“Emotions burn the way forward from the cold chains of logic the bind us on our path.”

Trees blur past me as I employ every evasive trick I know to shake my angelic pursuers. The dense forest makes gaining ground difficult, but at least it’s hard to spot me from the air. Getting found and once more having a conflict would be very bad, I need time to practice using Perenia’s energy. I keep running for the entire day till the sun is around an hour away from setting. The further away I am, the exponentially harder it is for me to be found. That one time when I was fifteen and decided to test myself by running for twenty-four hours straight actually pays off. I have no plans other than to get to a place I can recollect myself. Regardless of my physical exhaustion, I need to stop and figure out what the heck I’m going to do now.

Perenia says nothing, simply radiating mild concern.

My parched throat begs for me to find water. Through the low brush, I spot a clearing and a man-made structure. As I slow to examine it, the soreness of my muscles from both the fight and running catches up with me. The building is a medium-sized log cabin surrounded by well-kept berry bushes. It’s too convenient to pass up as temporary shelter, even if it means using my new teleport-time freeze-thing (I need a better name for it) on the owners.

To do due diligence and ensure that the scene is safe, I rest for a few minutes behind a tree observing the situation while I catch my breath. The high of battle and the rush of adrenaline is now fading, leaving conscious thought replacing it. From what I can see, there is an older man living in the house. I regret having to do it, but I will have to remove them at least for a night; I am essentially a fugitive here and need to conceal my every move.

As I prepare to move out from the forest, I hear the sound of padding footsteps along the gravel trail to the cabin. The owner of them is cloaked in a velvet red with a feminine form. Blowout? Did she manage to follow me, or did she just end up getting lucky? Either way this is regrettable. She studders to a walk as she approaches the entrance to the cabin, her expression a whirl of emotion I haven’t seen on her before.

I wince, “you said we can create just about anything with your power, right? There are several chemicals when combined can induce sleep, I have most of their molecular structures memorized, can you make them?”

Probably, but a far easier way would be to directly put her to sleep. I had a subordinate of mine be able to do something like that and copying what they did should be pretty easy for me. I will give you energy once you get close. That said, why not do the same with her as you did to the angel, surely that would be the easiest solution.

I swallow hard, “you’re right, it isn’t the most logical option, but I don’t want to be that type of person. She has done nothing but help me so far, I need to at least give her a chance to talk.”

Quietly stepping from behind the tree, I approach Blowout from behind as she nears the entrance. Perenia allows her energy to flow through me as she gives me a construct for a method of sleep.

“Epsil—!”

She collapses, asleep as I tap her between her shoulder blades. In one hand I catch her as she falls. Without looking, I raise my hand summoning my beam construct to remove the owner of the cabin, now at the entrance.

“What am I even doing.” Internal chaos that would usually be suppressed, rises to the surface unimpeded. Exhaustion clouds any critical thinking I would otherwise be doing.

I lay her on a plush carpet in the cabin and quickly fall asleep on the available bed.

* * *

Natural sunlight beams through a window. I slowly open my eyes, massaging my temples. Heavy feelings of realization lay firm in my stomach. To my relief Blowout still lies unconscious where I lay her the night before. My mind reels with budding plans for what I should do now, but nothing seems to result in the end goal for what I want—actually what do I want?

You aren’t the first person I’ve seen to lose themselves in the face of my power. Perenia of course is watching me as always. It’s more impressive that you were able to still make logical decisions in the fight. Although we aren’t safe even now, if I know anything about my sister, it’s that she is relentless. Fighting more of her angels is inevitable.

My heart pounds at remembering the thrill of fighting with Perenia’s god energy. “Thanks.” I sit up and adjust myself, “I absolutely need more time training with your power before I allow myself to fight again. Rushing into a situation without practice or preparation isn’t my style.”

To be honest you need it. With my level of power, you should be capable of taking on an army, forget one particularly skilled angel. Although for the first time, you did surprisingly well.

I raise my hand, flexing it into a fist, “I don’t think I’ve accepted that any of this is actually real yet. It all seems too fantastical for me to be in this situation. Last week, fighting meant waiting for the right moment and eventually pulling a trigger. Now, it means feeling air rushing around me as I burst forward, summoning guns, swords, and the beam construct I imagined when I was a kid. All while fighting superhumans that can deflect bullets and actually pose a threat to me without me having to kill them. I can hardly picture something I want more than exactly that.”

That’s great and all but that doesn’t change our situation now. I hate being the underdog in any situation, surely you have some idea of what to do now?

“No, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I don’t want to be the same person I was before, planning every step of what I’m going to do only to lose sight of what I want to feel. Staying alive seems like a good place to start and I don’t see a reason to change our original plan to defeat The Goddess of Justice.” I wince at Blowout’s sleeping form. “As for her…”

At a certain time in the past, I was known as ‘the goddess of curses’ for my maybe too frequent use of them on those opposing me. There is a certain one that can force another to comply with what the user commands. A few other gods use something similar to increase the number of followers they have.

I pause. “Maybe, if I were the same person I was a week ago, I would say yes. But now, I won’t. I refuse to cause any more suffering then is necessary, especially after what she’s done for me. Is it too much for me to want to at least try to be a good person?”

Hmm, you can do as you want. But do you think you can just talk her into not revealing our location?

“Maybe, I at least want to explain to her what happened.” I sigh, “when she wakes up.”

Alright then.

Restlessness aches through my limbs so I hop off the bed to do light stretches. Experimentally I bring a hand to my side and visualize a sword like I did yesterday. Perenia flicks her wrist transferring her energy to me. Just like before, the solid, near weightless sword appears in my palm. I can’t stop myself from grinning at the concept of capability flowing through me.

About that. There is quite a bit that you could have done better in yesterday’s fight. Perenia rests her head on a hand lazily. Mainly, how you frequently used my power without shaping it. Doing so is the least possible efficient way of using it and is why you ran out so quickly. I would advise you to find another way of dodging attacks aside from basic flight.

“That sounds great in theory, but how? Can I really do anything with your power? You said yesterday that could even create chemical compounds.”

“There are many ways, including manipulating air pressure, as well as any other method you can easily use in a fight” She smiles, “and yes we can do near anything that one of us can visualize. Doing something like replicating the ability of another is more complicated than creating physical objects, and usually requires intimate knowledge of how they weave their energy.

I let out a small laugh in anticipation of what I can do, “I can’t wait to do experimenting.”

Blowout twitches in a very not-sleep-like movement. I dispel the sword and continue the conversation.

“Where we go from here depends on the surrounding terrain. I regret not looking for a map now. Would you mind filling me in.”

There is—or was one of my major cities, Galena, to the south-west of about where we are. Also, somewhere nearby should be a rocky area with several quarries and mines. Otherwise, this forest goes all the way to the west coast with some smaller villages scattered throughout. My sister probably still mainly resides in her capital, Celestine, which is pretty far to the east.

“Far as in walking? Or far as in even with modern vehicles?”

Blowout has her back to me from where I can see her, one of her hands looks to be reaching into a pocket.

Perenia puts a finger to her chin, considering, “if I remember correctly, it’s a few day’s flight at top speed from my farthest east shrine. So quite far.”

“Well then, I won’t rush. I’ll probably spend the next few weeks in this forest where it is hard to find me from above. That seems like the best course of action. I can get used to using your power and practice tactics in that time as well.”

Blowout’s muscles tense, I casually observe while continuing “are there any dangerous wildlife that I need to be concerned about like any—”

Actions taking place in milliseconds, Blowout rolls while swinging a flame-covered palm. An expanding fireball explodes omnidirectionally. I thrust a hand outward and make a circle shield like I did before.

“WHY?!” She screams out.

The flame rebounds off the walls, I turn the circle into a sphere around me.

Her eyes pierce through the sea of flames, staring straight into me. “Why would you kill Righteousness?! Why would you help the Goddess of Power?!” A window bursts out from the heat.

Wow, I didn’t expect her to be immediately this violent. ‘Blowout’ isn’t for nothing. Guilt awakens in my chest as a solid weight.

Against intuition, the heat disperses very quickly leaving several smaller burning fires. My voice hardly changes infliction as I drop the shield, “I don’t own this place; would you mind not destroying it? Whatever you want to talk about, I’m open to discussion.”

Her expression of confused fury falters to embarrassment before back to intensity, “You don’t know how much good Righteousness has done! How could you just—just kill her like that! I—I trusted you!”

I put my hands out to show that I have no intention to fight “I deceived you, yes, I admit that. But we can talk about—

She balls her hands into fists as she continues her emotional outburst, “I so want to believe that you’re innocent! Tell me that the Goddess is controlling you or—or anything! You don’t know how much evil she has done, or you wouldn’t be helping her!

Typical. Perenia tilts her head with a hint of disgust.

Swallowing, I keep eye contact, “I have done everything of my own free will, and no I am not at all innocent in all of this. Does that change how you see me?”

Her face contorts in disbelief, “there are so many people who will suffer from your actions. I don’t know much about you or what you want, but I know that there has to be a better way than this!”

I wince, “you misunderstand quite a bit of what happened, and I can explain if you will listen. I am aware of what I’ve done, and I’m not looking for forgiveness.”

Not yet done, she grits her teeth and looks down with tears in her eyes. “The Goddess of Power and the war she waged caused so many innocent people to be killed or hurt. Her awakening will cause so much division that we have spent so long trying to clear!”

One second.

I lower my voice in attempt to placate her “Once you’re ready, we can talk with reason.” Then to Perenia, but still out loud, “I can relay something if you want to reply to her.”

“She’s… here?” Blowout recoils in shock with a hint of fear.

“You talk about me like I can’t hear you.” Perenia’s annoyed voice rings in my ears instead of purely in my head. Blowout jerks backwards, indicating she heard her as well.

“War goes both ways, girl. Your goddess caused just as much death and suffering as whatever your exaggerated stories say I did. ‘History is written by the victors’ as some say.”

Blowout looks about to passionately reply, before biting back a response. As she does, she drops a match from her right hand and lets out a pulse of air from her left, putting out the fires. Also happening to cause the weakened wall behind her to partially collapse. She purses her lips, “maybe we did bad stuff in the past too, but things can be different now.” Previous emotion drains from her face leaving uncomfortable concern, “since you were lying about everything else, can you at least tell me who you are?”

Despite knowing that she is next to a dangerous deity she continues anyway? Does she have no sense of self-preservation? “I’m Epsilon, that’s who I am. It isn’t who I used to be, but it’s who I am now. If that makes sense.”

The smell of burnt wood permeates the small cabin. A cold morning breeze stirs up bits of ash through the openings. Blowout seems to be looking for the right words to say, so I’ll fill in the silence.

“You are mistaken about one key element of what happened.” She looks up quizzically, and I grin in response. “I didn’t kill the angel.”

“But I saw you—” She trails off.

I pick up a piece of a half-burnt twig to demonstrate, “what I did to her is like this”. Perenia understands what I’m doing and lets a trickle of her energy flow to me. I pulse the energy through the twig and it disappears.

I smile, “It’s gone right? From any perspective it clearly isn’t there anymore and nothing should be able to bring it back.” Blowout nods cautiously. “But it isn’t.”

My fingers snap, and I feel a twinge as Perenia’s energy is consumed. The twig reappears just as it was. That’s a relief, we didn’t have time to test it, so this ends up being the first time I see it as well. It would have been incredibly awkward if it hadn’t worked.

Blowout looks up with hope, “so Righteousness isn’t..."

“Yep, at any point we want I can return her exactly as she was. Not that it’s entirely an excuse for the effect it will have on others who believe otherwise, or for the time lost in between when I bring her back. But I am prepared to act selfishly for the sake of moving forward.”

She steps forwards with renewed energy, “then we can still resolve everything peacefully! We can arrange a meeting between the two goddesses and have them talk things out!

“Maybe, but that’s not the path I’ll take. Eventually I will defeat her in battle.”

“Both of you underestimate the bounds of the contortions my sister will make to justify opposing me.”

“But why? We can easily find a better way!” She seems almost to be pleading to herself.

I avert my gaze for blowout’s stare “Yeah, there is. That way is for another person though. This time I will feel alive even at the cost of others. The free movement of fighting is something I want more than I can communicate. I won’t repress myself and I won’t bind my actions either. If you want to condemn me as a terrible person for doing so, then I can’t blame you. I can also tell that Perenia has far more to communicate to the Goddess of Justice then can be said just with words alone.”

“I can speak for myself thank you.”

Blowout seems to consider something before putting on a strained smile, “I rushed ahead without considering the perspectives of others again, sorry.” Her amber eyes renew their resolve, “I think I can somewhat understand your reasoning. But it’s because of that I can’t allow you to continue on as you are now.”

“Are you going to try and stop me?”

“No, the opposite. I want to help you find a better way.” She looks to the side while furrowing her eyebrows as if holding something back, “I know I have lot behind me, and I really did want to teach at the academy, but this is more important. You don’t actually want to hurt others, do you?

I ignore the question, “you want to follow me? Why would you want that, especially after I deceived you?”

She bites her tongue, hesitating, “I’m sure that this sounds childish, but it’s because I want to be a hero like in the stories. Always resolving everything in a happy ending, never sacrificing their ideals for the best outcome.” She looks me dead in the eye with a forced smile, “I want to be like that, but I never had an opportunity. Here I am now, so I won’t give up the chance!”

A moving shadow deep in the forest catches my eye, “that’s fine with me. This is actually one of better outcomes of this situation. I didn’t want to remove you after you helped me. Do you have anything to say about the proposition, Perenia?

“It matters very little either way, so it’s up to you. I doubt that she has much power that we can use, but any follower is better than none.”

Blowout laughs relaxing her shoulders, not offended, “hey, I can fight you know. Maybe not quite on the level of a god, but I can easily hold my own in combat.”

“Then sure. You know more about the current situation in this country than either of us do. There are a few things that I will require you to agree to though. We can get to those later.” Several more shadow flit through the trees outside.

“I won’t hold you back.” Blowout nods.

“Good. Because it looks like we have a nice opportunity to practice.”

“Huh?” Blowout turns to see what I’m referring to.

Pure black bestial creatures twice the size of bears approach from the tree line. They have massive claws and fangs, as well as oddly placed sharp things along their body.

God energy pulsing through me causes the hairs on my arms to raise and a grin to form.

Two swords form in either of my hands, “get ready to fight.”