《Iakesi: They Call Me Homeless, but I Cast Fireball!》Chapter Seven: And Found
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It was night. For Gargoyle and Faerie Fire, it hadn’t been night mere moments ago. Gargoyle’s thoughts were groggy and scattered. What had happened? He was fighting, or at least trying to fight, the Wizard’s Guild. Faerie Fire had been helping with evacuation. They got captured by the wizards, along with some other woman. Then one of the wizards said…
He had said…
“Get Lost,” Gargoyle muttered. That wasn’t some kind of spell, was it?
Gargoyle checked the inbuilt communication in his helmet, Stone Cutter could update him on the situation. No signal. No signal? Stone Cutter had said the communication grid covered most of the U.S. Where were they?
“Faerie Fire!” Gargoyle called, stomping through the underbrush, “Faerie Fire, where are you?”
“I’m right- ow! I’m right here!” Faerie Fire said, pushing Gargoyle’s boot off her.
“Sorry about that,” Gargoyle said, “Any idea where we are?”
“Some kind of sub dimension controlled by the wizards?” Faerie Fire guessed.
“They can do that?” Gargoyle asked.
“I don’t know,” Faerie Fire said, working to stand up despite her dress, “They’re wizards. I figured they can do whatever they want. Oh no.”
“Are you injured?” Gargoyle asked.
“Huh? No,” Faerie Fire said, “This is a tailor made, designer dress. I was contracted to wear it for two days, and any wear and tear is taken out of my pocket.”
“We are in a jungle,” Gargoyle said, “In the dark, in a jungle.”
“Yeah, and there’s mud all over this thing,” Faerie Fire said, “At this rate, I’ll hardly get paid at all.”
“Faerie Fire, we’re stuck in some jungle,” Gargoyle repeated.
“Alright, alright,” Faerie Fire said with a fuss, “Just give me a moment.”
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Ethereal, blue fire rose up from Faerie Fire’s open hand, coating the forest in a pale, ghostly glow. With a bit of concentration, Faerie Fire shaped the flame into a ball that floated a foot from her hand.
“We’re going that way,” Faerie Fire said, pointing off into the darkness.
“And why’s that?” Gargoyle grumbled.
“Because,” Faerie Fire explained, “Staying here isn’t going to do us any good. We have no idea which direction to go, but any direction is better than standing here.”
“Can’t argue with that,” Gargoyle said, starting off after her, “Say, I’ve been wondering. Where do they get their money from?”
“What?” Faerie Fire asked.
“Your fans,” Gargoyle explained, “I’ve seen the price tag on some of your augmentations, and after a bit of math I figured that either your fans are living in poverty or they have way more money than they deserve.”
“Well, that’s a rude thing to say,” Faerie Fire muttered.
“I mean, they spend their money on you-” Gargoyle commented.
“Usually when people tell me that, they put “no disrespect,” at the end,” Faerie Fire said, spitting the “no disrespect” out like rotten food.”
“That-” Gargoyle said.
“And if you think they have more money than they deserve,” Faerie Fire continued, “That means you think I have more money than I deserve, since they’re giving money to me!”
“I just want to know how they get their money,” Gargoyle explained, “For the record, I think you’re hard working and put real effort in-”
“But you don’t respect me for that,” Faerie Fire said.
“I don’t respect you, but not for that,” Gargoyle said, “I think you’re being funded by super villains.”
“You what!” Faerie Fire demanded.
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“Where else are they getting the money from?” Gargoyle asked, “You know how expensive those augmentations are!”
“I know how expensive they are,” Faerie Fire seethed, “I was the one who bought them!”
“And how much did they all cost?” Gargoyle asked.
“They cost,” Faerie Fire said, rolling her head in thought, “Well, they cost a lot.”
“And, if you were only making twenty dollars an hour,” Gargoyle said, “How many years would it take to afford one? How many thousands of people are giving you thousands?”
“They’re not all just giving me money,” Faerie Fire retorted, “I put on performances-”
Gargoyle grunted.
“-And I have a merchandise line,” Faerie Fire finished, “Is that bamboo?”
“I don’t know,” Gargoyle said.
As Gargoyle and Faerie Fire strode through the woods, they wandered onto a path.
“Right or left?” Faerie Fire asked.
“Right,” Gargoyle grunted.
“Alright then,” Faerie Fire muttered, following after Gargoyle, “So, you don’t respect me.”
“For the way you dress,” Gargoyle said, “And how you fund your superheroine career. I respect your work ethic.”
“So,” Faerie Fire said, “You disrespect roughly two thirds of me.”
“I guess,” Gargoyle said.
“Well,” Faerie Fire said, “I suppose I disrespect about half of you. We’re mostly even.”
“Why do you-” Gargoyle asked.
“People!” Faerie Fire cheered, darting after them in her tight dress.
Realizing he was walking into a potentially hostile situation, Gargoyle ducked off the pathway and stalked after Faerie Fire. Setting his suit’s directional mics towards Faerie Fire and the couple, Gargoyle scanned the area for potential vantage points, look outs, or other people slithering through the underbrush. The couple said-
Well, they said something, and Gargoyle didn’t understand it at all. The only language he knew was English, which he had a loose grasp on. Then Faerie Fire, all smiles and cheer, said something. Gargoyle stole a glance at Faerie Fire, and watched as her smile seemed to brighten the whole world. The couple began chatting with Faerie Fire, the young man probably excited to see her, it could be a local custom, Gargoyle didn’t know. At the very least, nobody seemed to be hiding in the trees.
The woman said something, playfully punching at the man. The man looked bashful and said something. Faerie Fire leaned in close to the woman and whispered something, a blush spreading across her face. When Faerie Fire stepped back, the woman muttered something, and Faerie Fire nodded her head in affirmation. Faerie Fire continued to say something, then the man said something and pointed behind her. Faerie Fire looked back before laughing it off and saying something.
Faerie Fire said something, Gargoyle guessed she was asking something, and the woman said something and pointed down the path. Faerie Fire happily said something, waving the couple off. Then Faerie Fire looked around.
“You can come out,” Faerie Fire said, setting her hands on her hips with a huff, “What are you doing, hiding?”
“We don’t know where we are,” Gargoyle said, “I was checking the perimeter. Those two could have been hostile.”
“Well, I know where we are,” Faerie Fire said, her smile growing, “We’re in Japan!”
“We’re what?” Gargoyle asked.
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