《Tales from Drestburg》Part 10: Interim
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One week later...
" Hey Alek?"
" Yup Misha." Alek put down his book for once after a five-hour long reading marathon.
" Check out Anya." The sixteen year old tilted his head towards the snoring teenager to his immediate left. Her snoring was so intense, that the sounds were akin to a machinegun firing for ten seconds straight.
" I believe I can provide us with a solution to the problem."
" Oh really! What do need?" A lieutenant replied who was just next to her left as well. He only had a minor problem. He's currently awaiting surgery after his fingers were blown off.
" All we need is a Ricker and Meyn." Misha replied to his superior whilst lying on the bed. His and his squadmates backs were a mess that even after a week, they were still lying on their beds.
" What? All you need is a Sock?" The Lieutenant replied confused, his sock's brand is Ricker and Meyn.
The two went up smiling, the lieutenant was clearly not a Berglander. In Bergland, the meaning of Rick and Meyn was a gentalia.
" No sir, all we need is a cock-a-doodle-doo!" Ryan replied in a playful manner, making half of the people in the room burst in laughter.
" You better be kidding me!"
" No sir! We kid you not." He replied in a near mechanical manner making even the captain who was sitting on her bed laugh at the idea.
Anya who was disturbed in her sleep, woke up after that thunderous volley of laughs and asked: " Whats' with the putting cocks on my mouth. I cant's find any cocks out here?"
" OOH, that hurts." a female captain cried, whilst keeping a collected face.
" Okay, what the heck where guys taking about? Misha's two kilogram cock?"
The entire room just burst into a :
" HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!" Except for Mikhail of course, he knew what she meant. He had a fat rooster back home as a pet.
However, the hilarity didn't stop there. The jokes went on ranging from dark humor to Political jokes. The entire room was a literal laughing stock. If anybody needs a reason to laugh, they could just go right in and get some stock. It was such a success that at one point, a general even joined in the fun (So much for anti-familiarity measures in the military). However, of those outsiders who decided to vent off some steam, they managed to acquire some nightmares. I mean really, because for the most part the lads were preoccupied with black jokes. At one point they were making fun of someone's eyeballs after they were "evicted" out of the guy's "Bulbous head". No matter what kind of jokes they were making, the doctors were also concerned since the people inside were already laughing maniacally. Some were even laughing with their faces kissing the very floor they just stepped. Others were rolling on the beds, prompting the doctors to even pull their nurses out after they got affected with the laughing madness! To their relief, the jokes toned down but were only getting violent. Making fun of the disappearance of an entire squad after finding traces of pre-cum is the misfit commander's joy ride after all.
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***
" Do you really think that this is the best time to give them a visit?"
" Pierre! Pierre! Pierre! This is the perfect moment!!!" She exclaimed sarcastically though she made an abrupt pause at the end.
" Okay! Okay! Actually I don't have any other chance than today. I'm still busy even now; I can't miss this moment." She continued before sighing.
" Seriously Monika! What's with you and that bookworm?"
" None of your business Pierre, None of your business."
" Then why am I here? I'm supposed to be recovering. Just look at my arm, It looks like a botched escargot!"
" Just lead the way, I know your C.O. is in that same room."
" Wait? Am I the orbiter here?" However just as they were closing into the room, the whole place was in a foul mood. One foreigner wearing a lamellar helmet even spat on the floor as he was trying to get out of earshot. Almost everybody was very gloomy, sans those who were stumbling while laughing their asses off as they got out of the very room they were trying to reach.
" What the heck is an orbi...." Just as she was about to enter after opening the door, she stopped. They stopped. The room was a mess, the General that once got in was playing a kids game like a boss!!! No seriously he was failing hard, the rotating wheel constantly picks the dumbest dares that as of now he was only wearing his underwear. Poor chap, if only he was laughing hysterically like the entirety of the people in the room.
" Hey Corporal! What the hell happened before that time when the ceiling collapsed on you?" The near drunken general asked raising a silver spoon on his right arm.
" Oh that sir? A stray wire hanged an undead bastard that rode that rocket. It was feisty one, and a pretty one as well."
" What the heck Francis! You mean our laundry hangers scored a kill?" Alek asked impatiently nearly crushing Mikhael's arm as he tried to stand.
" Yeah, though I have to thank Petrov for skinning the bugger alive. He was so skilled with his E-tool that he managed to strip the bastard to the skin with it. There were no such thing as cuts and bruises on the thing as it was dangling as it hanged." Francis said whilst snickering in his breath.
The trio meanwhile, laughed maniacally as they remembered the very wire that they were hanging their undies a month ago while imagining how a length of wire could hang an undead creature as it streamed inside riding a rocket.
" Wait a minute!" The female captain asked loudly, shutting everyone up in attention
" What does it look like?" She continued while keeping playful smile as she stood.
" A young you."
" Is it white?"
" Yeah?"
" Is it fresh?"
" Yup"
" Did it look like you wan't to jam your little nut?"
" What!" Francis exclaimed before she immediately jumped on his bed, and started moved his hips back and forth in a sexual manner. Yikes!!!
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Meanwhile, the two outside were starting to feel their faces curl in disgust. Though Pierre was tempted by a bit to join the ruckuss. It soon came to the point where the Captain struck Francis' manhood and stroked as if doing a handjob while doing the twerk as the rest were cheering like there's no tomorrow. Seeing no way to continue watching further, they made quick 180 and and decided to call it a day. However for Pierre, his face started to frown; ever so darker. His memories back at that harsh mountain flashed back as if he was struck by lightning, ever so slightly he detached himself from reality.
" Hey! Hey! Hey!!! You okay???"
He was brought back only to see that he was staring at concrete wall. Monika was still shaking his head by pulling and pushing his shoulders.
" What's the matter??? You were out for like a minute!"
" Huh!!! Oh! That!"
***
" FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!FUCK!!!!" Pierre stood helplessly as his commanding officer cursed ever so passionately by the minute. The other platoon's position was bombarded with such efficiency that it looked like the ground was angry. He could swear that he saw an intact head fly up the sky and fall down in such a graceless manner.
" Tell everyone to ready their weapons and have the Artillery strike at the three suspected areas! Pierre!" Lieutenant Jean screamed making him jump a bit at the aggression shown by this usually calm commander.
" I'm giving you command of the sixth and fifth squads, your mission is to link up with the 2nd Platoon. Our platoon will guard this series of bunkers. Your mission is to coordinate an evacuation with their second in command. I don't know if the sonuvabitch is retarded but he's supposed to pull back now. Go there! Assess the situation and have them occupy their series of bunkers, its collecting dust now."
" Should I go now sir?"
" Are you a caveman! Go and organize your command first and wait till the bombarment stops, then you go! GO NOW!!!" Pierre was trembling at his words, that he immediately ran out of the bunker and sought the squad leaders. Just as he finished organizing the effort, the bombarment stopped just a second later. They spared no time and immediately ran towards the bewildered position of the 2nd platoon. Unlike the first platoon who survived with only one casuality that was just wounded, the 2nd was a mess. First Lieutenant Manzikert Madras didn't dig foxholes or trenches, he brought camouflage nets. Though the uneven terrain could be used as cover, there wasn't enough for the sorry faced troops. Equipment, armor, traces of splinters and corpses littered the place. The soldiers weren't wailing in their holes and improvised spider holes but deep in their eyes the emotions of despair were to be seen. The first thing he did was search for the second lieutenant or Madras himself, but the soldiers only lowered their heads when he asked them about him. One of them, a sergeant pointed at a puddle of blood and flesh. It was the lieutenant, just how he managed to be turned into a red goo is a real head ache. The second lieutenant wasn't any better. He had a concussion and was thrown into the air for a near five seconds before landing about seven to eight meters from his position. His arms were broken and the medic was barely calm at the situation as he had to tend nearly the entire platoon. His first move was to take charge of the five minutes of respite while their artillery was pounding the suspected areas.
He called for the squad leaders of the platoon as he was the highest rank amongst the battered NCO's. He thought that they might be a challenge to persuade, they were the lowest quality troops that this land could offer. They're the misfit regiment after all, the most ill disciplined that they were almost always light regiments without any chance to obtain some mobile armor. Their commanders acted like the vassals of a king with nearly each commisioned officer using a different command style to some effect. But just as he explained to them his superior officer's intent to retreat into a more defensible position, they immediately agreed on the spot; possibly they were used to Madras' near tyrannical conduct. Just after he dismissed them, they immediately gathered their troops and organized the situation. They carried ammunition, equipment, the wounded, and other important things like dog-tags of the dead and other important valuable. They were so quick that he was even surprised, he thought that these weary and shaken men would be cumbersome to deal with but they were not. It took them an entire six minutes to reach the hidden bunkers.
When he reached the place while carrying a wounded soldier, he met the lieutenant and stopped to give a crude salute. Jean smiled back gave him a salute as well, his deamenor showed that he was impressed and was proud. Just after they ended the formalities the machinegun on their own bunkers errupted in anger. And just as they turned their heads an explosion knocked them off their feet.
He was out for what seemed was a minute before awakening to the sounds of gun fire and explosions. He was shocked as his legs complained while he tried to stand, he looked down and found that they were bloody red! There were atleast five objects stuck in his legs and thighs that when the pain struck he was felt like hell!!! Luckily for him, another soldier caught him before he fell and tumbled in pain. He looked at his commander and saw him sluped with bloody arms and iron rock stuck to his bleeding head. The last thing he saw of him was that a medic that he brought from the sixth dragged him to safety. As for that soldier that he carried before, he was screaming in a corner with a splint stuck on his head.
Pierre took one good look at the city before another explosion threw him away!
" Hey! Hey! Hey!!! You okay???"
He was brought back only to see that he was staring at concrete wall. Monika was still shaking his head by pulling and pushing his shoulders.
" What's the matter??? You were out for like a minute!"
" Huh!!! Oh That!!!"
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