《Jeremy's Guide on How to Survive a Zombie Apocalypse》Rule #4: Control your Curiosity
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Rule #4: Control your curiosity
Well, that was crazy right? And all of that happened in just a few hours! I know taking down a zombie with a can opener doesn’t seem real, but trust me. It actually happened. I still have the can opener to prove it.
Anyway, zombies are very mysterious creatures. And ever since the Infection Days, we don’t really know much about them. So research as much as you can. But whatever you do, don’t get too curious. If you do, you will probably regret it. In my case, I almost ate the corpse I took down. But I didn’t. And you wanna know how? Let’s go back.
So, I was apparently out for a while. I only know that because I was woken up by an uncomfortable sensation. I groaned and opened my eyes to a bright light shining in my face.
“Ow!” A sharp pain suddenly manifesting from the sudden illumination. I squeezed my eyes shut to try to get rid of the strain. “What the hell?”
“Rise and shine, Beauty rest’s over.” After rubbing my eyes and blinking a couple times, I looked up and saw Ashton’s smug face in front of me, holding a flashlight. Oh great, now he shows up. Why aren’t there any alarm clocks around here?
“What took you so long? Did you get wasted or something?” I groaned, In response, Ashton scoffs as if I’d just asked the stupidest question ever.
“For your information, drinking on the job isn’t very productive. I’m more of a vodka connoisseur myself.” I rolled my eyes and sat up. A dull pain pulsed in my head. Guess my head hit the floor pretty hard when I collapsed.
“I thought you died or something.”
“Ha, Ha. ” He laughs and runs his hand through his hair. “I’m way too stubborn to do that. Sorry for disappointing you.” His eyes then scan around the room until he stares at the decomposed corpse I was on top of. “So...care to explain this?” My cheeks started to burn. Oh no, I’d forgotten about the explaining part. Now I have to sound like I knew what I was doing. So for my argument, I imitated by running my hand through my hair and chuckling for a bit.
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“Heh, well it managed to sneak in when I wasn’t looking. But killing it was no problem. Man, zombies are so weak nowadays.” Yeah, I’m definitely gonna fool him. Then, Ashton pulled out the one thing I didn’t consider.
“So...can opener huh?” Crap.
“Well, I..uh…” I was so flustered by Ashton’s smirk that for a moment I kinda forgot how to speak. “I eat a lot of soup okay?” Ashton then sighed and got up.
“Geez, you are damn lucky you know that.” Embarrassed, I blushed and stared at the ground. He’s so mean, but he has a point. I then noticed the corpse was still on the ground. An unbearable stench was emanating from it. I gotta throw this out. It’ll attract a lot of rats and crows. Besides, corpses take a while to decompose. My stomach started growling again. Great, now I have to deal with being hungry with Ashton silently judging me. Although since I didn’t finish my soup when I splashed it during the scuffle, I was filled with a weird curiosity. I picked up one of the arms and tore it off the body. The dried skin was covered in green mold. It was very gross, but my growing interest had overtaken me. With that, I opened my mouth and slowly brought the arm toward it.
“What the hell are you doing?” I paused and looked up to see Ashton staring at me with a disgusted look on his face. Okay, now I had no excuse, I just had to ask.
“Uh...I’m hungry...Can I eat this?” After the last word escaped my mouth, the arm was immediately slapped out of my hands. “What the-”
“Don’t. Even. Think about it.” I shuddered as his icy eyes dug into my psyche. He’s really easy to piss off.
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“Right. Sorry.”
“Good” He nodded and walked off. “Now, throw that thing out. It smells like shit.” a I sighed and got up, dusting myself off. Man, I should really get my act together. I picked up the corpse which was surprisingly light, but the repulsing smell was now inches from my nose. I almost gagged as I tossed it into the street. Yikes, I don’t know why I almost ate that thing. Hunger can make you do weird things. I’ll have to talk to Ashton about it.
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