A shock echoed through the tribe following grandmother’s words, but she would not be dissuaded, and she did what she always did. She started getting things done. She comforted the crying children and encouraged their parents. Then she appointed her successor. Little Ant wasn’t surprised when it turned out to be Bee. She had proved her steady hand and quick mind more than once.

But she would be a pale imitation of Old Badger, and all knew it.

This is my fault, Little Ant thought.

Everyone was wishing her luck and blessing of the Quiet, but every kind word just fed her guilt. If it hadn’t been for her, grandmother wouldn’t have to… It wasn’t uncommon for goblins to banish themselves as punishment for mistakes or recklessness, but it was never supposed to be permanent. Just to give some hothead time to cool off and think of what he had done before being welcomed back.

When someone of Old Badger’s age did it… everyone knew she wasn’t coming back. Grandmother didn’t deserve that. Dying in the woods without a tribe. Cold and unprotected.

Eventually the well-wishes became too much to bear, and she fled to her family’s tent. When Little Ant stumbled inside, her parents were waiting for her, and they took her in their arms and held her in a way they hadn’t since she had been a child. Their faces were wet with tears and somehow… seeing her parents weep was scarier than seeing the maw of the bear prince.

“… you… stupid… brave girl.” Mother whispered while holding her.

“… why did you have to be so… bloody courageous?” Father said.

They clung to her like they were all caught in a storm together. When they finally let go and sat down to eat none of them touched their food with any enthusiasm. What Little Ant could put in her mouth, she barely tasted. It was all just ash on her tongue. When it came to time to sleep, her mother took her aside.

“You should have this.” Mother said.

Goblins didn’t carry anything unnecessary but even they had mementos. Mother dug out one of theirs and handed her a neatly packaged, small tent. One’s own tent… was only gifted to adults of the tribe. The sign of independence.

“This is…?” Little Ant said.

“You didn’t think we’d let you leave without a roof over your head? You need to think, Ant.” Mother said and looked at the small tent: “It belonged to your uncle. I hope it serves you better than it did him.”

It had been a long time, but that evening Little Ant hugged her mother and kissed her cheek.

The night was restless and when morning came, Little Ant had barely slept. Grandmother was already waiting for her, and it didn’t look like she’d had much more sleep than her. They just nodded to each other and began walking. Goodbyes had been said in the moonlight. Sneaking out at dawn was the only kindness they could now do… to their former tribe.

Despite being the tribe’s grandmother… former grandmother with years weighing her down, Old Badger could march like a goblin half her age. When Little Ant looked at grandmother, she could imagine her getting careless with her steps and breaking her ankle or stepping on a thorn. A wound like that would get infected quickly and without a tribe to keep you safe… grandmother would… she would…

“… I am sorry.” Little Ant said.

Old Badger just looked at her and smiled. Whenever she saw that smile, it felt like everything would turn out alright.

“Don’t be. I knew that there would be problems with the Bear Clan. They have always been an angry lot. Although I did not expect them to be this brazen.” Old Badger said and looked back at the camp that was growing more distant with every step: “I just hope I didn’t forget anything when I left Bee with the instructions. My mind isn’t quite what it used to be.”

How could she be worried of others during times like this?

“What… will we do now?”

“Find proof of vampires by the looks of it.” Old Badger said.

Little Ant stared at her feet for a moment and then dared to look at Old Badger. The forgiveness just made it worse. She would have preferred having grandmother spit and curse at her for getting them in this mess. But she still looked at her like someone worthy of trust and respect. Trust and respect… they weighed her like a mountain.

“… we could go to the fox prince.” Little Ant said.

“We could if we belonged to the Hillside Tribe but we’re no longer under his protection.”

“He would help you.” Little Ant said.

“He would and that is why I cannot go. It would put our former tribe in danger. He is their guardian deity after all. It would… put him in danger as well. He is not as savage as he used to be. Not as strong. Don’t tell him I said this but… he has gone a bit tame from living as a human. I don’t want him to get hurt.” Old Badger said and then winked at her: “Asking for help is nothing to be ashamed of but you need to know when to help yourself.”

“Not like he has been much help.” Little Ant said spitefully: “He should have been here. Isn’t he supposed to be our guardian deity?”

“When you’re too dependent on someone else, they become your jailer. Besides, just his name made the Bear Clan back off.” Old Badger said.

Little Ant fell quiet again and thought what grandmother had said.

“What did the bear prince mean when he said his brother’s spirit was dead?”

“I’ve never told you that?” Old Badger said surprised: “I must be getting old. You know how skin-changers can turn into others?”

“Yeah. They eat someone and take memories and shape.” Little Ant said.

“Yes. Exactly. But the queens of the skin-changer clans are different. When a skin-changer dies, the clan’s queen comes to them and gobbles them up. They eat the souls of their children so one day they can give birth to them again.”

“And you met one of the queens?” Little Ant said.

“Yes. Long time ago. When I ran with the fox prince. I was the fox queen’s guest and she made me a friend of her clan. Her other gift I had to turn down.”

“And what was that?” Little Ant asked.

“Immortality.”