that never smiles outside of the Battlefield, or that his blood is silver instead of red.

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He is a man that already transformed into a living Legend, even receiving the title of Hero from the people.

However, other than his strength, Alba's also known by many for his love of collecting books.

The Sigurd Household was known for its advocation of learning the letters. Their descendants were all brought up to read and write as early as possible.

The populace had a public school unlike other Kingdoms, and Alba was even known to collect many books of various genres. Thus, a significant number of libraries were constructed around the Sigurd Manor.

The [Family Library] was the most generalized and easily accessible Library of the house. While the other four Library was disconnected from the mansion, the Family Library was inside the Main Mansion. The Family Library holds the Family Records and some other inane knowledge accessible only to the direct descendants and close friends.

Located North of the Manor was the [War Room Records] was where Alba goes to collect historical records and concurrent records of every war he could find. Strategies, Raising Armies, creating Makeshift functioning toilets in a war camp, and many others related to war.

On the East of the Manor was the [Ancient Library]; in any Era, knowing the World was as important as inventing new ways to increase the efficiency of work of the present.

Lastly, over at the West were the three separated floors of the [Magister Library]. Three floors for three Paths, Martial, Illusion, and Spell Arts, respectively.

Theo opened the doors of the Magister Library; no one was inside at the moment.

'They cleaned it of people as I had requested.'

He thought to himself, seeing the desolate building—

"You finally arrived, boy."

"Huh?"

The Library wasn't as empty as Theo had thought.

A middle-aged man stated as he fiddled with a string by the door.

'An Invisible Fang?' the string was the first that caught Theo's attention. It was, after all, a quality weapon he preferred to use in several lifetimes.

"Good eye as always, boy."

"Ah! Sorry for staring."

"Don't worry; it's amusing to know you are aware of their existence. It was the same when you first saw it."

"Um, sorry sir, but, who are y—"

"Right… you suffer from amnesia." The old man just smiled and waved his hand, "So I supposed an introduction is at hand. I am Karte, please to meet you, Young Master."

"To you as well, are you, a Butler of the household?"

"No, just a simple librarian. Moving forward, I heard from Butler Viel you want to read about Spell Arts, right?"

"Yes?"

The librarian rummaged around his scholar's robes. He brought out something and handed a book to Theo.

"This is?"

"The thing you asked of me a week ago, though you can't remember that anymore, can you?"

"...Sorry."

Karte showed signs of disappointment, "Either way, that is all that I am going to be giving you today, Young Master. If you read the book and are still interested in using Strings, I will be glad to teach you. Though I won't be giving you the strings for the time being."

Other than the book, Karte was also supposed to give Theo a box containing a set of strings but decided not to, seeing his current condition, "That's all I have to say."

Karte stood up from where he sat, "I should be taking my leave now. Viel asked me to empty the Library for you, after all."

"Thank you for the book and assistance." Theo lowered his head ever so slightly.

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Karte just raised his hand, "Yeah, yeah—"

Clack!

The doors closed behind the odd librarian.

"Strings, huh." Theo laughed it off but kept the book away. He planned on using them for later.

The Magister Library was split into three Sections.

First Floor — Martial Arts.

Second Floor — Illusion Arts.

Theo directly climbed to the third floor.

Though his legs did hurt as he climbed up, it didn't really bother him.

Third Floor — Spell Arts

[10:19 AM]

'Let's begin.'

Without wasting any time, Theo rummaged around the floor and sought out every book he could gather about the fundamentals of Magia.

~Magia is the source of life, and when it is drawn to the [Heart Core], it transforms to [Mana]—

~there are several branches of Mana Usage—

~Magic and Spells are—

'Hooh, it's more varied than I thought.' Theo praised as he finished reading thirty books on entry-level Magia Laws in a manner of minutes.

From what he gathered, there were three different Cores located in the body—

The Heart

The Mind

The Navel

These three, when filled, would transform Magia into different forms in correspondence to an Art.

The Mind Core would turn Magia to [Prana]

The Navel Core would turn Magia to [Aura]

The Heart Core would turn Magia to [Mana]

'So, there's a segregation.'

While casually seated on a chair, Theo closed his eyes and sensed Magia around him and allowed it to enter his body ever so briefly.

As a man who got a hold of thousands of different powers, circulating and manipulating invisible forces like Magia was straightforward; in actuality, Theo already grasps half of the passage in the body.

Every access point, a majority of the major paths, a tiny number of auxiliary veins, and the locations of the empty cores.

Theo distinguished the difference between the three cores and how every opening would close if one were filled.

How the muscles would react when the Navel Core awakens, how the eyes would appear to the Mind Core, and how the Veins would connect the Heart Core.

All of it, he gathered filtered in a manner of a second. Theo was no genius in such a thing; no, he was just someone who learned it over time.

Anyone could do what he can if they spend the same time relieving nightmares after a nightmare.

Some Elves or long-lived Races might even match his knowledge, but even them could not know everything at such an early age.

'It's easy, but the laws of Spell Arts in this World is rather complicated. I can learn it in a short period, but I think I shouldn't reveal these skills for now—' all of a sudden, Theo forcefully stopped his thoughts… something about his own ideas did not match his own set of personal values.

Crack!

'Huh? Why wouldn't I want to show off again? Realistically speaking, if I show them my strength, my abilities, then I'll be able to live a much better life, resources will flow, and my power will skyrocket….'

Theo questioned, but, thinking it through, shrugged these thoughts to the back of his mind thinking it was just the Goddess or the original messing with his thoughts again.]

'Huh? No! That's not true… this is different… why would my values on power and strength be affected by my synchronization to the Original? I can understand if it is about my laziness or my empathy to my family… but… no, this is different—this is the truth of any and every World… so, why… am I thinking like thi—'

Tzzzz

'This headache again... what... is happening? What are... these thoughts?'

Theo, or rather Heruzen, still wanted to play the ordinary role in the surface world. A neatly fashioned façade away from the turbulent life of life's set script]

"NO! SHUT UP!" Theo, no, Heruzen's eyes twitched, his mind currently in shambles, "That is not what I am thinking! These are not my thoughts—why… are these, thoughts… invading… me…."

He was in pain, but in mere moments it returned to norm—]

"What are these? Wait... are these... narrations?" Theo, no, Heruzen's eyes widened.

Narrations.

Thoughts.

Disbelief.

Doubt.

Theo's fingers dug through his palms.

Derision.

REALIZATION!

"Shit. No, no, no...."

Heruzen bit his lips, and his flesh ripped.

Acceptance

Anger!

"NOOOOOO!!!!"

HATRED!

BAM!

Theo fell to his knees, his arms slammed on the ground, "DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! DAMMIT! HOW CAN I FALL FOR ANOTHER LIE!?!?!"

Blood dripped on the floor, around him, a pool already formed.

"Not again!"

His eyes, bloodshot, his ears bleeding, he was in pain… but why should it matter?

"That Bitch! SHE LIED TO ME!"

[Theo cursed as he always does and blamed the Goddess for his odd activit—]

"STOP IT!"

[Theo's thoughts ran amok, but being the rational creature that he was, he did his best to pace his breathing—]

"I SAID SHUT UP!!" Theo grasped his head, and then his heart, his face, slowly and gradually turned red. In pain, reality shifted and turned for him; his vision wanted to shut off, it tried to return his mentality to normal, but, Heruzen wouldn't allow it anymore, "GET OUT OF My HEAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!"

Shhhhhhh!

Magia from all corners shuddered under his commands. The Magia that he did not have became a puppet for him to control, as though the shackles finally came loose.

The power he could not bring to any world surfaced, a force so strong it ran amok in the Realm of a God.

It scorched his Mortal Flesh, for containment was impossible. It was painful, but he could hardly care.

Disbelief and Hatred overwhelmed him too much even to care.

"I was a fool to believe..."

[The Magia was accepted in his heart… but feeling his life withering, Theo instinctively halted his ac—Heruzen! STOP!]

"To believe that I will be free to live... when did it start? Since the time I felt a connection?"

[Listen!]

"Since I woke up and decided to act... or was it the moment I accepted your terms?"

[HERUZEN]

"I only wanted to live... I thought I got to... but it was all a delusion... again, a script I can't even determine~."

Heruzen no longer listened to the suggestions in his mind, the narrations now blurred, only anger remained… again, he was lied to—

"YOU PROMISED TO GIVE ME CONTROL OF MY FATE!" Heruzen shouted, his body letting out hazy steam of pure Magia.

[No, you don't Understand, I was protecting you from—]

"No, you're the one who doesn't understand! I just wanted to live! I just wanted to enjoy life as it could be! I know what I can and can't do! I LIVED BY THOSE RULES; I SAW WHAT WAS WRONG! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO JACK SHIT! YOU SHOULD'VE JUST LEFT ME ALONE!"

[Heruzen, wai—]

The entire third floor then shook with Magia… his body trembled as his heart opened and accepted the flow—

Magia transformed to Mana… the World was molded to his will… and Mana changed to Fire—

[STOP!]

"WHY CAN'T YOU SET ME FREE!!!!"

BOOM!

Soon, the entirety of the third floor exploded into a might blaze of Heruzen's burning hatred but, atop that hate... what remained was sadness and disappointment, knowing the family he thought he had was but fabrications.

Again, his life was but a lie.

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