Eli tried to stand and get out of the way as the others moved to Wybert’s side, but his body rebelled, and his legs shook in warning. Plopping down again on the ground to rest more, he pulled his legs into his chest. He definitely didn’t want to faint after all that effort and decided to relax for a bit since it wasn’t like there was a rush anymore.

Dara was the first to reach her father’s side and grabbed his hand as he stirred. Wybert grimaced, his eyelids scrunched closed as if to escape a bright light. Then suddenly, his eyes opened as he scanned around the room, moving from person to person before settling on Dara. His sharp gaze clouded with confusion, “Daralis? Little Fire? What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be with Duarte?” The question sounded innocent and bewildered as Wybert tried to make sense of the world.

Her hand tightened with tears in her eyes as she looked him over. “Dad…it’s so good to see you.” She blinked, her other hand moving up as she tried to slyly wipe the moisture away. “How do you feel?”

“Like a giant torc…no, a herd of giant torc ran over me,” Wybert said, his words barely a mumble. His eyes slowly closed. “So tired.” His breathing deepened as soon as his eyes closed, and light snores followed.

A quick snort from Tanca caught Eli’s attention, but Tanca just shook his head with a slight smile, “My lord can truly sleep anywhere.”

The man and woman from earlier returned to the bedside as they started to fuss around Wybert. The woman focused on the stomach bandage while the man had his hand near the chest wound, and they started murmuring to each other as they worked.

Tanca stepped over and extended a hand down to Eli, who grasped it as he tried to stand. It was more Tanca pulling than him standing under his own power, and Eli swayed for a moment once he made it to his feet. Tanca steadied him with a hand as Dara and Ghlan stepped to their side, and they all watched the two apprentices at work.

After some time, they declared that Wybert was healthy but exhausted. Even as the two described Wybert’s condition to Ghlan and Dara, their eyes returned to Eli. It made him feel uncomfortable, that kind of attention – like some new weight had landed on his shoulders. He simply nodded along with their words before his mind started to wander, and he lost track of what they were saying. It had been a long day, and he couldn’t help yearning for a bed and a big plate of food – hopefully not in that order.

The group continued talking about whatever had got them so excited, but Eli found a nice empty spot along a convenient wall and leaned back as his yawns threatened to dislocate his jaw. Dara must have noticed and helpfully summoned a young man to help find him a room and dinner. Eli nodded to the group, his face flushing as all present bowed at the waist toward him while Dara threw him a grateful smile.

He didn’t even crack a joke but gave the room a little wave before quietly following the servant as they left. A few minutes later, after going down a hallway, up a flight of stairs, and down another short passage, the young man opened a door at the end of a long hall. Eli nodded thanks while covering his mouth as a truly prodigious yawn sought its freedom.

His room was a bit smaller than the one in Ute’s Lodge, but at the size of a large hotel suite, it was more than large enough for his needs. There was a big bed with folded linens near the room’s only window, a heavy wooden table set against one wall, and two chairs tucked underneath. The walls were bare with no artwork or pictures, but only a grey smooth color from floor to ceiling, reminding him of a prison cell. At least the ceiling’s dark wooden beams overhead helped break up the monotony.

He made a quick pit stop in his washroom, a small square space barely more than two meters on a side through a narrow doorway in his room. Unlike his room’s main door, he had to duck slightly upon entry, realizing that he’d have to watch his head around some of this world’s doors. It hadn’t been a problem before, with many seemingly built with people like Tanca in mind, but the smaller door was a good reminder unless he wanted to brain himself on some unassuming door frame.

The bathroom’s focus was a small wooden cylindrical soaking tub. It looked like the bather was supposed to crouch down into the water to submerge themselves as opposed to the rectangular-shaped bathtubs he was used to. Regardless, there was no way he would fit in the little thing built more for someone Wybert or Dara’s size. Pulling a dangling chain released lukewarm water out of a single ceramic pipe hanging over the side of the tub, but only a couple of liters came out each time he pulled. A small wooden shelf had a few small bowls with different substances on one wall, and he sniffed them carefully before smiling at the faint floral scents. The only other feature was a porcelain bowl and cover in one corner, more than simple enough for him to figure out how to use them even if he found the idea a bit gross. There weren’t even any decorations on the walls to distract him while doing his business, and he could only stare at the same smooth grey walls.

A knock came just as he finished washing his hands with a bit of the floral soap and tepid water. Opening his door, he yawned as two servants entered with plates of food, a jug, and two cups.

Eli’s dinner was a little surreal, time losing meaning as he barely kept his eyes open while stuffing some food into his mouth. He wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but it tasted like beef someone had cooked to death. There was also some stale bread with a small bowl of a strange-looking spread, but he didn’t worry about it as he continued chewing away almost mechanically.

Delaying as much as possible, it was only when he almost faceplanted into his plate that he finally decided to make up his bed with the provided linens. It wasn’t like he had a choice outside eating some Mana Candy, which would just be putting off the inevitable. So, he screwed up his courage, blew out the lamp they’d left him, and almost immediately fell asleep.

***

Eli gasped awake as he sat back in his chair and rubbed the side of his face where the edge of his keyboard had left a mark while wiping away a bit of drool.

“Ugh, again?” he muttered, somehow both proud and ashamed of falling asleep while working. His monitors displayed his latest model, where the scenario generation had paused automatically when his computer detected his inactivity. After working on the damn thing for weeks as he tweaked the regressions and assumptions, he knew he was close to making it all fit the way he wanted, but one damn variable kept screwing with him. He didn’t want to plug a number this time, no matter how much easier it would make the whole thing.

“Shit, Esme’s going to kill me,” he said after glancing at the corner of his screen. He jumped up, grabbed his jacket off the back of the chair, and pulled out his phone to call her. “And, of course, I missed her call. Double shit!” He tried her number, but it went directly to voicemail. Trying two more times returned the same result. Checking his messages, he swore at how many he’d missed and sent a quick reply letting her know he was on his way.

“It’s your fault I died, Eli,” a familiar voice said behind him.

He turned as the world blurred before he found himself on the side of a dark freeway. Distant streetlamps cast long shadows on a line of cars stopped in traffic behind a scene of devastation. Two vehicles had collided with one silver car absolutely demolished – almost split in two near the driver’s side door. Emergency lights danced as a young man frantically worked on someone lying nearby on the grassy median while another body lay limp against the concrete barrier within a pool of blood.

“You should have kept your promise, Eli. Why didn’t you come to get me? Why did you leave me to die?” The familiar voice asked again, though it now sounded muffled.

The body near the barrier moved as it slowly stood up and turned towards him, and he backed away in fear, images of a zombie or monster running through his mind. The thing was somehow in deep shadow, even with the nearby streetlamp and vehicle headlights shining brightly. Only when it was a handful of meters away, its head tilted too far with one side smashed, did the face become recognizable.

“Esme…” he whispered, suddenly nauseous from the guilt and shame rising from his gut.

“Your fault! Everyone dies around you. Everyone! First, it's your parents and sister. All your friends from school, teachers, classmates – everyone you grew up with are dead. Yet you walk away with barely a scratch. Let’s not forget about your grandma since she died quickly enough once she’d saved your ass. Oh, and then those two soldiers after the Fall. Killing your own allies, Eli?”

He tried to back up further, but something stopped him. A glance back showed nothing, but his searching hands felt a smooth, solid surface like an invisible barrier.

“I guess that’s what I get for agreeing to marry a cursed man,” Esme spat as she finally reached him, a trail of dark blood marking her path. “You’re a curse! If fate doesn’t kill people fast enough, you’ll speed things along. Face it, you’re nothing but a killer.”

“No, it’s not like that. I’m sorry, Esme. I’m so sorry.” he said, barely choking the words out as tears trailed down his cheeks.

“Who will you kill next, Eli? Is it going to be Dara or maybe her father? How long will they survive near a cursed man? How many have you killed in the last week, Killer?”

***

Eli gasped awake as he sat up, breathing in and out a few times as his pulse thudded in his ears. He looked around but didn’t recognize the room immediately; nearly pitch dark with only a sliver of silvery light breaking through one small window. After a few more moments of confusion, his eyes adjusted enough that the angular shape across the room resolved into a table and a mess of dishes. Last night came back to him, recognizing the guest room they’d given him, and he sat there as he focused on his heartbeat while reminding himself that it was only a dream.

Every time I’ve slept since I got here. Every damn time.

Back home, he’d had recurring nightmares too, but they’d become more infrequent over the years. He’d completely weaned himself off the sleep meds around the same time he’d kicked the other prescriptions to the curb a few years ago. Then coming here, the nightmares returned with a vengeance. They were so different here.

They’re so damn real. Maybe the magic and mana also impact my dreams? That wouldn’t be the craziest thing since I got here. Hell, that wouldn’t be the strangest thing I’ve seen in the past day. Still, what could be the cause if not magic?

He thought back to last night and his utter exhaustion – like pulling an all-nighter, but without the caffeine. The healing had also been much more challenging than when he’d healed Dara. Still, he’d had enough sleepless nights to know that physical fatigue had never caused such crazy dreams on Earth. Another option was the new aura ability he’d somehow gained, but that didn’t make a lot of sense either since the nightmares happened every time he slept. No, there had to be something else at play here, but he wasn’t sure since there were simply too many unknowns at the moment. As usual, he could only add the mystery to his mental list of open questions.

Getting up from his bed, Eli walked over in just his undergarments to the tiny single window as the dawn slowly lightened the world outside. He struggled a bit with its strange latch, trying to let in some fresh air. He’d never seen a leather tie holding a window closed, but he finally figured it out as he swung the waist-high window outward.

A smile tugged at his lips as he studied the opening set deep into the thick stone wall. If they’d added iron bars with his room's already bare grey walls, he might have thought he was in a prison cell. He figured it was built for defense, even with him a few floors off the ground, since it would be a tight squeeze for even the smaller adults he’d seen here. It was too bad they hadn’t built the window for the view because the little he could see was impressive.

The cold air helped Eli wake up as he looked outside at the slowly waking countryside. With the fortress atop the highest hill around, he had a partial light show as the dawn’s beams cast long shadows along the land below. Standing there for some time, he studied the vibrant, colorful plots of various crops in the distance sprinkled like tiny jewels beyond the hills. Nearby, groves of trees with little bare patches at the edges showed where the locals likely did their logging. In the other direction, a few roofs near the window’s edge revealed a small portion of the village below.

Closing his eyes while taking in a few calming breaths, he heard the sound of water, realizing it was likely the jewel-like river out of sight from this angle. Listening to his heartbeat and a few waking birds calling from outside his window, he tried to lose himself in finding the moment's stillness. After running from crisis to crisis for days, trying to get somewhere safe, he and Dara had made it.

How often do I take such a simple thing as this for granted? When was the last time I did this? Back home, I was in such a hurry. I was always racing to the next thing, hell, even joining the Beta for Guide…what the hell was I thinking signing off on that? I know that the last thing I wanted was to stop and think. Now though, I’m in a world of magic. Who knows what is possible here. If this is real, could I have a second chance at life? Could I leave that other shit behind?

He stepped over to the wooden table and chairs set against the wall and stacked up the dirty dishes from last night. Taking a seat in one of the chairs, he ran his hands along the wooden surface, his hands tracing along the grain.

Everything is so real. I don’t think I can see this as a dream anymore. It was a nice fantasy, but this is just too much now. I guess there’s no point denying it. I seem to be here regardless. So, what’s next?