Chapter 13- Personal issues

Keith wanted to back out so badly.

Enteico had shown up a while ago and had asked him to speak with Yokubo. He was no doubt planning something, maybe some sort of reunion or intervention so they could clear the air between each other. He had asked Keith and Yokubo to come to an old workshop nearby, with no further details.

Classic Enteico.

Keith entered the small, but relatively clean inn near the farmlands where Enteico mentioned he saw Yokubo while they were burying the body of the Assassin that had initially broken into their shop.

"Hi, how can I help you?" The innkeeper asked. She was a young woman, a few years older than Keith and had deep-seated eyes. She had a warm and welcoming smile as she spoke to Keith.

"Hi. I'm uhh...looking for someone." Keith said, unsure of how to phrase himself.

The woman giggled. "Aren't we all?"

Keith laughed. "No, I mean I need to speak with someone at your inn. She's about my height with purple hair. And she wears this necklace that looks like an arrowhead."

The woman nodded. "She's right behind you."

Keith instinctively held his hands above his head to protect himself as he spun around.

Yokubo sighed as she put down her bag of groceries. She didn't seem happy that Keith had shown up. "What are you doing here?"

"I…We need to talk about something."

"I'm not interested in talking about anything except the truth."

Keith looked at the woman and the other people waiting to check into the inn. "Could we do this in private then?"

Yokubo sighed. "Fine."

Yokubo brought Keith to her room upstairs. It was a cozy room with a small fireplace and a small window that gave a nice view of the fields that now held very few crops. The harvest was over and the town was busy arranging for the goods to be sold.

"Talk. And no stupid jokes while you're doing it." Yokubo said harshly.

"Aww, man. I thought you loved my jokes." Keith chuckled, playfully punching Yokubo lightly on the shoulder.

The stern look on her face didn't go away. Somehow, she looked even more annoyed now.

"Yokubo, I wish I could tell you. I do. But I can't."

"Why? Is there someone who'll show up out of nowhere and kill you if you do? Some sort of invisible boogieman?" Yokubo asked.

"Alright. Sarcasm. I'll take that over the cold silence route."

Keith opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Yokubo noticed that his hands were clenched into fists, visibly shaking.

"Yokubo, I owe you an explanation. But I can't give one to you. I know that Shujin was important to both…to all of us. And I know that this seems unfair…" Keith said.

"Unfair?! Unfair?! Keith, yesterday was the shittiest day of my life! Shujin took me and my father in, gave us a home, a purpose…he gave me a life. Now, I find out that the Assassins, who I've despised for so long since I thought they lied to everyone about you, were actually telling the truth!"

Keith was silent for a while.

"Do you honestly think I didn't care about my grandfather?"

Yokubo didn't know how to answer, until she sat down, fiddling with the necklace she had.

"I know you did, Keith. That's exactly why I need to know why you ki…why you did it." Yokubo said.

"I can't tell you."

Yokubo let out a cry of frustration. "Why not?! Why not, Keith?! You could tell Francy but you can't tell me? Especially when I'm the one on your side?"

Keith stayed silent.

Yokubo calmed down, taking a deep breath. "I don't know what happened. I know this must be hard for you. But you have to tell me the truth."

Keith felt his blood boil.

"Why can't you understand that I'm not ready to tell you?" Keith asked his voice slightly higher than usual.

Yokubo took a deep breath before speaking. "Maybe, just maybe, because I've been through so much more shit with you than anyone else. I've stuck by your side when the clan threw you out, I've done everything I can to ease your pain."

She stood up, clenching her fists, trying to fight her tears. "I've been your friend since we were 10! Just because Francy chose not to side with you, doesn't mean I won't. You say you're not ready, but when will you be? When will you tell me?"

Yokubo waited patiently for an answer from Keith, some faint flicker of hope inside desperately wished that she would get what she wanted.

But ultimately, she knew it was all pointless. Whatever had happened had left Keith too scarred. Too afraid to trust anyone with the truth ever again.

There was a knock on the door.

"Ma'am, lunch is ready. Would you like me to bring the menu?" The woman from downstairs meekly asked, trying to pretend that she hadn't heard their argument.

Yokubo sighed. "Yes, please."

The woman closed the door and left.

"I should probably leave," Keith said. His voice was weak and quiet.

"Yeah," Yokubo said, her icy tone returning.

Keith turned around, but then remembered why he was here in the first place.

"Enteico asked us to meet up at the old workshop nearby. I know that you can't look past what I've done, but at least go easy on him. You made some pretty harsh claims. It's got him doing some really risky things." Keith said, opening the door.

"You still don't get it, do you, Keith?"

Yokubo was right behind him.

"It's not about what you did. It's the fact that you won't tell me the truth. It's the fact that after all we've been through, you're still not honest with me. Don't I…"

Keith could hear her sniffing behind him. She tried to calm down her breathing.

Just tell her! Just tell her!

But all that he could think about was the blood. The way his grandfather clung onto his body as the life drained from his body, as only one question screamed in Keith's mind.

Why did you do it?

Sometimes, not even Keith was sure if he had the answer. It seemed like the right choice back then. But after all that had happened, all the pain he had caused…

"Don't I deserve that? Don't I deserve the truth?"

Her voice was broken. Keith remembered when he first met her. Just like Francy, the two of them were so lost. So scared of the future.

"You do. But I can't give that to you. I'm…I'm sorry."

Yokubo didn't say anything. Keith couldn't bear to turn around and look at her.

As Keith left the room, he heard Yokubo mutter something.

"You can't keep running from the past, Keith. Eventually, it catches up with you. And when it does…you can't face it alone."

"I've survived this far by myself. I can handle it."

"Then I guess you don't need my help anymore."

Keith didn't reply. He slammed the door behind him and walked downstairs, wincing as he heard Yokubo throw something against the wall upstairs.

Just before he left, however, Keith saw a mirror near the entrance. He stood and looked at the mirror for a while.

Did I make the right choice?

Keith ran his fingers through his hair and cleared his throat. Taking a deep breath, he adjusted his jacket to look relatively cleaned up.

"So, Yokubo…what happened actually was…"

He shook his head and then looked in the mirror again, pointing his fingers at the reflection with a cocky smile.

"Hey, Yokubo! If it isn't my favorite purple-haired Assassin of all time…no, no…that's stupid. I don't even know any other purple-haired Assassins in the first place."

Keith tapped his chin as he looked around to check if anyone was in the waiting area with him. Thankfully, it seemed everyone was busy eating lunch in their rooms.

He turned around to the mirror and saw a bundle of flowers in a vase. Picking them up, Keith held it up to the reflection, as if he was gifting it to a person.

"Yokubo, you deserve the truth. You deserve someone who can honest with you. That's why I'm going to tell you everything. No more secrets. I promise."

The reflection mimicked his movements as he lowered his head and spoke.

"I did it because…I…it was the only way. I…he…damn it! Why is this so hard?!"

Keith looked up. Even his reflection looked disappointed in him.

"I wish I could tell you everything Yokubo. I wish I could stop running from my past. From Francy. I wish I could tell you about what grampa actually wanted the Assassins to become. I wish…I wish I could tell you…that I lo…"

"Excuse me, sir? Those flowers aren't for sale!"

Keith spun around, his face red at being seen. He quickly threw the flowers at the woman who was bringing the menu up to Yokubo's room and ran away.

The woman put the flowers back and giggled as she entered Yokubo's room.

______________________________________________________________________________________

Enteico licked the back of his hand. The chicken gravy needed a little extra salt.

Adding a pinch of salt, he turned around to see how the exterior of the pie had turned out. Thankfully, the delicious smell wafting into his nostrils more than assured Enteico that he had followed the recipe instructions correctly.

Looking outside, he saw that no one had appeared near the workshop yet. He had asked Keith to talk to Yokubo, hoping that the two would resolve their situation. Since Enteico never knew about Keith's past, he didn't see it as a huge problem.

And despite everything he had heard, he knew that deep down, Keith had his reasons for what he did.

Keith might have been a drunken, unhygienic, sarcastic and occasionally annoying asshole, but Enteico figured that's what most friends were like.

This group intervention would help clear the air and address a lot of problems the group had recently. Yokubo and Keith would talk through their problems, Enteico and Yokubo could reconcile and hopefully, Keith and Felix could come to an agreement.

Though that last one was highly unlikely.

Enteico set out the dishes and looked at his Pokia. It was almost afternoon. Where were they?

As he waited for them, he was slowly beginning to accept the fact that he wanted the team to reconcile for an entirely selfish reason. Enteico didn't give a crap about the town. He could give maybe half a crap about the people, but that was probably pushing it.

The reason why he wanted them to stick together was entirely selfish. And an extremely pathetic one.

Enteico wanted friends.

As laughably simple as it sounded, Enteico couldn't remember the last time he had a group of his friends invite him to hang out. Or write to him. Or invite him to a party.

He called them a team, but to him, they were more than that.

They were the reason for his hope. They were the reason that, for the first time in many years, Enteico didn't feel like his life was running into a dead end. An inescapable brick wall that he tried countless times to break down, but never succeeded.

With them, Enteico had finally made a dent in that wall.

With them, he could be himself and not have anyone judge him for past actions.

With them, he didn't feel so…alone.

Enteico dug his fork into his pie and ate the gooey and cheesy meat-stuffed pastry. It danced around his tongue momentarily before bursting with flavor.

It was probably one of the few dishes he rarely messed up.

Enteico wished he could share it with them.

As the hours passed, Enteico realized no one was coming. Although he was a little upset that his plan hadn't worked, he didn't care too much about it. He could understand that they still needed to take some time and process what had happened over the last few days.

Enteico sat alone at the table, imagining his friends at the table, laughing and smiling. Keith making jokes, Yokubo silently trying to knock Keith unconscious and Felix yelling at Keith for snatching a piece of his pie as Felix was about to eat it.

The image brought a smile onto Enteico's face as he bit into another chunk of the pie.

They would have their own problems, but Enteico decided he would help them get through their obstacles no matter what. They would become better together.

As he looked at the table though, his smile vanished. He had a big problem.

Now, how am I going to finish all this pie?

________________________________________________________________

The bar was relatively empty the next day. Psoli and the Platoon had set out on a mission with a few adventurers. Some rumors were going around that the Assassins who had retreated from the fight had a nearby camp.

Psoli planned to stop any future attack from the clan of Assassins once and for all.

As such, it was relatively smooth going for Enteico. Being in slightly better spirits, he asked the bartender for his usual mango smoothie. Enteico was one of the few people who actually ordered the item, but the bartender was always slightly pleased to see the merchant and Keith in his bar. When they didn't break anything, that is.

"How was your first experience with alcoholic drinks?" The bartender asked, spraying some whipped chocolate cream onto the top of Enteico's smoothie.

"Hmm. Unpleasant, but it had a kick to it." Enteico said.

"To be fair, you did order the strongest drink we had and you drank it neat. That usually kills people. Or gives them one hell of a hangover." The bartender said, using his cloth to clean the counter.

"Huh. Cool. I guess I can't get drunk or get alcohol poisoning now." Enteico said, looking at his sword.

"Perhaps you should teach that skill to Keith."

Enteico snickered. "I wish I could, but I don't think he acts the way he does because he's drunk. Though that's hard to say, considering the only thing he drinks most of the time is Moon Juice."

"Speaking of which, Keith took nearly half of our stock of Moon Juice recently. Even the bottles that he made himself."

The merchant sighed. "Yeah."

"Personal issues?"

"Yeah."

"Ever since the attack, he just orders his drink and leaves. No antics or any of his usual shenanigans. I wish I could say that it's a nice change of pace, but quite frankly, there isn't a day that goes by in which I don't look forward to seeing you two here."

"Heh. Yeah, must be great seeing two losers struggling to find their path." Enteico said, sipping on his smoothie.

"And eventually finding it. Personally, I think that's why you two are my favorite customers."

Enteico looked at the bartender. The man was usually always acted professionally while he was working, but that wasn't what made his establishment successful in particular. The man was probably one of the most kind-hearted people Enteico ever knew and extremely wise.

He always said that there were lessons to be learned from other people's sorrow and grief. Being at a bar meant he would meet a lot of people who were going through their own personal torments.

But, occasionally, he would see those same people the next day, smiling and eager to continue down their own path in life, no matter how treacherous the journey may be.

"Thanks, Ted," Enteico said, chewing on a piece of mango.

"Don't mention it. Personally, I don't think alcohol suits you."

Enteico laughed. "Fair enough. I'll stick with the smoothies then."

As the bartender continued serving customers like any other day, Enteico heard the door open behind him. Felix sat on the barstool to the left of Enteico.

"Hey, Enteico."

"Felix! Didn't expect to see you here."

Felix scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "Yeah, sorry. I had some stuff to take care of yesterday, so I couldn't show up as you asked."

"Some stuff? Here in Spiti?"

"Yeah. Some old acquaintances wanted to catch up."

"Oh. I see."

Felix didn't need to look at Enteico's face to know that the merchant didn't believe him. What Keith had said the day they fought Francy clearly made Enteico cautious of the blacksmith.

Goddamn Assassin.

"Do you two always look this depressing when you're at the bar?"

Yokubo took another seat to the left of Enteico. She ordered a drink from the bartender and flipped her hair over her shoulder.

"Bit…Enteico. Listen…I'm really sorry about what I said…" Yokubo muttered.

"It's fine. Besides, it's not like it wasn't the truth." Enteico said.

"I didn't mean to call you weak…"

"I am. No amount of sugar-coating will change that."

Yokubo looked at Enteico. The merchant seemed to have an edge that he didn't have the last time she saw him.

"Francy was a wake-up call for me. You, Keith and Felix…you guys are not always going to be watching my back. This sword might be powerful, but right now, a lot of people are getting hurt because I can't use it properly. Like they say, with great power, comes great…" Enteico said, looking at the sword.

"Moon Juice." The bartender said, pouring Yokubo a glass of the drink.

"Thanks," Yokubo said, gulping the liquid down in one go before sighing in satisfaction.

Enteico and Felix looked on in awe and slight terror as she downed three whole bottles of Moon Juice within a minute.

"Woo-hoo! Now THAT'S some good Moon Juice" said Yokubo, her face slightly flushed.

"You should thank Keith. His process of brewing Moon Juice yields a far more delectable liquor than most other suppliers I've dealt with. I trust you two know each other." Said the bartender, oblivious to Enteico and Felix's subtle warnings for him to stop talking behind Yokubo.

"Yeah, I do. Or at least, I thought I did." Yokubo said, pushing the empty bottle of Moon Juice away from her as the goofy smile on her face faded away.

"I take it that you and Keith didn't work things out," Enteico said.

"That's an understatement." She said, slightly hiccupping as she looked up at the ceiling.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Asked Enteico.

"Enteico, she just drank three whole bottles of a sub-par alcoholic drink. Do you think she's ok?"

"Point taken. Although, never call Moon Juice sub-par in from of Keith or else he might actually arrange for you to get gangbanged in the middle of the street."

Felix laughed. "I think you give him too much credit. He can't do that. Can he?"

Enteico and Yokubo stared blankly as if they were remembering something mind-numbingly terrible. Both of them turned to Felix. "Yeah...yeah. He can't." They mumbled unconvincingly. Yokubo took out a hairband and tied her hair into a bun. It was a little longer than usual as she didn't feel like cutting it recently.

"I wish there was something to talk about. The problem is, Keith's the one who isn't talking. All because he says that he isn't ready. The fuck is that supposed to mean? Am I just supposed to accept that and put it behind us? Do we just go back to the way things were and pretended that it never happened?" She asked, her voice unsteady.

"I think you should give him a chance."

Yokubo and Felix looked at the merchant, now using his finger to scoop all the remaining cream at the bottom and licked it off.

"Even though he kept a secret like that from me? No. No way." Yokubo scoffed.

"Look, I've been friends with Keith for a while..." Enteico said.

"And I've known him for a lot longer." Yokubo immediately said.

Enteico nodded. "I know. I know. But Keith's not the type of person that you can force the truth out of."

"But still..." Yokubo protested.

"Let me put it to you this way. If this is really because Keith doesn't trust you, then why did he go to your place to try and explain himself?" Enteico asked.

Yokubo opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out.

"If you really do know Keith as well as you say you do, then you know that he isn't the type of person to express his emotions or ask for help with his problems, even when he clearly needs it. I mean, I can't even remember the last time he told me anything about his personal life." Enteico said.

"So, I'm just supposed to forgive him?" Yokubo asked, genuinely.

Enteico shook his head. "No. From what I can tell, he needs to be honest with you. But what you haven't noticed is that he's trying. And Keith isn't the type of person to waste his time trying to do something if he doesn't really care about it."

Yokubo shifted her stool slightly to stretch her legs. "Then what do I do?"

"Keith's like a toddler when it comes to emotional stuff. He tends to run away from most serious situations. So, my advice is to wait for him. He'll tell you when he's ready. But it's your choice if you want to wait or to cut him off from your life."

Yokubo sighed. "I don't know, Enteico. I don't know what I want to do."

Enteico smiled. "You will. When the time comes. But, if there's one thing Keith's taught me; it's that the past is overrated. The present? Now that's where all the good stuff happens."

Felix chuckled. "I didn't know you were going through a Zen phase, Enteico."

"I didn't know that you are about to get a severe pay cut for slacking off, Felix," Enteico said with a smug grin.

Yokubo laughed as Felix and Enteico argued about their work schedule now that the shop was destroyed.

Keith smirked as he watched them clack their drinks and chug them down as he stood outside the bar looking through the window, unbeknownst to them.

We probably need to re-evaluate which one of us is the wingman, Enteico.