“Every person,” Eve replied like a bored teacher, “has access to all the basic classes, species-specific classes. But, if they are lucky and have met the prerequisites, they might even have uncommon or higher-tier classes available to choose from. Now, let's start with you. Based on your previous actions you have gained access to the unique class ‘Road Warrior’. You will start by selecting this.”

“Why?” I asked. My eyebrow cranked up to confused Spock levels. My anxiety had already spiked when this pint-sized know it all showed up out of nowhere. Oh, the Earth is being invaded. I’m supposed to be some savior of humanity. Choose this class because I said so. Yeah, I may not know what the hell is going on, but I don’t need anyone telling me what I have to do. The last woman to do that got primary custody and twenty percent of my check. And Eve’s vituperative tone was growing into levels reserved for teenagers explaining the latest social media app to the senior center. As far as I was concerned Eve was a part of the stupid System and just as culpable.

“Because,” Eve continued with a huff, “unique classes are extremely powerful. They tend to be a bit specialized, but they offer the biggest bonuses. And they usually provide unique skills that are hard to counter.” Eve tilted her head at me and her oversized eyes narrowed in calculation. “It will also provide you with the best chance of survival and abilities to protect Noah.”

I glared right back at the little snot for a long moment. “Fine, sold,” I relented. “But we are going to have a serious talk later.”

The ‘Road Warrior’ class gave me the abilities [Cannonball Run], [Convoy], and [Impact] and huge bonuses to driving, mechanics, and one-handed combat skills. There were several different ability trees I had access to. They all had different themes though, vehicular combat, repairing and upgrading, armoring, mass combat, regeneration, and scavenging.

I settled on regeneration and took several steps up that tree. It gave me a bonus to health and stamina regeneration for myself and my vehicle. But the clincher was the ability to spend mana to increase regeneration. Sure, I didn’t know what mana was, but I wasn’t about to let Eve know that.

Afterward, we went over professions, skills, and ideals. I ended up taking the profession of Rune Mechanic, which focused on the creation of system-enhanced machinery. I took the ideal of earth because it would eventually lead to the ideal of metal and that would help me fabricate new parts. For skills, I just told Eve to pick whatever she thought was needed. I was just done at this point. Any leftover RP was going to be banked towards upgrading my overall tier, another topic of mystery.

After going over my stuff we started in on Noah. Because I was his caretaker, I could choose how he spent his points. Noah had an ERL of 42 and had gotten the unique class ‘Sponge’. I guess it was because we were in a party together and he got all the gains while doing nothing. He got [Drain] and [Siphon] for his main abilities. For his skills, I instructed Eve to increase Noah’s discipline and willpower. The rest he could spend when he came of age.

Koko and Liberty just got some basic upgrades to the stats. As non-sentients, they didn’t get access to classes or ideals.

With everything settled, Eve turned to me and spoke. “Since you wanted to do this quickly, it will hurt.”

“It's ok, I can handle it,” I replied cooly.

I couldn’t handle it.

My teeth ground together as ripples of searing pain flooded through my body. My every muscle strained and flexed. I couldn’t even open my mouth to scream. My knuckles whitened on the steering wheel. As my vision went black, I heard it crunch under my grip. Then my ears were boiled from the inside with the scraping grinding noise as my bones shattered and reformed.

I jolted awake a moment later, drenched in red sweat. Panting, I looked at Eve and said, “let's not do that to Noah.”

“Do what to me? Are you ok? Are you sick?” Noah asked.

“Not sick, I was just getting stronger just like Ee-vee-ee said,” I replied as calmly as I could.

“I can spend Noah’s RP slowly, he may feel a little under the weather for a bit, but it shouldn’t cause any serious discomfort,” Eve said.

“Then let's do it,” I said as I finally caught my breath.

Noah and Koko started to whimper.

“Hang on buddy, you’ll feel better soon,” I said, trying to comfort Noah. I hated seeing my boy in pain, and I knew this did not feel pleasant.

“And,” Eve said, “There is the matter of your bound weapon. And don’t even think about the Glock. Before you can ask, what is the point of binding a gun to yourself? It’s the bullet that kills things unless you intend to pistol whip everything to death. Instead, I would suggest choosing the lovely hammer you have in the second tote on the right. Now that Liberty is upgraded, we have access to her complete inventory list.”

Eve knew she was pissing me off and wasn’t doing a damn thing to dial the bitch back. The AI had to be poking around inside my skull. And I liked my privacy. There must be some settings to eliminate her access. I don’t know why I listened to her, but I did.

I got out and got my camping hammer from right where she said it would be. It was more of a demolition hammer than something for everyday use. It was made from a solid piece of steel with an extended claw for board grabbing. I just thought the oversized strike face made it easier to drive in tent stakes. I selected the hammer as my bonded weapon and felt energy surge through me and into the handle. The hammer stretched out and grew an additional foot. The strike face swelled larger, and the claw shined with a razor’s edge.

I took a few test swings and the hammer sliced through the air with a whistle. Logically, the hammer was bigger and heavier, but in my hands, it felt as light as a feather. Maybe that was the bonding effect or my improved strength, I wasn’t sure. But it felt incredible. Like shackles that held me my entire life had been suddenly removed.

With hammer in hand, I climbed back into Liberty. I dropped the hammer onto Eve and watched it plop onto the seat. Her projection blurred where it met the hammer. Eve glared at me while she stood and pretended to sit her imaginary ass on the hammer. She rose her hand in the classic road rage salute only to have a black censored bar flash into existence.

I smirked and pulled back Liberty back onto the road. Driving felt different. More fluid and more connected. It was like the jeep was an extension of my body. I gunned it, then braked hard. Liberty reacted faster than ever, but inside it was smooth as silk, the like inertia held no effect on us. I continued to play around as we got closer to town. I was thinking about trying some drifts when an incoming call lit up the console screen.

“What’s happenin’ spooge sock?” John’s burly voice broadcast inside Liberty.

“What’s spooge?” Noah asked.

“It's, um, that nasty stuff between your toes,” I answered. “And don’t you ever say that word again, it's on the no-no list”