Sky is a disobedient pansy. It actually refused to carry out my order to peck Justine stating and I quote, “Miss von Gustogh is not directly threatening your life.” Bullshit. I can barely walk as it is due to not only a lack of sleep but also because of all the abuse I had to put up with last night. Damn it Sky, at least help me exact my revenge. Blake won’t let me shoot Justine in the face. Maybe I can shoot her in the back…Yeah, let’s shoot her in the back. Actually, let’s shoot her ass. That’s revenge for spanking me when we first met. I start to reach for my gun when someone grabs my hand.

“Linds, you really need to get some sleep. You’re muttering your thoughts out loud again.”

Volt…of course you would stop me. Stop stopping me. I want to shoot her. Let me shoot her.

“Don’t shoot your future wife. And stop muttering.”

“…I hate you brother.”

“No you don’t.”

“Maybe. I didn’t get to sleep at all cause of that damn demon.”

“You mean Daemon. And why? Did you finally consummate your marriage?!”

“Fuck you. No…she kept me up all night…for other reasons. And she wouldn’t let me skip lunch to sleep in.”

“And you say I’m the one that is whipped.”

“At least Blake doesn’t have the ability to set you on fire. That’s really the only reason I put up with her for now.”

“And because you have a major crush on her but you don’t want to admit it to yourself.”

“Did I ever mention how much I hate you?”

“On multiple occasions. Just fucking admit you like her already.”

“…Fine. I do. She’s fucking rude and is a sadist but she did help me when I was feeling really down. Like, really helped me. Without judgement. Hell, she even stood by me when Jacque threatened me. And she does keep things interesting. Oh and her cookies are fucking amazing.”

“So fucking do something about it already. I’m tired of watching you fuck up another potential relationship by doing nothing.”

“Not yet.”

“Is my little brother scared of rejection again? You poor baby. Shall I get your pacifier?”

“Fuck off. She obviously has the hots for me as well. Why else would she demand that I remain at her side like some kind of trophy? Watch, I’ll find some female Beast, flirt with her, and Justine will get all huffy and puffy and try to exact some sort of punishment. That’s her way of ‘claiming’ me and a fucked up way to show me she likes me. I guarantee it. It’s like kindergarten all over again. Kick him/her in the shins and run away to show that you like her/him.”

“….Linds, is agitating Justine, the lady who can, as you said, literally set your ass on fire and bury you alive with a wave of her hand the smartest thing to do?”

“Probably not. Oh look, there’s a girl…I think. Is that a girl? I think that’s a girl. Yeah, that’s a girl. She’s got tits. Okay, see you later, Volt.”

“You do realize that she looks like a wolf right? You’re practically about to engage in bestiality.”

“I’m just going to flirt with her, not try to have sex with her. Get your brain out of the gutter. Jeez….and I’m the one who is supposed to be sleep deprived.”

“This could only end badly, Linds…”

“But you’re not stopping me.”

“Hell no. It will be highly entertaining to watch this disaster unfold.”

“You’re a great brother.”

“I know. Go strut your stuff, playboy.”

Flipping my middle finger at the dumbass ginger, I walk towards the table where the wolf looking Beast is sitting. Her fur is completely grey. If I had to really describe her, she looks like a grey timber wolf but is able to walk on her hind legs. She is wearing army pants and combat boots. On her back is a bo staff. Interesting choice of a weapon considering that so far most people have some kind of blade. She instead is going for a blunt weapon. So what, just bash the cores to smithereens?

“That is precisely what I do.”

“Huh?”

“You asked if I just bash the cores to smithereens. That is what I do.”

“Oh…I said that out loud?”

“Oui? Is something wrong, monsieur?”

“No…Sorry. I just haven’t been able to sleep recently.”

She also has a French accent. Just like Jacque. But unlike Jacque, she seems like the type to occasionally switch into French. Huh. How interesting.

“What is interesting?”

“Nothing... Sorry. I apparently think out loud when I am severely sleep deprived. So, what’s on the menu for lunch? And where do I go to get food?”

The French timber wolf looks at me funny. Can’t she see that I am not a crewmember and for that matter, I’m not even a Beast? And speaking of which, I completely forgot that I was supposed to be flirting with her. Fuck it. I’m hungry. I need food. Then a nap.

“Didn’t you come here with your mate, monsieur?”

“What mate?”

“The 4th Princess of the Daemon Clans. You are bonded to each other as mates, are you not?”

“Why would you think that?

“You two slept in the same room last night.”

“That was because…wait, is it considered wrong or weird for two women to sleep in the same bed?”

“No. It is actually very normal.”

“…”

“Her Highness acts less formal around you and we have even heard her make jokes with you. Usually Daemons are very formal and reserved unless they are with fellow Daemons or loved ones. I just naturally assumed you were her bonded mate with how casual you two are with each other and considering you’re not a Daemon.”

“That bitch…I’m going to kill her,” I mutter to myself.

“I’m sorry?”

“Nothing. Just talking to myself. Anyways, I am not, what was it, bonded to her.”

“Oh. I see.”

Awkward. So fucking awkward. At least this confirms my suspicions that Justine does have a crush on me. HA! I knew it. I’m not completely oblivious. Most times, yes. But not always. I mean, if a girl literally just demanded to share a bed with you, chances are, she likes you. The only way she could have been even more obvious was to strip me naked, get naked herself and start having sex with me. Which, I might add, did happen to me when I was younger when I was completely oblivious to these things. But that’s a whole different story altogether. Heh. And embarrassing as hell. Cause even after that happened, I still was not sure if the girl liked me. Fuck off! Relationships are confusing!

“Anyways, I wanted you something, Miss…what is your name?”

“Corporal Francine de Gralle.”

“de Gralle? Are you related to the Captain?”

“Oui. He is mon older brother.”

“But…I’m so confused.”

“Are you not familiar with the Beast Tribes?”

“Where I am from, we do not have any Beasts. So no. I am not familiar at all.”

“How interesting! I would love to visit your homeland! Well, le Capitan, mon brother, and I may look different but we are siblings and we share the same blood. Our mother is a bird-type Beast and our father is an ox-type Beast. Nobody really knows why we all turn out the way we do but all Beasts are compatible with one another. When Beast children are born, it is impossible to know what kind of Beasts they will be. Even if I have children with someone who is also a wolf-type Beast, our children may not necessarily become wolf-types.”

“That sounds very…complicated.”

“Our scientists haven’t figured out the reason for this yet. But there are theories that it is decided by Erde to create balance in our species. Other theories are that it is based on the elements in our souls. But truthfully, these are all just theories.”

“I…see.”

“Oui. But you wanted to ask me something I believe.”

“Hmm? Oh right! Um, may I pet your tail?”

The Beast gasps and her eyes shoot wide open. All of a sudden, I can feel all eyes in the room look at me. I swear, the room is now dead silent. Not even the sound of people chewing is heard. The only sound was the hum of the engines in the distance. I wonder if I just asked to do something highly inappropriate.

“I don’t mean anything by it! I swear! It just looks so soft and I got curious!! Did I say something wrong??”

“It’s just, usually only lovers would touch each other’s tails and they do that privately…in the bedroom...”

“Oh.”

“It’s fine! Don’t worry about it! I know you’re not aware of our customs and you don’t have any bad intentions. You don’t have any other intentions, right?”

“Of course not!”

“Then, how about a compromise?”

“Compromise?”

“Your hair. I have never seen black hair before! Black fur, yes but not black hair!”

“So, your tail, for my hair.”

“Yes.”

“…Suuure…Weirdest. Negotiation. Ever.”

I sit down next to her on the bench. Francine pushes her food tray aside as she straddles the bench. Her tail moves up away from the table. She grabs it and brings it to my hands. I reach for it and at the same time, she starts to feel my hair.

I start to stroke her tail which causes her to stiffen a little but she eventually relaxes. I just realized that as I think this to myself, it sounds like I am doing foreplay with this girl and we’re about to have sex. That is not the case. Sheesh. My mind is so fucked up today…

I can imagine it now; a human is petting the tail of a wolf-type Beast and she is petting a human’s head. We must look quite the sight. The entire galley is still eerily silent as everyone watches us. I wonder what is going through everyone’s mind. Volt is probably trying hard to stifle his laughter right now.

You know, her tail is ridiculously soft! Holy shit! It’s amazingly soft! I wonder if she is just as soft. It really is like petting a dog back home. Specifically, a Siberian husky. I used to have a husky as a kid. Best pillow I ever had. But this Francine will probably have my old dog beat.

She starts to massage my head as she gently pulls and tugs at my hair. She sniffs it every so often and examines some individual strands closely. Honestly, it feels really, really weird. I mean, I’m petting this girl’s tail and she is petting my head. So weird. So…

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SISTER?!?!”

“Uh oh,” I say as I let go of Francine’s tail. I know those two voices that shouted at me at the same time. One belongs to a very angry purple Daemon and the other belongs to a very angry snow leopard-type Beast. I look up and I see the two of them storming their way across the galley towards me. People hurry to get out of their way but the occasional poor sod gets knocked over and pushed aside without a thought. Soon, the two of them are standing over me. Jacque has his spear out and it is again pointed at me while Justine’s red eyes have flames coming out the side of them.

“Hi, Justine. Hi Jacques. How are you? Lovely day isn’t it? Have you eaten yet? I haven’t and I’m starved. Where’s the food at?”

“What were you doing?” Justine demands.

“I was petting her tail,” I answer matter-of-factly. No point trying to deny it.

“What were you doing to my sister?!” Jacque’s saliva practically sprays at me as he demands my answer.

“I was petting her tail. Why is this so hard to understand? I literally just said that 2 seconds ago.”

Jacque’s spear thrusts in the air at me and stops just short of stabbing me in the head.

“BROTHER!! Please! He just wanted to know what mon tail felt like!! He didn’t have any other intentions!”

“STAY OUT OF THIS, FRANCINE!!”

“Well, that is just rude. You realize that she was petting my hair, right? That doesn’t bother you?”

“SHE WHAT?!?!”

“Justine, don’t get so angry. You’ll get wrinkles. Look you two, I was curious about her tail and she was curious about my hair. You know, I would love to pet your tail too, Jacque.”

“NO!” both Jacque and Justine cry out loudly.

Justine immediately starts blushing as the entire room looks at her, including Jacque who slightly gaped at her. Awww, she’s so bashful all of a sudden. I should tease her a bit more.

“What’s wrong with me petting Jacque’s tail, Justine?”

“It is…wrong!”

“What about it is wrong?”

“You…Because I said no!!!”

“Oh Justine. Just admit you’re jealous. Would you like me to pet your wings? Would that make you happy? I’ve been wanting to do that too, you know? They look rather soft. And comfy. Aaaand you’re on fire.”

Justine’s eyes literally burst into flames as her wings extend. The really scary part is that her wings also burst into flames too. Huh. I may have pushed her a little too far. People are starting to back away to the walls, not wanting to get caught in the oncoming crossfire but at the same time, not wanting to miss what is about to happen next. They’re kind of useless aren’t they?

“DO NOT CALL MY CREW USELESS!!!”

“Did I say that out loud? Fuck I’m really sleep deprived. I didn’t actually mean it. Sorry, Le Capitan. I really am…you mind putting down that spear? I mean, if you kill me, Justine might actually destroy this blimp in anger. It’s pretty obvious she has a huge crush on the being you’re pointing that spear at considering how possessive she got when I asked to touch your tail...”

Time to start running. I know what’s about to be said before it was even said by the two of them. I get up from the bench and run towards the kitchen. Why the kitchen? Well, I still haven’t eaten. I’m pretty sure there is food in the kitchen.

“Captain Jacque, kill the human.”

“With pleasure, Highness!”

“WAIT!!!” I yell as I stop and turn around right before the door to the kitchen. Surprisingly, Jacque and Justine don’t move and actually wait for me to say what I want to say.

“Which human? There are three of…never mind!!”

Heh. Probably not the smartest thing to ask. Being tired is messing with my logical side, not that my logical side makes any sense in the first place when it isn’t sleep deprived. At least this is a good way to stay awake.

And it’s really fucking fun to mess with people.

I dive into the kitchen as fire and wind blast the area I was just standing on. Is it just me, or did they attack me really slowly? Probably just my imagination. Oh wow, this kitchen is huge! And there is food everywhere! Plenty of places to hide. Good. I could hide and taunt at… Oooo, a sandwich. I wonder what kind it is. I grab it and take a bite. Hm. Not bad. Tastes like…roast beef with mayo and a tomato. Actually, this is pretty good. Damn, I finished it. And I can’t find another…OH! Jackpot! These look like fries! Sweeeeeet.

I grab a handful of fries and shove them in my mouth. Yup. Definitely fries. Wonder what else they got? Oh, damn. Looks like Jacque and Justine are inside now. Aaaaaand so are everyone else. Except everyone else is just standing outside the door, peeking in. Cowards. Stop your bosses! Wait, are you guys betting on this?

“Hey! No gambling on my life here! And if you are gambling, put me down for the human knocking out Jacque and making Justine stop on her own free will. Ooops!”

I duck as Jacque throws another gust of wind at my head when I peek over the counter I was hiding behind. Seriously, I really should keep my mouth shut. Nah. Too boring. This is more exciting. Oooo! Jacque knocked over a bowl of chocolates! 5 seconds rule!!

“Linds! I got you down for 50 creds! Don’t die!! We don’t have any creds so if we lose, we’ll have to work it off!!”

“Tmphaks!”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full! I can’t understand anything you say!”

I swallowed the chocolates in my mouth and clear my throat. Damn I could use some water right now. And just like that, Justine knocks over a jug of white liquid. I’m going to guess that is milk. It’s pouring off the counter and onto the floor. Let’s not waste it! I get underneath the milk fall and start drinking. I should probably respond to Volt now.

“Thanks, Volt! Wait, why isn’t Blake stopping this? And come to think of it, why aren’t you stepping in like you did yesterday?!”

“Yesterday was different! You can take care of yourself! Besides Blake already left! I think she went back to the room to tinker with Alpha! So go nuts!”

True. Yesterday, we weren’t entirely sure if Jacque was actually going to kill me or not considering what he heard from the Contagions that he had just fought AND he did just kill one of his own officers. Today, well, I’m about 95% sure that he won’t kill me. After all, what reason does he have besides the fact that I just teased him and the 4th Princess of the Daemon Clans? Nah, Jacque and Justine just want to beat the shit out me. They won’t kill me.

How am I so sure? Well, Jacque actually removed the blade of his spear before he entered the kitchen, essentially, making his spear a staff…thing. That’s how I know he won’t kill me. Justine hasn’t even drawn her blade. I’m in no danger. At least, not my life. My physical being on the other hand, that is a different story.

But still, typical Volt. Whenever I got in got in a fight because of some stupid shit I did, he just stood to the side and placed bets with people as he watched. Usually, I won those fights. Maybe not at first but I got good enough at the end. Blake on the other hand would always step in and stop the fight before it even got started. Sadly, or fortunately, Blake isn’t here. Neither is Sky, although I doubt it would help me right now.

At that moment, I dodged a water ball that was hurled at me, courtesy of Justine. She is screaming at me. I have no idea what she just said.

“Justine, you’re going to speak a little more coherently. I seriously didn’t get a word of what you just said with all that spit foaming at your mouth.”

“I. WILL. KILL. YOU.”

“Awwww...but I thought you had a crush on me!”

I lean back as Jacque swing his spear at my head. He missed me by just that much. I smile at him and dodge constantly as he does his weird drunken style fighting. OH! There are strawberry looking things behind him! I dance around him and grab a handful which I shove into my mouth. Yup, these are strawberries. They’re ridiculously sweet.

“Hey Jacque, are you drunk? That’s a rather impressive fighting style. Can you teach it to me later?”

“I WILL RIP OUT YOUR HEART!!”

“Well, that’s not very nice…”

“WHY WON’T YOU STAY STILL?!”

“Because I don’t want to get hit. Why else? Do you think the Contagions will stay still long enough for you to strike their cores if you demanded they stay still? I doubt it. And I’m waiting for the right time to knock you out. Gently of course. Well, maybe not so gentle considering I have to knock you out. You won’t have any permanent damages…I think. Sorry in advance.”

“Linds! Stop chatting with your opponents! Focus!”

“But he asked me a question!”

“You don’t have to answer him!”

“But then that is just…rude.”

“So be rude then!”

“Sir! Incoming! Watch out!” a random crew member yells out.

I look at Volt’s direction and watch him duck behind the doors as fireball is shot at him. Hahaha. That was not entirely unexpected. Looks like Justine is getting really agitated and probably had enough of my mindless banter with my brother. I should probably put a stop to this before she loses it. But first…

“Hahahahaha! Volt you dumbass! Don’t antagonize the players!!”

“Shut up, Linds.”

“Hey, why weren’t you yelling at me earlier for talking to Jacque? Isn’t that going to fuck with my concentration? OH! ANOTHER SANDWICH!!! SCORE!!! Oh shit!!!”

I hide behind a cabinet as Justine tries to hit me with a pot she threw. I grab the fallen pot and throw it back and hear a very hilarious ping that was quickly followed with swearing. I probably hit Justine. I’ll have to apologize for that later.

“Is…your brother eating as he fights Le Capitan and Her Highness? Sir, is your brother insane?”

“Yes,” both Volt and I answer the crew members at the same time.

“Isn’t it obvious? He hasn’t taken this seriously from the start. I shouldn’t have bet on Her Highness to beat him.”

“I had bet on him! You better make me some creds, hooman!”

“YOU ALL BE QUIET!”

“It’s ‘human,’ you racist mother fucker! I’m just kidding. I don’t give a shit how you pronounce ‘human,’” I call out. “But I demand a cut of your winnings! And Jacque, be nice to your crew!”

I grab a skillet that is within my reach. Good, it is clean and hasn’t been used today. That would have been bad. I’m going to use this to knock out Jacque and I would hate to burn him. He’s not a bad guy. Just an overprotective person towards his sister and his crew. Hell, his crew is even cheering him on as they shout words of encouragement. Although, I don’t know if that is pride for their captain or they just want to see me beaten up or if like the earlier shout outs, they want me to win them money. Doesn’t matter. I’m having a blast right now.

I dive over a flipped table and wait. Any minute now, Jacque is going to rush at me and try to hit me with his spear, well, staff. Whatever. I’m just going to say it’s a stick…thing. Okay. Patience. Be patient. Wait. Waaaaait.

“STOP HI…..”

BONG

“That sounded painful…Sorry Jacque. But, it did make a funny sound. Hey, you still awake. Hey!”

I snap my fingers in front of his face. Nope. He’s out cold. I hit him in the face a bit harder than I intended with the skillet. A little blood is dripping from his nose. Oops. Sorry.

“Someone come get your captain! He’s out cold!”

“Are you insane?!”

“Yes. I thought that was established earlier. Weren’t you listening?”

“Her Highness is still rampaging!! We’re not going over there!”

"Well then, on to problem number two. I just need to sneak behind her and whack her on the head…"

“Sir! Remember that your bet was that Her Highness will give up on her own accord!”

“….FUCK!!!”

That’s right. I did make that bet. Damnit. That makes things harder. Hmmm…

“Hey Justiiiiiine!!!”

WHOOSH

I ducked just in time to avoid getting hit by her wind which hits the cabinet I was hiding behind, slicing it cleaning in half. Scary…if that hit me, well, it would have hurt for sure. Oh, she’s flying now. And are those black flames on her wings?!?! And is her silver hair on fire?!?!

“HOLY SHIT JUSTINE!!! Your wings look fucking awesome!! And you have fire hair!!!!”

“Die.”

“Oh shit.”

I jump away as the black flames shoot at me. The floor where I was standing melted instantly. That’s…scary. Okay, she’s actually really pissed at me. Maybe I went a little too far with my teasing.

“Hey, uh, any chance you might want to, you know, give up? I could use the money…considering that I…you know, have none right now? And can you hold back a little? That black flame will probably kill me if it hits…”

“Die.”

“Didn’t think so.”

I roll to my left to hide behind a stack of trashcans as another jet of black fire comes barreling my way. Fuck. Well, this is going to be tougher than I thought. Although I could…

No. I’m not doing it. No. I refuse. No. No. No. I’m not doing that. Go away brain. You’re sleep deprived. That’s not something you would even consider if you weren’t so sleep deprived. You absolutely would not. No. No. No. No. No….

Fuck it.

I stand up with my arms raised and step out from behind the trashcans. Justine points her hands at me but does not fire her scary, but badass, black flames. Slowly she descends and lands on the ground. Fire is forming in her hands as I approach her. She does not move as she tries to see what I’m planning. Heh. You’ll never be able to know until it’s too late.

Soon, I’m face to boob with her. I’m only a foot away. Her hands are in front of her chest as she gets ready to shoot me. I look up at her angry, purple face.

“Tell me why I should not kill you now for the embarrassment you wrought upon me?!”

To answer her, I reach up and grab the back of her neck. I gently but firmly and quickly pull her head down towards me.

And then I kiss her on the lips passionately…which she accepts and kills her flames as she returns my kiss with an even stronger passion than mine.

Damn I’m good. Then I booped her on the nose with a finger. Boop.