《Camp Wisahickon》Chapter Thirty

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I leaned against the last bookshelf in the back of the library with my laptop resting on my knees as I scrolled through Juilliard's website. My letter- of rejection or acceptance, who knows- should be coming in a few weeks. Even though my parents were constantly jumping up in anticipation every time the mailman came by, I dreaded the arrival of the letter.

If I got in, then I didn't know what I would do. It felt like the same lifelong struggle between pursuing piano to make other people happy versus deviating from the path to find something that actually makes me happy. Last year, I had applied to a handful of schools without telling my parents, mostly on the West Coast, but some in New York.

If I had admitted that I wasn't putting all my eggs in one basket with Juilliard, that I wasn't truly committing to the arts, then they would lose their minds. For that reason, I paid the application fee myself and spent hours in the middle of the night applying to different schools in case I worked up enough courage to refuse my own admission to Juilliard.

"Juilliard, huh?" I don't have to turn to see who said it, considering his voice sent shivers down my spine. "You're still looking to go there?"

Cautiously, I nod stiffly. "The letter should come some time in the next few weeks."

Silence follows my words, and I almost think that Carter left, until he shuffles around to stand in front of me. I'm struck by the sudden emotion on his face as he looks at me with a somber kind of concern flooding in his eyes. My lips part and I stare at him in awe, confused by his mood shift.

"Amelia, we really need to talk," Carter breathes, his voice a little horse, and the sound makes my heart beat pick up speed. "What I said-"

"Excuse me," An elderly woman snaps and I tear my gaze away from Carter's intense eyes to look at the librarian as she scowls at us. "I can hear you two from up front. Quiet down, please."

To my surprise, Carter's soft expression twists into a scowl as he growls, "You can't hear without your hearing aid anyway, grandma. We're talking."

The librarian looks at Carter in absolute shock as she splutters, "How dare you? What is your name? I'm going to report you to the Principal immediately!"

Carter smirks a little. "My name is Jake Sloan. Go report me and I'll finish my conversation."

I watch in disbelief as the librarian scowls at him and scurries away to her desk, no doubt to report Jake to the principal's office. While Carter is chuckling at his own handy work, the warning bell signals, and I begin collecting my things in my backpack. He sobers up when he sees me about to leave, but before I can walk away, Carter grabs my wrist.

"Amelia," Carter's smirk is long gone as he looks at me seriously. So seriously that my heart trips over itself and I literally gulp down my words before I can speak them. "We need to talk."

I shake my head and lie, "Later. I have to go to class."

Carter's shoulders slump as he lets me go and I rush toward the front of the library. As I'm leaving, I can see the librarian talking to someone on the phone furiously behind the front desk and can't hold back the small smirk on my lips. Jake deserved it anyway.

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I suffered through the first few periods of school drowning in my thoughts, per usual. As always, there was a certain bad boy on my mind that I couldn't stop thinking about, and he occupied my thoughts during my first half of the day. I didn't see Georgina until right before lunch, when she stopped at my locker and grinned happily at me.

"Hey Amelia," Georgina leans against the locker beside mine. "You ready for lunch?"

I look at her tiredly. "Why are you so happy?"

She smiles at me and I freeze to study her. A rare blush crawled up her neck and her smile was- get this- shy. "I don't know. It's just a good morning, isn't it?"

"Georgina," I grin at her goofily as I realize the cause of her good mood. "Is this a Wes thing?"

Her widened smile gave her away. Georgina's eyes shifted to the passing students in the hall as she answers evasively, "Maybe."

I open my mouth to ask for details when a different voice calls, "Ladies," Joey grins at us as he, Carter, and the devil himself join us by my locker. "You heading to the cafeteria?"

I shut my locker and sling my backpack back over my shoulder before turning around. All three of the boys had the same aura of confidence surrounding them as they casually stopped traffic in the hallway and grabbed every passerby-ers attention.

"Gentlemen," I greet them, but only really look at Joey and Wes. "Let's go."

Wes falls into step beside Georgina and I purposely trudge slowly to fall behind Carter and Joey. I was all too aware of the promise I had made Carter earlier- that we would talk later- and I didn't intend on being alone with him.

I head to the cafeteria with my head down and mind racing with thoughts at a safe distance behind everybody. We enter the cafeteria and I can literally feel the weight of all the stares in our direction as we walk to our table.

"Amelia," An all too familiar voice asserts, and I freeze before turning around very slowly. "Can we talk?"

Why does everyone keep saying those horrible three words?

I look at Jake with a blank expression, thoroughly unimpressed by his attention. Before I answer, I glance away from him and see Carter standing there with his arms crossed and eyes narrowed at Jake. I felt a little smug when I turn back around and force a smile at Jake.

"Sure Jake," I practically chirp. "What do you want to talk about?"

Jake's gaze slides to Carter, who was still glaring daggers in Jake's direction, before it settles on me again. "Alone."

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Carter take a step closer to us, and his hands curl into fists. I smirked to myself a little because I knew how much this bothered Carter. I nod at Jake and agree with no intention of honoring the following promise.

"I'll call you later to talk," I lie to Jake with false sincerity in my voice.

I turn around and walk away, past Carter, and toward our table. Carter begrudgingly follows me with his face hardened and, for once, he's silent. His usual casual conversation in an attempt to get me to soften toward him was abruptly cut off as he set his lips in a tight line and sits down at our usual table.

I sit beside Georgina and silently get my lunch out of my backpack. Wes, Joey, and Georgina continue their conversation- about what, I'm not sure- and I silently begin to pick at my sandwich. I steal a glance at Carter and see he's texting with his jaw set and his eyes narrowed at the screen.

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I eat my sandwich while trying to throw myself into the conversation at the table, but the attempt comes to an abrupt halt when I hear the click of heels approaching our table. I lift my head when I see Gabby approach with a bright- and clearly fake- smile with her eyes glued on her target since the first day of school.

"Amelia," Gabby drawls in a highly pitched voice as she stops beside Carter. "I know you've been dying to introduce me to your friend."

Her gaze falls on Carter, whose brow is knitted and confusion was clear on his face, before she rests her hand on his arm. My eyes narrow at her manicured fingers as her hand slides from his shoulder down his bicep and she gives him a sultry smile.

"I'm Gabby," She doesn't waste any time in introducing herself, seeing as I made no move to do so.

Carter stiffens in his seat as he nods at her. "I'm Carter."

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you," She says sweetly and then promptly takes the seat beside him. My jaw clenched in annoyance as she crosses her legs and leans forward to showcase her very prominent cleavage. "So Carter, since you're new here and all, I thought that you might want to come to my party on Friday night."

I shouldn't care. I mean, Carter just watched me with pure contempt in his eyes as I told Jake that I would call him later. I tried to make him jealous while telling myself that I don't care. And yet here I was, filled to the absolute brim with jealousy because Gabby had her hand on his arm.

But still, I found my eyes narrowed at Gabby as if she were a glare from the sun and my hands balled into fists underneath the table. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Georgina sneak a look at me, but I didn't even bother hiding my annoyance.

Carter merely raises his eyebrow at her. "Are you inviting me, or my friends, too?"

She glances back at Wes and Joey, not bothering to look at Georgina or me, before smirking back at Carter. "The boys are welcome to come, but I want you to be my special guest."

I narrowly held back a scowl when her voice got lower in a failed attempt to sound sexy. My gaze shifts to Carter almost nervously, like there was a pit in my stomach as I anticipated his reaction, and I watch his lips curl into a smirk.

"Special guest?" Carter laughs at her and I pathetically feel relief wash over me. "Sorry, but I'm not interested."

A breath escapes me as my fists uncurl and my shoulders relax from his words. I hated the fact that I was reacting this way. That I still got jealous when other girls flirted with Carter. That I was actually relieved when he turned Gabby down.

I force my gaze away from Carter to look at Gabby as her grin drops before she tries, poorly, to smile again. "Are you sure? I'm sure we can have plenty of fun together."

I had to stifle a laugh. She was practically throwing herself at him the same way other guys throw themselves at girls. She was shameless.

"Positive," Carter's voice holds authority and his gaze shifts to me. His expression was hardened once again, his gaze so strong that it pinned me down. "I already have my eye on someone."

And, most importantly, I hated the fact that his words knocked the breath out of me.

Gabby snapped her wide eyed gaze to me and it steadfastly became a vicious glare. With a final humph, she got up from the table and stomped away from our table. My stare was still fixed on Carter's, whose electrifying eyes stared into mine, and I couldn't seem to look away.

"That was awesome," Georgina chuckles. "I hate that girl. It sure was nice to watch someone finally reject her."

Joey laughs too and adds, "Gabby is the worst. You dodged a bullet, man."

I tore my gaze away from Carter's with my cheeks flushed and I hope to the heavens that nobody brings up what he said last. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Carter finally look away from me and at Joey and Wes.

"You hooked up with her last year," Wes points out with a smug smirk on his lips.

"Yeah," Joey makes a face that resembles disgust. "And she wouldn't stop texting me all summer after I told her that I didn't want to see her again. Like I said, she's the worst."

Georgina rolls her eyes and comments sarcastically, "Who hasn't Joey hooked up with?"

He, however, just smirks and tosses her a wink. "You." When Wes' smirk comes clean off his face, Joey just smirks wider. "Want to change that, babe?"

Wes punches Joey on the shoulder quickly and practically growls, "Fuck off."

I was thankful for the conversation shift to bring attention off of Carter and Gabby. While it was cute seeing Wes get jealous over Joey flirting with Georgina, my mind was far too preoccupied over thinking things with Carter. For the millionth time.

Come to think of it, when am I not over thinking things where Carter is concerned?

+ + +

It seemed that by last period, something inside of Carter's head shifted, and he broke the silence with a text message. We didn't have music theory class today, yet he texted me asking if he could come over after school and we could work on the project. Half because I wanted a ride home and half because I wanted to get the project over with, I said yes.

At the end of the day, I was told to wait at my locker and Carter would get me on his way to the parking lot. My last class was on the other side of the school from my locker, so I was the first one out and sped walked through the halls. I walked through the halls with my head down for the most part, but looked up every now and again.

When I turned the corner to get to my locker, I looked up and slowed down. Gabby was smiling coyly at Carter as she walked annoyingly close to him. They were a few feet away from my locker when Carter stopped abruptly and turned to her, his expression deadly serious as he explains something. Her smile immediately drops and her face darkens.

I work through my daze and keep walking toward my locker, feeling an odd sense of satisfaction when Carter leaves her behind and resumes walking as well. He looks up and catches my eye when we're a few feet away and within a moment, Carter's lips stretch into a slow grin and he looks completely unbothered by whatever happened with Gabby.

"Hey," Carter greets as we step closer to each other. "Do you need anything from your locker?"

I shake my head. "No, I'm ready to go."

He nods, the stupid grin still on his face. "Let's go then."

As we pass Gabby, I raise my gaze to meet her full on glare in my direction, and I frown at her in confusion. What was her problem? I looked away and to Carter, who was looking ahead with the semblance of a smile still on his lips.

We make it outside about two rows back where Carter's Jeep was parked and I get the chance to admire his car. The forest green Wrangler somehow reflected Carter's rugged personality. I never thought about what kind of car he had before.

It felt like Carter and I were getting alone time in cars recently. More than I would like. So when I climb inside and he turns it on, I press the radio and change the station until I hear a song that I like. That wastes about thirty seconds while he backs out of his spot.

About two minutes into our drive, Carter mentions casually, "It's later."

But when I glance at his fingers that curled around the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were a faded shade of white, I can tell that he isn't casual. The mention of the little promise I made earlier practically slaps me in the face and I let out a discouraged breath.

At first, I try to play dumb. "Later?"

He spares me a glance that says he's clearly not amused by my effort. "You know what I mean, Amelia. We need to talk."

"And we will," I insist lamely. "Later."

Carter stops at a red light and lets out a breath before dragging his hand over his face. My eyes were steadily glued to the road the moment Carter murmurs, "Later. I'm holding you to that next time."

I bite my lip to keep myself from sighing in relief and nod. "Okay."

But of course, I was lying. I had no intentions of talking to Carter about this twisted situation we found ourselves in. Things were so strange and I hoped that if I try to ignore it, maybe it won't be so weird anymore. Maybe things will dissolve. Maybe I could keep running away from my problems.

The extent of conversation was Carter's lame, "This is a good song". To which I nodded and muttered, "Yeah."

From then on, the only noise between us were the classics on the radio, up until we got to my house. I was surprised to see my mother's car in the driveway when we arrived home and immediately went rigid. Not too long ago, I had my nose turned up at my mother with Carter by my side.

Now, I was bringing him home to work on a project. It seemed kind of ridiculous the way things played out. For obvious reasons, I didn't bother telling my mom that Carter Miller suddenly went to my high school and somehow we were put as partners in one of my music classes.

I turn to him and give a fake smile. "Guess who's home?"

His expression dropped and his gaze shifted to my house. I got out of his car and started to head toward my front door with Carter trailing behind me, muttering obscenities. I wasn't exactly excited either, buddy.

Maybe we can just sneak upstairs into my room unscathed, and I'll tell her that I'm working on a project with a classmate whose name I will not specify. I suddenly planned an anti-mom-seeing-Carter plan that I was going to stick with to salvage an explanation about Carter's residency in our neighborhood.

However, the second I push the front door open, I hear my mom call from somewhere inside the house. "Amelia, is that you?"

I hang my head low and let out a breath. "Yes it is. Where are you?"

"In the kitchen," She says, her voice less muffled now, and I push Carter him the steps quickly. "Working on dinner."

"Go upstairs," I hiss at Carter. "I'll be up in a minute."

"Is someone with you?" My mom calls from the kitchen. "Do we have company?"

As he scrambles up the stairs, I take a few steps closer to the kitchen door and say loudly, "I have a group project that I'm doing with someone from school. We'll be working in my room."

"Invite her to dinner. I have chicken on the slow cooker but I made too much." My mom explains with a sigh. "I'll call you down when it's ready."

I'm still standing in the hallway between the kitchen and the foyer and I don't feel like arguing with her. I'll just have Carter sneak out and tell my mom that my classmate had to go home to have dinner with her parents. Finally, I turn around and hurry up the stairs, wasting no time to shut my door the second I'm inside.

After I shut the door, I turn to face Carter, and I'm half relieved that he's sitting on my desk chair with his guitar in his lap instead of snooping around my room. Carter looks up from tuning his guitar with his eyebrows raised in question and I give him a wry smile.

"She invited you to dinner," I mutter halfheartedly.

Carter half laughs as he looks at me incredulously. "Does she know it's me?"

Despite myself, my wry smile turns amused as I shake my head. "Nope." I lower myself onto the piano bench and eye my song book. "Okay, we're almost done the instrumental aspects of the song. We just need an ending and then lyrics."

"I can do lyrics," Carter surprises me by saying gruffly. "We're getting an A on this assignment."

In an attempt to cover up the fact that I was a little shocked that Carter volunteered to be in charge of the lyrics for our song, I joke lamely, "If you don't fuck up the lyrics."

He looks up and his clear hazel eyes consume me. With that look, I suddenly feel horrible for ever making him jealous earlier with Jake and refusing to actually talk to him and hear him out. His eyes have me pinned to the spot, making me regret everything I've ever done in a last ditch effort to stop loving him.

"Trust me," Carter's voice is deep, precise, and laced with emotion. "I know exactly what I want to say."

Something in his voice shook me to my core so wildly that I had to look away. I cleared my throat and, after a moment, spoke. "So, let's finish the end of the song."

We picked up where we left off and, for some reason, it was easy. Working with Carter was so effortless, like we both agreed what sounded right and how to achieve balance with the two different instruments. We finished the conclusion of the song in under an hour.

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