《I am the Night》Chapter 12: Clayface
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Selina felt faint. Blood rushed to her head and her vision distorted as she came to grips with the fact that Julie's man was the Batman. Her Batman. Bruce fucking Wayne. She fell to her knees beside the couch and then took the salve from him and rubbed some on her palms. "Are you here to kill me?"
"No, I'm here to have you rub that on my back and to find out why you needed the money. Also, I need to take the jewelry back." Wayne said, "Which Doctor do you like best? I think I am still a 4th Doctor man myself."
Selina rubbed it over the scratches she put on his back, she winced looking at her handy work. In fairness, she never thought she would see him again and it was more of a hate fuck than a loving encounter. "I'm sorry. This looks like it hurt a lot."
"Let me guess... Hmm, I'll bet you are a Matt Smith girl."
"David Tennet, " She said, "I steal to raise money for Saint Swithin's Orphanage, I'm not proud of it though and I feel rotten that you caught me in the act."
"Saint Swithin's Orphanage, is it having trouble covering its operating expenses or something?" Wayne asked he moaned pleasantly as she rubbed some more of the salve into his wounds.
"It's partially funded by the church, but they only give the kids the bare minimum. I grew up there so I try to pay it forward for raising me." She noticed her hands were shaking, "Are you going to take me to the police?"
"How much do you give them each month through stealing?" Wayne laughed and said, "I haven't watched any of the Jodi Whittaker episodes, she's not bad is she?"
"10k sometimes less if it's a bad month."
"I can tell you aren't using it for yourself, this place is a dump. You know that isn't sustainable right? I mean you were bound to be caught eventually. You like the adrenaline boost it gives you, you get off on it. It's the same with me being the Batman. You know, I work out six hours a day? Crazy right? Anyway, I get what you are doing. It's Robin Hood."
Selina realized that she was crying as she tried to say, "It was my favorite story as a little girl."
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"Ok, so here's the thing... Wait, how much do you make at the bar each month?" Wayne asked.
Selina wiped her eyes, "3500 a month after tips."
"Ok, you are going to quit that job, and starting tomorrow you'll be working with me. I'm going to be paying you 15k a month, plus bonuses, health benefits, 401k, yadda yadda. Since we both know that you'll start stealing again if I don't watch over you, you're going to be my new sidekick. Since you like Robin Hood, you'll be called Robin. Batman and Robin. See? It even sounds natural."
"You are paying me to be your girlfriend?"
Wayne laughed and then shook his head. "You're going to fight crime by my side. I'll teach you how to be a detective, how to fight, how to discipline yourself to get that adrenaline high daily instead of stealing to get it sporadically."
"Then, you are doing this because..."
Wayne looked back at her and smiled at her, "Because I don't want to have to kill you."
"I need to think about this, I don't know if I am ready for this kind of commitment." Selina chewed on her lower lip. "To be Robin, what will I have to wear."
"Sexy Robin Hood costume." Wayne said without looking away from the TV, "Relax, I'm kidding, alright? To do what I do, you'll need a similar suit to what I wear, a combination of Nomex with Kevlar. A few armor plates in specific spots.
"I was ok with Sexy Robin Hood..."
Wayne did a double-take, "Ahh you are just fucking with me." He laughed and then said, "Selina, I am not making this offer lightly. My vision for Gotham City doesn't have room for Cat Burglars."
"Why do I feel like I am playing the game where I have to choose between marry, fuck, or kill?" Selina slumped back against the couch.
Basil Karlo watched as Katherine left for her job. As soon as he heard her motorcycle speed off, he jumped up quickly, much too quickly for a man of his age. He walked over and took his hat off the coat rack and slid on his raincoat. He pulled a duffle bag out of the closet and then his face started to morph into the face of a young man. He looked at this new face in a mirror and then spoke using a different voice, a different accent, "The rain falls mainly in Spain."
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He walked out to the street where a cab pulled up and asked, "You called for a cab?"
He spoke as the young man with a Texas accent, "Yes sir, I need to get over to the Wayne Entertainment buildings in Old Gotham."
"Terrible thing that happened to that Julie Madison, huh? She was something else." The cabbie looked into his rearview mirror and thought he saw the man's face ripple. "The hell?"
"Hey partner, what did y'all see just now?" Basil asked as reached into his duffle bag, "Something wrong with my face?"
The cabbie shook his head, "No, I've just been in this hack too long, my vision wasn't steady. I think you'll be my last fare."
Basil smiled and said, "That's probably for the best."
As they pulled up to the Wayne Entertainment lots Basil said, "Y'all see that alley just over yonder? Go ahead and drop me off there."
The cab pulled up to that spot and then the cabbie shut off the meter and said, "That's 25.50."
Basil slid a long knife out of his bag and then he stabbed it through the driver's seat and straight through the man's heart. "I thought we had agreed that this would be your last fare?" After pulling the blade back out, he cleaned it using the cabbie's shirt. His face distorted again until it was the Clayface monster he had played so many years ago.
He hopped a wall that lead to the area of the sound stages being used for 'The Man of Clay' and then casually walked into the building being used. One of the crew noticed Clayface walking in a strange area and called out, "Mr. Snyder, they called for you at the set."
Clayface turned to the man and then spoke as Bixby, "I'd buy that for a dollar!"
The crew member laughed, "Good one Mr. Snyder!" and then went back to whatever task he had been assigned.
The director saw Clayface walking in his direction and frowned, "God damn it, I must have told that dickhead makeup artist a thousand times... I do not want the old Clayface! What does he send me... 1940s Clayface. I'm sorry Bixby, I know it's not your fault. You just wear what we tell you to wear."
"I'm not dirt, I'm a man!" Clayface moaned ominously.
The director laughed, "Jesus Bixby, that was a perfect Karlo,"
Clayface grabbed the director's head and then twisted it until there was a sickening crunch. The dead director's body fell to the floor as Clayface released it. Laughing Clayface turned and walked away.
By the time he reached the door, only the cabbie was walking away. The cabbie walked over to the back wall and hopped over it. The cab drove back to his original pickup point near the Karlo mansion. Basil grabbed the cabbie's dead body from the back seat and then moved him back to the driver's seat. He reached into the cab and then put the cab in drive and let it start drifting back down the road.
Basil then nonchalantly returned to the mansion, placed his hat and coat on the rack, and then went back to his bedroom. It was time for his afternoon nap.
"You're right. I don't understand why we are watching a 105-year-old man's house. He's 105, what could he even do if he left his house?" Selina shook her head.
Wayne smiled cockily, "That's how he gets away with it. Just watch. Here, see that cab, that's going to be him, watch."
Selina watched as the cab pulled up. Then watched as Basil brought the dead body from the backseat into the front with the ease of a parent lifting their small child. They then watched as the cab rolled away picking up speed until it slammed into the back of a parked car. "How did you know?"
Wayne wiggled his eyebrows, "He forgot to turn the cab's sign back on."
"What do we do now? Run down there and punch him? Fuck him?" Selina asked seriously.
Wayne looked at her disgustedly, "Why would you say fuck him?"
Selina shrugged, "Well I only saw you as Batman that one time, and I mean... Come on, what happened? We fucked, right?"
Wayne thought about trying to explain himself and instead said, "Punch him, yes. Or shoot him, whatever leads to the result we need. Clayface being dead."
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