knock. knock. knock.

i'd walk over to my door and open it slightly, peeking through the slot to see who it is. you'd stand there awkwardly with your hands in your pockets and your eyes staring at the floor.

'what are you doing here?' i would ask. it's 2 a.m. and you shouldn't be here. you would shrug and shake your head and look around the place like you didn't know how you got here. 'i don't know,' you would reply quietly. i would sigh and open the door, inviting you in. you'd look at me with a searching look before you entered, and when i closed the door you would turn off the lights in my room.

i wouldn't say anything and instead would watch as you ran your hand through your hair, hesitating and trying to gather your thoughts. you'd try and think of something to say to me, but there were always no words. so i'd grab your hand and lead you to the bed, pulling you down with me and pressed your body against mine. we wouldn't move or say anything; we'd just make sure to remove the space between us and let our bodies tightly come together. then i'd let you cry soundlessly into my chest and i'd rub your back gently, letting the darkness engulf us as you exhaled out all your pain.

the problem is, the pain wasn't going anywhere. you'd come here and we'd lay in each others arms and you'd cling onto me tightly hoping to rid your sorrows somehow. but the pain wasn't vanishing; it was being transferred. to someplace else. to someone else. to me.

oh darling, don't you see what happened here? i lost my mind trying to find yours.