Chapter 15

Music for the Soul

I soon find a routine that works for me. Morning formation, followed by Piloting courses. Since we are being indoctrinated into the military system, no one from my class is allowed weekend to get aways. Even though I have technically earned ten weekend passes, they are not to be used within my first ninety days here on base. Again, something about establishing culture and standards. I remember these vaguely, from my past lives. Though now most of my memories are like the waking from a dream. During the dream everything is irrefutable and makes perfect sense. But then once you awaken the dream’s lack of consistency becomes easily apparent. My first few days I needed daily visits to the Dr. Charleston’s office.

Remembering his name makes me laugh as I didn’t even pay attention to it until my third time meeting with him. I had so many other things going through my mind when we first met that remembering his name was beyond me. I feel much more stable now. Also, after the last flare up between Chet and myself, where I proved I was more of a match for him, even without magic, he has left me alone. In fact, my whole class has left me alone, mostly. I still get the odd glances, but other than being stared at I am left alone. Truthfully this is far more appreciated than how things were before.

I also got my thirteenth skill, or rather my skill from this lifetime. I Chose Meditation as a skill to focus on. While I still have Acting available to learn, I decide that now is not the time to learn to lie better. So, my skills are now as follows:

Skill Name Universal Percentages and (Specializations) Linguistics 99+% Rune Crafting 99+%: (Reading/Writing: 99+%) Art 69% : (Human Painting 99%) Navigation 68%: (Astronavigation: 99+%) Musical Instrument 85+%: (Violin: 99+%) Piloting 77%: (Human Fighter Pilot: 99+%) Firearms 75%: (Blasters: 95%) Mechanical Engineering 91% Hand to Hand Combat 85%: (Human Martial Arts: 90%) Medicine 71% (First Aide: 84%) Melee Combat 68% Sneaking 65% *Meditation 32%

With the awareness of my twelve different skills, each one I spent a supposed lifetime learning. Though oddly enough once I internalized the different skills, the memories of that life ended. This is good in a way, as I no longer have the bleed over effect of having this life influenced by different past lives.

I admit looking at my skills and abilities I am a bit of a Gary Stu, super powerful at a lot of eclectic skills and powers. Oddly enough I feel like they are ones I would have wanted to study the most before I entered the Awakening Trials.

I also learned that the percentages next to both Skills and Affinities is an evaluation of where I stand versus everyone else with that skill. Also, the sub-skill can always be a lot higher than the main skill. The idea is that while I specialize in playing the violin, that will give me a base foundation of knowledge on music and how to read musical scales to play other instruments. But I won’t necessarily be as good or proficient at those other instruments.

Allegedly the system was designed in such a way to avoid conflict. There was no point to going to war, to prove who was the best at ‘X’ when your skills or Abilities clearly listed you as a higher percentage than the person you were facing. However, that is not exactly the case. See while your Skill percentage and Affinity percentage show you how good you are, or your potential based on technical components. They still don’t consider one’s personal Attributes. Thus, just because you are better than someone at a particular skill, they might be able to outperform you due to Attributes and style. The system that seems to have been designed to end arguments once and for all, has only done the exact opposite.

All this is to say that it is not just humans, but Endar, Dwenvar, and most other space faring races that have all found a temple and been indoctrinated to the system have gone to war over stupid things.

Also, it should be noted that the plus sign next to a 99% rating, like the ones for now four of my eight powers all have the 99+% rating. This is just a fancy way of saying that of everyone who has those powers I am the most powerful. There are some caveats to note. Most of the powers that I excel in are ones that are unique to humans alone, Mind Rend, Spirit, and Telekinesis. While other species do have powers that overlap, those classifications of powers are unique solely to us.

Also, a lot of the skill specialties must be divided by human categories. A reason for this is that the limitations and advantages that each race have. Take for instance painting, humans have a more limited spectrum of colors that can be used to paint from. As such the system has adjusted painting skills to be inherent to the individual space faring races, to avoid aesthetic biases. Of course, this only caused more problems later, but that is a different story.

“All right class 032522.” DI Wagner says. He has become our morning DI team lead. The class numbering is simple once you understand the pattern. The first two numbers are the month of our birth, and the last four are the year we joined. While we all were awakened in April, a few weeks ago, it is still easier to group us by our birth month. So while we all tested on the same day in April, when we were all of legal age to consent to the trials, we are still listed by our birth months for ease of records.

“I have some good news. As many of you are already aware, we achieved a full peace treaty with the Endar over five years ago. Part of the continuation of the peace treaty is to have our forces learn and train side by side.” He pauses as he lets that information sink in.

“What does this mean for you? Simple. Some of you might be able to go to Endar’s elite academy in the Thedamas system. Upon completion of two factors. The first is that you have mastery of all your powers, and second you have spent a year at the Academy. The reason for the wait is simple, we don’t want you all going over there and causing an inter-galactic incident. That said, some of your seniors have already been green-lighted to attend the Thedamas Academy, so say goodbye to them this weekend. Also of note, you will start seeing Endar here on campus this weekend.”

Sigh.

He breathes in deeply, as he covers his face for a second. Then he turns back to the class, “I will state it now, they are Endar. They are cute by all human standards and proportions. DO NOT FLIRT WITH THEM. They are fellow soldiers, and everyone you see will be your senior. You are to treat them as the seniors they are. Don’t try to talk to them. They speak Endarian, while many have learned a few words in the various human tongues, they will likely not be able to keep a conversation with you. It is not just an excuse for them to avoid talking to you. So, I repeat, do NOT CAUSE PROBLEMS. If I must get called in here over a weekend, I will make sure it is a very long WEEK for everyone. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Drill Instructor.”

He breathes in deeply. Then he gives us all the look that says, I must trust you, but I know you will all fuck this up.

He glares at us for a second. Then he asks, “are there any questions?”

“Are they single?” Donavan asks.

As soon as he says that DI Wagner rolls his eyes back and looks up to the sky with a why me look, the locks eyes with Donavan. “Look, assume for now that they are all ritualistically paired for life with a mate from birth. Assume that dishonoring that relationship would result in an honor duel to the death. Assume that their honor duels to the death are very scripted so that only an Endar can win. Also assume that should you somehow survive the duel; you will be castrated by me. If you assume ALL THIS, and are still willing to try to court one, let me know and I will begin the paperwork to help you get castrated right now?” He says looking first to Donovan, then to the rest of Chet and his group.

“Anyone want me to start the paperwork now?” He asks.

Giggle.

A few of the female cadets giggle at the comment. Hearing this, DI Wagner pounces, “the same goes for you all. Don’t think that just because you are females doesn’t mean we can’t come up with alternate means to make sure you regret somehow surviving an honor duel.” He states.

Finally, after that he looks us all over, then dismisses us for the weekend.

This is our third weekend. I personally don’t have much planned, other than calling Mel and playing my violin. She’s gotten into the habit of just listening into my playing. At first, I thought I would mind her listening in, but she is very quiet. Even when I get frustrated, at the fact that many of the songs from my visions are no longer available to me, she is still content to hear what I remember of the songs. The only song that I fully remember is Endar Rising. I even sing the versus in Endarian. Or at least I hope it is proper Endarian.

Mel and I still talk, almost daily. I have to say that I am almost thankful for the forced ninety-day separation. I needed this time to fully awaken from the different visions I had of possible lives. In a way it is sad, I literally had lifetimes worth of information at my beck and call. Now I only have a few fragments of those memories available to me. While they are more than enough to get me a head start in any life, I still feel a loss at what I know I’ve forgotten. Still, I am happy to just be me again.

I’ve unblocked my brother, though that did little good as he has now taken it upon himself to block me as well. I find the childish reaction somewhat funny. My past self, or the part of me before my Awakening would have been devastated by the sudden change. But I am a different person, while I might not be one hundred and fifty-three years old anymore, I still recognize the action for what it is. These are the actions that my mind was warning me about. He is a narcissist and will be toxic to my growth personally. Sad that it took me so many visions to realize what my subconscious apparently already knew.

Music.

I play for Mel on our hill that overlooks the sunset, in what is quickly becoming one of our daily rituals. I am really thankful for her; she is one of the few people I have confided in this whole time. She’s listened to me at my worst and has been an amazing comfort throughout.

“I hate to do this to you, but I must go soon. Before I go, can you play our song?” Mel asks, her eyes are pleading in her puppy dog look. Seeing her like that I can’t help but smile at her antics. I also feel a warmth in my chest when she says our song. We still haven’t been able to do anything physical since our stolen kiss, a kiss that she swears she wills steal back once we meet up again. But even without physical contact, just seeing her three-dimensional hologram sitting next to me, makes me feel like we are both enjoying the same moment together. Also, this is good, as it has forced us to learn about each other. I learn that she loves to garden and has taken her spare time to build a massive garden in the mansion she has purchased. She is also working on a surprise for me, which is part of why she needs to cut our current meeting short.

“For you. I would play any song you wish to hear.” I say, trying to mimic a courtly tone. Then I stand, the problem with Endar Rising, our song as she calls it, is that to sing it properly I need to have a full breath of air. I’ve been working on perfecting the song to mimic the way I remember it from my visions. It is deep and soulful, one that requires complete dedication to the moment to do properly. I think that is part of why Mel loves it so much. She says that when I sing it, she can see my soul. I don’t even know what that means, other than she thinks the song, and thereby by extension my soul is beautiful.

Taking a deep breath, I mentally prepare myself as I close my eyes. Then I enter my mind space where I heard and internalized the song.

Then on my third such Meditative breath, I begin to play.

Hmm.

The bow glides across the cords in a deep resonating tone. A sign that I am about fully begin. Then almost like hypnosis I enter my mind world and let music and sound explode from deep within me. The world fades away, until it is just me, my instrument, and the words to the most beautiful song I know.

To describe Endar Rising and experience the song are two entirely different events. The best way to describe it, is like sex. No two times are the same, but it is always great when you finish, even if it was bad. Of course, this is me trying to describe a deep spiritual event with a physical act I technically have never experienced in this lifetime. Still the lesson is the same, even when its bad, it is still good. You are still going to want to try it again, but maybe with a different partner. Or maybe a different pattern.

The song starts off with an intro, this is the foreplay of the song. This is to help both gauge the mood of your partner, in my case the instrument, and to see how in tune you are to the emotional resonance of one another. There is no set limit of time to how long the intro can last. If you are in a hurry, but in the mood to jump in, then a few quick strokes is all you need. I never allow that, even when rushed such introductions seem sloppy and tend to sour the pacing that comes after.

Next comes the rising action, I like to think of this as the initial build up. This is when you and your partner finally join as one. This is where the words in Endarian come in. The way you sing should be in alternate rhythm to your strumming. In this you are playing both male and female roles at the same time. While one rises, the other falls, like intersecting waves of energy. Ideally you only meet at the peaks, the highest point, then just stay in at the lowest point all to intersect again and again.

After the rising action is the peak. Once you have established a rhythm of complementary but opposite rising and falling actions, you change the pace. Speeding up first, then slowing down. The music leads, and it is the singing that follows, generally.

Finally comes the climax. The part where the two parts are so harmonized that they meet a point of spiritual bliss and merge in an explosion of sound and sensations. After this point, if done properly one should feel both completely exhausted and alive at the same point.

Then depending on the endurance of the participant they will try to go back to the rising action, to start the buildup process over again. I make it through the gambit three times, each time I change the pace. By the time I am done, I am sweating and panting like crazy. I look around and realize Mel already left. Looking at the time I realize I did get a little long into my playing. Mentally, I make a note to apologize for playing too long and not being able to tell her goodnight.

Still as I look around, I see a quick figure darting away like a blur. Was I being watched? I wonder, but then soon dismiss the thought. I didn’t feel any hostile intent, so it must have just been someone wandering by to listen in. It has happened on occasion, but sometimes I get someone who listens in on my practicing. Still, if anyone complains about my music, they do so where I can’t hear them.