Petra watched the monk walk away back to his hammock. This was the third night out of Goldhaven and it was the first time she had spoken with him. She worried that she could have helped him sooner. This had been the first night that he had woken everybody else up but the man never looked rested during the morning. Petra felt her regular trembling behind her eyes and in her chest. It was like a hive full of honey bees buzzing with activity longing to go and be about their business but instead they were stuck inside. She could try to go back to sleep but she knew she would not be getting back to sleep and laying awake trying to sleep was among her least favorite things. Petra took a deep breath and scooped up her stays from where they neatly rolled on top of her folded sarafan. She fastened and tightened them and took a deep breath feeling how they held her in. That was a little better. She pulled on her petticoat, fastened her pockets, pulled on her dress and belted it tight. She shook out her hands and rolled her head around her shoulders as she moved in place on her feet. She felt more comfortable now and sank down on the floor leaning against the wall of the ship.

She should write to her family. It was an errant thought. She knew she should. Somehow letters where even harder than speaking in person. If she wrote the wrong thing she could not explain it immediately or walk it back it would just be out there in the world for everyone to see and hate her for. “No, no.” she told herself. There was no use thinking of those things. She needed to stop, just stop, stop it! “Damn it Petrianna!” she heard the memory of the voice echo in her head. No, No, No! Why was she spiraling. She had just done her job she had just helped someone this was supposed to make her happy, this was supposed to keep the bad thoughts away. Troivda was leagues and leagues behind her. She did not have to think of it. “I do not have to think of it.” she hissed to her self. “stoping thinking stop stop stop. I'm Bad i'm bad i'm bad” she could not help the whispers from escaping her mouth. She heard a groan from one of the sleeping sailor. “shut up.” she thought to herself “shut up, shut up, you will wake everyone up again shut up stop thinking!” she clasped her hands together as her teeth chattered with anxiety. She had to stop she had to stop she had to stop stop stop stop stop! She stood threw off a shiver, not from cold, grabbed her shawl from her bag and went above deck.

It was early morning and dawn was beginning to raise. How long had she sat their just trapped in her thoughts. Petra banished the thought and focused instead on the memory of freshly baked bread dripping with butter and honey. The light of dawn diffused through the grey cloud that hung from the sky and the mist that rose from the water. She took a deep banishing breath. The air was what she needed. It was cool and wet and gently hung around her neck. She closed her eyes and smiled as she breathed it in. “Fresh bread, the frog rock, grey mornings at sea.” She smiled and thought to herself. She walked to the gunwale and leaned on her elbows she continued to breath deeply, pushing to feel the constraint of her stays. She lit a fire ball between her hands and lazily passed it around and over them. She closed her eyes and cherished the moment.

“Did you go back to sleep Petrianna, or have you stayed up” the voice came from her left. He eyes shot open and she turned immediately with a fire ball in her hand.

Sezjeck chuckled “You startle quite easily healer.”

“Nobody likes being snuck up on, but I never have to be startled for long.” Petrianna said still holding her ball of flame.

“You can put that away now. There is no call for it and there should be no more fire than is absolutely necessary on a ship.” Sezjeck instructed.

Petra nodded, shrank her ball and looked back out to the slowly lightening horizon.

“I am pleased to find you here I wanted to thank you for your help last night.” Sezjeck said.

“What do you mean help with what?” Petra was not accustomed to thanks and was also feeling a little disoriented in time from her anxiety.

"With Tornas, I know no one likes being woken in the middle of the night like that." Sezjeck replied.

"I am here to help people, that is just my job" Petra said plainly.

"None the less I wanted thank you personally. Tornas is a good man, a capable pirate. But he has his troubles." Sezjeck said,

"What are his troubles?" Petrianna ventured.

"His story is his to tell but the broad strokes are a difficult childhood in a monastery and an adulthood haunted by that." Sezjeck responded,

"I think you mean a bad childhood.” Petrianna said “Why say difficult when it is not what you mean? A spade is a spade and a fancy shovel is a lie." she concluded.

"A bad childhood then, as you say. Then he was with a gnomish woman for a while,"

"The bard?" Petrianna interjected recalling what Tornas had said.

"Yes. He won't say much about her but from what I can gather she was good for him." Sezjeck's voice was level and gravely.

"Then why are they not together still? Why would he choose to be here and not with her if she were so good for him?" Petrianna asked.

"He does not talk about it much but as far as I know something went very wrong with another member of their adventuring party and they all split up." He answered.

"But that doesn't make sense, why would they split up if the issue where with someone else?" Petrianna asked again.

"I can't give you answers I don't have. Like I said its his story not mine." Sezjeck answered.

There was silence for a moment.

"But speaking of stories, how does a Northern girl with fire powers find herself aboard a pirate ship bound for the Southern Continent?"

Petra was silent for a moment. She looked off to the horizon and rolled her ball of flame between her hands to warm them.

"People make a lot of assumptions about me. People that knew me when I was young, or know people who they think are like me. All of them think they know me but they do not. I am me, I am not their idea of me. So I decided to find new people." the answer was true enough. It did cover some of the reasons why she left.

"There are manny ways to leave home without joining a pirate crew." Sezjeck prompted

"Yes, there are" Petrianna affirmed.

"I do not mean to pry miss, everyone comes to the sea for a different reason and I haven't yet figured yours." Sezjeck apologized.

"Do not try to." Petra said flatly

"No I suppose not. Since you've made your reasons for leaving home so clear." he answered.

Petra nodded and continued to pass the fire ball from hand to hand.

Sezjeck looked at the small ball of flame. He had a thought, a theory he did not want to be right about.

"May I?" he asked pointing towards her fire.

"Of course" Petra said and held held the ball between her two hands and let it grow.

Sezjeck stretched out his hand and bathed it in the fire. The warmth reached under his scales and he could feel the magic of the fire in his blood. There could be no doubt in his mind. This fire was draconic. There were not any draconic gods worshiped in the north that he knew of which meant this girl either worship an exotic god or else was not a cleric. He found the later much more likely. He pulled his hand away his brass scales gleaming and burnished. He regarded her for a moment and then said,

"Well we should be going to see the captain. She likes to have the officers meeting first thing."

"Yes you mentioned last night but why should I be there?" Petra asked.

"You are appointed surgeon on this ship and according to its charters and contracts that entitles you to a quarter extra share of profits and are counted among her officers. Now we really should be going" he said turning and leading to the captain's quarters.

Petrianna followed him as he strode purposefully across the deck.