I exit meditation, the answer to my large decrease of mana regeneration speed clearer to me. I always wondered why Summoners in fairy tales didn't summon a whole army of monsters and followers to do their bidding, I thought they weren't greedy enough, of course, I was wrong. Having an unlimited number of summons is impossible as there is a price you have to pay for each of them. There is always a price. Nothing ever can be easy, right?

The Summon Spirit spell can be considered as a different case, a contract is not implied in it. It's a summoning and binding process that the spirits are too glad to take. Of what I can infer is that to summon a unique being that you have contracted will extract a price from you. Maybe the price is a loss of a portion of your mana pool or like in my case, a part of my natural mana regeneration speed. To my understanding, there are several types and ways to utilize summoning magic. Then again, my understanding is limited.

The reason for my decreased regeneration of external mana is due to the summoning contract that was practically shoved into my face by Curite, Luxarch Curite, the name I gave to the black gold beast. Such a fancy-sounding name in the ancient language but with an equally silly meaning, The Glowing Darkness, literally.

All laughs and smiles except that the decrease of mana regeneration was more than half, it was too much. I agreed without thinking. In retrospect, I was able to instinctively 'negotiate' the price but I just accepted it outright. It seems I suck at bartering.

This mistake will hinder my training as I will need more time to fill my mana pool. Fortunately, I think that I am entering the age where the growth starts to speed up more and more, and as the mana pool grows thus also grows the capacity of gathering mana naturally so I will get to that level again eventually.

I would like to talk with another person with the summoning affinity to share knowledge, there is so much I would like to know and not be left in the dark. There weren't any serious books about Summoners back on the town or well, they weren't available for me. Likely that, there must have been, for a place so military-focused in magic. However, I am not sure but sadly that huge amount of information may be forever lost now.

My new handicap is not alone, I am incapable of summoning my new and first summon to boot. I tried and almost passed out from mana deprivation. The necessary mana to manage the summoning is too much, still out of my league for now. The headache I gained from failing the spell was particularly bad too.

About the spell itself, it's very complex. It's interesting too, how the entire matrix for the spell took form on my head, it felt as if it was something I already knew and was just remembering. Right now I 'can' only chantless cast it as I haven't immortalized the matrix as a reflex on my memory, and neither the strange phenomenon told me the Words of Power to chant it.

To my knowledge mages outside the city of mages, Erandel, are rarely capable of chantless casting magic as it is a skill that they acquire after decades of training. therefore I wonder if a spell like the one I acquired would be useless in their hands or would they be able to cast it regardless of usually being incapable of chantless casting? No way to know for now.

Even then, there are many things to be learned from this.

I think I start to understand why the Mingan didn't form a contract with me as Curite did. A summon benefits from the caster's mana to strengthen themselves but they are strong enough. And that without mentioning that they are pack animals and are less likely to separate from the rest willingly. Maybe I have better chances of bewitching lone monsters to my side than those from herds.

Even so, one summon like that is enough for now. More would just cripple the growth of my skills for a long time.

Carlos scurries towards me and makes small hops when he gets close enough. The meaning of this well known to me as I have seen it being played out multiple times. He is challenging — maybe — me to a little spar, either that or he has an itch on his ass. His species surely enjoys fighting. I get up and stretch. I have nothing to lose with this so I will humor him, it's not the first time we spar since that first bloody meeting of us.

We move to a bigger space between the trees. Sweating from every place on my body as today's temperature is not kind. I stare at my opponent as he walks around me as soon as the battle starts. I do the same and soon we find ourselves on a walking loop that demands a change. After fighting enough times with and against them they have learned that I prefer to avoid attacking from the front and prefer going for the sides so he is expecting me to move irregularly. I am doing nothing of that, though. I continue to walk as I chantless channel two spells and wait for my opponent to tire out of this silly movement we are locked on. I have patience and want him to move first.

A full minute goes by until Carlos is having none of it anymore prepares to pounce, probably not at me but to my side. Nevertheless, I am ready for it. I unleash the spells I was holding back, two being my current limit. Ghost Hand makes one of his hinds legs trip, getting a false foothold and being unable to charge, costing me a lot of mana in the process.

I was already upon him with an empowered jump and an Earth Lance, which I modified to not launch away, on hand, swinging it down like a club. The lance's shaft hits on the top of his head and breaks upon impact. The creature growls in pain and frustration and gets up, just to walk away in displeasure, probably considering that I already won the battle since I could have roasted him alive instead of hitting him in that moment of distraction.

Many battles are like that, no, almost all battles are as fast as that. Ending in the blink of an eye. It's good to win from time to time, but I am sure that were he to use his spiritual energy since the beginning I would lose ten out of ten times.

It took me long enough to identify the patterns that are responsible for launching the Earth Lance spell upon activation. Eliminating those patterns results in a still conjured javelin of hardened earth that lasts half a minute before the destabilization of the magic. The spell requires a lot less mana when modified that way. After identifying the ones responsible for the lasting time of the spell I can now increase the time to over several minutes or to make it so that it lasts as long as I feed mana into the spell, similar to Ghost Hand.

I succeeded in modifying the Gale spell too, changing it in the same way that the variant version of Flame I learned does to heat my body.

Now, what to do? The Mingan's ability? I have kept doing experiments on using external mana to strengthen my body permanently even though each failure is as painful as the first. I am surprised at my own recklessness and of my resilience too.

Since the first time I tried, infusing just a hand, I have tried every possibility that came to my mind. Doing it very fast, very slow, with a lot of mana, with barely any mana, to infuse just the skin or just the bones. All of it ended with me gritting my teeth until bleeding and wishing I were dead.

Now that I covered all the possibilities I finally thought that maybe my external mana and that of the Mingan are different so that is why I still can't do it. That is something that I should have thought about before doing those several painful experiments. I guess it is the price for viewing the problem from just one angle.

Fishing out a clueless cub from the group I sat and start to sense it after having reached attunement with the world. Right now I am not trying to detect the differences within the process as I already know it like the palm of my burned hand, but the differences between the cub's mana and mine.

Rather sooner than later I detect a difference and I can't help but think how evident it was. The cub's tendrils of mana are as half as tight as mine. How the heck did I miss it before?

I keep searching for differences a while longer and notice that the source of the thin mana is the mana pool, there is no modification along the way, the mana is already like that.

I let the cub go away and lie down, staying like that for a few minutes until I finally think of something coherent to say.

"Well, fuck."

xxx

I was a little upset for a while after discovering that the anomaly on the Mingan's mana comes from their mana pool but I couldn’t help it. There is not much known about our mana pools and I myself know even less. They are almost untouchable, only something like forbidden rituals can do just as much as to change a little bit of them and the most they can do is expand the mana pool or increase certain magical affinities and rituals tend to end very badly. It's practically uncharted territory, we have almost no control over them.

Manipulations of the mana pool are well out of my reach so it's fair to be mad at the world this time. All my effort, my time, and blood were for naught after all! It's unnerving, so much waste. The most I won from this affair was a little pain resistance. That or masochism. I don't know.

So, this is the risk that all researchers have always had stalking behind their backs? The fact that total failure may be at the next corner because they have been following a dead end? That's horseshit.

All this thing makes me reconsider pursuing the path of magic. Or maybe I could still be a mage but just get comfortable with the current spells I know? How hard is farming by the way?

With the orange sky of dusk illuminating me and my surroundings I lie on the ground, limbs spread all over the place, and sigh. It feels wrong to give up on my investigation of the ability this early. I need to at least try to make my mana thinner before continuing to whine more.

I sit again and clap heavily once. Let's do this, is just trying to do what can't be done. Not hard at all. With my mood down I reach for attunement and let the fun begin.

I start with taking control of my mana regeneration and continue from there. Trying to refine mana, or thin it out, or to will it to be different. To a smaller or thinner state and unsurprisingly, every time I am met with failure. I don't feel more disappointed than before, everything is as it should be. Regardless of failure, I continue to try to manipulate, to transform, to create. I fail. No one can say that I didn't try.

Almost giving up I start to imagine. To imagine instead of ordering, of willing, of doing.

I imagine small lines like blades that form a net just out of my imaginary mana pool to intercept the mana that is drawn naturally to it, one after the other, side by side and others too, crossing the firsts perpendicularly, leaving just enough space between them for a tendril of mana the size o the cub's to pass through there.

As never before while in attunement I start to feel weak, to feel hot, my head starts to hurt and my stomach feels empty. But I ignore it all as my attention is focused solely on my mana pool.

I draw in a deep breath.

To my disbelief, it seems I somehow managed to do it!

As I draw mana from my mana pool it now feels thinner, as much as the cub's mana.

I start to draw mana to do the process of the ability, which I named mana-reinforced body, just like I did before in one of my hands. I send my mana there, willing it to infuse the entirety of my hand and expecting pain. The mana arrives there and I just feel a brief unconformity. It's working!!!

With my mind feeling light I wonder, If I managed to thin out the mana that much why not cut it even smaller?

I start to imagine the blades forming the net that surrounds my imaginary mana pool getting closer and closer to each other, putting in it all the effort I can manage, and feeling more and more lightheadedness.

And then my mind remains blank.

Time passes. A second. A minute and several more.

At some point, without my knowledge, a surge of Intent washes over me.

I start to think again.

…

What? What was I doing?

…

Oh, I remember. I succeeded!

But I feel weird. I feel many things.

I have a faint sensation of many minds, like when summoning spirits, and I can vaguely make out a feeling of loss of control but also of gain in loss. I ruminate over it for a while but can't make any more sense out of it.

Putting that issue aside I put the ability to practice and feel as the mana starts to flow into my body, slowly, very slowly. I don't feel discomfort this time, I feel nothing at all except a change, something slowly changing.

Slumber tries to embrace me and I receive it, but I stop. If I am not around won't the process stop? With an effort of will, I feel half of my mana regeneration being redirected to this new purpose and as the mana pool is full now, all the wasted mana which is not expanding it, as it has a limit, is redirected to the mana-reinforced body ability too.

I chuckle mentally. I don't know which is more amazing, the mana-reinforced body or being able to arbitrarily redirect the regenerated mana like that. I didn't know I was capable of that.

My thoughts feel very taxing, by now I just want sweet relief, to rest, peace.

I had my eyes closed all the time now I just need to let myself be taken away to sleep.

Ah, so tired, If I were to never open my eyes again... I wouldn't mind.

xxx

But I do open my eyes right away, awakened by an immense pain in my head. A lot of emotions wash over me, mainly concern and panic. Right, this has happened before, those aren't mine.

I open my eyes. The Mingan and the others all around me, Curite too, I am lying on one of them as I hear the wind howling among the trees. It seems it's a windy night.

I don't feel as weak as a moment ago but my head is almost burning. A severe fever or something. My throat is so dry that it hurts and my stomach rumbles as if starved. I glance at my arms and body. I am in the bones.

I can feel my external mana still infusing my body without my intervention, so it worked.

My throat is killing me so I chantless cast the Water spell. I almost forgot it, I can drink water from my hand. Right now it's the best superpower ever. The spell feels relatively cheap on mana cost terms but I dismiss the thought, it must be that this night is very humid. After slowly drinking for a while I start to splash water over my face and wet my head. It's just so damn hot here but the water is not cold enough to be of much help.

Without another option I take a hold of my mana, willing it to cold down the water. It's dangerous, no way I would forget something that has been repeated to me a thousand times. Using wild magic can easily backfire or rob you of your control over mana permanently but of what use is my mana if I die?

Just from the simple task of purging the heat from the water without using a spell matrix, I feel my mana drain away to dangerously low levels as the water on my head cools down to a point where it becomes a thin layer of frost. A relieved sigh escapes my lips. Now I feel better and there were no side-effects, thankfully.

Now that I can think straight again, I can see that the creatures brought game for me to eat and as the snow melts down on me, I can feel myself quickly recuperating my strength. After a while, I am strong enough to half-cook half-burn the meat, and eat voraciously.

Just how much time has passed for me to have so much hungry hunger?

I check the clock I appropriated long ago and freeze in stupefaction.

Was I unconscious for two whole weeks?

How can it be? How did I endure so much? And... Why the heck did I not realize?