I used to think that my life would follow me

That i would do all the things i wanted to

I told myself i would never end up like those people

You would see smoking a joint and drinking themselves to oblivion

But one day i woke up lying on floor

A bottle of liquor empty next to me

And a burnt down joint in the wastebasket,

and it is now the fifth night in a row

My head was pounding, my eyes were blurry

And the voices that had quieted just last night, in the drunken haze,

Were slowly getting louder, the more awake i got

I had this feeling inside of me

It was like i would burn up

If i didn't listen to the voices in my head

That were telling me i didn't deserve to live anymore

I could either grab that bottle and drown my sorrows ,

And again wake up on the floor with an empty bottle of vodka lying next to me

Or i could grab those prescription pills, the ones that were supposed

To help the voices and the intense inner pain.

I could pile those pills up in my hands, grab a glass of water

And take them all, lay down in my bed and hope that i never see the light of day again

I chose to take the pills.

With every intention of never waking up again, i pray one last time

The voices slowly get quieter as the rims around my vision began to go dark