I can’t believe she won’t even admit to herself that she is a lesbian. It’s been about a day since she even entertained the idea but already she is going out with her best friend. My best friend wouldn’t even join the navy in case the boys were more interested in each other than her. It’s so damned unfair!

On Friday we hang out with some of our friends during the breaks, no point in being too pushy when a friendship is just starting. The day has passed quickly and we only have one subject left before we get to go swimming. We are playing a quick impromptu game of piggy in the middle with Myriam’s bag. It's probably cruel and nasty but she's smiling so I don't feel too bad and it gets us across the playing field to the gym. When we get there she stupidly opens the can of coke from her bag though and karmic retribution covers us all in the sticky black liquid. I choose to believe she didn't do it on purpose.

We enter the gym and quickly put on our gear before the changing rooms get crowded. PE is by far my favourite subject, apparently, in later years it involves learning but just now we are just playing games. Last week we had volleyball, something I had never played, watched or been interested in before but after an hour playing it, I could say at least that it was fairly fun. I'm hoping today will be equally interesting.

The teacher seems pleased to see us, "Ah, girls. Glad to see you got here early, you can help set up!" Oh, joy. "Grab some cones and put three on the line on either side of the gym. One in each corner and one in the middle of the line." Interesting, I wonder what this game is. At least the setup is easy.

We hang around, quite literally, waiting for the rest of the class. I challenged the girls to a chin-up competition and it appears I'm the only one who could do more than five. Poor little Myriam can't even manage one, she even had to be lifted to the bar! When some of the boys arrive they join in, spoiling my fun. Mohamid easily doubles my count and he does all his faster than I did mine.

Once the rest of the class arrives the teacher leads us through some warm-up exercises, I try not to laugh when some of the class are panting just from the warmups. Eventually, though, the teacher gets to explaining what we are about to do. Apparently, we are doing the beep test, you have to reach the other side of the gym, crossing the line before the next beep. It starts off so slow that you can walk it easily but before long you have to jog, then run. By the time there are only ten of us left we are sprinting and sliding to a halt at each end a voice calls levels every time the beeps speed up. At level 10 there are only three of us, at eleven only myself and a boy whose name I don't know. I drop out before level 12 but he keeps going, very nearly making it to level 13.

We all give him a round of applause when he finally fails, even the teacher is impressed. "Okay, that is your base level, we are going to do this again once each term. I want to see an improvement in everyone's score by the end of the year. I expect every single person to reach at least level 9 by then. To facilitate this we will be alternating sprints and longer runs at the beginning of each class alongside our warmups." There were groans following this announcement but having done swimming class for a number of years I am quite happy with the exercises. "Okay, I need someone to clear up the cones and can someone else grab the bag of balls from the closet, we will finish off the day with boys vs girls dodgeball." Oh yeah! I've watched this movie, if you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball! The four D's dodge, duck, dive and dodge some more. Or, you know, something like that. It was a funny movie.

By the end of class, I was glad I had swimming practice before dinner. I stank.

I took the public bus to the pool with Becky, she stank too but I didn't mention it, we just sat in our own miasma, not talking much until we reached the pool. Even then we stripped, changed and showered quickly and quietly before getting in the pool. We have about fifteen minutes before our practice starts but I think we are just too tired to lark about. We stand in the shallow end chatting until the coach arrives. He isn't impressed at our times, nor our lack of enthusiasm and that just makes him work us harder. I want to call him bad names but I'm just too damned knackered.

Mum drops Becky home, it's out of our way but not too far. I'm almost asleep by the time we get home. By the time dad has dinner ready I am fully asleep on the couch and damn but its hard to wake up enough to eat dinner, it’s even more annoying that for some reason I am absolutely not hungry, I poke the tagliatelle carbonara around the bowl with my fork getting angry looks from mum. I do manage about half, by that time though the creamy sauce is congealing and the pasta is all clumping together. It’s enough for mum to let me leave the table though so I excuse myself and go to my bedroom.

Before I have a chance to fall back to sleep fully clothed on my bed mum comes in. “Are you alright Kelly? It's not like you to be off your food.” God, I could do without her pestering me.

“Yeah, just knacked. PE and then swimming, it’s pretty tiring.” She nods and starts idly picking up my dirty laundry from the floor.

“You really should tidy this room. There is no way I’m letting you have friends around with it in this state.” Who’s she kidding? I never have friends around and the only friend I would invite owns a games console so why would she want to come to my boring house. I don’t even have a TV in my bedroom!

“Yes, mum.” I say in a tired voice, come on get the hint and bugger off so I can sleep, please?

“Your sister asked me if you would be allowed to join her for movie night.” What? That gets my attention and I sit up on the bed. “They are watching a fairly adult film so I’m not sure I should let you.” Okay, I wasn’t hugely interested in the boring old films, but if there is one way to make me want to do something it’s to tell me I might not be allowed to. Damn, is she actually using reverse fucking psychology on me or is she actually reluctant to let me watch it? “It has sexual themes that I’m not sure you will be ready for.”

“Oh god! Not another ‘Talk’ please, was the golden showers one not enough for one week?” I plead, actually holding my hands clasped in front of me.

“That depends, are you okay with the subjects of homosexuality and transgender?” I actually laugh out loud and her eyebrows raise.

“If that’s all then sure, come on mom, get with the times!” Please, just leave it at that, my poor psyche can't handle you explaining lesbianism to me!

“Hmm...” she eyes me suspiciously for a moment. “Okay, but if there are things you need explained, come and ask me. Okay?”

Yeah right! “Sure, no problem.” I manage to say with a straight face.

She is about to leave, having tidied my bedroom more than I have in the last month but I remember something. “Hey, mum?” She turns to me in the doorway, “Can you please add Charlotte to my friends list? She’s getting a new prosthetic tomorrow and I think she might like to talk.”

Mum smiles and looks around my room for my tablet, I pull it from under my pillow and hand it to her, “That's sweet of you. Do you know her email address?” Charlotte had written it down for me so I just handed mum the paper. She hands me back the tablet and says good night.

As I put the tablet back under my pillow I shake my head. Hell…movie night? I honestly didn’t see that coming, I’m normally a pariah when Anne has her gatherings.

I had thought that being included in Anne's social life was what I wanted, now that it has happened though I find myself getting nervous, there's a knot in my stomach and suddenly I can't sleep. I'm still really tired but I can't seem to switch off, I don't know most of Anne's friends, what if they don't like me? What if I make a fool of myself. I keep going through scenarios and possible conversations in my head, god I'm pathetic.

Its midnight before I drift off. My dreams are just a replay of my thoughts, just more real and way more scary.

Okay, Anne’s just gone and picked up her girlfriend from her house and mum actually instructed them to go upstairs to her bedroom. I just know what they're going to be up to. I should wait patiently for as long as I dare then creep up and surprise them… nope can't wait. Apparently I don't have patience! Not a Kelly trait.

I open the bedroom door and pounce, yep, Abby is on top and making kissy noises, "I knew it! When I heard mum say that I thought 'they're off to snog!' and you were too! Man, you're so lucky." I hop up on the bed, "don't let me stop you, carry on!" The look on their faces is priceless.

"Kelly, we're not kissing with you here." Not that I expected them to, or even wanted them to, I'm just messing with them. "Anyway, we were just messing around, we weren't kissing, not really." Yeah, yet!

"Not yet." Abby echoed my judgement.

"Jeez Anne, you're so lucky, you find out you like girls and two days later you're dating your best friend. How can't I have a best friend who's into girls!" I suddenly see the confusion on her face, oh shit.

"What?" Abby asks, her head flicking between me and my sister. No way. No absolute way she didn’t tell her. Holy crap, I think my respect for my sister just went up about 12 notches!

"Oh wow, you didn't tell her? Damn I feel dumb now, I felt for sure she would tell her best friend."

"I think Anne wanted to let you tell me Kelly, so, how about you start from the top?" Abby is obviously getting queues from Anne, some kind of friend telepathy.

I move to face Abby, intentionally excluding Anne from the conversation with my body. Now, how to swing this one. Glib, I think, yep make light of it. "So, it began with my nosy sister reading my diary." I look to see how this goes over with Anne, wow, I think she actually feels bad for reading my diary, I narrow my eyes, it's totally not going to stop me searching your room. "It turns out me admitting I like girls made her jealous and she decided to be cool like me." I have a little think, but I’m pretty sure that's enough to say without incriminating myself. "That's pretty much it. There was stuff about us both being perverts and stuff but, yeah, that's mainly it."

Abby then suggests I talk to their ‘Wank advisor’ who I understand is this lesbian they talked to. She gets a huge wallop for that one, for once Anne actually didn't pull her punches!

Okay, nobody told me there would be a real life out and proud lesbian coming tonight. She's pretty cool too, all laid back and casual, mum is getting on really well with her, though I'm sure I caught dad giving her the stink eye. I wonder why.

I have to admit, I actually really like Anne's friends, they're all nice to me and really funny. I wonder if Anne gave them the hard word 'be nice to my sister or else' I wouldn't put it past her. Thinking back to the other movie nights I guess perhaps I just didn't socialise enough for them to be nice. Anne usually steers me clear of them and mum is happy for me to stay away. I'm pretty sure I embarrass them both.

I'm sure I'm being too quiet but I can't seem to find anything interesting enough to say. I don't know what they all like or what hobbies they have, I only really know a couple of their names.

Anne's new friend saunters up to me, "Pretty intimidating eh?" She doesn't look intimidated.

"Erm, yeah. I don't normally hang out with Anne's friends."

She nods, "Me too, if Anne hadn't talked to me first there's no way I would have talked to them. They're the cool popular kids, I'm the weird loner."

I frown, "Really? 'Cos you seem far cooler than them to me! You project this... confidence."

She smiles and raises her glass to me. "Thanks. Fake it till you make it." She looks left and right then leans in and whispers, "I am absolutely bricking it. This is my first big girls sleepover thing ever!"

I smile and whisper back, "Mine too. Here's to losing our sleepover virginity together."

We chink glasses and she sniggers. "I just hope it doesn't hurt!"

We are distracted by Heather coming around with a pizza, Anne proudly announces she made the pizza dough.

"Wow, this pizza is magnificent!" The lesbian girl says, I feel really bad, I can't even remember her name.

"Em, I'm Kelly by the way." I say, offering my hand to shake.

"Oh, sorry, I'm Jo." She replies, juggling her plate and glass before wiping her hand on her jeans and then shaking my hand with an amazingly firm grip.

At first I thought Jo was a swimmer, she has the shoulders for it but she tells me she runs and lifts weights. That is pretty cool, I've never met a girl weightlifter before.

"I could probably bench press you!" She tells me when I ask how heavy the things she lifts are. I'm not sure I believe her but that's like hulk level awesome.

Dad's pizzas are great, as per usual, except the yucky prawn one. Even seeing them on the pizza gives me the shivers, yucky sea crickets. I'm pretty sure Anne's friends only eat it to squick me out.

After the pizza is done one of the girls connects her phone to the Bluetooth on dad's stereo and they all start singing and dancing to some pop song I've never heard. See mum, this is why listening to the same music as your peers is important. That said, it is really shit. I get up and join the dancing though and the Asian girl, Mae I think her name is, takes pity on me and shows me some weird sirroc dancing, it involves lots of hand holding and spinning but really doesn't seem to go with the music. She tells me between songs that her parents met at dance classes so they dance with her at home all the time.

"That was so much fun!" She tells me when we finally move upstairs. I'm not quite so sure but I nod enthusiastically just to be nice. I nip into my room to change into my pyjamas, suddenly all my nightwear looks old and ratty or like a five year old bought it. I'm standing naked for way too long peering into my drawer, to heck it, own the little kid vibe! I pull out my unicorn onesie and pull it on, pulling the hood up too. Oh geez I look dumb. I take that off and pull on a nightie. Nope, it's faded and worn and makes me look like a crazy person. No way I'm wearing the Frozen pyjamas. Nothing for it, I'm pretty sure I heard Anne talking upstairs.

I sneak out into the hall and across to her room. A quick rummage in her drawer and I find a tasteful set with blue bottoms and a grey long sleeved t-shirt with a low curved neckline. I crack the door and check nobody is looking before running to my room. I stand on some Lego on the way in and oh my god it hurts, there are tears in my eyes and I want to scream and shout but I bite my tongue and try to harden up. Hopping on one leg I pull on the pyjamas and then sit at my desk to massage my sore foot.

Right, time for action... I try to make myself move, somehow that knot is back and I don't go anywhere. I sit by my desk, contemplating just going to bed. No. You've met them Kelly, the hard part is done, this is just sitting and watching a movie. Easy. I pull myself to my feet and briefly wonder why my heart is beating so fast but before I can change my mind I hurry out and up the ladder to the loft.

The girls are all up in the cinema room by the time I pop my head in, I force myself to be confident. "So, truth or dare, spin the bottle or sexy pillow fights first?" That seems to have broken the ice, I duck as what seems like at least a dozen pillows sail directly towards my head. Anne is glaring at me but isn't saying anything, she obviously recognises the pyjamas. Well, it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission. I think someone famous said that, Gandi or someone.

Anne is putting on the DVD and I snag a drink and popcorn, I actually hate popcorn, I think it tastes like burnt cardboard but when in Rome. Holy crap! It's a proper adult themed movie, I thought Mum was just being Mum but Rocky Horror? Hell yes!

OMG it is so funny! Even better, because of dad and his golden oldies I know almost all the songs. We're all dancing and singing along, if all her movie nights are like this I want in! I notice her and Abby snuggling, I'm pretty sure everyone else does too. That's fine, she's totally going to be outed before long, which suits me fine.

The movie ends way too early, I would have loved just to play it again but Anne puts on Time Bandits. I love the movie but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be allowed to make it nowadays, damn, suddenly I can't recall if they like being called midgets, dwarfs or little people now. For some reason that bothers me and I'm totally distracted from the movie. I start watching people, they all seem enthralled in the movie but Anne and Abby keep sneaking glances at each other. Heather has this thing about constantly twirling her curls around her fingers and then sucking the ends during exciting bits. Mae is chest down on the beanbag and kicking her legs, occasionally I see all her toes curl and then do this weird splaying motion where she wiggles her big and small toes.

Susan and Jo are both boring, they just sit and drink coke, occasionally sharing a smile at the funny bits. They do look cool, that's how I want to look. Jenny looks almost asleep, she's snuggled into her sleeping bag and is on her side hugging the beanbag.

I managed at some point to return my attention to the movie and I enjoy it, even if it is a little well worn by now. There was a time when I watched it over and over, so often that my parents would hide the DVD.

The girls are suitably shocked at the ending when Kevin's parents explode. It was funny watching their reactions. I'm pretty sure Jenny was actually asleep because she only acted shocked after a fairly long delay!

What? Hold on, did I hear that right? I think I just got invited to the next movie night! She certainly seems to be asking me to put a movie title in the bag. Holy crap. Shit, my mind has gone blank too. I take the pen and paper as it is passed to me, Susan is having a tirade about her film never being picked. Damnit, the only old films I can think of are kids ones or the previous ones from movie night. I almost write Debbie does Dallas as I know where dad has that gem stashed but I doubt we would get permission to show it and I know from experience that you would hear the soundtrack pretty well downstairs!

Anne is looking at me expectantly now. Damnit, I'll just write Suzan's option down and that will be fine.

There is a pretty awful drumroll and out comes… my piece of paper! Damn, I can see the handwriting and it is definitely mine! I just hope this Bowie film is good. Susan is stoked which I guess is a bonus.

Anne plays the adult and makes us all get ready for bed, at least she doesn't kick me out, I really hadn't expected to have this much fun. After I brush my teeth I come back to find Jo tuning dad's old guitar, I can't even remember the last time he played it.

“There’s a stool in the cupboard over here, dad says it's easier to play if you sit up right.” I hand her the little three legged stool and she sits down and plays. Holy crap she is awesome, I didn't know that guitar could sound like that. I sit, mesmerised watching her fingers on the strings. She finishes whatever song she was playing as Susan comes in.

“How long have you been playing? That was so amazing!” I ask her.

“Oh, since I was little. Apparently I wanted a guitar for my sixth birthday so my dad got me a little travel guitar second hand and one of his friends from work came around once a week for a beer with Dad and showed me how to play chords.” She did a little rift on the guitar, “Every time he sees me he tells me how I played better than him by my seventh birthday. It's rubbish of course, he plays really well!”

It sounded like a really happy memory, I kind of wish I could play an instrument. She launches into another song and this time I know it, it's one of the songs I like from dad’s playlists, Lake of Fire, it has this cool bend and fast high pitched bit that look and sound amazingly hard to play. She is singing softly and I so want her to belt it out like Kurt Cobain does.

She sings another song, this time something I don’t know but it sounds like dad would love it. It's sad and slow, she said it was Hallelujah but it's certainly not the version I know. Once that is finished she offers the guitar around but nobody else plays.

Not wanting the music to end I find myself suggesting I could sing, god where did that come from? Oh well, Anne tells me not to sing too loud, apparently it's after midnight! I start singing ‘I Wish I was a Punk Rocker’, I think i'm getting most of the words right, Jo comes in after the first verse with a palm muted chinking on the strings, holding the beat for me, it’s actually quite fun, the girls look like they are enjoying it. After a few verses Jo transitions into actual chords but she also taps the guitar to make a drumming noise. She obviously knows the song because she stops playing exactly on time for the last line, just like in the real thing. I’m pretty sure people loved it, though that could have been Jo’s guitar.

There is talk of singstar next weekend at Jenny’s, I'm pretty sure I'm not invited. I mean, why would she, I’m not her friend, it would be nice though.

I wake the next morning to find it's just me, Abby and Jo left in the room. It's obvious from the quiet conversation in the corner that they are waiting for me to wake up. I pull myself out of my sleeping bag and rub my bleary eyes. “Sup?” I ask in my most intelligible and comprehensible yawn speak.

Abby laughs and calls me over. “I thought you may like a private conversation with our tame lesbian over here.”

Just then Anne pops her head up through the hatch. Holy shit she scared me! "Heavy conversation?" She asked, "breakfast is on, bacon rolls or muesli are the only options."

"Just introducing Kelly to your masturbation guru." Jo seemed quite amused at the title.

"Great, well, come down when you're ready." She said, not rising to the bait.

"I'm starting to wonder whether every girls she knows is either a lesbian or bi-sexual." Jo said under her breath.

"Really?" Abby asked, there must be more to this, I find myself wondering if the girls were flirting with Jo, or perhaps even each other, for her to say that.

Jo quickly ran through her personal history, it turns out she was no more knowledgeable than me, just a little bit more experienced. It did amaze me when she admitted that she was still a virgin, firstly holy crud that's private, secondly holy crap why wouldn't every girl in school be throwing themselves at her? She’s hot, nice, and talented. Shit… what chance have I got...

She did suggest coming out to my parents might be easier and less drama than coming out at school. It did make me wonder, admitting it to Anne had actually been a big relief, I now had someone to talk to. Hell, now I had three people to talk to, thinking about it I realise that I am happier than I have been for a very long time.

We are about to head for breakfast when I have an idea, "What about internet dating?" I asked, thinking at least I could come out in an anonymous forum and talk to girls my own age about my feelings.

"Oh hell no, apparently almost all teenage lesbians online are actually middle aged men!" Jo responded and suddenly I cringed, shivers running down my spine, of course, the same anonymity I wanted worked the other way! Yeah, big nope on that idea!

I had been talking to Charlotte on social media right up until I joined the party last night. She was absolutely stoked with her new limb, she had been partly excited and partly nervous all morning up until the appointment but that had entirely turned into euphoria the moment she found she could do standing jumps and the leg cushioned the landing. She had spent the afternoon walking and running up and down a sports hall with a physiotherapist watching her. It was a big change but way easier than she had expected.

She invited me over to play this morning, I had not been on a ‘playdate’ for ages and really didn't want to call it that. I asked her if we could clarify, play… tennis? She laughed, or rather lol’d at me and said sure, tennis.

When I asked my parents if I could go they were happy to ferry me around, the school has a tennis court that we are allowed to use after hours if we have our own rackets and balls so mum dropped me with my two rackets in front of the school, I promised to call her to collect me from Charlotte's house later.

I was early so I did some warmup exercises on the court, stretching and shuttle runs. I’ve been told stretching doesn’t matter but I needed to pass the time anyway. I was just starting to build up a sweat when Charlotte arrived. She was wearing a pair of really short shorts and a stripy t-shirt and was limping a bit, she obviously wasn't anywhere near as comfortable on this new leg.

I gave her a hug when she came into the high fenced tennis court, “Hey, it looks so cool!” I say, mainly to make her comfortable. The blade is cool but it's also weird seeing her with the spring-like limb protruding out the back of her calf.

“I’m not sure I will use it as my daily driver.” She tells me, “The physio tells me it won't be as comfortable walking because it's a little too long. Apparently it needs to be longer so it feels okay when it compresses whenever I run but that makes it awkward to walk in, like wearing too big shoes.”

“Oh, well, that's okay. It still means you can do sports though.” I rationalise, trying to cheer her up. She doesn't seem quite as excited as yesterday, she's a little sluggish. “Hey, does that mean you aren't going to get a cute haircut?” I’m pretty sure I nailed the reason she’s on a downer.

“Yeah, probably not. Mum likes my hair long.”

“Aw, that's not fair! Want me to have words with her?” I joke, she doesn't reply. “Anyway, shall we hit some balls around?”

“Yeah, take it real easy at first, there's a lot of sideways movements and stuff that I'm not super used to yet.” She says, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

I jog back to the other side of the net and then hand her a racquet. I give her the good one because I'm nice like that. “Okay, are you ready?” I knock a ball gently over the net, trying to get it right beside her. She hits it back easily and I have to move to return it. We do an easy volley for a fairly long time, neither of us missing but we are also not hitting the ball hard.

“I think we can go a little faster, perhaps just cross court stuff just now.” she says eventually.

I start to aim the ball further away from her and she does the same for me, it's not high intensity but wow it's starting to tire me out. Just as I’m thinking that she stumbles and falls over, “I’m okay, I just caught an edge weird.” She tells me quickly.

We get back to the game and she starts to hit the ball harder so I reciprocate. She wins the rally and tells me she is ready to start a proper game.

“If you're sure.” I say, still intending on talking it a little easy on her.

She wins the serve, and then the first two points. By this time I am not going easy on her. I win the serve back with a magnificent shot to the back corner but then have to duck as her return from my serve almost takes my head off.

“I thought you hadn't played this before?” I ask her, panting for breath.

“No, I never said that. I just couldn't get the sharp changes of direction before.” She looks far less puffed than I am!

She serves again after I retrieve the ball, her shots are really powerful, I manage to spike the ball over the net though and she dives for the high ball. ‘CRACK’ the noise echoes through the court and Charlotte goes down in a sprawl of limbs.

I run to her, vaulting the net in the process. “Are you okay?” She gets to her knees and I can see tears in her eyes.

“It broke.” She gives a sob, “It's not meant to break.” I grab her in a hug and hold her.

“It’s okay, don't worry, I’ll help you home.” I rub circles on her back and she squeezes me tight.

“Mum’s going to kill me, it was so expensive.” I can feel the tears soaking into my shirt. “It was meant to last me years.”

“It's okay, really Charlotte. You weren't doing anything with it you weren’t meant to, it's a manufacturing flaw.” She sniffs, trying to get the tears to stop. I murmur platitudes as she clings to me.

“I’m sorry,” she says at last, breaking the hug and wiping her eyes, “It's just, this leg was such a big thing. Mum didn't want to get it until I was almost finished growing and…” She sniffs again, tears running down her cheeks. “I thought it was going to be so great but it's so different and I don't like walking in it and now i've broken it. Mum’s going to think I did it on purpose because I wasn't happy.”

I rub her arm and shake my head, “You mum will be fine, I’m coming with you and I will tell her what happened. There’s no way she can think you broke it on purpose.”

She sniffs and dries her eyes, then she shifts to sitting on her bum so that she can look at the broken leg. It is cracked diagonally across the middle, the layers seem to have separated and the front layer has bowed in and broken.

“The back is still intact, you might be able to walk on it if you put less weight on it.” I suggest. She is stroking it like a puppy, tears still leaking slowly from her eyes.

“I hope they can fix it.” She says, her face all scrunched up as if she’s about to sob again.

“I think they will probably replace it, Charlotte, I don't think that's repairable.” She nods and gives a huge sigh.

“Help me up?” She asks, offering me both the hands. I grip them firmly and bodily pull her up, she puts weight on the leg and it bends drastically. I help her over to the post that holds up the net.

“Wait here and I will go pick up the gear.” I tell her and I go to collect the racquets and balls which are scattered around the court. When I return she seems to have got the tears under control. “Are you ready to go?” I ask, the two rackets and the balls are in bags which I have slung over my shoulder. I offer her an arm.

“Yeah, let's go face the music.” she says sadly.

I notice that her hand which isn’t holding on to me is covered in blood, “Charlotte, you're bleeding!” I point to her hand.

“Oh, so I am.” she looks in wonder at her hand, “It's not too bad, just skinned.” then she looks at me, “Oh, shit, I got it all over your shirt.”

“It doesn’t matter, as long as you’re okay. How far is your house?” I ask as we hobble through the gate in the fence.

“About two blocks away.” she steers us in the opposite direction to Becky’s house so they probably live about four blocks from each other. Walking distance. I feel a little jealous.

I briefly wonder where Mae lives, she told me yesterday that she goes to my school so she’s probably close by. I haven't noticed her at school yet but then there are a huge number of people milling about.

It takes ages, helping Charlotte hop to her house. I did suggest I give her a piggyback but she wasn't keen, I think she wanted to delay talking to her mum.

When we finally arrive at the house I am dismayed to find I am actually a racist prick! Two small kids race out to greet us and I am surprised that Charlotte's brothers are black. I know from meeting her at the pool that her mum is white but these kids are blacker than the ace of spades. Way darker skin than I would expect even if her dad, or more likely stepdad, were dark skinned.

Obviously seeing my confusion Charlotte says, “Dad and his previous wife were originally from Sudan. She died when Abdo was born.” Oh! That makes sense! She laughs at the look on my face.

“Mum met him shortly after that so Abdo and Talia have lived here since they were little. It's been about three years now” The kids race off to get their mum.

“So, you're okay with him, I mean you call him your dad?” I ask, probably being insensitive but three years seems pretty short to me.

“Well, I never had a dad. He left just after I was born, apparently me being born with one leg was too difficult for him.” She said the last part with a fair amount of venom. I see her point, if it's hard for him to have a kid with one leg, how hard is it for the kid? “Nasif is really nice, he’s been really good for mum.”

“So you were born with one leg?” I ask, seeing this as my best chance to ask without seeming rude.

“Yeah, congenital limb defect.” I realise we have stopped outside the house, I think she is probably stalling.

“Shall we go in?” I suggest, giving her a quick squeeze with the arm I have around her waist, trying not to dwell on the fact I am basically hugging her. She nods and we resume our hobble into the house.

“Mum!” She calls, getting a response that her mum is in the kitchen.

We navigate the narrow hallway, the house is really neat and tastefully decorated with light colours and dark wood, there are some interesting african carved sculptures scattered about and some colourful paintings which I can see through the door to the living room.

Charlotte's mum is standing doing the dishes when we walk in. “Hi Mrs Patterson, Charlotte had a bit of a fall when we were playing tennis.” I say, seeing Charlotte's reluctance to tell her mum. “Her new leg broke.” I could see tension in the woman’s shoulders as she grabbed a towel to dry her hands. “I think it must be a manufacturing fault, she wasn't doing anything really strenuous with it.”

“Okay, are you hurt?” She asks, turning around at last. Charlotte holds up her hand, showing the gravel rash that had caused all the bleeding. “I’ll get your other leg and you can run it under a cold tap.” She said after taking a quick look. There is a tension in the interaction and I can't decide whether it is caused by Charlotte's nerves and fear bleeding off into my view of the conversation or whether her mum is being a bit cold.

I help Charlotte sit down at the kitchen table and her mum returns with her old leg and a first aid kit. After changing legs she gets up and washes her hand, “Make sure there aren’t any stones left in there, you don't want it getting infected.” her mum said as she examined the bow like appendage. “So you were just playing tennis?” she asks me.

“Yeah, we had just warmed up and had just started playing for points. Charlotte was getting really good on her new leg.” I explained, trying not to be too defensive.

“Hmm, we’ll call the prosthetics centre after we get you cleaned up Charlotte. See what they have to say.” Charlotte nodded at the sink and somehow I could tell she was crying again.

I went over to check on her and I could see the tears, “It's okay, I’m sure they will make you a new one.” I say, giving her another one armed hug whilst also looking at her palm.

“Oh, Kelly, you have blood all down your back!” Charlotte's mum exclaimed. “Let me get you a clean t-shirt.” she bustles off, presumably to Charlotte's room.

Charlotte turns to me and hugs me properly, “Thank you for being here.” She says, hugging me tight. “This would have sucked if it happened next week playing football with the boys! I would have been so embarrassed.”

Mrs Patterson returns with a fresh t-shirt for me and I peel the old one off, it's a bit wet from Charlotte's hands now too. Pulling on the clean white tee I breath in the scent of their washing powder, it smells nice. The shirt has a big red ‘Levis’ logo on the front and fits me quite well. I wonder briefly whether Charlotte’s eyes had lingered on my bare skin before telling myself to stop dreaming, the likelihood of my new friend being both gay and attracted to me are very slim.

Her mum sprays her hand with antiseptic and then once she has waved that dry applies some of that spray on bandage, by the looks of Charlotte dancing around and waving her hand it must have stung!

“Okay, I’m going to call the leg people, why don't you two go upstairs and play quietly?” Charlotte looks at me with an embarrassed smile and leads me to her bedroom. I’m glad to see it's almost as messy as mine. She quickly picks up some dirty laundry and throws it in a basket in the corner.

“Sorry about the mess.” She says, sitting down on the bed, I am again amazed at how natural she looks with her old leg, none of her movements seem awkward or favour her good leg.

“Hey, it's tidier than mine.” I assure her.

“I’m sorry I ruined the day.” She tells me, “And I’m really sorry I broke down and cried like that. You won't tell anyone will you?”

“I will take it to my grave!” I assure her, looking around at her room. She has a Rammstein poster on one wall and it confuses me. I had thought they were pretty fascist but this is a black girl in golden armour.

“Should I put some music on?” She asks, seeing my interest in the poster, “It has to be quiet because we are being good little girls and playing quietly.” She said in a sarcastic tone.

“Sure.” I agree and she fiddles with her stereo. After a few seconds the unmistakable sound of Howl coming from the speakers, holy hand grenades, she actually listened to them!

“So, did you like them?” I ask, a little concerned she may only be playing them for my benefit.

“They are a little… tame. A bit more Marlyn Manson than Rob Zombie. Not bad though.”

I nod, now I know more about what she’s looking for, “You might prefer Drowning Pool then. Hey, have you seen the Johnny Cash and Marlyn Manson mashup of God’s Gonna Cut You Down on YouTube?”

“No, hold on, I'll get out my laptop.” She gets down on her stomach and rummages under her bed. I have to wonder how it got so buried because she pulls out a heap of rubbish before she finds it.

“It's a bit slow but it can run youtube.” She powers the thing on and I realise it is one of the old chromebooks we had in primary school. She's right, it takes its sweet time booting up but once it's running the internet seems to go okay.

We find the mashup I was talking about and she does like it, not what she normally listens to but she agrees it's cool. I probably like it because it combines both eras of music that I listen to, a bit like the Disturbed cover of Sound of Silence.

We listen to a bit of Drowning Pool, she likes them but doesn't love them, I try her on Ministry, that seems to go down well but then the playlist automatically goes on to Revco singing I'm not gay.

My heart falls and I quickly move it to Slick Idiot, hoping she doesn't notice my reaction. For some reason I really didn't want her singing along to that song.

Before the song gets to the good bit Mrs Patterson sticks her head around the door, she glares a little at the music playing but she isn't here to complain about our taste, “Grab your stuff girls, we are going to have to take a drive to the prosthetics centre, I can take a detour and drop you off if you like Kelly, otherwise they say it shouldn't take long.”

“Okay Mum,” Charlotte hops to her feet and closes the Chromebook, flicking it under the bed with her toe.

“Would you mind if I came?” I ask Kelly, I’m quite interested to see what they say, I’m amped and ready to fight them if they suggest it broke due to misuse.

“No, you’re welcome to come but it might be a bit boring.” I insist that I don't mind and we all pile into the car. The little ones have to come too because their dad is out somewhere but Talia is happy because she gets to sit in the front so that myself and Charlotte can sit and talk. She moves her own booster seat and I jump into the middle seat. It is a little cramped with Abdo in his booster seat beside me, it is a rather small car, but as Charlotte sits on my other side, thigh pressed to mine I see that as a bonus.

Charlotte's mum has the same taste in music as my dad so it’s golden oldies all the way to town. Charlotte sits fiddling with the broken appendage all the way. She seems pretty nervous and doesn’t engage me in conversation much, no matter how hard I try. Abdo however is a little chatterbox, we have a great conversation about the aliens in Home, a movie I have not seen but by the end of the trip I doubt I need to, I know the full plot and all the characters.

We arrive at the centre and as we get out of the car in the car park Mrs Patterson quietly thanks me for putting up her son, I’m not sure why, he was very sweet.

We descend as a pack on the limb place, the fairly empty reception is suddenly full. It feels a bit odd, every single person in the room, including the receptionist, is missing at least one limb, one old man in a wheelchair appears to only have half of one hand, his legs are missing from the waist and his other arm ends slightly below the elbow.

He waves at me with his missing hand, obviously seeing the surprise on my face, “Never get diabetes!” He tells me. I nod and am about to talk to him when Abdo pulls me away, “Sorry!” I manage as I am whisked away. Abdo takes me to a kids area in the corner, they have obviously spent some time here already as he launches into an explanation of each toy, their names and how they work, piling me with fisher price. I can see his sister laughing at me from across the waiting room, the seven year old obviously enjoying not being Abdo's playmate for once.

I manage to get him to play with some wooden bricks, building towers is at least something I don't find too boring. It appears that Charlotte has been taken straight in as she and her mother are nowhere to be seen. I am starting to regret not being dropped home. The man from the front desk comes to my rescue after we knock down what must have been the fiftieth tower. He turns on a little TV in the corner and puts on a Disney DVD.

The man is missing his left hand and has an interesting mechanical replacement that he holds the remote control with, seeing my interest he lifts his hand and says, "Lost it in a card game!"

I smile and say, "I was more wondering how it works?" I ask him and he sits down with me and removes his hand.

"It has sensors here which pick up electrical impulses in the muscle, then it just drives the fingers; it has a few different modes to determine how the hand closes that I chose with this button. There are better ones now but this is about three times cheaper than any other model and I find it does what I need." He hands me the arm which surprises me, the inside is a kind of smooth rubber and I can see a shiny cluster of what must be the electrodes on the bottom side.

"Wow, it's heavier than I expected." I tell him, the arm looks a lot like a gauntlet or the arm from an iron man suit. "Do they make these here?" I ask him, handing the arm back.

"No, we just do the fitting. It's pretty cool though, it lets a lot more people get into myoelectric arms." He slips the arm back on, it's amazing how easily it is removed and put back on.

“Myoelectric?” It's a word I haven't heard before.

It's what they call the pickup that detects the nerve impulses.” He explains.

"It must be a really rewarding job." I say, I'm sort of wondering about future careers. It seems like the sort of thing that I would like.

"For the most part. It can be heartbreaking too at times. Children who have just had an amputation or people who still have bone cancer or diabetes and each time you see them they have more bits missing. It is rewarding though, giving people back some self reliance. It's very cool seeing the technology getting better every year too." He glanced over my shoulder. "Oh, that was a quick visit, I think your friend is ready to go."

Looking round I see Charlotte waving at me. "Come on Abdo, time to leave." He isn't keen having just gotten into the movie. "I'm sure you can watch it at home."

"No! We don't have this one!" He gripes.

"Well, I do so I can lend you it, we're stopping by my house on the way anyway." That made him happy, he's now jumping around as if I had fed him sugar! “Thank you for talking to me, and for showing me your arm.” I say to the man, I lead Abdo to his mum who again thanks me for looking after him.

"Perhaps you could help Charlotte babysit some evenings? I am sure she would love the company." I'm not sure I enjoyed the experience that much but then, it would allow me to hang out with my new friend more. I nod and smile noncommittally as we walk out the door, not wanting to promise anything but I keep the option open.

"Did everything go okay?" I ask assuming it did from their general demeanor.

"Yeah! Apparently they expect a few to fail so they aren't charging us to replace it. We do need to reschedule the football game though, it's going to take at least a week to manufacture a new one." Charlotte explains.

That makes me a little sad, I had been looking forward to next weekend. "Perhaps we can go swimming on Saturday or Sunday instead?" She suggests.

"Damn, I can't, I'm staying at Becky's Saturday and I have squads on Sunday. Otherwise I would have loved to. Perhaps if we invite Becky?" I don't actually want to invite Becky, I want some nice alone time but if it's that or nothing, I will take what I can get.

"Yeah, that's fine, we can go in the morning, there are always less people in then." There was a pause as she thought, "The slides open at ten though so we shouldn't go too early, perhaps nine thirty? We can race first."

The car ride is uneventful, Abdo is a lot quieter on the way back, I assume he's just tired.

They drop me off and I race upstairs, that Disney movie is on a shelf in the home cinema room upstairs so I have to pull the ladder down using the long pole. I'm trying to do this quickly but the more I hurry the more I mess things up, I miss the second rung and smash my shin into the ladder, that's going to bruise.

Finally upstairs I rake through the massive pile of kids films, pulling out all the little kids ones until I find the one I had promised to lend him. I open the box and it has the wrong film! Argh! I start opening every box I had pulled out, and eventually I find it.

Looking at the mess I made I think maybe I should just lend them all the films. There's a carrier bag in the cupboard so I just stack them all in and make my way back down.

"Is that you home Kelly?" Mum calls from the kitchen.

"Yeah, I'm just lending some kids films to Charlotte's little brother." I reply, limping out on my banged leg.

"Okay, we can talk when you're back." Oh shit, what are we talking about now?

I pass the bag through the window to Charlotte's sister who instantly starts raking, the films are still probably her age group too I suppose.

"Thanks for this Kelly, you may have trouble getting them back from him though." Charlotte's mum tells me as I lean in through the window.

"I doubt any of them have been watched in a couple of years. I doubt we will miss them before he gets bored of them." I suspect dad would prefer we didn't get them back, more space for his golden oldies collection. I pull my head back and wave as they drive off.

Oh god, now I need to face mum, it had better not be one of those talks, it sounded like her serious voice. Oh shit, perhaps she heard about my detentions! Nah. Surely not.

I walk into the kitchen where mum is baking something, "Hey mum, sup?"

"Hi Kelly, have a seat. You can have a drink and one of the biscuits I just took out of the oven."

I give her a wary drawn out, "Ooookkkaaayyy." I sit anyway, I'm not turning down fresh bikkies.

She puts cold milk and a plate with a large biscuit in front of me, obviously buttering me up, "I talked to Abbies mum." Oh shit! My heart is hammering, what about? Hold on, Abbies mum?

"Eh?" Eloquent Kelly, "I mean pardon? Erm, what about?"

"Anne said you wanted to go to Jenny's party, obviously you can't go if you are staying at Rebecca's house." Yeah, erm, what? I don't remember being invited. The confusion must have shown on my face because mum explains, "I didn't want to get your hopes up before I asked, but as long as you are willing to either sleep on the floor or cram in with Abby and Anne in the double bed then you can stay there, that way you can go."

"Erm, why?" I ask, I'm pretty bamboozled.

"Well, the Rosenberg's turned their spare room into an office so they don't have a spare bed." She explains to me, getting the wrong end of the stick.

"Oh, no I understand that, sorry. I meant why would Jenny invite me? Not that I don't want to go, I do!" I really try to make that clear, mum seems to be smiling at me. "What?"

"She obviously enjoyed your company Kelly, it is nice that you and your sister are getting on so well recently."

"Yeah… we found some common ground I guess?" Yeah, who would have thought my sister finding out I'm a lesbian would make her want to spend time with me? “Oh! I arranged to go swimming with Becky and Charlotte on Saturday morning, do you think I could still do that?” Suddenly my social life got a whole lot busier!

“Well, your dad and I won't be going out until dinner time so I am sure one of us can run you to Becky's and back.” I can hear her laugh at me as I fist pump and run to the phone to tell Becky.