《The Raven Girl》The Raven Girl- chapter 29
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I had nightmares of tartan and shortbread and a monster looming out the greeny gray depths of Loch Ness with bag pipes and an orange wig. There was something so unbelievable obscure and almost tacky about going on a quest to see the Loch Ness monster. I had been to Loch Ness as I child and remember the stunning scenery and breath taking views but I also remember the little stalls alongside the road selling general niff-naff of cuddly toy Nessies and fridge magnetics which made the visit seem so commercialized and fake. To me the Loch Ness monster was not a mythical creature but a money spinning tourist franchise and no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t separate the two. In fact in my nightmare I dreamt that Dante was stood on the foreshore of the lake in a large oversize I
I drifted in and out of sleep for a few hours more and woke up when Dante dramatically yawned very loudly. I jumped slightly and stared up at him sleepily.
“What was that for?” I asked.
“I’m awake.”
“Well, I’m sleeping.” I said closing my eyes to go back to sleep.
Dante hand suddenly swept over my hair and he said in low voice, “I thought we could do what most couples do Sunday morning.”
“It’s Sunday evening.” I groaned.
“Which is the vampire Sunday morning.” Dante pointed out.
“All the couples I ever knew went to church on Sunday morning.” I replied flatly.
And then there was silence, not a deathly silence, but a thinking silence. Dante was trying to construct a witty retort and perhaps if it had been any other day I would have listened and maybe even laughed but the loch ness monster awaited. Rubbing my eyes I said casually,
“I had a weird dream last night about some magic dragon sword.”
“What?” The tone in Dante’s voice had suddenly become very serious.
“Yeah, there was some sword that was hidden in the mortal world and it was really powerful and the dragons were trying to get it.”
“Do you remember where this sword is?”
“Why? It was only dream.” I shrugged casually. I moved to get off the bed but Dante’s hand reached out and clamped down hard over my wrist.
“Lie back down,” he said trying to come across as friendly and calm, “Tell me about this dream.”
My eyes lightened up, I liked having this power over Dante usually he was the one with the upper hand making me dance like a goddamn monkey to do his bidding, but now the tables have turned. Pulling my hand out of his death grip I shook my head,
“It would only bore you, most of it was crazy stuff like talking fruit and my old maths teacher doing the samba but there was this one bit that was so vivid, so crystal clear it almost seemed like a memory.”
“Tell me about the memory bit.” Dante said eagerly.
“The most powerful weapon of this world was hidden from both vampires and dragons in a place I had once visited as a child.”
“Where, tell me.” Dante asked desperately.
“I wish I could but it’s not exactly a place I can just pinpoint on a map. It is a place I would have to take you to personally.”
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“That’s fine, I can do that.”
“Dante are you serious? You’ve spent a good amount of time convincing me that the immortal realm is where I belong, now suddenly you want to take a road trip up into the mortal world. You’re not exactly being consistent Dante and consistency is an important aspect that is shared between married couples.”
“So is sex but you don’t see me complaining.”
“Abstinence is a virtue dear.”
“I could have you any time I wanted.” Dante smiled pinning me back against the cushions.
I hesitated and snapped, “So are we going to go and find this sword or not?”
Dante stared at me.
“If I take you up to the mortal world, you must promise one thing.”
“Anything.”
“Do not runaway.”
“There’s nothing left in that world for me to run too.” I replied bitterly.
Dante eyes narrowed and his jaw tensed. I raised my hand over my mouth and sarcastically said, “Whoops, sorry, I forgot I’m supposed to hide all this pent up angst about my forgotten family and fake life.”
“That wasn’t my making.” Dante snapped darkly.
Then why did I runaway? I didn’t say it out loud. I needed Dante to trust me enough to go and see Nessie. Instead I forced away all those feelings of animosity and smiled. Kissing Dante lightly on the nose I said,
“I know honey.”
Dante must have picked up on the insincerity in my voice because he abruptly rolled off the bed and left the room without making any excuse to leave. I squeezed my eyes shut, great, well played Ebony, now you’ve really pissed him off. Laying back against the pillows I shut my eyes for a few minutes. I wanted to clear my head. So many bad things had happened or rather had been revealed to me since I got here. I wondered if events could possibly get any worse. Suddenly I felt sleepy, unnatural sleepy.
“Those wings are nuisance.” Dante voice rang coldly through my mind.
I opened my eyes and I was stood in another part of the castle in a different time. The clothes were different, I was different and so was Dante.
“My wings?” I asked touching my shoulder.
“Your brother has explained about your deformity or rather your inability to shift.” Dante said cooly.
I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the far off window, my black wings folded behind me gently like a Christian angel. I always thought they were beautiful, I never thought of them as a deformity. Where I came from in the forest there was no concept of ugly and beautiful because that was not the way in which nature worked. To me a flower was no more prettier than the thorns that protected it but here in this court everything was judged by the vampire criteria of beauty and my wings had been deemed ugly by the crowd.
“Your Highness,” I said respectfully, “What am I to do to please you? I cannot will my wings away.”
“Ebony I would like you to meet someone this afternoon. He is a human doctor I found in the mortal world who deals with amputations. He would be willing to amputate your wings so you would look even more beautiful.” Dante said.
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“What does amputate mean?” I asked.
“To remove surgically.”
“I still don’t understand.”
“Ebony dear, the doctor will take some very sharp tools and cut off your wings.”
Dante read the terror in my expression and squeezed my shoulders gently.
“The doctor is the fastest in London. I personally watched him saw off a leg in less than thirty seconds and that includes stitching the wound. The process will be fast.”
“But the pain.” I croaked.
“The pain will be brief and it is a small price to pay for a reward that will last you a lifetime.”
I didn’t have the idea or the stubbornness in me to fight. I didn’t know how to fight. I viewed Dante’s point as a matter of fact, my wings were ugly therefore needed to be removed and in short the operation made sense but I couldn’t help feeling that if this was real love than he wouldn’t make me mutilate myself. The memory skipped time and I felt myself lying on my back shaking in agony surrounded by feathers and blood. My wings lay on a sheet on the other side of the room. The surgeon finished the last stitch and congratulated me, “The procedure has been completed madam.”
“Thank you.” I replied weakly.
A servant girl rushed in and gasped at the sight of blood and feathers, she quickly adjusted composure and said,
“His highness wants you to go down to the dining hall immediately. He wants to see the result of your operation.”
“I don’t feel well enough.” I murmured weakly.
“His highness insists. I will aid you how I can.” The servant replied.
Dante commands so I must follow. This is what love is, I told myself. The surgeon left and the servant help me up. I tried not scream when she dress me. I tried not to pass out as I walked out the room down the stairs to the other side of the castle where Dante was waiting for me. Every movement was agony. The dining hall was full and there was loud music and bright lights that made my head spin. Dante stopped everybody as I walked in. They stared at me and I looked for the approval in their eyes but there was nothing. I was still the freak. Dante clapped his hands jovially and told me to sit by him at the table. I moved slowly, each step causing agony to tear through my back.
“Amazing, the surgeon did a marvellous job, don’t you think Ebony?”
“I feel unwell, Highness.”
“Nonsense, have some wine.”
I looked up from across the table and saw my brother staring back at me, he was smiling. I came here to escape him and wound up as some other monster’s prey. The vampire saw me as nothing more than a curiosity that could walk and talk. Tears burned in my eyes but I tried to carry on. I called for a glass of water feeling very ill. My back was killing me, but the pain had changed. Instead of a dull aching pain, this pain was itching and burning. My clothes felt too tight. I grabbed Dante’s sleeve unable to vocalize my pain.
“What the devil are you playing at?” Dante snapped.
I stood up, shaking and went absolutely rigid. The orchestra went silent, couples stopped dancing and the room stared at me. Dante lowered his voice,
“Stop making a spectacle out of yourself.”
The pain in my back had transcended all previous pain barriers into whole new level of agony. I wanted to scream until my lungs collapsed but all I could do was open my mouth. My back burst open and blood and feathers burst through the seams of my dress. I fell forward across the tablet gasping as brand new set of wings pushed their way through the open wound. The world faded to black and for a short time I felt at peace.
“Have you lost your senses?” A man screamed.
“If I give her my blood then she might heal.” Dante yelled.
“If you give her your blood you might actually start feeling something for the girl.”
“I love her.”
“She’s a curiosity. A freak, you cannot be seriously thinking that this would ever be a consort.”
The voices faded and when I opened my eyes Dante was sat next to me. I looked up at him and saw bright red eyes with tears welling up and falling down. I reached out and touched him a warmness I had never felt before in his presence spreading through me. He spun his head round and looked down at me. I smiled. His sleeve was covered in blood. I touched my mouth and tasted his blood.
“What happened to me?”
His eyes widened and his eye brows knitted together, “I’m so sorry Ebony, forgive me, I nearly killed you by tearing your wings away. Please-”
I placed a finger over his lips and silenced him.
“Maybe we should try again. I will do whatever pleases his highness.”
“No. Never again. You must never subject yourself to pain again. I should have protected you.”
Something had changed about his mannerisms. He seemed more caring and genuine in his concern for me. I smiled softly. Everyone made mistakes right?
“Ebony, wake up!” Dante’s voice snapped me out of the dream. I opened my eyes and stared up at him. The dream had been so violent and cruel that if he hadn’t surprised me by looming over me in modern clothes, I would have slapped him for being so nasty. He had faded jeans on with a beat up leather jacket over a tight fitting white t-shirt, an odd contrast to the almost victorianesque style he favoured. I have to say seeing him dressed in my kinda of clothes against the back drop of the gothic castle was weird, Dante had become an anachronism. Dante read my expression and smiled,
“You like what you see.” He said.
“Don’t flatter yourself.” I said pushing him away.
The thought he would have subjected me to something so hideous and cruel made me hate him, but then my mind would gently remind me of the fall he took for me. So much conflict in my heart did not make thinking easy.
“What am I going to wear?” I said hesitating.
“I’ll have the seamstress fix you up something.” Dante said a little distantly.
“What about my wings? People are going to notice.”
“I say they are part of a costume.”
“Maybe I should just have them removed.” I said.
“What are you talking about?” Dante asked confused.
I shook my head, “Nothing. I’m just, I mean, forget it.” I said giving up.
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