"We still have an hour and a half of light left," Colt tells me. "And dinner won't be done until around then. My friends and I are going to the lake to go swimming, and we wanted to know if you wished to join us. Ben and his party are accompanying us for protection."

There are so many reasons I want to say "no" to this. I'll be exposed, they could steal my clothes and strand me there, they'll see my scars and I know his friends will want to ask questions, if not his brother and his brother's party, I don't feel that comfortable right now and being isolated in that situation makes me feel even less so. Among other things. There are definitely more.

This probably isn't a request, though. Colt's probably telling me that I have to come swimming with him. Fortunately, I can foist the decision onto someone else.

"And if you're worried about my friends asking about your scars," Colt whispers after checking to make sure no one's close enough to hear. His face is really close right now. "I let them know that you have some and not to stare or ask questions. I told Ben and his group the same thing. They all promised not to, so you can be a little more comfortable knowing they won't."

That doesn't reassure me. I'm still going to foist the decision onto someone else. Onto the person who taught me the word 'foist' during a brief spelling lesson after our magic lesson ended.

"Thomas and I were going to go hunting so he could see me fighting against a monster," I inform Colt. "He wants to assess my skills and see how I do before tomorrow's lessons, since we'll be hunting monsters tomorrow. You'll need to ask him."

"Oh," Colt looks surprised. "Okay, I'll go ask him."

He starts walking away.

"Why is he wanting to do that today instead of just letting him rest?" Colt mutters to himself as he walks away. "Seriously? Traveling all day wasn't enough training for Max?"

I watch as Colt talks with Thomas, who's talking with Peter at the fire. Peter's the one cooking dinner, using the deer that Daniel caught a little bit ago and some other ingredients they found and brought. Thomas looks over at me for a moment, then returns his attention to Colt and says something. Colt nods, then joins the group going to the lake.

Thomas walks over to me and gives me an amused look.

"You told me you wanted to go hunting," Thomas tells me. "And I asked if you were okay with me coming along to see how you do as it will help with tomorrow's hunts. You could have gone with him if you wanted."

Is he reprimanding me for that? If so, why is he still doing the hunt, then?

"Don't misunderstand," Thomas tells me. "You're not in trouble, Max. You could have told Colton that you were uncomfortable going swimming with that many people there, especially with not knowing some of them. He'd understand – he knows you're nervous with this many people around and that you don't trust us. Colton told me before we left the castle that he expected you to reject the modified camping trip because of your trust issues."

This is just another attempt at convincing me to trust them, isn't it? He's trying to make me feel guilty for rejecting Colt's request as punishment for doing so. Should I reverse this guilt-trip back onto him? How badly will it affect things?

"I ain't ever learned how to swim," I tell Thomas. "And it would become obvious fast if I agreed that I ain't able to swim. There's a good chance that Colt would want to teach me how to swim after that."

Though I'm not sure what all that entails, I know it probably includes being close to me. All of the training for physical stuff has so far. It would also likely mean a lot of attention on me by the others, and therefore, on my scars. Even if Colt assured me no one would stare or say anything, I don't trust that.

Just admitting I can't swim to Thomas was difficult for me, because it seems to be something every noble knows how to do. It's just another sign of my inferiority. I may be a prince, but only in name. I'm a boy from the slums.

My statement has the intended effect on Thomas, who does look a little guilty after I said that. I just hope making him feel guilty for that statement doesn't come back to bite me in the ass. That was… a little too bold of me.

"Well," Thomas says after a few moments and looking sorry. "Colton is respectful enough to back off if you tell him you don't want to do something, Max. Just remember that. And thank you for trusting me enough to confide that in me as well as to let me come along for your hunting trip, even if you do have two of your bombs still floating around, even if you're keeping one of them between us at all times."

One of these days, I really need to figure out how they can tell I have the bombs, and how more experienced people can tell what they are.

"I didn't tell ya 'cause I trust ya," I say. "I told ya so ya'd feel guilty. And I don't trust ya, Thomas. I ain't got a choice in lettin' ya come."

"Yes, you did," he says.

"Really?" I ask. "'Cause in my experience, when a noble asks ya if ya want somethin' or's okay with it, ya ain't got a choice. Ya gotta do it, and if ya don't, ya ain't gonna get off lightly. Tha's how it works. Ya are training me and shit 'cause of an arrangement we 'ave, but I ain't got a choice in lettin' ya do what ya want. Ya'll do it an'way. And if I try to-"

"Maxwell," Thomas holds up a hand, and it's not the first time he said my name during that. It is the first time he's used my unshortened name. "Hold on a few moments."

"And then there's that!" I exclaim. "Ya completely disrespect me, using the name I tell ya not to! I ain't liking that name and just want Max! But if ya want to interrupt me or be more serious, ya use Maxwell instead! Ya've never had reason to use it before and have known me as Max, so ya have no reason to switch to it just 'cause ya wanna be more serious, and-"

"Max," Thomas says, a little more forcefully than before. I really fucked up, didn't I? He's definitely angry now. "I apologize for the name thing. I try to only use it when I need your attention because you usually stop and pay more attention when I do."

"I get angry when ya do! And as proof of ya nobles doin' whatever ya want, ya refuse to call Colt by his nickname when not in formal settings, even though he keeps tellin' ya to! And he's an actual prince!"

"You're a prince, too," Thomas says.

"That doesn't count!" I tell him. "My kingdom is so far away it doesn't matter! My status as a prince of that kingdom means shit! I's an orphan from the slums, and that's all the weight I have! That's all I am! I ain't ever had a better life, and-"

"Max!" Thomas loudly says, and I shrink back a little. "I'm sorry for making you nervous, Max, and you don't need to put both of them between us along with a third. I know you're upset, because this is one of only two things that causes you to ramble like that and ignore me."

It's better if I stop, he's going to hurt me if I don't. Maybe lock me up.

"Max," Thomas says a little more calmly this time. "You're not in trouble. I can understand where you're coming from. You didn't agree to continue the agreed-upon trip because you were okay with more people coming here, it was because you felt you didn't have a choice, did you?"

"I didn't!"

"You did," Thomas says. "There are definitely nobles who are the way you're thinking, but the gods have blessed you in that you've been surrounded by ones who don't care for that. You are more than welcome to voice your opinions and refuse things. As I told you, Colton expected you to reject the modified camping trip, though he was hoping you would agree to another one in the future to make up for it. Our royal family is kind, and they will not use or abuse you. They hope you will work for the kingdom, but they will not force you to.

"They know you plan on leaving on an adventure," he continues. "And you had no way of knowing this, but Colton has been scouring the library and pestering our librarians looking for rumors of wonders he thinks you might be interested in looking for once you leave. Colton honestly just wishes to be your friend, especially since you're someone who can grow just as fast as him."

I'm growing faster than him because they're restricting his growth.

"I know you don't trust anyone but Hailey," Thomas says. "But I do hope you one day trust us as well, even if Colton just as your friend and me as a trainer and Colton's bodyguard."

"I don't trust Hailey," I say. "I don't trust anyone. Only the gods have my trust, and those ain't people, those are… something else entirely. Beings far above us."

"You don't trust Hailey?" Thomas raises an eyebrow. "You trust her to follow through on your agreement. She could take advantage of your kindness and not follow through on her end of the deal with you. Many people will betray an agreement even if it's with someone superior to them. That's trust, Max."

"That's not trust," I say. "Trust is when you believe someone is going to do what you expect or agreed on. Trust is when you believe someone is the way you think. Belief suggests there's lack of absolute knowledge. I don't believe she will do what we have agreed on. I know she will. Hailey will honor any agreement she believes is fair – or one she knows she'll get more out of. All she has to do is ask around for stories and then tell them to me, and she gets training that lets her start working her way out of the slums and take her charges with her. She sees that as her benefiting more than it benefits me. I don't trust that she will follow through, I know she will. There is no doubt or belief involved, that is simply how Hailey is."

Thomas looks like he wants to say something, but ultimately decides against whatever it is with a small shake of his head.

"Okay, Max," Thomas says. "I can tell you're still uneasy and uncomfortable, even after I told you what I did. You don't trust me enough to believe me, and it's doubtful you will ever stop being suspicious."

"Being suspicious saves lives," I say.

"It can also ruin relationships," Thomas says. "If you don't trust whoever you get with, it will drive a wedge between you and you'll eventually find yourself alone again. You're able to leave the slums and I know you're planning to. From your comments, I know you find at least Colton cute. When you're older, you may want a relationship. I'm not saying to blindly trust people, Max, but sometimes, it's okay to give a little bit of trust while remaining suspicious, until you know them well enough to not need to be suspicious. I know that might take you years for any individual person, Max, but it's something to think about."

He does have a little bit of a point. That doesn't mean I'll do it, though. Right now, I want to focus on getting stronger and preparing to leave to go explore things. I can worry about buying a home and getting a boyfriend after I've done a lot of adventuring. Maybe after I've found my family, I might be willing to look for a relationship.

Though I probably won't give trust like he's suggesting. I don't trust because trust can be betrayed. When trust is betrayed, it can result in disaster.

"So," Thomas says. "I want you to base what happens next on every interaction you've had with us the last few weeks. I'm asking for a small amount of trust from you on this, Max. Are you really okay with me coming along with you for the hunting trip? If you aren't, then I will let you go. As long as you don't go too far, you won't encounter anything that's too strong for you. Considering you no doubt want to be back when dinner is ready seeing as our holdover meal wasn't much, I know you're unlikely to go that far from here."

This is another trick, isn't it? But what if I'm dishonest and say I'm okay with him coming with me and he gets angry at me for lying? Either answer screws me, doesn't it? It's better to be honest with my answer, then.

"I want to go alone."

"Okay," Thomas says, then indicates a direction. "There's a monster that way that will do well for you for this hunt, a type of magical bear. The beast is called a gaia bear, and it uses earth magics quite well. You'll no doubt gain at least a couple of Levels from it."

Is he actually giving me advice, or is he sending me to a deathtrap? This is probably his way of punishing me. Or what if he's telling me this just so that I won't go that way and get a good kill, because I told him I didn't want him to come along?

"One last thing," Thomas says. "Is there anything you want to do or learn during this training camp? Most of it is focused on Benjamin, Elise, and Colton, but this is also for Peter, Aaron, Cyrus, Nicholas, and you. I want to make sure there's a least a little bit for you, considering your growth and how much you're grinding out Levels."