"You Come In Waves" 🌊🌊🌊

I screamed loudly as I clinched onto BamBam's shirt tightly as the roller coaster sped in the air. Going in large hoops, and circles.

I don't know how Bam did it but he was able to shut the entire park down, allowing it just to be him and I.

He took what said the last night so seriously, after I told him I wanted to go on a rollercoaster he literally took me to one.

"Wow" I say as the ride was beginning to slow down meaning come to a stop.

I turn to BamBam who was laughing uncontrollably, literally almost in tears from laughing.

"It's not that funny. That was scary" I tell him nudging him.

He laughed harder unable to get words out.

Bam's and I night went pretty well after he took me to the amusement park.

After that him and I went out to dinner, like causal friends do. The more and more I started to hang out with Bam, the more and more I got to understand him.

What type of person he is. He isn't at all a asshole like I thought we was before. He's really sweet, and kind, and nice.

"You know... all of this.... today was amazing"

"I'm glad you enjoyed it", he says as we pulled into the driveway of BTS dorm.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I asked him and he turns to me, his eyes met with mine.

He chuckles before swiftly wiping his bottom lip with his thumb.

"You know when someone is trying to be nice, I don't think you should ask why are" he responds causing both of us to laugh.

"No. I'm serious" I pause nudging him, "I mean after all I'm just some girl who joined BTS, a boy band you are supposed to hate", I continue causing him to look at me.

"Why do you do that?" He voice and face expression was more serious then I have ever seen.

I arch my brows in confusion, "talk about yourself as if you aren't perfect. You aren't just girl, Normani. You do realize that?" He question me.

"no ones prefect"

"Well you are"

I look at him, I couldn't help but smile from ear to ear. What was this man doing to me, flirting with me constantly.

I rolled my eyes, smirking. "Thanks for today, I really needed it" I tell him gathering my things to exit the car.

"Don't mention it" he smiles softly before turning to the back and grabbing the stuffed bear he won me at the amusement park.

"Thanks" I awkwardly chuckle as he handed it to me.

Before I could exit the car he stopped me, "listen... I don't know exactly why your upset with RM, but whatever it is... find a way to past It. It's not good to hold grudges against people. People who you have to see and work with everyday" he tells me out of no where.

"I'll keep that in mind"

"Normani, I mean it. Regardless of what he's done... he's a good person. You can't be mad at forever, can you?" He asks.

He's right. NamJoon and I had to talk.

Meaning I would have to talk to him.

"Okay" I respond knowing there wasn't another way to respond.

"Goodnight" he tells me.

"Goodnight" I say back before getting out the car.

After exiting, I walked to the front door putting the code into the dorm into the pad, and the door opened.

I walked inside an automatically smelt the stench of pizza meaning the boys most likely ordered out again.

I shut the door with my foot, walking out the foyer making my way to the living room to see some of the guys eating pizza and watching television.

"Your back!" The youngest member announced causing J-hope, Taehyung and Jimin to look at me.

"Yeah" I smile.

"Want some?" Tae asked holding up his pizza, before stuffing it into his mouth.

"No. But thanks. I already ate" I tell them.

"Suit yourself. This is amazing. Mhm!" J-hope says before taking a bite of his pizza.

"What's that?" Jimin asked motioning the stuff bear, that I held.

"Oh, uh— Bam won this for me"

My words come out my mouth causing the boys to either make a expression or nod meaning they wanted to say something but they knew it wasn't there place.

"Oh" Hoseok responds before they all turned back to the television, forgetting I was even there.

That was until I asked them a question.

"Where's NamJoon, I have to talk to him" I say causing them all to look at me.

"H-he's in the... studio" JungKook responds.

J-hope turns to Jimin and shrugs, "Alright. Thanks. You guys enjoy your pizza", I tell them before walking away.

I laugh mentally before walking into my room, and placing my items down. I walked out the hallway going down the the studio.

I turned the corner, to notice the door was shut. He was speaking, most likely on the phone or on a vlive.

I swallowed my pride, and knocking on the door. I hear him sigh, causing me to slowly open the door.

I peeked my head in to see Yoongi and RM turned facing the door, I'm guessing after they heard a knock.

"hey. Sorry, I thought you were alone" I say awkwardly about to walk out the room, when I was stopped.

"It's fine. I was just leaving anyway" Yoongi says getting up and walking towards the door, with a smirk on his face.

I smile, as him and I past each other. I enter the room, as Suga exits and closes the door behind him.

"hey" I say awkwardly sitting in the chair next to chair that was next to RM.

"hi" he responds in a low tone.

I swallowed my pride, and ignored the thoughts in my head telling me to just get up and walk it this room.

But some how Bam was right. NamJoon and I needed to talk.

Before I could even get anything out he starts to speak, "I want you know that I have no feelings for her. Lisa was a very special person in my life but that was a long ago. A very long time ago" he pauses looking at my face expression.

I nod processing what he said.

"And that night of Seoul Awards... I didn't go to Lisa's room. I went into BlackPink room. Lisa wasn't alone. I don't know why she would imply that I did when I didn't. I only went to congratulate t— I cut him off hearing enough.

His eyes met with mine.

"You don't have to explain anything to me, NamJoon. I shouldn't have snapped the way I did last night, it was very uncalled for and unprofessional. I was just so drunk and very reckless. Not that I'm justifying my behavior or anything, I just know I was completely in the wrong"

I confess honestly causing him to look at me with confusion.

"So you aren't mad at me?"

"I don't think I was ever mad you, Joon. I think I more mad at myself. Because I allowed things to happen that should have never"

I wanted that to be a lie but it was true.

"Oh", He says worried that I'll say liking him or something. I was thinking about to.

"All I know is that I don't want us to continue like this. Being happy together then being completely different the next. I don't want our friendship so be ruin by something stupid" I confess causing him to look at me.

Wrong word. I shouldn't have said "stupid".

But now that I have I feel like weight has been lifted off my shoulders as I had felt that way for some time now.

"Stupid?" He asks.

That's not what meant. I meant to say useless or not smart.

"You know what I mean. If this continues any longer the outcome won't be good for either of us. We aren't just Normani and NamJoon. We are Normani, NamJoon, Suga, Jimin, V, Jin, JungKook, and J-hope. Think about the guys" I tell him putting the other members thoughts and feelings before Joon and I.

He nods, understanding exactly where I was coming from. The truth was I'm still unsure of my feelings about NamJoon. I don't know if I like him or if I like the idea of us being together because everyone else wants us to be so badly.

All I know is I can't just think about me. This isn't just a me anymore. It's BTS. What I do could effect everyone else.

Therefore if Joon and I had to remain friends for us to be okay then I guess that's what's going to happen.

"So what does that mean?" He ask wanting me to say the exact words. Did I really have to spell it out?

I sigh, "it means us being together, being something... anything more then friends... more then what we are now isn't going to happen.... ever" I say softly trying to explain it in the most non-harshest way possible.

He nods, and I could tell the discomfort in his face expression. He didn't want us just to be friends, he probably thought I was stupid for even suggesting this.

He can think what he wants but it's better this way. I don't ever want happening last night to happen again. I don't want to become this person I know I'm not.

"please say something"

I say realizing he was silent, and when he's silent it means he's thinking, meaning I can't know what he's thinking.

"w-what do you want me to say, Mani?" He asks. I shrug, I don't know. Just don't be so quiet.

I want to know what he's thinking.

He sighs before running his fingers through his hair, and standing up creating distance between us.

I sat up watching him stand in the other side of the room. "Why does it feel like your breaking up with me, and we aren't even together" he chuckles trying to hide his readable expression of anger in both of voice and face.

I don't know.

"are you mad?" I ask after a couple of seconds of neither of us talking to each other.

He turns to me, relaxing his very tense shoulders, "no." He responds in a low tone obviously trying to hide his anger towards me.

I was about say something when there was a knock on the door. "Yes!" NamJoon raised his voice obviously in annoyance and anger.

The door opened, and we turned to see Taehyung standing there.

I stood up from the chair slowly, as he looked at both Joon and I. "I know you guys are in the middle of talking but you should see this", he says to the both of us before walking out.

I confusingly look to Joon, as him and I walk out the room together, following Tae to the living room where the rest of the guys were.

You should of saw their faces when they saw Joon and I walk out together.

Joon joined Yoongi and J-hope who sat on the couch, I really didn't want to sit knowing whatever we were looking at wasn't going to take long, I stood leaning against the living room.

"do it" Jin tells JungKook who held the remote.

Jung-Kook presses the button on the remote and the television begins to play.

"is what I am hearing record?" An interviewer says. The camera then turns to another direction facing the members of BlackPink.

"yes. Set the record straight. RM from BTS and I are and will be dating" The words escaped right out of Lisa mouth causing my eyes to immediately jot at Joon himself.

His face expression was unreadable, I couldn't tell whether he was shocked or upset. This was news for both Joon and I.

I shouldn't care. But as much as I wanted to ignore it, I do. I literally just told Joon how is being together wasn't going to work, and now here I am trying not to get mad this whole confusing and complicated situation.

I notice Jimin turn to me, the room was filled with tension, the air itself. Thick.

"the lead rappers from both groups are back together" the voice fades as I try to block it out.

"This is... she's lying" Joon voice says in anger.

There would have to be a reason for her telling millions of people who were watching this that Joon and her were dating when they weren't.

The boys began talking about this situation amongst themselves. Jung-Kook turns to me, approaching me.

"You okay?" He ask me.

No.

"Yeah"

My expression on my face told him otherwise.

"Are you sure?" He asks, being so concerned about my feelings when none of what was going on had anything to do with me.

"Yes"

"Mani— I know— I cut him off, "Regardless what you think... this has nothing to do with me" I say loud enough for almost everyone to hear.

"This has everything to do with you and you know it" Joon says to me with anger in his voice.

"No. In order for that to be true, we would have to be something... anything other then friends. But we aren't", I pause causing the boys to look around.

"Therefore, this has nothing to do with me" I continue trying to control my anger.

"Well, what are we going to do?" J-hope asks all of us.

"We? We aren't going to do anything. It's not up to us", I say turning to NamJoon.

"She's right. Joon has to decide what's going to happen", Yoongi says getting up.

Either he'll agree or tell the media and millions of fans that his ex was a lying bitch.