The Siege of Kapa Capitol, City of the Undershell, starts in earnest. Commander Mackie Wayne’s corpse is still warm when the Kapas charge, their phalanx spears sweeping across the battlefield in a steady row of death.

Against a normal enemy, this would have been an insurmountable wall of sharp pain followed by screams of torment as the spears dug deep into their belly. But against a skeletal warrior—

“Doug, JUMP!”

Skeleton obeys, leaping high into the air, still partially empowered by Rally Cry. His body of bone disappears into the rising smoke. As the pikes rise to meet him, Greg buries a spear of his own into a soldier on the second row of the tightly packed phalanx, partially collapsing the formation as Doug lands with his spearhead pointing down.

And like that, the formation of close to a dozen soldiers breaks into a cacophony of screams, their flailing bodies partially obscured in smoke as they desperately fight against Doug’s haphazard hacks and slashes. In the sight of such madness, the rest of the soldiers spill out of the gates, rushing to save their fellow brothers in arms. But Greg anticipated this. As the soldiers run out, Greg sprints past Doug’s battle with the rapidly depleting formation carrying two flaming logs trailing bitter black smoke. Without pause and with the last of the strength granted by Rally, Greg launches the burning pieces of wood at the charging Kapa, obstructing the gate and spewing fire in a splash of heat and flames.

Kapa scream, some in shock, others because their loincloths catch fire! But neither is the goal of the skeleton warrior. As Greg smiles, his face becomes obscured in the smoke that seems to spread in all directions, which, of course, is his real goal. In this smoke, Greg and Doug become like wraiths, their skeletal bodies moving in and out of Kapas’ vision, leaving only screams as their numbers dwindle and fear begins to spread.

Once again, Greg’s mind becomes consumed by the System’s constant notification of the EXP gained from killing Kapa soldiers. More pour in, jumping over the fire while others try to run past it, but their fate remains the same. Greg slashes, thrusts, skewers, and gouges turtle after turtle. The screams become music, and Greg’s body is covered in a mix of black soot and red blood. Doug finished his group of soldiers and is already cutting his way through the Kapa to fight side by side with him.

The disorganized and panicked turtles are little match for the Skellys. However, as soon the commanders find the courage to cross over the burning impediment, the constant stream of EXP starts to slow.

Without realizing it, both Greg and Doug are surrounded.

“Fuck,” Greg thinks, his mind searching for a way out amongst the circle of spears. Greg looks back and forth while backing up against the walls, which are burning out of control. By now, he can hear the screams of panic as citizens attempt to evacuate from the city. The flames will spread until they eventually consume everything, but in the meantime, Greg has to survive the small army of Kappa that has him surrounded on both sides.

A thought occurs to Greg in a moment of desperation. Maybe he could use Doug as a decoy while he flees into the swamp! And at first, he strongly considered it, but then he takes a sidelong glance at his fellow Skeleton Warrior, diligently following his lead as he backs up, no doubt also afraid to die….

“Well fuck."

I am projecting, Greg thinks, but he can’t shake the feeling that the automaton is actually a person underneath the veil of simplicity. Especially since he named him. Greg groans internally under the implied responsibility and the ridiculousness of wanting to protect the fantasy equivalent of a TI-80 calculator!

“RALLY CRY!” Greg screams as the Kapa approach. They paused their slow march forward, which is a mistake. Greg grabs Doug and tosses him over the walls. Or tries to.

Greg has increased strength… Yes. Doug is also relatively light… Also yes. But the wall is over 20 feet tall and requires a ladder to get to the top of. Only luck overcomes surprise when Doug grabs on to some measure of purchase as gravity pulls him down. He climbs, ignoring the fire, using instinct to dig into the weakened wood with his basic short sword. The wood creaks underneath his weight, but he makes it to the top just in time as Greg jumps after him.

Skeletons don’t have 20-foot verticals. So this attempt would have been ill-fated if Greg wasn’t holding on to a Kapa Spear. In a mid-air maneuver that would make an elf jealous, Greg thrusts his spear, and Doug grabs it in a surprise bout of dexterity. The flames lick at Greg’s skeletal body, but he ignores the vague feeling of burning as he works with Doug to pull him up.

The Kapa below swear, shouting and screaming in unison. But the worst of this siege is just getting started.