𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞

"M-i-r-a-c-l-e." Tootie spelled out her name as she wrote it on Jahseh cast. She drew a heart at the end of her name then look up at Jahseh.

"Am I done?" She asked him.

"Are you?" She tuck in her lips looking back at his cast. She placed a dot on her i then look back at Jahseh.

"Now, I'm done." She said happily, putting the cap back on the permanent marker.

"Yup." Jahseh nodded his head, looking at his cast. She had been drawing on it all afternoon while the rest of his family talked.

They had all gathered together at his grandfathers place for Thanksgiving dinner. Instead of hanging with all their cousins, Tootie and him were in the kitchen with each other. Jahseh wasn't in the mood to engage with any of his family members. It was Jason birthday and like he figured, everyone was acting like it wasn't a special day.

No one in his family mentioned the passing of his brother nor his birthday. It pissed him off, but he kept his cool by not being around them. He knew he would end up going off on them and he didn't want to do that in front of Miracle.

"Jah." Miracle called him and he look down at her.

"Wassup?" He asked, turning his body towards her. She leaned closer and he did the same so their faces were close.

"Do we say happy birthday?" She asked him, lowly so he was the only one that heard.

"Yeah, later." He answered and she nodded her head. He was going to take her to Jason gravesite later on, so they could see him. It's been awhile since Jahseh visited his brother and he felt as though today would be a good day.

"YOOOOO!" Calvin shouted walking in the kitchen with Keem and Javon. Jahseh let out a small sigh as his cousins walked over to them. He wasn't too fond of them because they were messy. Everywhere you go, one of them were in some shit and he wasn't into that. He stayed to himself, never mess with his family because why should he.

"Y'all just don't wanna be with the family huh?" Keem asked, speaking loudly for no reason.

"Your loud as hell!" Javon told him and he flip her off.

"Suck my dick, J." He retorted, Jahseh smacking his lips.

"Can you not." He spoke, Keem looking at him then sucking his teeth.

"Can you not." He mocked him then started laughing. "Nigga, acting like we can't curse and shit. Got me fucked up." Jahseh kept quiet, leaving his thoughts to himself. He was better silent than going on and causing a scene.

He leaned back down to Miracle, "I'm going to the store, so I can get you some candy. Are you going to be fine here?" He asked for assurance and she nodded her head.

"Aight." He helped her off the chair, getting up as well.

"Oh, we going to the store! I'm tagging along!" Javon exclaimed, heading out the kitchen.

"I didn't-"

"Shit I'm going to." Calvin cut Jahseh off, walking out with Keem. Jahseh pinch the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath.

He got himself together before heading out the kitchen. His aunts, uncles, and grandfather were all talking still. He was able to slip out the house without them noticing, his cousins waiting for him.

"I really didn't ask y'all to come." He told them, putting his hood on his head.

"We don't give a fuck nigga." Calvin retorted. Jahseh mumbled under his breath putting his hands in his pockets and started walking.

"You always wanna be alone man. We're your cousins, you suppose to be hanging with us." Keem said and Jahseh shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm not into what y'all do and that's really it." He told them.

"Oh yeah...Jahseh is the proper one. The goody two shoes, the child that's boujee as hell and think he's above everyone." Keem continued, waving his hands sarcastically.

Javon pushed him, "Cut it out." She told him and he flip her off. She put her arm around Jahseh, he sent a glare at her and she quickly moved it.

"Anyway, Jahseh isn't boujee, he's just not into the type of stuff we do. Doesn't make him boujee." She continued the conversation, nudging Jahseh arm a little.

"Well, the way grandpa talks about him, you'll think he's his only grandchild." Calvin mentioned and Jahseh automatically knew where this was going. The jealousy the cousin had on him wasn't because Jahseh was "better" but because of Wesley, who treated Jahseh slightly better.

And it wasn't like it was favoritism, even though, it look like it. It was more so, helping out his grandchildren who were in need of it. Calvin, Javon and Keem parents were good to them. Gave them everything, didn't press their issues and weren't the cause of them either. Their lives were fine, different from Jahseh.

"Nigga does treat him different from us..." Keem egged on, walking in front of Jahseh.

Jahseh roll his eyes, walking around his annoying cousin. "If y'all mad about it, talk to your parents and grandfather about it. I didn't ask for the help." He muttered the last part to himself. He really didn't care how his cousins felt about the situation. They didn't know what was going on and they didn't need to.

"Mane, whatever, cause it's not serious. I'm just stating the issue here, that's all." Keem shrugged his shoulders. As they all started talking, Jahseh tuned them out and walked faster.

He finally reached the store and wasted no time going inside. Since he already knew what he was looking for, he went down the aisles grabbing everything he need. His cousins had disappeared, but he was still able to hear their loud mouths. He went to the counter, placing his things on it and taking out his wallet. Javon came up to him, he glance at her before letting out a sigh.

"Yes?" He asked annoyed, paying for his stuff after the owner told him the price.

"Why you sound so mad?" She asked him.

"I'm not mad." He muttered grabbing his bag then walking off. Javon roll her eyes then followed after him out the store. She wasn't sure what Calvin and Keem were doing, but she knew they could handle their own. They'll eventually come back.

"So, cuz, what's been going on?" She asked, trying to have a conversation with him. Javon and Jahseh were never close, ever. The two cousins never hung out with each other, they didn't even speak to one another.

She had a closer relationship with Jason. They were the same age and their bond was unbreakable. Jason was always there for her to give her advice on relationships that went bad. He confronted her, made her laugh, and was overall fun to be around. That all changed when Jahseh was born and the two brothers bond was starting to form.

She fell back because she didn't want to come in between the two. She tried to be a fun cousin to Jahseh while he was a kid, but if you wasn't Jason, then he didn't give a damn. And it was still like that today, she just couldn't get to him at all.

"Nothing." Jahseh answered dryly, not wanting to have this conversation. He seen no point in it, he didn't even want to talk to her. And usually when he didn't want to talk to people, he would be straightforward and tell them that. But, being with Blu, she's teaching him to be nice about it.

Right now, he kinda wished he wasn't being nice about it.

Javon groaned, "Oh come on, Jahseh! You know I always tried having a connection with you, but the way you act is unbelievable. Your really stuck up, completely different from Jason." She remarked. Jahseh abruptly stopped in his tracks and turned to face her.

"I find it funny how y'all always seem to include Jason. Y'all tryna stay relevant or something?" He asked, aggressively causing Javon so roll her eyes.

"No one is trying to stay relevant. Your not the only that's taking his death hard, he was my cousin."

"And he was my fucking brother." He shouted at her. "Being his cousin don't mean shit when your his brother, his little brother at that. You think his death hit you hard, well it fucking didn't. You wasn't there, you didn't witness it right then and there. You don't have a hard time sleeping at night because all you see is your brother dead. Cut all that bullshit cause you don't care, none of y'all care."

"We do care. It's not my fault, your having a hard time with everything. You don't call anyone, you barely wanna be around us. That's no ones fault besides yours, Jahseh. You need to learn how to take responsibility." She said and Jahseh smack his lips.

"Javon, I don't give a fuck at all. I don't like y'all cause all y'all do is gossip about your own family. And don't say y'all don't cause I heard y'all talking about my sister in the damn living room earlier. Y'all all fake and phony, so fuck you and everyone else." He spazzed before walking away from her.

He was done with his family.

Blu tuck in her lips, looking around her room that was filled with girls she didn't know. Because Brittney mom wasn't having a dinner, Brittney ended up coming over to Blu house. Unfortunately, she brought over her friends and now they all were in Blu room. Why? Because that's where her dad sent them, so they all could hang out. And by hang out, they all were just sitting here in silence.

"This is so boring." Tiffany finally spoke, breaking the silence.

"Seriously, why did we even have to come over this boring ass house?" Kaycee asked, knocking down one of Blu basketball trophy. Blu clenched her jaw glaring at the girl.

"Oops." Kaycee said, shrugging her shoulders. Tiffany and Brittney started laughing and Blu roll her eyes. Blu look down at her phone seeing she was still on the phone.

Her and Jahseh were on FaceTime and had been silent for the past few minutes. She had him go on mute when the girls came in her room. She knew about Kaycee and how she still have feelings for Jahseh. It was pretty obvious too and Blu wasn't having it. Now, that the two of were dating, she wasn't going to be dealing with all the other girls and their nonsense.

All of it was dead the moment the two of them had sex.

"Wait, can we just talk about something really quick." Brittney said causing everyone to look at her. Blu noticed that she was staring dead at Angel who was minding her business.

"Angel..." she called her name making Angel look up.

"What?" She asked, seeing everyone staring at her.

"I thought we were all dressing up. Why the hell are you dressing like a bum?" Brittney asked, Blu squinted her eyes at her. Kaycee and Tiffany started chuckling and Blu was confused as to why.

"How am I dressing like a bum?" Angel asked.

"Sweats and a hoodie? That's dressing like a bum. What your dad can't afford to buy you nice clothes anymore?" Kaycee chimes in, snickering.

"Yeah, we're not doing this. Angel, come with me real quick." Blu spoke up, getting off her bed. Angel did the same walking over, Blu grab her hand and the two of them walked out her room.

They headed down the hall and went in the bathroom. Blu shut the door, locking it while Angel sigh taking a seat on the toilet.

Blu sat on the floor in front of her, "There was no way I was about to let that happen." She said, shaking her head. She wasn't into the whole bullying thing especially not in her own home.

"Thanks." Angel thanked her, brining her knees to her chest.

"Your welcome. Now, tell me Angel, why the hell are you hanging out with them bitches?" Blu asked her bluntly, Angel sigh bringing her knees to her chest.

"Because I don't have anyone else." Angel answered and Blu frown.

"Sorry to hear that." She said and Angel shook her head.

"Not like that. I don't have any siblings, so I don't have anyone else to be around." She clarified.

"Oh, but why them out of all people? They're terrible friends Angel and your so nice." Blu said.

"I know, but I don't have anyone else. My life is terrible in my eyes and I hate it."

"How come?"

Angel sigh again, "You see my dad is a business owner and he makes lots of money. My mom ended up leaving us because he cheated on her, so she dipped and I stayed with my dad. He wasn't a very caring parent and instead of taking care of me, he just thrown gifts at me. I was young being gifted expensive things and that was dads love language. I grew up thinking that was the way and I ended up meeting girls that was just like me. I know they were assholes, but they were the only ones I hung around. It's stupid really and you probably think I'm dumb."

"I think your dumb." Jahseh spike causing Blu to look at her phone.

"Jahseh." She called his name.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way. But, she dumb for hanging out with Kaycee and Brittney dumb asses." He cleared up, Blu rolling her eyes and Angel shook her head.

"He's right, but you could've said it in a different way Jahseh." Angel spoke to him.

"I'm sorry, lemme mind my business." He said then going quiet.

Blu shook her head, "Sorry for him. Anyway, Angel, your a really nice person and you shouldn't be hanging out with them. You better than me cause I would've already whooped all they asses especially Brittney." She said and Angel chuckled.

"Yeah, I'm trying to find my people though. But, it's hard when people think your the mean girl and don't wanna be around you."

"Ooh, girl ion give a fuck about that mean girl shit." Blu said standing up to her feet. "You my people now, so fuck the rest of them."

"Why are you so nice?"

"Why not?"