《Humble Rumble》chapter 2
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Chapter 2
It had been one week and Rumble had thirty wrestling matches against various jobbers, whose jobs are to make the stars look good. Such wrestlers are paid to be cannon fodder for the better-known wrestlers. He had fought five cage matches in that time, as well. It was the day of the young lion tag tournament.
An old man that looks that has gotten much mileage on the journey called life is standing inside an
eighteen by the eighteen-foot sized ring. This ring was called by the wrestlers, as a workers' ring. This kind of ring was made to more gentle that the twenty by twenty wrestling rings used by super heavyweight wrestlers. Both of the sports organizations that had hired Rumble were known by their smaller, faster technician wrestlers. They had heavyweights and supers, as well, to help draw the fans to the arenas.
The smaller wrestlers kept the fans inside their seats and made sure that they returned.
The aged man in a nice three-piece suit finally speaks, "I have competed for over thirty years and I am a twenty-time world champion!"
The people all chanted, "Yeah!"
The man yelled back “Yeah!”
This went on for several minutes.
“It is time for the moment at hand, and I have found eight teams consisting of the best tag wrestlers that had yet proven themselves as wrestlers. The first team is the furries!”
Two male wrestlers come out in fursuits, with one dressed as a fox with cartoon features. The other man was dressed, as some sort of lizard.
They enter the ring as they are introduced, "The fox wrestler is called Furry!"
The wrestler puts his paws up into the air, as trash is thrown at him.
“The lizard wrestler is called Scaly!”
The Ring was covered in trash, as the fans screamed out, "Die Fur fags, die!"
The old man didn’t move an itch, as the noncompeting young lions, try to clean up the dirtied
ring.
“The second tag team is the moonshiners!”
The whole crowd stood to them, as two fat rednecks come out with moonshine jugs in their
hands. They are barefoot while wearing dirty overalls, with straw hats.
“The taller man is called Cleetus and the smaller man is Rufus!
The fat men climbed over the top rope, as they raised their smelly armpits up into the air.
The old man spoke, "The third team is called Pretty Boys R' Us They are Connor and Duncan!"
Every woman in the crowd begun to scream out in glee, while their lovers boo.
The two men had long hair while no shirts on and leather pants. The pretty boys have a shirt collar around their neck with a bow tie.
“The fourth team is a team consisting of two robot brothers, Nuts and bolts, the Robo madness.”
Every kid in the building yelled out with joy, as the team enters the ring.
“The fifth team is the hunters for hire, run, and Gun!"
The two men were dressed, like big game hunters.
“The sixth team is consisting of Silver and Gold, the precious metals”.
The two men were covered in over twenty pounds of precious metals.
“The seventh team is Rude and Crude, the Slut shamers!”
The two men were dressed as preachers with bibles in their hands, and ponchos in the other. The two were preaching about immortality, while they cover every half-naked woman that was near them. Boos could be heard by the majority of the fans.
“The last team is consisting of two young prodigies! Humble Rumble and Red Flair.”
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The crowd lost it when they saw the ill-made duo came out to the ring. Red flair was in a red and black colored outfit. The red was in the form of various flames over his body. He had a flame over
each of his mask’s eye holes.
“I will now reveal the matches! The first match will be Humble Rumble and Red Flare vs the furries!”
The fans yelled, “Beat their ass! Rumble! Flare! Beat their ass!”
Rumble wanted to hit the mat and kick his feet, as ill-behaved children
“The second match is The moonshiners vs Pretty Boys R’ Us.”
The crowd cheered.
“The third match will be Robo Madness vs Hunters for Hire! The last match will be the Precious Metals vs the Slut Shamers.”
Everybody but the teams for the first match left the ring. A ref entered the ring and the bell was rung.
Furry stayed in the ring, while Scaly exits the ring, and stood on the corner of the ring. Red Flare
wanted to start the match, but Humble wouldn’t let him by putting an arm in front of his tag partner.
Flare finally relented as Humble started the match.
The two masked wrestlers started to circle each other in an attempt to get a feel for each other.
Rumble had the first move and did a dropkick to Furry. The furry dodged the move and clothesline the neck of Humble.
The black and yellow wrestler rotating his body mid-air and transitioned into an armbar. Furry had used all his might to keep Rumble from breaking his arm, by grabbing his entrapped arm with his
free hand.
Rumble spoke quietly to only Furry could hear.
"I hate furries because you're all sick in the head."
Furry spoke, "Don't kink-shame me!"
Rumble spoke, "Kink shaming is my kink!"
Furry screamed out in horror, as Rumble had gotten hold of his opponent’s arm. Furry was about to tap when Scaly jumped into the ring and broke Humble's hold of his tag partner. Ref pounced at Scaly and forced him out of the ring.
Rumble used the confusion to rip the mask off of Furry and threw it into the crowd away from
the inattentive ref.
Humble then went into a quick pin, while covering up the face of Furry. Because taking off a wrestler's mask was an instant disqualification.
Red flare spoke,”Get back over here ref!”
The official turned around to see that Rumble was pinning Furry with his shoulders to the mat.
The ref counted one, two, and..”
Furry kicked out and rolled out unto his belly. He was doing all he could to cover his face.
The ref yelled, "Rumble, did you take his mask?"
Humble spoke, "He took off because he was too hot, due to him wanting to yiff!"
Scaly got into the ring while gesturing with his hand, that Rumble had taken off Furry's mask.
Rumble spoke, "Even if I did it, you have to see it to disqualified me!"
The fans throw the mask back into the ring, as Furry puts back on his mask.
The fans chanted, "He didn't do it!"
The match would continue on.
The two wrestlers locked up, but Rumble overpowered him. The furry was forced unto his back but still managed to keep his shoulders off the mat. He used his head to bridge his upper body off the ground.
Rumble did a double knee stomp to the belly of Furry, who rolled over to his corner. Scaly was tagged into the match, as Humble tagged Red flare.
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The two wrestlers stared into the ground, as the fans chanted, "Take his mask!"
Red Flare put his hand to his ear, as the fans chanted, "Beat this Fur fag!"
Rumble tried to get back into the ring, as the ref was trying to stop him with his back to the other wrestlers.
Red flare kicked Scaly straight in his balls, as he stole his mask. He put on the lizard mask on over his own mask. He started to soccer kicked the furry in his side, as hard as he could.
Flare put Scaly into a camel clutch, which covered the face of his foe.
Scaly was tapping out, as hard as he could.
Rumble had grabbed the ref, to allow his partner to get free hits on his foe. Red flare puts the mask back unto his foe's head.
The ref was let go by Humble and he saw the injured Scaly on his belly.
Furry tried to enter the ring, but Rumble had done a dropkick from his corner, over to the opponent's corner. Furry was kicked unto the guard rail, as rumble land foot first in the first row. Furry was put into an armbar while using the guard rail to pin his arm.
Red Flare put scaly into a piledriver position on top of one of the turnbuckle.
The fans were screaming out in horror, as such a sight.
Red flare did a sitting piledriver to Scaly and knocked him out cold.
Flare made the pin, as the ref counted one, two, three!”
Rumble and his tag partner had won the first match.
Red Flare left the ring, as Rumble left go of Furry.
The two walked into the back without even letting the ref lift their hands.
In the back was an announcer with a mike, as spoke, "Red Flare, Humble Rumble, do you have any words to say?"
The pair went off without saying a word.
The announcer spoke, "These guys are men of many words. It would be interesting to see what
this pair doing in their next match.”
Finally, The Furries came back into the back.
The same announcer spoke, "Furries, it is sad that you two had been beaten in the first round.'
Scaly took the mike and spoke, "This is a miscarriage of justice since these punks took both of masks! They should've been disqualified instantly, but the ref was incompetent!"
Furry took the mike and spoke, "This isn't over yet! There will be hell to pay.
It was time for the second match of the young lions' tag tournament and the first team came out wearing just straw hats and stained overalls. They both had a jug of moonshine in their hands that was being used to wet their long unkempt beards. A lot of the crowd yelled out with glee as the Moonshiners entered the ring.
The next team caused nearly every woman to stand up awaiting for Pretty Boys R' Us to come out. The tag team was wearing no shirts and only a neck collar with a bow tie. Their smooth chests were exposed to all that may look upon them. Their pants were held up by only suspenders with heart designs upon them. They were wearing wrestling boots under their skin-tight leather pants.
The men in the crowd were showing thumbs down while displaying their disapproval of their partners lusting after another man.
The two teams sized each other out and the battle was now on. All four men were now battling each other. The ref called for the bell to be rung and the match was now official.
The ref put both of his index fingers together as he cried out," one on one!"
Cleetus and the blond hair Connor remained in the ring and the others went to their respective
corners.
The crowd was shouted out rival chants,” Moonshiners! Pretty Boys!”
It was deafened to everybody inside the arena and into most of the backrooms.
The two wrestlers start to circle each other before they lock up into a test of strength.
Cleetus forced Connor down unto his eyes in front of him, while pressing down on his foe just with his arm strength.
The women were screaming for Connor to strike back before he is pressed unto the mat.
The redneck yelled out, "Come on, girly man! You can do better than that!"
Connor took him on his offer and forced himself back unto his feet. The man tripped Cleetus and caused him to fall chest first unto the second rope.
Connor rose to his feet and jumped through the second rope, next to his foe. He performed a Tiger feint kick by grabbing the top rope and rotated his body to kick Cleetus in the head.
The fat man fell back first on the mat while grabbing his head. Connor immediately took advantage of his fallen foe.
Cleetus was soccer kicked in the head several times, before he rolled over to his belly. The pretty boy put his foe into a camel clutch. The move had the attacker pull the victim’s head and back rearward with their arms.
The men were yelling for the moonshiner to fight back, while the women cried out with glee.
Rufus was sticking his hand to tell his tag partner to tag out. Cleetus couldn’t get out of the hold for over one minute.
Rufus yelled out, "Get that girly boy off of you and get your fat ass over here!"
The men were chanting, "Come on, Cleetus!"
The moonshiner broke out of the hold, rush to his partner, and tagged Rufus in.
Rufus charged at Connor who jumped towards his corner and tagged out.
Duncan was taller than Connor and had dark black hair. Rufus was ready to go and chased his foe to the nearest corner while performing a flying dropkick. The crowd was in awe over the five
hundred pound man being so agile. The move was so fierce that it broke the top turnbuckle, which caused the top rope to become loose.
The match was paused, while the ring was fixed. The fans were at a fever pitch when the match continued.
Rufus started to cartwheel towards his opponent and caught Duncan into a stunner, which knocked him unto his back. The foe tagged him, partner, back in, as he rolled out of the ring and unto the concrete ground. (A stunner has the attacker grab his foe's neck downwards while having his back to their opponent).
Cleetus called out to his partner to tag him in, which Rufus did just that.
It was Connor versus Cleetus again and the six hundred pounders were chomping at the bit.
The pretty boy rolled out of the ring to safety, which pissed off the moonshiner. Connor thought he was safe, as he had his back to his foe. But, that safety wasn’t wouldn’t last for long.
Because the fat man did a flying crossbody to the two men on the outside of the ring. It was an astounding success, as Rufus added unto the strike with a flying belly flop to the two prone men.
The Rufus was counting since the two teams were outside the ring. The moonshiners threw Connor into the ring with Cleetus rushed to pin his foe. Rufus was pressing Duncan against the side of the ring while using all of his body weight. The pretty boy was powerless to get himself free of the moonshiner.
Cleetus had his foe up into the air vertically in a jackhammer power slam and forced him down to the mat. The moonshiner landed his fat torso down unto Duncan.
The women were screaming out in horror, as the ref counted, "one, two, three!"
Young girls were crying that their team had just lost. The moonshiners’ music came on and the two men walked to the back.
They were asked for an interview and the two men agreed.
Rufus spoke, "Those punks were not ready for what we were going to give them. Those skinny boys, better are ready for us!"
Cleetus spoke, "What the hell is a Humble Rumble? Red Flare is a youngin' from the famous Flare family, but he will do no better!"
The two Moonshiners walked back to the locker room.
#
Pretty Boys R’ Us were being helped to the back by a few young boys (newbie wrestlers).
The interviewer was knocked out of the way as the losers were in no mood to talk.
The next match was up and it was the team Robo Madness who came out first as they had just come off some mech show. All the kids in the arena had the two men’s robot’s images on their clothes, along with a lot of the boys holding their action figures in their little hands. The team consisted of two red and blue colored robots named Nuts and Bolts. The red wrestler was called Nuts, while the blue robot was named Bolts.
The next team was called the hunters for hire, which had all the hunters/outdoorsmen in the crowd jumping for joy. The two men were dressed as wild game hunters dressed in camouflage, as if they had just came from hunting, The men were identical twins that only difference in appearance was their facial hair. The first man named Run had a large handlebar mustache that was close to two feet in width. He had the rest of his face shaven beside his goatee. Gun, on the other hand, had a long bushman style beard that extended down to his muscled chest.
The two teams didn’t fight before the bell started and even shook hands to show that they were keeping the code of honor. (This meant that the match would be a clean one, with no cheating).
The bell rung and Nuts and Run were starting the match give each a bow, as a sign of mutual respect. The crowd clapped in approval of the sportsmanship displayed.
The robot started to throwing spinning fists at the hunter, but it was for naught.
Run dodged and gave his machine for a chop to the chest, which caused sparks to pour off of
Nuts’ torso.
The hunter shouted, "What the hell? Is he off of the ultimate sentai show?"
Nuts used the confusion to strike his fleshy foe with a spinning fist. Run was knocked back into the ropes.
Gun shouted, "Brother, get that waste of metal and turn him into scrap metal!"
Run did just that and used the second rope to use to propel him into a flying superman punch.
Sparks blew off of Nuts’ torso and caused him to roll out of the ring.
The kids started to scream out, "Get up Nuts! Beat him up!”
The robot got back in the ring and started to do some sort of pose. Run was walking on the top the closest to his foe.
The hunter did a flying double ax handle to the head of Nuts. Sparks flew off the robot, but he remained steadfast in his pose. (the move has the attacker land on its foe with both fists wrapped together).
Run was grabbed up into a throwing belly to belly suplex, which causes him to fly over the top rope and land on the metal guardrail in front of the onlooking crowd.
Nuts had been caught mid-pose when he was given a Hurricanrana and thrown out of the ring.
Gun had taken advantage of his flashy foe, which caused bolts to attack him as a means of revenge.
(This move causes the victim to be flipped in almost a complete three hundred degrees arc with the attackers' legs and core muscles).
The ref had no time to break the two illegal men, as he was counting towards a ring out the victory.
“17, 18, 19.”
Both men rolled into the ring in time.
Both teams returned to their respective corners and tagged their partners in. It was now Bolts vs Gun, which the fans were starting to get excited.
The two warriors started to give each other harsh chomps to the chest. The blows were getting harder and harder. Sparks were endlessly coming off of Bolt's chest, while Gun's chest has to bleed from the blows.
The blue robot did a double spinning punch to his opponent after he jumped off the second rope.
Gun was knocked out of the ring and slammed against the guard rail.
The hunter climbed back into the ring and tagged Run back in. Nuts were tagged back into the match.
The two warriors started to circle each waiting for the moment to strike.
This went on for over one minute, before the two fighters each a flying dropkick to each other.
Both kicks landed and they land hard on their sides.
The ref checked on the competitors and asked, "Can you continue?"
Both fighters screamed out, "Yes!'
The two stand up to their feet and continued to wrestle.
They did a double punch to the face.
Both men were knocked out.
The ref called for stretchers and had them carried off into the back for medical care.
It was now Nuts vs run.
The fans were chanting, "This is awesome!"
The robotic wrestlers started to spin into a circle and started to move around, like a spinning top.
Run was pinned in the nearest turnbuckle to the point where he couldn’t defend himself
anymore.
The ref gestured for the bell to be rung.
Nuts spot the assault after hearing the bell.
Medical staff carried off Run, as the robotic warrior stood victorious.
The kids were happy as the robot did poses for them.
No interview was given by ether team.
Rumble and Flare were whispering with each other, as the match ended.
Now was the last match was now Precious metals vs the Slut Shammers. The two were now in the ring, waiting for the bell to ring. There would be no code of honor in this match.
The teams gave each other curses and the brawl was on. Everybody exited the ring and started to fight, like wild men. Silver had a TV cable wrapped around Rude’s neck in the attempt to strangle him old cold. Prude was beating Gold with the time keeper’s hammer in the side of the head.
The ref couldn't count out or disqualify both teams since it was a tournament. There had to be a winner. Gold was bashing the ring bell into the jaw of Rude, while Prude was getting his head bashed at his back.
Precious metals were taken their foes into the ringside seats, as fans rushed to get out of the way.
Rude threw a half-filled bear cup unto the face of Gold. The man didn't take kindly to that and started to pummel his foe in the head with flying metal chairs.
God spoke, "You nasty bastard! Take this on for size!"
Rude started to run towards the concession stands,
Prude and Silver were taking turns bashing each other in the top of their heads, as hard as possible. Normally at the promotion, the move would be an instant disqualification, but that would not happen here today. Both men would be fined ten thousand dollars, by the promotion. Yet, they could care less, since it was ass-kicking time.
The Ref had gotten some popcorn and a soda while sitting in one of the ring's corners.
The announcer was shouting on the mike, "Please stop! Get back to the ring!"
None of the wrestlers listened to the request and continued on to beat each other up.
Silver and Gold were setting up tables and stacking them on top of each other until there were two rows of three tables on top of each other. The fans were both excited and concern over what would happen next.
The precious metals dragged the slut Shammers unto the second floor. The crowd was screaming out in horror about what was going to happen next.
Gold and Silver were about to powerbomb their opponents when the move was blocked by the enemy team. The Slut Shammers were making themselves into dead weights by wrapping their shins around the legs of their would-be attackers.
Prude and Rude got free of the precious metals and whipped them unto the floor below. It was a twenty feet drop through thick metal and wooden chairs. Women and children were screaming at the sight, while the men were chanting, “Holy shit! Holy shit!”
The ref stopped the match, as the Slut Shammers put their hands up in victory.
Medical staff was carting off the precious metals into a nearby ambulance.
The backroom interviewer was dripping in sweat, as he had rushed to interview the winning team.
“Slut Shammers, how does it feel to the win the last match of the first round of the...”
Prude spoke, "Get your filthy self away from me you dirty rotten sinner! I will beat you as they did on the day those demons put the good Lord on the cross!"
Rude chimed in with an “amen.”
The pair went on preaching for several minutes before the microphone was turned off. The two then walked back to the locker room.
#
The show went into an intermission, as the staff put back the arena back into working order.
Humble and Red Flare were excited in the back after seeing the brawl.
Rumble spoke, "I wished that we could've taken part in that blood bath!
Before Flare could respond, a young boy shouted, "Guys, it is time for your match!"
The motley crew entered the ring and were waiting for the moonshiners to come out. When the fatsos got within fifteen feet of the ring the smaller team did a double flying cross body to the opposing team. (This move has the attacker throw themselves the chest of their foe while turning their body horizontally).
But was for naught, since the moonshiners caught the smaller tag team. (Humble Rumble and Red flare’s combined weight was only four hundred and eighty pounds, compared to eleven hundred plus Moonshiners). The entrapped team was bucklebombed unto the edge of the ring. (the edge of the ring had little protection on it and was mostly consisted of metal.
Rumble and Flare were grabbing their backs due to pain, as they were yelling out their frustration. Rumble was cursing so much that it would make a sailor blush.
The team had no time to recover as they were picked up by their fat foes and flung one-handed into the farthest guard rail. They both landed upside down and were defenseless.
The moonshiners ran to the opposite side of the guard rails and raced towards the heroes.
The two fatties performed a flying belly flop on Rumble and Flair. Both of the victims lost all their breath and couldn’t recover themselves back to their normal selves.
The moonshiners were ripping off the floor mats used to protect the wrestlers from landing on the concrete floor. The whole area was now bare floor, as the huge rednecks walked over to the duo.
Women could be heard screaming at the sight of Rumble and Flair incoming assault.
The fat men used up the slender wrestlers and flipped upside down.
The moonshiners were going to piledriven them into the hard floor.
Rumble and Flair were each given a gotch piledriver unto concrete! (This variation has the attacker’s arm locked around the victim's body, as they are slammed head first into the ground. The attacker sits on the floor at the end of the move).
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