‘There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life,’

— John Lennon

Chapter Nine

“Horror,” Kelly stated, “We have to see a horror film,”

“Why a horror?” Azelie questioned, a little confused with Kelly’s film choice. It was Wednesday and they were walking down the street to the cinema, Azelie shivering slightly from the cold. She was wearing a thick cardigan and a top underneath, coupled with a pair of blue jeans and a pair of high top converses.

“Because horror films are awesome! Please don’t tell me your one of those girls who screams at everything and watches cheesy chick flick things - because my mom forced me to watch the Notebook once, and I totally hated it! I honestly didn’t cry at the ending,” A grin stretched across Kelly’s face, as she ranted on and on. Kelly was wearing a simple oversized white shirt, and a pair of light blue skinny jeans along with her crazy pink hair

“I’m not, but Horror films are kinda crap these days! It’s the classics you have to watch! Alfred Hitchcock! The classics! Any horror film in black and white - those are the awesome ones!” Azelie replied. Horror movies definitely didn’t scare her, but that didn’t mean that she didn’t like to watch them. She was a bit of a film geek, and would over analyze every scene in the film. Kelly came to a halt, letting Azelie walk past her a tiny bit before she stopped to turn round, confused to why Kelly was no longer walking.

“SERIOUSLY? How are you not my long lost twin or something?” Kelly yelled in glee as she jumped up and down on the spot. “We should have an old horror movie night sometime! Both of the guys hate black and white films and just drive me up the wall with their complaining!” Azelie laughed at Kelly, rolling her eyes slightly at her friend as she began to walk down the street again.

“Sure we can have a movie night sometime,” she smiled in reply, actually glad you have somebody who liked old films as much as she did. She had tried to get Ted to watch a few of her old films but he didn’t really enjoy them. “But what film are we seeing tonight?”

“I don’t know! We will just have to see what the boys want to see when we get there!” Kelly replied, not realising she hadn’t told Azelie who else was coming to the cinema.

“The boys?” she questioned, a little confused.

“Alex and Cole? I thought I told you they were coming!” Kelly replied as Azelie began to shake her head, her brown eyes wide in shock,“Must have forgotten to mention it! My bad! I’m so used to people just knowing that Alex and Cole would be there!” Kelly answered, apologizing for forgetting to tell Azelie. Azelie sucked in a breath, wondering how she was going to cope with Cole.

Azelie and Cole had been working together in Chemistry for three days, and somehow managed to fight with each other about anything and everything. They had to set up an experiment earlier in the day, which had ended in Cole picking a fight with Azelie over how she was setting up the experiment, claiming that it was wrong; while Azelie complained that she couldn’t read the results because of Cole’s scrappy writing and that they now had to do the entire thing again. It had been a hassle, and she had begun to wish that Cole would just give up and let her work on her own. But he refused, always forcing her to work with him, refusing to go back on his promise that he wouldn’t let them fail the course.

“Heeeello? Earth to Azelie!” Kelly repeated over and over, waving her hand in front of Azelie’s face, bringing her crashing back down to reality.

“What? Sorry, got caught up in my own thoughts!” Azelie replied, looking over at Kelly.

“I said that we had to cross the road you dafty!” Kelly smiled in reply, Azelie only now realising that they were stood at the edge of the road with the cinema across from them. Kelly and Azelie crossed over the road before walking inside of the cinema, the smell of tasty popcorn hanging strongly in the air causing Azelie’s stomach to grumble slightly.

“Ah, they are late! I really don’t know why I am always surprised by this! They are always late!” Kelly whined, turning to look at Azelie. She simply rolled her eyes at her friend as she looked up at the screen that displayed all the films and their start times.

“There’s that superhero film playing, I heard that was good,” Azelie spoke, glancing over at Kelly.

“Oh yeah! The one with the very hot actors! Wouldn’t mind seeing that!” Kelly smiled in reply, her blue eyes filling with happiness.

“We are not seeing a film based on the fact that it has hot actors in it!” a third voice said from behind them, Azelie turning around to find Alex and Cole standing behind them. Azelie instantly looked over at Cole, noticing that he was also doing the same thing in looking at her, a slight smirk fully formed on his lips. He was wearing the same thing he had been wearing at school, just like the rest of the group was. He was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans, paired with a black hoodie and a pair of trainers.

“Just because you’re jealous!” Kelly replied, sticking her tongue out at Alex and pulling Azelie’s focus away from Cole. Azelie let out a slight laugh at Alex. It was obvious that he was completely jealous about Kelly finding somebody hot - even if there was no chance of anything happening between them and Kelly. It was clear he was in love with Kelly and also that he wasn’t very good at hiding it.

“Pah! I am so not jealous! I have my own six pack thank you very much! I’m much more awesome than any of those thirty year old actors!” Alex replied, smirking slightly over at Kelly.

“Yeah, yeah! Whatever! I believe you!” Kelly mumbled, rolling her eyes at Alex, “Come on, what film are we going to see?”

“Well definitely not the superhero one,” Alex grumbled, Kelly rolling her eyes at him in reply as she muttered something under her breath. Eventually Cole suggested a horror film about Aliens and they all just decided to go with that. They bought the tickets and popcorn before walking through to the screen and sitting down in their seats. Azelie sat between Kelly and Cole while Alex sat down at the end, next to Kelly. Alex began to throw popcorn at Kelly, who inevitably threw it back starting some kind of popcorn war while Azelie just sat next to Cole, rolling her eyes slightly. Cole turned to face Azelie, opening his mouth to speak when suddenly, the film started, cutting him off before he could start talking. Azelie thought about speaking to him but instead decided to focus on the film, watching the screen as the film began.

“Well that was a waste of money!” Kelly whined as they stepped outside the cinema and on to the main street, all four of them feeling utterly disappointed with the film they had just seen. A slight wind blew, making the night chilly but not as cold as it usually was for Azelie.

“Told you that new horror films aren’t scary!” Azelie smiled, glancing over at Kelly who was standing very close to Alex, leaning inwards towards his body.

“Don’t blame me! It wasn’t me who picked the film!” Kelly replied, slowly looking over at Cole accusingly, Alex and Azelie copying her as they all turned their heads in his direction.

“What? It looked good in the adverts!” Cole cried, trying to defend himself for picking the awful film.

“Sure it did,” Kelly replied, rolling her eyes.

“It did! I swear! Alex, back me up here! You were there when the advert was playing!” Cole shouted, turing to Alex. Alex looked a little bit taken back by being suddenly included in the conversation, Cole’s words pulling him out of the world of bliss he had been sucked into by being so close to Kelly. He looked at Cole, then quickly glanced back at Kelly then back to his best friend once again.

“I’m just staying out of this!” He replied, holding his hands in the air as if he was backing out of the conversation. Cole just let out a huff, angry that he was never ever going to live down his reputation of picking terrible films. Kelly rolled her eyes as she dug her phone out of her pocket, quickly realising how close the time was to her curfew.

“Shit! My mom’s going to kill me if I’m late home!” She shouted, her blue eyes wide.

“I can drive you if you want,” Alex offered, praying over and over in his head that she would accept.

“Could you?” she immediately questioned, looking up at her best friend.

“Yeah, your house is only a street away from mine anyway!” he smiled, his heart beating hard in his chest.

“Oh my god! Thank you so much, Alex! Wait.. shit, Azelie are you going to be alright walking home?” Kelly questioned, turning to Azelie, remembering that she had walked to the cinema with her. Azelie opened her mouth to tell her that she would be fine but she was cut off by Cole.

“She will be fine; I’ll make sure she gets home alright,” Cole spoke, looking at Kelly.

“Thanks Cole! See you both tomorrow!” Kelly shouted, smiling up at Cole before looking over at Azelie, a glint of happiness filling her eyes. Kelly had decided as soon as she met Azelie, to play matchmaker with her and Cole, and had made it her goal to make them a couple before the October holidays. Azelie turned around from Kelly, looking up at Cole as Kelly and Alex walked off to the cinema’s car park.

“You know, I’ll be just fin-” Azelie started, trying to tell Cole that she would be just fine walking herself home, but she was cut off by Cole.

“Don’t even start! I’m walking you home and that’s the end of that!” Cole cut her off, refusing to fight with her on the subject. He had enough arguments with Azelie throughout the past week, he didn’t want to start another. Azelie just stared up at Cole, her deep brown eyes searching into Cole’s as she tried to figure out why he was always so hell bent on walking her home. Rolling her eyes slightly, she gave up.

“I was only going to say that I would be fine if you had a curfew too,” Azelie lied. Cole looked at her curiously as he laughing slightly, shaking his head.

“You’re a terrible liar, Ryans,” Coe smirked. A look of anger and shock washed over her. She hated that he could see right through her smiles and lies, even though he hardly knew her. Was it that easy to see that she was broken inside? Or could Cole just read minds?

They walked down the street in silence, not quiet sure what to say to each other. Azelie kept glancing up at Cole as they walked down the street, trying to think of things that she could say to him. It wasn’t that she didn’t have anything to speak about; it was just that she didn’t know what to say to him. They both hadn’t really talked as such, and instead just bickered consistently.

“Do you really think that you aren’t scared of anything?” Cole questioned, breaking the silence between them. Azelie glanced up at Cole, noticing that his deep green eyes were on her. She thought for a moment before replying, nodding her head slightly.

“Yeah,” she answered confidently. He let out a small laugh, shaking his head slightly while looking back at her.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why do you think that you’re not frightened of anything?” He questioned, only now stopping in his place, Azelie looked up at him as she tried to figure out how to answer his question, deciding if she would lie or not.

“You know when you feel like you are living on the edge, like you could lose everything you know and love, or you feel like you are just going to...” she spoke, looking away from Cole and into the distance. “like you are just going to give up on life. And there is this fear that you could lose it all, lose your love, your mind, all you care for. I don’t feel that. I never feel that,” her gaze floated back up to Cole, looking into his eyes while his looked for answers in the deep depths of her brown gaze. They say that the eyes are the windows of the soul, but right in that moment, the windows to Azelie’s soul were boarded up, ready for a hurricane.

The sound of a train’s horns filled the air from a distance, the noise pulling Azelie’s gaze to the left, and landing on the road, only now noticing the train track that lay on the other side of the it. A smile crept on to her lips as a plan formed in her head.

“Come on,” she smiled, finally moving her feet as she crossed the empty road.

“Where are you going?” Cole shouted as he followed her, unable to stop his feet from following the girl he just couldn’t figure out. Azelie just ignored his question, her walk turning into a slow run as he followed her over. She ran down the slight slope until she reached the railway, stopping as she saw it. Cole caught up with her, questions running through his mind as he tried to figure out what the hell she was doing. Azelie looked up over her shoulder, looking at Cole and laughed slightly as she took in his puzzled expression.

Without saying anything else, Azelie turned back around, looking down at the rails, stepping closer and slowly laying down with her back on the rails, looking up at the clear night sky, the stars shining brightly down on her.

“Er, what are you doing?” Cole questioned, watching her as she lay down on the tracks. Was she mental? As a child, he had been told not to go anywhere near the train tracks, and now he was standing right next to them, watching somebody lie down on them.

“What does it look like, stupid?” she replied, lifting her head slightly to look up at him, raising an eyebrow as she did. “Are you just going to stand there or are you going to come and lie down?”

“What if a train comes?”

“Do you see a train coming?” She questioned, once again raising her head to look up at him. Cole slowly walked closer to Azelie, looking both ways down the train track to check for any trains. Slowly, he lay down beside her, still making sure that there were no trains coming. She then lay flat on his back, looking up at the stars. A smile appeared on his lips as he looked up. It had been a while since he had looked up at the stars, perhaps it was a little cheesy but he had really missed it. It reminded him of his mother, teaching him all the constellations his mother had taught him as a child. She had always been completely obsessed with stars, and it was something that must have rubbed off on to Cole.

“See, that fear where you needed to check that it was safe first before you even thought about stepping on to the rails - that is what I don’t feel,” Azelie spoke, her voice softening as she looked up at the stars.

“That’s not about fear, that’s just about common sense!” he replied as Azelie let out a little laugh, shaking her head slightly as she tried to figure out another way she could explain it, but finding that she was at a loss for words. Letting out a breath, she felt her body relax, tiredness from sleepless nights finally catching up with her.

They lay there for a few minutes, just in total silence, not needing to say anything else. Suddenly, the rails below them started to vibrate, softly at first before getting harsher and harsher. Noises from the distance filled the air, pulling their gazes to the left where they saw a train heading their way. Cole instantly jumped up from the tracks, fear pumping around his body as his heart began to thump hard against his rib cage. He turned around to find Azelie still lying on the tracks, still looking up at the stars.

“AZELIE! MOVE!” he shouted, but she ignored him. She stayed perfectly still, barely moving a muscle. Anybody would have thought that she was dead if it wasn’t for the fact that her chest was still rising and falling and her eyes were blinking periodically. The train grew closer and closer and Cole’s heart pumped harder and faster, but yet, Azelie did not move. Cole raked his hands through his hair, trying to figure out what he should do, fear paralyzing him to the ground, his brain screaming at him to move.

Suddenly, without thinking, he leapt into action, running up to Azelie, bending down and scooping her up in his arms before moving out of the way from the tracks, the train zooming by as he fell to the ground, still not believing that he had just stepped out in front of a train. His arms gripped on to Azelie’s body, refusing to let her go.How could she be so stupid? Why hadn’t she moved? A million thoughts rushed through his mind as he tried to figure out everything, the train still passing, the loud noise filling the air.

Finally, when the train had passed, and the noise had quietened, Cole looked down at the girl in his arms, still in shock and disbelief.

“What the hell was that?” he screamed, falling backwards away from her as his brain tried to figure out what the hell had just happened. “I’m mean seriously Azelie - how stupid could you be?”

“Cole, I-” she spoke.

“No! Just shut up! Why the fuck did you just lie there? What if I hadn’t managed to pick you up? Or if I got my foot stuck in the rail?” he shouted again, cutting her off as anger building up inside of him as the questions began to pile up inside his head

“Cole,” Azelie repeated, this time sounding a little pissed off that he had cut her off.

“That was so stupid! Why the fuck didn’t you move? You could have died! Jesus don’t you care?”

“Do you believe me now?” she questioned, her brown eyes looking into his.

“About what?”

“Not being scared of anything!”

“YOU ALMOST GOT RUN OVER BY A FREAKING TRAIN AND ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS IF I BELIVE YOU OR NOT?”

“Cole, for god sake, calm down! I would have bee-”

“Don’t you dare say that you would have been okay! You sure as hell would not have been!” Cole shouted angrily, losing the plot once again. Azelie took a deep breath in, looking away from Cole for a second.

“Sorry, okay,” She said. “I guess that was a little extreme,” Cole looked down at her, her words still processing in his mind. He let out a breathe, his mind now beginning to calm slightly.

“Never make me have to do that again,” He finally said with a sigh.

“Do what?”

“Save you,” He answered, “That’s the second time in a week that I’ve had to save you and if we are going to be partners in chemistry for this semester, then you really need to stop getting into so much danger! I’m not going to survive the year if you do!”

She answered him with a slight smile, looking over at him as she nodded her head in agreement. “I’ll try, if you answer my question,” she spoke.

“What question?” Cole replied, confusion filling his green eyes as he looked over at Azelie.

“If you believe me or not!” she answered, smiling slightly.

“Ha! Of course I don’t! Everyone is scared of something Azelie! Whether it’s mice, sky diving, needles, water, whatever! Nobody is completely fearless, especially not you,”

I am so freaking tired! Aaaaaaaah! :( I don't like being tired! I don't like it at all!