《Smash Gal & Esvanir》Issue #2: Double Date

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=== Curt ===

Having powers made Cindi sloppy. She relied almost exclusively on her natural talent and . . . distracting physique to get away with her things. It had gotten her captured a handful of times. But by the time she was put in the back of the car, she was out of the car. By the time they drove away, she had slipped away, leaving behind the coat or whatever they used to cover her up. Sometimes, I thought she would get caught on purpose because it was more fun or she hated the client or both.

“It won't work,” I said, simply, after she told me what she was after.

“What do you mean it won't work? I can phase through walls and you can teleport!”

“You try to phase through this wall, you'll be shocked until you're tangible again and your powers will be shorted out for a few hours. Enough time to book you. Or kill you.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I was planning on liberating some of the stuff a year or so back. Got a look at the security system. Marcelli's a nut. Hates metas. Specifically installed something to keep 'those freaks and thieves out',” I said, putting air quotes around his words.

“Okay, that stops me, what about you?”

“Part of the system detects weight changes. My tech briefly increases gravity when I use it. An electrified cage comes down and shocks me until I'm dead. Or unconscious.”

“So, you're just going to give up. Let him beat you. Let him be smarter than you,” she said, poking my bare chest. We had gotten a little distracted after the news broadcast. Worst of all, she called me Esvanir when she climaxed.

“Lots of people are smarter than me. Bion, tons of the people he hires, probably Professor Mind,” I said noncommittally.

“And Marcelli?” She prodded.

“Has enough money to hire smarter people.”

“Yeah, he solves all his problems with money, alright,” she said, laying her head back down on my chest. Her long, wavy hair covered her face. But revealing the cherry tattoo on her shoulder blade. Her hair didn't quite cover the double cherries on the small of her back either. The media had gone nuts after she got them. I could hear the smile in her voice when she spoke next. She thought she had me. “Hurts a lot of people to get that much money, too. Shame no one is smart enough to put him in his place.”

I screwed up my face. “We can't do it tonight.”

“Oh? But we can do it.”

“We . . . We need to do recon. Make sure he hasn't upgraded the system since last year. And we're going to grab a piece of a computer he has, while we're stealing your statue,” I said. She leaned up and kissed me, mouth quirked up into a grin. Her blue eyes poured into mine.

“Deal.”

=== Kari ===

Mom and dad came around to my line of thinking. It took a couple of days, but they did. Mostly because I refused to do any tests. Broke a bunch of beakers and leaked chemicals everywhere too. It wasn't fair. What are they going to do? Keep me here until I'm 90? I thought to myself. A few days later, I found a package on my bed. I sped towards it and tore it open in an instant. Before me fell a somewhat frumpy-looking suit. It was in my favorite color, pink. With red accents. But it was so . . . Frumpy. I sped off and found mom and dad.

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“What's this about?” I asked when I found them.

“Well, that's your costume. For when you . . . Fight crime,” mom said, hesitantly. In a spin, I tried it on. It was a tight fit in some places. It didn't show an inch of skin. Also, there was a long skirt that went down to my mid-calf.

“I don't think I can fight in this, though,” I said, gesturing.

“Why not?” Daddy asked.

“Because if I tried, I'd trip over the skirt. And besides, it's not really what I want to wear.”

“What would you change about it?” Mom asked, disapproval already crawling into her tone.

“Well, I like the skirt idea. But I'd shorten it to mid-thigh,” I said, tracing a line to about where I would make the cut. “Make it a bit tighter. Make everything a bit tighter. Cut the chest right here.”

“You'd be practically naked!” My mom shrieked.

“Mom, c'mon. I'm 28. And besides, I'd be wearing a lot more than Buck Cherry.”

“Buck Cherry is a harlot,” my mother said, evenly. “And this will protect you better.”

“Protect me? From what? What can hurt me? It took you guys three years to get a blood sample. And you had to use a diamond-tipped drill. And that broke.”

Mom and dad looked at each other. “Well, what about your identity? How will we protect that?”

I thought about it for a moment. “I have an idea! We can make it have two purposes. A tinted sheer face mask. It'll keep the wind out of my eyes when I'm flying and hide my face.”

“What if they recognize your body?”

“Mom, c'mon. No one's going to recognize me from my abs. They're just going to be jealous of them,” I said proudly. She sighed and nodded.

We spent the next few days reworking the costume.

=== Curt ===

“Alright, we will have three minutes to get in and out. That shouldn't be a problem,” I said, looking over the blueprints we had stolen. He had upgraded his system since last time. And I figured there were a few things off the books, too, but no plan survives the first contact, after all.

“Finally,” Cindi said, wrapping her arms around me.

“I still wish we had more time to make sure there are no surprises.”

“We already wasted three days staking the place out. We have a plan. It should work.”

“Well, the good news is that there won't be any metas around. We just have to worry about regular people.”

“Easy peasy,” Cindi said with a smile.

“You say that, but I am a vanilla human and I still beat your ass every time,” I responded, reaching over to tickle her.

“You? Vanilla? Sure, hon,” she said, slapping my hand away. “Besides. You just teleported me 40 miles away. I hardly call that winning.”

“Stops the fight,” I pointed out. She conceded the point with a shrug.

“Maybe. If we get out okay, I'll let you beat my ass in a different way. As long as you still have the silk ropes.” She grinned at me. Cindi was an odd one. She usually blows (pun intended) into my life for a couple of days and it would be great. She is always really affectionate. We would pull off a job together, then she'd disappear for weeks or months at a time. When I was with her, I was the only one that mattered. But I suspected that when I wasn't, she didn't remember I existed.

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We got a little distracted again.

=== Kari ===

I stretched out my arms and charged forward. I could never hear the thunderous boom I caused, but my parents had recorded it for me. At one point, they had managed to measure how fast I was going. I was hypersonic. But that wasn't necessary in the city. I could cover the entire city in almost an instant. It was maybe 400 miles. Not that big. When I got within city limits, I slowed down to a much more reasonable 100 miles per hour, or so. I flew down and watched the city. I heard something coming towards me fast. Less than a second later, I saw it. I came to a complete stop and a large, slightly blue, transparent missile narrowly missed me.

Seconds later, a man flew up to me and geared himself up for a fight. “Who are you and what are you doing here? And why did you approach the city at Mach 8?”

“Mach 8? I can reach Mach 8? That's so cool!” I said, smiling. I even did a little loop-de-loop. The man lowered his hands and stared at me.

“Y-you didn't know?”

“I knew it was hypersonic, but I didn't know how much exactly.”

“Oh . . . okay,” He said, scratching his chin. Then resumed his fighting stance. “Well, why were you going so fast? Why are you here? Are you here to rob a bank or destroy the city?”

“No! I'm here to be a hero. Like Bion, or . . . Hey, you're Professor Mind!” I said and I rushed towards him and examined his suit. He was a tall man, fit. His costume was blue and white, with PM emblazoned on his chest in a slightly darker blue. He backed up instantly and summoned a shield. I whistled. I had seen his powers from videos and stuff, but this was way cooler. His features softened a little bit and his shield faded when I asked “Can I have your autograph? Actually, three autographs. One for me and two for my . . . Friends.”

“You . . . Who are you?” He asked again. I sighed and looked down.

“Smash Gal,” I muttered in the smallest possible voice. He said he couldn't hear me. “I'm . . . I'm Smash Gal.”

“Smash Gal?” He thought for a moment, then laughed. “You're that girl from the video? In the hoodie and the torn-up jeans?”

“I didn't have a costume then!” I said defensively. “And I'm going to get the name changed!”

“Good luck with that one. Once you become a hashtag, that's your name forever. Trust me,” he pointed to his chest. “Might as well just embrace it now.”

“So, you're here to help? That's great. Can always use more heroes,” He said, gesturing to me to follow him. I did. We flew past a building and I caught sight of the two of us. And my new costume. His mask barely hid his face. Really just going around the eyes. His hair, nose, mouth, and chin were all visible. And he was good-looking. Strong. Especially for someone who didn't have to be. Professor Mind was purely a telekinetic and a telepathic hero. He created images with his mind.

I stopped to admire my reflection and he watched on. We kept the color scheme and added white to it. But we had changed everything else. I was wearing a skirt that ended a good three inches above the knee. I wanted it more, but mom threw a fit at the thought. She had also insisted on stockings. We got mauve boots and a matching cape that came just past my knees. Every part of the trim matched as well. My head was wrapped up entirely, hiding my hair. My ears stuck out so I could hear. Well, that was the excuse I gave. I could hear just fine, but it was uncomfortable. We had left my mid-drift entirely exposed. I had worked hard to get the ab definition I had and by God, I was going to show it off. The skirt and top were both lavender-pink, except for the trim. We added a white belt and a white line going from the neckline to the bottom of the shirt, between my breasts. Mom and dad weren't happy that I was bringing attention to my chest, but I won in the end. There was white and mauve trim lining the sides. And the headwrap was also mauve. Over my face was a face shield. It was darker on the exterior than it was on the inside. Enough to hide my face. But I could see perfectly. I look hot!

“Yeah, you do,” Professor Mind said. He closed the distance between us.

“Oh, did I say that out loud?” I asked, blushing.

“No, some thoughts are louder than others and it's hard for me to tune it out,” He said, wrapping an arm around my waist. “Let's go. I'll show you the ropes, Smash Gal.”

It sounds less stupid when he says it, I thought. I let him guide me. Dusk had fallen and it was dark. The city was so loud compared to the small compound I was used to being in. We flew for a while until we found a couple of robbers sticking up a small bodega. One of them unloaded a clip onto me before realizing that the bullets just bounced off. It didn't even tear my costume! Mom said it was made of some special material that was resistant to everything. It is dry clean only, though. Which means I'll have to find a way to dry clean it, I considered that for a moment before charging forward and body checking one of the thieves. He started to go flying before I caught his foot and lowered him to the ground. Well, let him fall to the ground. Professor Mind had already wrapped up the other one in tight blue bindings.

“You're pretty strong,” he said.

“You ain't seen nothing, yet!” I promised, with a grin.

=== Curt ===

We got to Marcelli's place a little after dark. I knew enough about programming to know that I couldn't hack into his security system. So, instead, I was just going to overload it. I grabbed Buck Cherry and we snapped over to the wall. I used an ultrasound I had . . . borrowed from Des and retrofitted for other uses and found a wire. After Cindi had stripped, I boosted my partner up and she slid through the wall slightly and gripped and pulled out a wire. It wasn't enough to just snip it. So instead I stripped it and attached a small battery up to it and maxed out the voltage, overloading the system. I took all of her clothes and put them in my bag. She gripped my hand and slipped us through the wall.

We had timed the guards pretty well. And only the inside of the house could detect us. At least now that the outer cameras were down for a few minutes until the backup system kicked in. She floated us up a couple of feet above the ground. She can fly. Not very fast. In fact, it's slower than most people jog. But it's better than falling to the core of the planet, getting so hot that she can't concentrate on her insubstantiality and burning to a crisp in an instant. She hadn't liked it when I pointed out that this was not only possible but fairly probable.

Buck Cherry and I flew through the wall and she kept us up above the ground and away from the sensors. Fortunately, only she needed to be naked for this. She claimed it was a huge waste and a disappointment that I wasn't naked. In fact, I had put on a mask. Just in case there were more cameras. Cindi had a different identity she could crawl into. Several, in fact. If I was caught, I'd go to prison for life. And some people can't just walk out of it. I was entirely dependent on a fluke accident that I managed to understand and repeat. She lowered us down and became substantial, straddling me. “Hey, big boy. How you doin'?”

I rolled my eyes and pushed her off of me. “Come on, we have a job to do and about two and a half minutes to do it.”

“For you, that gives us about a minute to cuddle,” she said, pouting.

“You know me, I always recover quickly enough to get you what you need,” I pointed out, walking over to the other side of the room. I took out a drill gun and unscrewed a panel, then pulled out some wires. I attached one of the same batteries and overloaded the whole grid of the house, this time. The lights flickered and then went off. We rushed into the house. We had agreed to do the computer thing first since the statue was heavier and harder to move. We got to the computer room with little trouble. It had about 8 screens and was manned by a security guard. With no power, he was desperately trying to bring it back on.

Cindi made her way over to him, grabbed him by the chin and he convulsed for a moment and then fell back to his chair, slumped over. I smiled at her and nodded, crouching under the desk. I unplugged the computer and just stuffed it into my industrial backpack. Once we got out of the room, the lights came back on. “Oh. Oh no.”

“That's bad, isn't it. I thought we had another . . .” Cherry mentally calculated. “Minute, minute and a half.”

“Must've been a part of the upgrade that we missed. Damn it. Come on. Let's get your piece. Hurry. It's going to be a smash and grab.”

“Oooh. I love smash and grabs,” she said, winking as she passed me. We got into the art room. There were a lot of pretentious pieces from all over the world. Everything clashed. He had Ming Dynasty Pots next to Edo Era paintings. But we came for an Egyptian piece. A huge statue of a panther. A symbol of Baast. It weighed almost half a ton and was going to be really difficult to teleport. But it's what we're here for. Let's get to it, I thought, rushing over to it. Cindi was right next to me. It was behind a glass cube. I grabbed one of the swords, a nice piece from the Middle East, and smashed the glass. The alarm went off and a cage slammed down around us. “I thought you said that was a bad idea. That it was going to electrocute us until we couldn't use our powers!”

“Five . . .” I snapped and opened a portal between us and the statue. “Four . . .”

“The counting is making me nervous,” Cherry said. I motioned to the statue, but she was already there.

“Three . . .” It scraped against the ground, barely budging. I moved over to help and it moved a little more. “Two . . .”

=== Kari ===

We had circled the city when I heard the alarm. I froze and looked over at the ceiling. Professor Mind had stopped, too, looking at me. “What is it?”

“There's an alarm. Over there.” I pointed in the general direction before taking off. Professor Mind followed. I didn't go my full speed, but he still struggled to keep up. When he saw the place he put a giant blue hand in front of me.

“Stop!” He cried out. I stopped in an instant, just before the hand.

“What? Someone's stealing something. We need to stop them.”

“That's Vinny Marcelli's place. He's . . . Not friendly to us metas. He might kill us if we break-in.”

“I'd like to see him try!” I said, diving below the hand. I burst through the window and accidentally slammed into a set of bars. I stopped and looked around. There was a masked figure and a . . . naked woman, hugging a statue.

“Zero!” The man called out and winced, before looking around. Professor Mind flew in after me and looked around the scene, grimacing. The woman I now recognized as Buck Cherry did a final push on the statue and it fell through a . . . hole in the floor. The hole disappeared with a snap, leaving elegant sandstone behind.

“Stop, fiends!” I cried out, internally cringing as the last syllable left my lips.

“Fiends?” The other three asked at the same time.

“Essy, let's go,” Buck Cherry insisted.

“Can't. We need to buy . . .” The masked man responded, looking up slightly then grimaced. “Thirty seconds? Fuck.”

“Oh, is that all?” The woman asked, irritation plain in her voice.

“You don't have two seconds,” I said, charging forward, throwing a punch. The man managed to duck under my fist, which went through the wall. He stepped to the side only to be grabbed by Professor Mind. He gripped him tight in his translucent bonds. But he had targeted the wrong one. Buck Cherry slipped up next to him and grabbed him by the neck. The Professor collapsed to his knees and the bindings faded away. I pulled my fist from the wall and shook off the drywall from my gloves.

“Super strength, super speed, strength,” the man muttered. “You don't match anyone in the city. You're new.”

I charged him again and he barely dodged that hit too. I threw another punch and this time, I heard a snap and a hole appeared where my hand was going and a fist . . . my fist slammed into my face. I pulled my hand out of the hole. “What the hell?”

“How much longer?” Buck Cherry whined.

“Uh . . . Eighteen . . . Sixteen seconds,” the man said calculating. He tried stepping to the side again but I punched where he was going and he stopped, barely managing to not be clothes-lined by my arm.

=== Curt ===

My glasses had a timer counting down. It took a lot of energy to transport something that heavy. It also took a lot of energy to transport something that far. But my cut would be worth it. If I lived to collect it. I dodged another punch made by this pink menace. She's faster than me. By magnitudes. The only way I can dodge her is by starting before she starts moving. Which is really difficult to predict. I need to get over to Cherry before too long. Twelve seconds. I took out another toy that I had in my pocket and hoped. I slammed the thing against the attacking woman's bare abdomen and pressed the button. It was a modified taser. Powered by three of the batteries I had used to knock out the house's power.

“That tickles,” the woman in pink said. “My turn.”

She brought her fist down on my back and I slammed into the ground. Cherry looked at me. Then down at Professor Mind. She shook her head and took her hand from his temples and booked it. That's fair, I thought. She got what she came for. I pulled myself off of the ground, staggering. Eight seconds. The woman lifted me up by my shirt and pulled back her fist. There was a commotion behind her and she staggered forward. She dropped me and turned. Marcelli and his guards were all there.

“What the fuck do you think you're doing?” The man demanded. He was the size of a small mountain and made of harder stone. “You moron heroes let her get away! Everything was well in hand before you burst through my door and my cage.”

“I was just trying to help. I heard the alarm!” The woman protested. Professor Mind shook his head and crawled to his feet.

“Well, you're doing a great job. Let them get away with my statue and one of them escaped. Are you proud of yourse-” I didn't stick around to hear the rest of it. I snapped my finger. Marcelli, his goons, Professor Mind, and the Pink Woman washed away and when my eyes focused again, I was in my apartment. My cramped apartment. Forty miles from Marcelli's vault-like house. I staggered away. Whoever that was, she hit like a fucking truck. I laid down.

=== Kari ===

“What's the matter, Marcelli?” Professor Mind grimaced, standing straight. “Afraid of what we'll find if we snoop around?”

“I am a legitimate businessman,” Marcelli said evenly. “Which is more than I can say for costumed vigilantes. I could talk to the mayor and see what we can do about . . . restricting your actions, freak.”

“You're a crook who abuses people for money. A drug-runner. A money launderer,” Mind shot back, angrily. “And were I truly the vigilante you think I am, I would tear this place apart and find proof of what you're doing.”

“Which, if there was anything to find, would never stand up in court. Which is the reason you don't.”

I turned away from the boys having their pissing contest. The man in the mask was gone. I frowned. He got away. He . . . disappeared! “Esvanir!”

Both of the men looked at me. Marcelli's men did, too. “Esvanir?”

“That's who that was. Esvanir. He robbed Wan En a couple of days ago.”

“Obviously,” Marcelli responded in a droll tone, rolling his eyes. “She must be pretty under that mask, because she's not quite up to normal standards, mentally, boy.”

I growled and charged him only to be pulled back by something. I tried to reach Marcelli, but the force gripping my foot tightened. And started to pull me back. Through a strained voice, Professor Mind managed to say “Don't. It's what he wants.”

“He called me stupid!”

“And punching me is going to change my mind? Dear, you are very slow.” His tone had that same bored, condescending affectation. I hated it.

“C'mon, we'll let them clean it up. Let's go.” The Professor released his mental grip on my leg. We flew out together, my arms were shaking. I wanted to go back and throttle that arrogant giant. And Esvanir!

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