《Oh Arceus, I'm a Pokemon! Now What?》Ch. 13 - The Grass is Definitely Greener
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I lay down on my virtual bed in my virtual environment, staring at the virtual ceiling — or rather through it. There was no ceiling in this strange no-space when I didn’t desire it, instead the world outside played itself across the skies. I flicked my tail idly and sped up time slightly as Ed and Becca walked around Rustboro, seeing to their own errands.
An hour or so earlier, Ed had gotten his first badge and everybody was still just sort of decompressing.
After wandering through a few shops and stalls in the open-air market, Ed picked up an official Hoenn League cap and a bunch of supplies, including an escape rope and some general purpose antidotes and health potions. Becca made sure she stocked up on a few lure’s, pokéballs and similar supplies to Ed. She also spent some poké on some contest seals and pokéball skins. I could have been out there with them, but for several reasons I needed a break, from everything. It was surprisingly relaxing inside my pokéball, watching the world go by, and despite speeding up time — or rather slowing down my perception of the outside world — it gave me time to think.
I’d just competed in a gym battle. Me! My first real gym battle! True, I’d been on the other side of the battle than at least part of me had expected when I'd been... younger, but that made it even more awesome. And scary. I'd fought a nosepass, and won! True, I’d been knocked out, and it hadn’t all been down to me, but so had he! And he was Roxanne’s heavy hitter! I didn’t really know how to process it; It had been exhilarating, exhausting... something else beginning with ‘e’.
On the other paw and of greater concern, Team Rocket had escaped from jail, in no small part thanks to me. I couldn’t really see that as the worst of things though; they hadn’t managed to do anything serious when they'd been up to their shenanigans and they may even have helped me out if the pokéball they jury-rigged actually did what they claimed. Since theirs had, I had good cause to believe them. Flicking my tail thoughtfully, I idly wondered whether they'd had anything to do with the Master Ball. I suspected that they had. I had no real idea what they’d been doing in the region in the first place, but theft of something like the Master Ball? I wouldn't have been surprised. Of course, the question then became... who actually wanted it, and what for?
Come to think of it, I wondered whether they'd had anything to do with the strange goings on the top floor of the Devon Mall. I had the worrying feeling that they weren't, that would've made things much simpler going forwards.
That left us with that ‘Zyrna’ lady; who had she been? What had she ultimately been after? More to the point, who was this ‘Team Magma’ that she was apparently working for?
Lots of questions, few answers. I curled into a tighter ball on my bed, head on my tail, as I had myself a good old think.
Eventually Ed and Becca, and their Pokémon, left Rustboro for Route 116. They hiked along the trail without too many issues, chatting with that Sly guy. I didn’t trust him. My Ranger senses were tingling I was sure, which was the cause of my dislike. There was just... something about him. Sure, he was handy with a camera, but that was just a matter of pushing the right buttons, surely? I could’ve been a photographer, I reasoned. How difficult could it be? Maybe I was, when I wasn’t Rangering. Yeah, that made sense! Of course I didn’t like him, making such a deal about being a photographer when he was just a fake! I settled into a bout of seething suspiciously about Sly as the wilderness got wilderness-ier, and eventually it began to get dark.
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After enough hours had passed, the three humans eventually made camp. I flicked my tail again, watching as the night sky outside whirled and darkened, heading into the witching hour over the course of an hour or so. I was still watching the stars when I saw Sly get up and slip out of his sleeping back. Feeling completely refreshed, and now even more suspicious, I snuck out of my pokéball and slipped into the bushes after him.
I was forced to wrinkle my nose and abort mission as I almost ran into Sly dropping the kids off at the pool. Just like him to do such a thing in such a suspicious way. After he’d finished, I inspected the area. Nothing seemed amiss, but it would be just like him to leave something behind that didn’t belong for... for accomplices! Well, I’d make sure their job was harder than I needed to be! I found where Sly had buried his evidence, and disguised it with my own ‘package’. Scraping my hind paws on the ground to kick up some dirt and help disguise the scene, I snorted. Let’s see them find whatever it was he hid here now!
I snaked my way through the undergrowth to find Sly with his weird, flip-top phone out, typing madly away at something. I immediately decided to raise the alarm, yapping loudly.
Sly looked up, shock written large across his villainous features, as a shoe impacted me in the back of the head.
"[Oh for... Lux, shut up! It’s... Arceus’ teeth! It's Four in the morning!]" hissed Ed angrily and groggily, wielding his other shoe in case I started making noise again.
"[Sorry, I had to see to a call of nature, I must have frightened her or something when I came back,]" Sly said, ruefully rubbing the back of his own head, massaging his neck. "[You can go back to sleep, I was just checking my mail, I inquired about that photo gig and thought I’d check for a reply now I’m up. Nothing yet.]" He waved a hand dismissively as he took his own boots off — tossing Ed’s wayward footwear back towards the young trainer — and clambered back into his own sleeping bag.
"[Lux, for goodness' sake get back in your ball and shut up, it’s too bloody early for me to have to deal with you right now,]" Ed grumbled, brandishing the shoe again. "[If you don’t I’ll... you’ll get no poffins for a week!]"
I winced as Ed flounced back under the covers, grumbling angrily under his breath as he tried to get comfortable again. No poffins? For a week? Why is it that I am surrounded by Evil Children willing and able to lead my trainer astray? Jail for you too, Sly! Jail for ten thousand years!
I slunk back to my ball, recalling myself with an idle push from my mind, Intention triggering the beam from my luxury ball. I padded across the non-existent clearing and into my non-existent room and I dragged myself up onto my non-existent — yet strangely comfortable — bed and very really sulked as I glared at Sly through the faux skybox. He was curled up in his own tent, nose deep in his phone once more, tapping away as I watched him. For somebody without an important email to read, he was certainly doing a lot of writing. Everybody thought Sly was an innocent little Flaaffy, but I knew the truth. I would just have to take my time to prove it!
The next day dawned late and windy. I was pleased to see that my breakfast rations had not been diminished, though I was on tenterhooks and so therefore stayed on my best behavior despite the evils of Sly having breakfast like a normal person.
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We did no real training on the next day of the hike. I did taste some cool stream water, fight off an attack by a ludicolo or two, defeat a few pidgeys who objected to being told they should share their berries, run away from a flock of angry pidgeys that objected to being irontailed, regret my actions and life-choices under a log and the like, but nothing formal. All in all it was a busy day, one where I grew more accustomed still to my eevee body and thought hard about when it had become second nature to battle for supremacy with other Pokémon — or even consider ‘other Pokémon’ as a thing for me.
Eventually, the little group came upon a modest, rather utilitarian dwelling set near an obviously man-made hole in the local mountain, the Rustboro side of the Rusturf Tunnel. Some years ago it had been a half-finished excavation site and Route 116 had been a lot busier. These days it was more or less the other way around — Devon Corporation had apparently started excavating said tunnel some years back, but had originally stopped due to how the work had been disrupting the local Pokémon. A single guy with his rock-type Pokémon had then continued carving the rest of the tunnel by hand and paw, eventually completing the works.
Now, many years freed of the heavy machinery that had originally plied their trade up and down it, Route 116 was returning to nature in the implacable way most of the planet did the moment humans’ backs were turned, even though the Rusturf Tunnel itself was a relatively popular — and functionally complete — Pokémon hunting ground, in all senses of the word.
"Are you sure we don’t need a Pokémon with Flash?" Ed asked Becca, who shook her head as the boy looked pensively at the looming darkness ahead.
"No, we should be fine in that regards. Besides, if we did we’d have to watch out for angry Loudred, not to mention the odd Exploud or two. So, got your spelunking rope?" Becca took off her backpack and rifled through it as she made sure everything was in order before they got any further.
"Yep. Antidotes are in the medicine pocket, I checked. We’re good on Repels?"
"I have them, but let’s not use Repels unless things get really busy." Becca shouldered her bag again, bringing out Sissy and Chompy as she turned her attention to the man-made dwelling.
"Oh?"
"Well, you’re right about having more Pokémon than me, so I might want to pick up another team-mate," pondered Becca. "Although I don’t think I want a whismur and I won’t need another mawile, will I Sissy?"
"Maaa," Sissy grumbled, even as Becca tousled her pokémon’s head-fur.
"I like to see when trainers and their Pokémon get on well together." Sly chuckled as the fiesty dark type scowled. "You two let me know if you need me to hang on to anything important, okay? I might not have Pokémon, but that doesn't mean I can't be the mudbray if you need somebody to carry stuff and look handsome."
"We will," Becca continued.
"Unsure of the handsome part," snarked Ed, causing another chuckle from Sly, his scarlet eyes twinkling.
"Anyway, if I see a good candidate, we can always stop for a chat, or a fight," said Becca. "It’s a bit hard to do either of those things if the local Pokémon are nowhere to be seen, so just in case I'll want my two best girls out. The boys can handle themselves, but Sissy knows her way around caves and Chompy’s my heavy hitter. That way Sly stays safe too, okay girls?"
Chompy and Sissy sized up Sly, looking not specifically interested in saving the photographer’s skin, but willing at least to listen to Becca that she thought it important enough for them to keep in mind.
"Do you think we’ll run into trouble?" Ed asked. "A-and have I filled out my team too quickly?" Ed rubbed his hand on the back of his neck, having blurted out something that’d been bothering him for the last couple of days.
"You're thinking you've acted too rashly?" asked Sly, raising an eyebrow. He screwed up his face thoughtfully. "I think you’ve got a pretty well-rounded team, to be honest, not that I'm a trainer."
"I don’t think we’re looking at trouble, no," Becca replied, answering the first question, "but let’s see if there’s anything we should know before we head in. Last minute purchases won’t hurt, but the prices might not be the best." She pointed her thumb at the building. "And... no. And I can tell you why." Becca led the way over to the construction company’s building, now more an outpost for travelers before or after they passed through the tunnel, as she shook her head. "Your sponsor’s Birch, you said?"
"Yeah, same as you, right?"
"Uh huh. He’s pretty fair. He told you that he’ll pick up any overflow Pokémon and handle swapping out your team members if you need it, right?"
"Right, I just... these guys are my team! I don’t want to catch Pokémon and then just... dump them in a storage box! Who knows what that’s like? I know we’re not allowed to do that any more, but I still don’t want to catch a Pokémon only to abandon it, even if it's to a reservation or by releasing or sending it away."
Sly nodded, glad to see the young trainer’s attitude. "Glad to hear that, Pokémon are so amazing, they’re not... power tools." He threw up his hands angrily, gesturing aimlessly and wildly.
Becca nodded, agreeing with the redhead. "Mum and Dad told us how it used to be when pokéballs were first invented, and I keep hearing from grandpa what it was like in the war. I never wanted to be like that either. That’s why I only have the few Pokémon I have so far, but I know the Birch family. They take good care of any Pokémon that get sent their way; if you’re building up an extended team and spend time with all of them, even if you have to switch them out and rotate, I can say both the professor and your Pokémon won’t mind or suffer for it. Besides, once we’re both bigshot members of the Elite Four, we’ll have our own Gyms and Ranches. You’ve gotta have a lot of Pokémon to properly battle all the little kids that want your badges, right?"
"Yeah, in case one of them turns up with Surf and tries to use it to cheese your whole team!" ribbed Sly, earning a punch in the upper arm from Ed for his laughter.
"Yeah, yeah," apologized Becca, before Ed could mouth his retort, turning red. "My fault, I know." She took a deep breath, and sighed, happily. "I’m glad your folks asked mine to start my circuit again with you," she continued, "you’re like the little brother I never had."
"Thought you said you had brothers?" Sly asked, head-tilting with confusion.
"Older. And a younger sister."
"Ahh."
"I don’t have any siblings. Unless that’s why Mom and Dad want me out of the house," groused Ed.
"Then I’ll be your older sister. That way I get to boss you around."
"Ugh, don’t make it weird!"
Sly snapped a few candid photos of the two as they fought. "It’s good to show trainers when they’re not commanding their pocketable monsters," he explained at their questioning looks.
Becca laughed, then turned and knocked on the door of the house they'd been walking towards. It was opened by a large, burly woman in practical clothing who stared down at the three children expectantly.
"Yeah? You don’t need to knock, you know, come on in, come on in. Tea’s on if you want it. Your Pokémon okay?"
"We were just—" started Ed, but the woman put a hand the size of a small boulder on his back and propelled him through the doorway with a force as irresistible as the march of glaciers.
"None of that, you sprogs should take a load off before you venture into the tunnel. I doubt you came all this way for a photoshoot just to turn around and go home, yeah? Despite you being decked out for it," the woman eyed Sly, "I can spot trainers on a badge crawl a mile off."
"Any trouble in there we should know about, ma’am?" Sly asked.
"A-and are you f-from Galar?" Ed added, intimidated by the mountain of a woman.
"Aye, I’m from Galar, Motostoke if you must ask. Name’s Helen. You spotted the accent right? And naa, no trouble in the caves, kid. Least not from the Pokémon, not if you’ve got healthy specimens like those two by your side," Helen indicated the seviper and the mawile. "There shouldn’t be any human problems either." The woman nodded approvingly at Sissy and Chompy, the former curtsying whilst the latter just stared implacably before nodding imperceptibly.
"You three got names? Hey, Roy! Cup of tea and some bikkies for the kids!" Helen took a deep breath and yelled.
"Yeah, yeah, as if I don’t have enough to do!" shouted a voice from some back room, swiftly demonstrated to belong to a portly man in a safety vest and slippers. He looked more like he'd melted into the rest of his workwear than that he’d put it on that morning.
"You don’t!" yelled Helen back, as Roy disappeared into another room, before she turned back to Sly, Ed and Becca. "I know what you're wondering. Most of the workers here moved on once the tunnel excavation stopped, but a few of us stayed to monitor the Pokémon. Now we act as a waystation for you nippers on your journeys. I think I remember you before, Missy. You had some different Pokémon then."
"I’m Becca, this is Ed," said Becca, as the two children introduced themselves, shaking their tiny hands in Helen’s calloused one. "That’s Sly. We’re trainers, he’s travelling with us. Yes, I traded for Chompy here since I came through last, she’s really strong. And I caught Sissy over in Dewford, she’s amazing too! My starter and I got along well, but I met another trainer and my treecko really fell in love with him, whilst he wasn’t getting on as well with Chompy. We came to a mutual understanding."
Helen nodded as she ushered the two young trainers and their friend to a table and bid them sit, before passing out mugs of tea and a plate of biscuits that were handed to her by Roy. "It happens. We humans can usually work things out between our Pokémon, but sometimes the hardest decision is really the easiest." Helen turned to the doorway presumably to the kitchen where Roy had disappeared to. "Hey Roy! Where’s my mug?"
"Your ugly mug’s on your neck where you left it!" Roy yelled back. There was the crash of some dropped cutlery and some curses, but a few moments later Roy returned with a tray on which was several more mugs — one of which Helen took — before he disappeared up a flight of stairs. "Now let me get on with my paperwork!" he called out as he thumped out of sight.
"He’s a treasure," said Helen. "And makes a damned good cuppa."
Ed and Becca both laughed, Sly snorted into his tea.
"So, feeling good? Rested? You trainers really should stop and smell the roses occasionally."
"We did, over at the Pretty Petal Flower Shop," replied Ed. Helen chuckled at that, making a ‘tch’ noise between her teeth.
"You know what I mean. Sometimes I think the age to start going on these journeys should be raised a little. You kids are too young to be going this hard. I know you’ve got your Pokémon to keep you safe, but still." She slurped her tea, staring out the window. "I know, I know, I remember what it was like when I had a go at the whole Pokémon trainer thing. Wasn’t for me. Construction and now conservation are more my speed."
"We’ll be feeling much better after this rest, ma’am," said Becca.
"N-not that we were feeling bad before," interjected Ed. Helen sized him up before nodding slowly, taking another long slurp of her tea. She was silent for a moment, then spoke, not taking her eyes off Ed.
"So, a gastly, eh? Don’t see too many of those around here. Ghost types a-plenty in the forests back there," she jerked a thumb over her shoulder at a wall with several large windows in it that peered deep into a wooded area, "but not many kids come through with a gastly."
"We caught him in Rustboro," said Ed, somewhat surprised that the woman had spotted Guy. "Guy’s a bit shy, he was hanging around outside a pokécafe and got into a fight with Lux, my eevee."
"An eevee, huh? You don’t see too many of those around here either! Rich parents, if you don’t mind me asking?"
Ed shook his head, "caught her up near Petalburg, we... later met her dam, it’s a long story."
"Hope you don’t mind that I asked that, Ed. I’m too old to waste time being tactful and it doesn’t get you anywhere. There’s a lot of kids with eevees who didn’t outright catch ‘em, they’re popular with certain types. They don’t stay eevees long enough in my books, so you let this Lux decide what he or she wants to be, alright?"
"Alright," agreed Ed, with a small voice. Helen chuckled again.
"Don’t take offense kid, I’m not brow-beating you, just giving you the benefit of my wisdom."
"As if you had any!" floated down the stairs. Helen rolled her eyes whilst both trainers tried hard not to choke on their drinks.
"Thanks," said Ed, finally. "She’s been in her ball a while today, but she gets into trouble a lot when she’s not." He plucked the luxury ball from his belt and peered at it as he clicked the button to expand it.
"A luxury ball, huh?" Helen eyed it appreciatively.
"Another long story," added Becca. Helen snorted.
"Don’t force her out on my behalf, and I’ll tell you — eevees get into trouble, that’s what they do. If you want a docile lump you can just feed and play with, get a yamper... actually scratch that, that might just have been our yamper. Some of them need walking the entire day. Point is, all Pokémon are different, and they all have their own ways of getting along. That’s pretty much what we’re doing here; making sure the local Pokémon population are as happy as they can be with kids like you traipsing through and snatching their babies up, and picking up the pieces when they’re not. Right now though you should be fine. You’re in good time to get through the tunnel and down to Verdanturf before it gets dark, and trust me, you really don’t want to be fumbling about in the dark around either Rusturf tunnel or the outskirts of Verdanturf."
"We were camping last night on Route 116, was that okay?" Becca asked, sharing a look with Ed. "I don’t remember there being much trouble last time I was here."
"The route’s fine, but if I were you I wouldn’t hike into the mountains too far without letting anybody know where you’re going or without backup. The same’s true on the Verdanturf side. We don’t know if it’s just some powerful Pokémon that’s moved in recently or what, but," Helen leaned closer, lowering her voice, "listen, there are some Trevenants out there and not all of them like humans thanks to... well, humans being humans. One way that ghost types create more ghost types is through trainers like you, you get me? It might be something else on the other side of the tunnel, but you should keep a lookout. Head into Verdanturf smartly and don't dawdle, alright?"
"Alright," Ed and Becca both agreed, sharing a fearful look between them.
"And you stay close to them, kid, without Pokémon you’re just dead weight if you get yourself in trouble, alright?" Helen glared at Sly until he looked at the ground and mumbled an affirmative. "There’s also been some absol sightings, so do take care." Helen leaned back, and eased her expression into something lighter. "Now, we have a gift shop, a small pokémart and I can give your Pokémon a once-over if they need it..."
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