What is this feeling?

I dont feel empty nor do i feel fulfilled.

There is but a small void in the deepest crevice of my heart,

I hope it doesn't break me apart.

It's not as difficult as it felt years back,

Maybe emotions were more intense or self respect i lacked .

It hurt more that day or it hurts more today ,i dont know anymore ,

When u made me feel unworthy again and again but not once anymore.

I was foolish enough to think of your company as love,

Because even without it , it still feels the same , unloved!!!!

Those tactile ministrations which left tingling on my fingers, now crawls like bugs on my soul,

I felt incomplete without you but i forgot i was and am born as a whole.

Love makes you blind , deaf and dumb as well,

I wish it made me numb as well.

For i didn't want to be that hurt nor do i want now,

But then you were incharge and I'm in control now.

How stupid of me ,i thought you didn't know how to express what you feel,

Until i saw you fall head over heels for someone else which made my heart peel.

The vacuum in my heart you created is now my goal, To fill with courage and engrave these lessons in my soul !!!!

This is my first work and inspired from my one of the most favourite author .