《The Three Lives of Mr. Amazing》Miss Purple
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‘Can I speak to Mr. White?’ - said a voice on the phone.
Baxter froze for a moment - and a wave of adrenaline washed over him.
‘Speaking’
‘You have it all?’ - said the voice on the phone.
‘Yes’
‘How much?’ - said the voice on the phone.
‘15’
There was a long silence, and then the voice on the phone spoke.
‘A car will be coming. It will be outside your apartment building in 30 minutes. Be waiting on the sidewalk with the money. When the car arrives a man will approach you and take the money. You will get in the back seat and follow instructions. You understand?’
‘Yes’
‘30 minutes, Mr. White - be on the sidewalk and have the money with you’ - said the voice over the phone, and then they were gone.
Baxter stared into space for a moment, and then came back to the moment. He went to the room, and unlocked the door and slipped inside, locking the door behind himself.
He had placed the ad in The Post’s lonely heart section two days ago - “Mr. White is looking for his Miss Purple” - and the last 48 hours had been an anxious agony. He was distracted at work, and couldn’t focus on anything he was doing. He was constantly checking his phone, and couldn’t sleep. The events at the Marazzis were even forgotten.
He had canceled a game of racquetball because he was worried about not being near his phone - in case they rang, and had hardly eaten anything.
He stood and stared at the aluminum Zero Halliburton suitcase sitting in the middle of the mini museum. It had $15,000,000 inside of it. He was about to hand over everything he had to strangers - strangers he had met on a black market marketplace who offered superhero gene therapy.
It’s a fucking scam, it has to be - he had told himself hundreds of times - thousands of times - over the last 48 hours. He was going to hand over $15,000,000 to a bunch of scammers and that was the last he would see of his money, and they would drive him out into the boonies and shoot him through the head and bury him in a shallow grave and that would be that. He stared at the aluminum suitcase.
But what if they weren’t scammers - what if this was real? What if he would hand over his $15,000,000 and they would treat him with the P-S-I package, and he would become powerful, and fast, and intelligent. What if it was real?
He pulled out the handle on the suitcase, and wheeled it to the door. He stopped and looked at a framed poster of Mr. Amazing on the wall - Mr. Amazing was standing on the body of a dead Russian soldier and was holding a golden sickle in one hand, and a golden hammer in the other that were dripping with blood. The banner above Mr. Amazing said in bold letters “CФMMUИISM SUCКS!”
Baxter unlocked the door, and wheeled the suitcase out - locking the door behind him. He wheeled the suitcase to the lobby, and slipped on his coat.
‘Where are you going?’ - a voice said behind him. It was Cheryl.
‘Oh, hey sweetie - I was just heading out for a - for a meeting’
Cheryl was staring at the suitcase.
‘What kind of meeting?’
Baxter looked at Cheryl, and tried to smile but he just looked weird and guilty.
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‘I am - I am selling my collection’
Cheryl continued to stare at him. They stood in silence for a while.
‘I was thinking about what Giancarlo said - and I think it is time I put all of this behind me…’ - said Baxter.
Cheryl walked towards him, and placed a hand on his chest.
‘Thank you, Baxter’
Baxter smiled - ‘I want to concentrate on us. On you, from now on - and, as Giancarlo said - finding my inner primitive self’
Cheryl kissed him on the lips - ‘Where is the meeting?’
‘Oh, it is in…’ - Baxter tried to think on his feet - ‘It is in New Jersey, a collector - wants to buy the whole lot. I am taking him a sample of some of the items, so that he can have a look and then he will make an offer’
Cheryl smiled - ‘What time will you be home?’
‘Late - I should think’ - said Baxter, smiling again.
“Maybe you could take a bit of vacation - and we could head down to Miami for a few days, and we could concentrate on us, and your erection’ - said Cheryl, kissing him again.
He smiled - ‘Yes, that sounds great’
Another moment of silence.
‘I gotta go - I don’t want to be late’
‘Okay’ - said Cheryl, smiling and stepping back.
He grasped the aluminum suitcase by the handle, and smiled at Cheryl, and then walked to the door. He headed down the hallway to the elevator and pressed the button.
What would Cheryl think if she knew the truth - he thought. That he had mortgaged and borrowed everything they had so that he could give $15,000,000 to a bunch of strangers he met on a black market marketplace so that he could try to be a little bit like him. Just a little bit like Mr. Amazing. So that he could fight crime - stop a mugger and bring some justice to the world. To be powerful - like Mr. Amazing. Cheryl would think he had gone mad - that he had gone completely insane. She would be devastated and heartbroken - she would leave him. But what if they were scammers - how would he explain the debts. The $5,000,000 borrowed from the family trust. The loan against the apartment. The mortgage on the beach house. All of their money gone - and nothing left but millions in debt. Baxter looked at the aluminum suitcase. His entire lift was inside that suitcase - everything he was was in that suitcase. At first he thought that Mr. Black was the cops. But now he was sure that whomever he was dealing with were scammers - who were going to rob him of his money and everything he had. But it was worth it. It was worth the risk of losing it all if there was a slight chance that he could be a little bit like Mr. Amazing.
The elevator doors opened, and he wheeled the suitcase in and pressed the button for the lobby. He was calm. The doors opened and he wheeled the suitcase out into the lobby. The doorman, Bernie, was standing by the desk and smiling.
‘Good evening Mr. McGill - you going on a trip?’ - said Bernie, hurrying over to help Baxter with the suitcase.
‘Good evening Bernie - that won't be necessary’ - said Baxter, switching hands on the suitcase handle and putting himself between everything he owned and the smiling doorman.
‘You want me to get you a cab, Mr. McGill?’
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‘No thank you Bernie - I am meeting someone’
‘Right you are Mr. McGill’ said Bernie, opening the door to Park Avenue.
Baxter smiled as he passed Bernie, and then wheeled the suitcase out into the cold night air. Baxter looked at his watch. He had 15 minutes to wait. Baxter looked at the faces of the people walking past the entrance to his building. There were men in suits and smart woolen coats. There were women in furs. There were delivery men - dropping off food.
‘Hey buddy’ - said a man.
Baxter jerked his head to the left - and saw a man with an unshaven face and a worn out and tatty coat.
‘You got a cigarette, buddy?’ - said the man.
Baxter gripped the handle of the suitcase tighter. He could smell the fumes of booze coming from the man, and the rancid smell of urine.
‘I am sorry, I don’t smoke’ - said Baxter, his face stiff and tight.
‘What about a few bucks - you got a few bucks for man down on his luck?’ - said the man.
‘I am sorry’ - repeated Baxter - ‘I don’t have any money on me’
That man had already lost interest - he knew the answer to the question before he had even asked it. The man shuffled away looking for the next person to ask for a cigarette or a few bucks.
Baxter checked his watch - and then a car pulled up outside his apartment. Baxter stared at the car.
‘Mr. White?’ - said a voice.
Baxter turned his head slowly to the right, and a man wearing a black leather jacket was standing there. Baxter nodded - new adrenaline coursing through his body. The man held out a hand. Baxter felt his grip on the suitcase lessen. He panicked for a moment and his grip tightened again on the suitcase handle - and thought about heaving the suitcase away and hurrying back into his apartment. The man stared at him - his hand extended. And then Baxter relaxed his grip, and let go of the handle and the man took the suitcase and turned and walked away.
Baxter stared at the car. He hesitated for a moment, and then walked towards it. He opened that rear door, and climbed into the seat - closing the door behind him. The driver said something into a phone, and then hung up. He turned to Baxter and held a Faraday pouch open.
‘Phone in here’ - said the driver.
Baxter took his phone from his pocket, and placed it in the pouch that the driver closed up. The driver then handed him a white pill, and a bottle of water. Baxter took the pill and the bottle of water, and stared at them. They sat in silence for a moment.
‘You take the pill’ - said the driver - ‘Now!’
Baxter placed the pill in his mouth, and unscrewed the cap of the bottle. He could see the driver watching him in the rear view mirror. Baxter put the water bottle to his lips, and then filled his mouth with water and the pill went down his throat. The driver put the car in gear, and pulled away.
They were heading south on Park Avenue, and Baxter looked straight ahead of him as they turned and headed east. By the time they were on Lexington Avenue, Baxter was feeling hot and woozy. The last thing Baxter remembered was the Queensboro Bridge ahead of him - and then he passed out.
***
‘He is coming round’ - said a voice.
He opened his eyes, and blinked. His head felt thick and groggy. HIs vision was blurred and he couldn’t focus. He tried to move, but he couldn’t.
Baxter McGill was naked - and strapped into a contraption that held him in place in a seated position. Baxter’s head was shaved. He blinked - and tried to move, but it was futile.
‘Everything is set, doctor’ - said another voice.
Baxter could see a blurred figure ahead of him. He blinked his eyes again - and the figure came into focus. It was a woman - she was wearing hospital scrubs and was reading through a chart.
‘Where…am…I…’ - said Baxter, drool hanging from his mouth.
The doctor handed the chart to another person, and approached Baxter.
‘How are you feeling Mr. McGill?’ - said the woman, shining a pen light in Baxter’s eyes.
‘Who are you?’ - said Baxter, straining against the restraints.
‘My name is Miss Purple - and I understand you are looking for me’ - said the woman, stepping back and smiling at him.
‘What is happening?’ - said Baxter, his eyes straining to see where he was.
‘P-S-I’ - said the woman.
Baxter was panicking - he was breathing deeply and sweating.
Miss Purple was Dr. Janus.
‘I have changed my mind - I don’t want to do this’ - said Baxter, now fully panicking.
Dr. Janus smiled at him - ‘It’s too late for that, Mr. McGill’
‘Let me go - I don’t want to do this. Please, I have changed my mind. Just let me go and give me my money back and I will forget all about this’
‘You will forget all about this’ - said Dr. Janus - ‘And we will be letting you go, but we will still be doing the procedure and we will be keeping the money, Mr. McGill’
‘Please -keep the money. Please - I don’t want to do this. I just want to leave - please’ - Baxter was snow crying, snot dripped from his nose and tears ran down his face.
Dr. Janus walked around Baxter McGill, and sat down behind him. Three areas of Baxter’s spine had been marked. Dr. Janus picked up a large syringe filled with a clear liquid - and she pushed the needle into Baxter’s skin.
Baxter screamed.
‘Primary epidural administration sequence initiated’ - said Dr. Janus.
‘Yes doctor’ - said an assistant, watching intently.
Dr. Janus pushed down on the syringe, and the clear liquid flowed into Baxter’s spinal column. When the syringe was empty - Dr. Janus pulled the needle out and the assistant wiped the hole with iodine.
‘Primary epidural administration sequence completed’ - said Dr. Janus - ‘Placing the empty syringe on a tray, and picking up a second, larger syringe.
Baxter continued to scream.
Dr. Janus pushed the second syringe into Baxter’s spine - ‘Secondary epidural administration sequence initiated’
Baxter’s screaming intensified, snot and drool hung from his face and his eyes were filled with terror and pain.
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
When the syringe was empty Dr. Janus placed it on the tray and picked up the third, and smallest syringe.
The assistant wiped the hole with iodine.
Dr. Janus pushed the syringe into the third marked area - ‘Final epidural administration sequence initiated’
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
The final syringe emptied - and Baxter continued to scream and then the needle was pulled out and the hole was wiped with iodine.
‘Epidural administration sequence completed’ - said Dr. Janus, standing up.
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
Dr. Janus walked around and took the pen light from her breast pocket, and shone it into Baxter’s wet and terrified eyes - ‘Except for the pain, which will pass - how are you feeling Mr. McGill?’
Baxter couldn’t speak - he was crying and sobbing.
Dr. Janus stared at Baxter, and shrugged with her eyebrows - ‘Okay - let’s get get the chip inserted, his memory cleaned up, and then we can call it a night’
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
Dr. Janus walked back behind Baxter and sat down. She placed a surgical mask over her face, and put on a pair of what appeared to be virtual reality goggles.
The assistant handed Dr. Janus a drill, with a long thin drill bit attached. Dr. Janus held the drill against the back of Baxter’s skull, and then began drilling through the skin and bone. The assistant used a sucking device to suck up the blood and bone fragments.
Baxter’s screaming continued at a more intense level.
When a hole had appeared in Baxter’s skull, Dr. Janus took a long thin and flexible tube, which she inserted into the hole.
‘Insertion between Occipital lobe and Parietal lobe commencing’ - said Dr. Janus.
The doctor continued to work.
‘Payload in position…’ - said the doctor - ‘...and depositing payload…now!’
And then Dr. Janus pulled the long thin pipe out of Baxter’s head, and some blood and clear liquid ran out of the small hole in the back of his skull.
‘Okay - let’s get that cleaned up’ - said Dr. Janus, removing the device from her eyes.
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
The assistant pumped some flesh coloured gel into the hole, and then wiped the surface. The hole had vanished. Baxter continued to cry and sob.
‘And now memory’ - said Dr. Janus, standing.
The doctor’s assistant walked to the side and returned with a device that he placed over Baxter’s shaved head.
Dr. Janus went to a computer, and made some keystrokes.
‘Ready when you are, doctor’ - said the assistant, stepping back.
Dr. Janus looked at Baxter and smiled - ‘It was a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. McGill’
And then Dr. Janus hit a button, and Baxter’s body went stiff and his eyes bulged and then his body went limp and his eyes closed.
‘Okay - let’s get him cleaned up and dropped off’ - said Dr. Janus
‘Yes doctor’ - said the assistant.
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