Chapter 22: Sobs in the restroom

I woke up 15 minutes late and hurriedly took a shower. I dried my hair afterwards,and as always tied it in a pony tail. I put on my dark blue skinny jeans and a dark pink shirt which was not tight nor too lose. It fell just below my belly,revealing the piercing which I got last year on my birthday,my mom knew about it and didn't seem to mind. At first I tried hiding it from her but eventually she found out.

As I was about to have breakfast,I heard a car horn outside of my house. I took an energy bar and ran out,locking the door on my way.

Instead of Jess' car,I was met by a car I didn't recognise and James was seated in it,it must have been his. Wow classy, I thought to myself.

"Hey." I flashed him a smile.

"Hi..."He replied smiling back at me.

"Oh,I came to pick you up. Jess said she was gonna be late so I offered to come pick you up." he spoke and looked at me expectantly.

"Thanks." I said,going to the other side of the car and getting in.

"I missed you this weekend."he said,turning the key on the ignition and starting the car.

"You could've come by." I replied simply.

"I wasn't sure if I'd be welcome...after...friday."he took a glance at me.

"James...it's really not a big deal,I just-"

"I know. And I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable,it's just-"

This time I was the one who cut him off,"You needn't to explain,it's cool." I reassured him. Being friends with him was all I could do now,with everything that's happening in my life.

My phone rang,cutting off the awkward silence in the car.

"Hello..." I answered and it was my mom asking me if I was okay alone and if I woke up on time for school,I assured her everything was fine.

"Look mom,I have to go,will talk later,love you." I said and hung up,saving myself from her ramblings on what and not what to do,and how if I need anything I should go to Julia or Jonathan since they offered to take care of me.

"Was that your mom?" James asked and I nodded.

"So she's on a business trip?" he must've been listening to our conversation.

"Yeah,she'll be back on wednesday and if not,it'll be friday." I answered.

After that it was back to the silence but it was not an awkward one,just okay. It's amazing how things have changed because if it was back then,we would be talking non-stop.

We arrived at school to an already full parking lot,learners walking to their respective classes.

James offered to walk me to my first class,all this time not talking to each other,just smiling at him occasionally when our eyes met.

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"Good morning class." Mr Garner spoke,bringing the class to order. I was now seated beside Jess who missed the first class 'cause she overslept.

She kept smirking at me and then at Mr Garner,fortunately he didn't pay any attention to her.

"As you all know,we'll be writing a test today in order to see how well you know the subject. It's not a difficult test but a bit tricky. Those who perform poorly for the test will be assigned tutors who will assist them in improving their performance. So without any more waste of time,let's get started." he clapped his hands together,and started handing out the question papers. As he passed me I could feel myself wanting to get closer to him,for all this mess to just disappear so I could be with him.

He didn't even look at me,just passed me like I was like everyone else,but I guess I was.

After handing out the papers,he checked the time,"You have an 45 minutes to complete the paper,so start writing." he spoke and sat on his table,not at once looking at me.

I ignored the pain I felt and focused on the test.

As I went through the paper,I noticed just how clueless I was at chemistry,it was just a blur for me.

When I was on my last question,Mr Garner spoke,"You have 5 minutes left."

"What the fuck??"

I wasn't even aware that I said that out loud when everyone looked at me,Jess chuckled a little bit.

I was struggling terribly because I had skipped some questions and I didn't even bother answering others.

Mr Garner glared at me,his eyes narrowed and his jaws clenched.

That really sent a sharp pain to my chest and I felt like crying.

I looked at him sadly,hurt by his reaction towards me.

Unable to bear it anymore,I shot my hand up and he looked at me,"I'm done,could I please...excuse myself...." I said,my voice breaking a little.

He nodded and I stood up,handing over the paper on my way out,not bothering to look at him.

I stomped out of the class and ran to the restroom,not because I needed it or anything like that,but I just wanted to cry,I knew I said I wouldn't cry,but the pain was just too much.

I heard footsteps behind,but didn't bother checking who they belonged to.

I got inside the rest rooms and when I tried,shutting the door closed,someone blocked it.

By now,my eyes were constantly streaming with tears. Turning around to check who it was,I met Jess' concerned face. She hugged me tightly,and I started sobbing into her embrace.

Why does this hurt so much? Why can't life just be easy?

Love