Art done by www.deviantart.com/erisiar

Lotte’s memories recoiled, throwing her into a scenery where she felt like she would never get used to. It was a dark and gloomy place. Rivers of muddy water and burgundy sand that was more akin to ash.

Enormous columns of stone sprouting right off the ground and disappearing into the starry sky which Lotte could never get enough of gazing at. No matter how much time went by her.

The carpet of stars wasn’t real though, it was but a ceiling which appeared as high as the real sky.

At first, she didn’t realise it but after one of the starry mists passed it became clear with all the hanging stalactites.

Sitting on her knees Lotte’s head would every so often tilt to her right where a vast staircase and seven stone gates lead up to the ceiling of the stars. By her guess it was a way outside of this cavern, but she never felt tempted to investigate it further.

It seemed so simple to remain sitting, waiting for nothing and admiring the artificial night sky.

Then a tall female figure came into her sight, taller in height than any person she knew. Standing as tall as five metres and she was approaching Lotte with a careful gait.

Lotte’s eyes lingered at the woman’s beautiful figure, the skin and ancient robe coloured in the same burgundy hue as the sands and stones around them. A set of golden jewellery on her wrists and neck adored her body finishing it up with a golden crown twisting and intertwining on her head.

A pair of downcast wings flapped from her back and with her set of owl-like feet she gently whirled up the sand when she walked. One young female gazelle would snuggle up to her dark legs and on the other side was a gorgeous young woman with a stone tablet in hand with unnatural golden hair and brass skin. She was more than half the size of her mistress but still taller than Lotte.

Not trying to gawk any further Lotte pushed herself up from her position, out of courtesy and awe for the giant woman. She watched as the queen’s long and wavy dark hair flowed over her collarbone and extended a hand towards Lotte.

A simple smile on her face, so beautiful and caring, like a mother greeting a lost child.

Amidst this entirely inhospitable place she was like a gloomy star. The only source of light one could feel drawn to in this desolate and inhospitable place.

Before she could introduce herself, Lotte awoke from her trance.

A seemingly never-ending dream being put on hold. Shaken awake by one particular voice, belonging to a very important person in her life.

“Wake up, sleepyhead or you will sleep through the whole break.”

An obvious smile formed on Lotte’s face which was quickly covered by the paperback that she previously tried to read. Her silvery eyes glanced over to Liara, her best friend.

And the only person who could make her heart and stomach flutter.

“Who are you calling sleepyhead? I honestly don’t feel in the mood to go to our club activities today.” Lotte tried to nestle herself back to the warm earth and dancing grass beneath her where the shade of the tree was covering them. “It’s so much today and I feel comfortable right where I am.”

“But we’ve got archery today.” Liara protested, pulling her knees up to her chest. “Don’t you like archery?”

“I do,” confirmed Lotte, “But we also had track this morning. Tomorrow we will have swimming classes and then pole fighting,” Liara sat down next to Lotte, swiping away any loose grass on their uniforms. “Do I also need to remind you about the ethics and religion mock exams at the end of this week?”

“Ok, yeah, I see your point,” admitted Liara, looking over to the archery field nearby. “But we could go there early. I know how much you dislike changing in front of everyone.”

“I- I don’t really hate it- I mean,” Lotte’s mind was in a daze as she mumbled underneath the book. She was simply uncomfortable about it. Feeling like she would peep on them every time her gaze was falling on them.

Liara was eventually able to convince her. “Let me fix your hair, come to the mirror,” took care of her friend’s hair which was a smooth shade of midnight blue, flowing down like waves and stopping right between her shoulder blades.

She almost looked identical to her mother with their hair and light brown skin but was taller than her by at least a head. One of the few things like her eyes she genetically inherited from her father.

“And done, I believe it’s one of my finest works, don’t you agree?” Liara put her hands on her hips, admiring the very messy bun though Lotte didn’t complain. She liked it the way Liara did it.

“Now help me with mine,” Liara twirled around her heel, facing Lotte with her back. She was always the smaller one of them, even during puberty. Lotte’s hands glided over her bare neck, fixing her short hair as quickly as she could. There was enough time to make it properly but not enough for Lotte to endure it.

Unable to hide her red face afterwards.

To everyone they were like best friends but for Lotte it was a bit different. She always wished for more. However, she also knew it wouldn’t be allowed nor does she know how Liara would react or feel about it.

Would she accept her for who she was? Would she deny her? The possibilities and insecurities make Lotte stiffen up. After all, losing her best friend would be worse.

—☾—

“Let’s see,” Liara fired her bow and the arrow hit the inner blue circle for six points. She looked indifferent about it despite the fact that she and Lotte agreed, as per usual, on a bet for who would get the most points.

Lotte would win either bet for most of their club activities. Especially pole fighting, archery or track. Normally it was simply deciding on who would buy lunch for the day.

“The loser has to,” Liara started, and Lotte was readying her bow, aiming to hit the inner golden circle for 10 points when, “Reveal her biggest secret to the other.”

“Huh?” Lotte shot and turned to Liara who stood there with a wide joyful grin as she had taken her friend off guard.

Panic overwhelmed Lotte for a moment. She couldn’t tell Liara about her feelings, not yet.

“Hey William Tell!” The trainer yelled. “You get 28 points for this but please pay more attention when you shoot!” The trainer huffed and left, throwing her hat aggressively to the ground.

“Practice was fun today, wasn’t it?” The two friends headed to their last class with Lotte still trying to process the initial shock from before. She had almost lost the bet from being carelessly thrown off guard.

“You know that was dangerous what we just did? Shooting an arrow without looking? This was too irresponsible!”

“Well, you did it, I was just the support,” Liara laughed it off and Lotte had a hard life trying to suppress her own laugh.

In no club activity or class would Lotte show any sort of enthusiasm, appearing like a stoic and unapproachable person but after she had met Liara it all changed. She was the sole reason Lotte could enjoy anything in school or the burden of expectations from her parents.

Since they first met by sheer coincidence Liara was there for her.

“So,” Lotte sat down with Liara at the far end of the classroom, empty of any student or teacher. “What is the secret you plan to tell me?”

“Hmm.” A smile creeps up on Liara’s face, a dubious one as she locked her eyes with Lotte and leaned on the table. “Do you mind telling me what you were reading today?” Liara points at Lotte’s paperback peeking out of her bag. The same one she was trying to read during break.

“‘The Epic of Gilgamesh’, a poem? Didn’t know you were into poems nowadays,” Liara skimmed through Lotte’s book, not really paying any proper attention to its contents.

“You are trying to change the topic but to be precise, it’s an epic poem,” Lotte corrected her. “There’s a distinct difference between a normal poem and an ancient one. You know that, stop pretending.”

“Ok, ok”, Liara closed the book and shifted with her chair closer to Lotte, whispering something into her ear. “You should watch out when you bring it to school or read it at home. Books like these are a bit of a touchy subject.”

“W-what do you mean?” The both of them were now whispering though Lotte felt a bit flustered by how close Liara was. She should have noticed that she was making Lotte uncomfortable but came closer anyway.

“Did you know they call this Epica one of the first gay poems ever written?”

Lotte choked, losing her breath on what Liara just said.

She tried to deny that idea but going through her memories she recalled some of the scenes and began to see the point. Some of them depicted how passionate and affectionate the two protagonists were. With Gilgamesh once mentioning that he loved his friend like he would love a wife or in another scene they would cuddle with each to keep warm during the night before fighting the terrifying monster Humbaba.

“You are reading too much into it!” Liara tried to make a counter argument but failed to whisper back and feared someone might have heard her.

Thankfully there was no one here yet.

“It was a different time back then and there are passages saying how he had called him a brother. It definitely was a love shared between friends. He even said that he was and would be his one and only friend even after his death,” Lotte, much quieter now, tried to make a rebuttal but instead she sounded almost desperate to prove a point.

“Sounds about right,” Liara put the book back into Lotte’s bag, dropping the topic and talking more casually now. “Realistically speaking it could also be a convenient interpretation for those who want to believe it a certain way. Same thing when someone reads an online novel and overanalyses all the released chapters and comes up with a conclusion, they like the most. For instance, relationships between two characters.

“Besides,” Liara shrugged. “Who can actually tell how it really was? History can never be conveyed to the next generation as accurately as we wish it to be. Facts and details get lost or change over the course of time. Maybe we are interpreting too much into it or we interpret correctly without knowing it” Liara winked at Lotte playfully, embarrassing her further. “Class is about to start, better hide your book before our teacher gets wind of it.”

Noticing the other students coming in one after class really was about to start. Frantically Lotte hurried to try and find where she had put her book before realising Liara already had put it back for her.

“Don’ forget to lend it to me sometime. You know I love history as much as you do,” Liara whispered into Lotte’s ear again and laughed, leaving her flustered in front of the other students. “Especially those where others like to interpret a deep relationship between the two main characters.”

Blithely Lotte hit lightly with her fists against Liara’s chest, complaining to her to stop always playing with her like that. They laughed, albeit one of them with a red face. Not out of embarrassment but joy.

“Alright girls and boys,” the teacher announced his presence with a pang of his books on the table. “Let’s cease all laughter, especially the girls in the last row. Today we talk about what happened 16 years prior on June 1st and what kind of mistake it was on our society.”

Lotte’s smile dropped, again, like in any other day, the teachers of the school will pound their biased opinion into their students. Recognizing topics they hate as wrong so everybody else would hate them too.

Lotte would listen and nod along, enduring it all while feeling awfully drained by it.

Neither at home nor in school could she feel at ease. There was no place she was feeling comfortable in.

“Hey, want to play hangman?” Liara slid her open notebook over. “I will give you a hint. A person that makes you happy.”

Pretending to have been deep in thought Lotte looked over to Liara. “Does it start with the letter ‘L’?” Responded Lotte with a hint of seriousness in her voice.

“Yes! Four letters left, it’s gonna take a while till something interesting happens. Let’s distract ourselves. Also, the secret I planned to tell you was that you are my best friend,” Liara’s smile covered her whole face.

Trying to contain a chuckle, Lotte smiled back at her. After all, she really was the only person to make her happy when she was dispirited.

Even if they were just friends, they were best friends. It was something she wouldn’t want to give up on as long as she lived.

Character Profiles

Name: Charlotte “Lotte” Mae

Age: 16 ; Height: 173 cm ; Gender: Female

Friends: Liara Shepard

A girl who is in love with her best friend but holds back on expressing her own feelings in fear of rejection. Loves her parents despite the fact they give her a hard time.

Hobbies: Pole Fighting, Archery, History, Languages, Fantasy

Likes: Grapes, Reading, Languages, Liara, stargazing, ancient history, Cereal with Fruit

Dislikes: Stress, club activities, her teachers

Ethnicity: Mother is from Oceania, Solomon Islands and the father is Norwegian.