《Our Own Forever》Eight: And I'm so used to letting go, but I don't wanna be alone.

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August 10th, 2017 - Thursday Casey’s POV

It was early. The sun not out yet; the sky still dark as Casey lay in bed. His sketchbook lay haphazardly beside him, the pages open to a half-finished picture of two glasses on a wood porch. Sadly, the healer had no desire to draw. Casey had woken up around three, still on the couch where he had dozed off only a few hours earlier, his shirt and sports bra drenched in sweat as he tried to catch his breath. The healer’s chest was tight as unwanted images sprung up behind his closed eyes, blood-covered hands, and glowing ruby-red eyes. Howls and screams were heard even when Casey opened his eyes, and they felt more real by the second.

Snarls echoed in his ears as Casey showered, the cold water waking him up further and proving that he wasn’t still asleep. After, once he was dry and not hearing a wolf pack in his head, Casey had stood in front of his closest with an appraising expression. His clothes consisted of solid dark colors unless Adam gave him something else, and today his eyes strayed toward the section more colorful than rest.

Eventually, he dawned his red Marvel t-shirt and dark jeans before plopping down on his bed. Casey drew for what only felt like minutes, but when he glanced at his phone, the time had jumped from four to six. Seeing that, pain flared in his hand and back from hunching over his sketchbook for so long, so Casey sat it to the side.

Now, lying back against a hodge-podge of pillows, Casey was thinking. It was a dangerous thing, especially in the early hours. The healer had immediately thought of Percy and how to tell the New Kid that he had no romantic feelings toward him. Yes, Percy was hot, but something about him unnerved Casey enough to override the initial attraction. Usually, Casey wouldn’t care about being brutally honest. Still, the New Kid had been kind, so he deserved that in return.

Casey thought about texting Adam to ask his opinion. Still, it was another hour at least before the other boy would wake up, and he wasn’t going to interrupt. Just because I have an elephant's sleep schedule doesn’t mean I get to ruin Adam’s perfectly normal one. Still, the healer knew that Adam was the only option for help. Casey had no other friends, and his parents were still in Spain for the foreseeable future, so his best friend was it. Who could have known that being an asshole with a severe dislike of most people would be a bad thing?

It wasn’t that Casey cared too much about Percy’s feelings, but being alone got...lonely. Coming home to an empty house every day, trying to fill the silence, it all took its toll on the boy. He had Adam, yes, but only for a handful of hours every day and on the weekends. Moments like these made Casey wish he had a soulmate the most, but he always shut those thoughts down. No use in being sad over something I never had.

With an exaggerated sigh, Casey threw his arm out to blindly grasp at the bedside table where his MP3 was supposed to be. Finally, his fingers closed around the plastic, and he pried the top off, plucking one cigarette from inside. Casey sat up to lean against the headboard while he smoked and tapped the back of his phone as he debated texting Adam. In the end, the decision was made for him. The opening notes to the Addam’s Family theme song filled the brunet’s small bedroom, and he smiled unconsciously.

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“Why are you awake?” Casey could hear rustling, most likely Adam shifting around in his bunk, and then a soft sigh.

“I woke up, and my Casey-senses were tingling. Why are you awake?” The blond’s voice was low as he woke up entirely, and it made something warm blossom in the healer’s chest.

“Nightmare,” was his reply. Adam didn’t need another one.

“Which one? Was it the grave one or the one with all the snow?”

“Red eyes,” Casey said softly, closing his eyes as the howling echoed throughout his head. “All I could see was blood-red eyes, but it was so loud. I could hear dogs and what sounded like metal hitting metal.” Adam hummed across the line.

“Was it like a hammer hitting steel or knives on a sharpening block?”

“Uh, more like swords. It wasn’t dark, but nothing was in focus except for the eyes. I could make out a vague figure, almost like a wolf but on two legs.”

“So, a wolf-man who also swordfights?” Casey huffed and snubbed out the butt of his cigarette.

“I know, I know, it sounds fuckin’ crazy, but it’s my crazy. I don’t know why this is what I dream about, but it’s gotta mean something.” The healer resisted the urge to light another cigarette and instead tapped his fingers rapidly against his thigh.

“I don’t know; dreams aren’t an exact science, after all. Unrelated, what are you gonna tell Percy?” Adam inquired from his end.

“I have no idea. I don’t wanna be his boyfriend, but I can’t help but think he’d be a nice friend,” the brunet muttered. “I have you, and you’ve always been more than enough, but…”

“But what if there was another one, a third musketeer if you will.” Adam finished quietly. “I get what you’re sayin’, Case, just tell me who you want, and I’ll make it happen.” He smiled to himself at the genius’s words. That’s Adam, always willing to do anything for Casey.

“There’s no one right now, but I like to think Percy could be an option.” The blond inhaled but said nothing, Casey’s brow furrowing. “Unless you don’t like him.” In the end, your opinion will trump everything as it always has.

“I...have no opinion.” He obviously did, but the healer kept his mouth shut. “It doesn’t help that we don’t like anyone else, huh?”

“Yeah, it’d be easier if I was more approachable. That might have something to do with it,” Casey joked, though it wasn’t entirely in jest. He always assumed that their lack of friends was from his personality more than Adam’s.

“We just haven’t found anyone worth the time yet, dude.” That wasn’t technically true. It was more like they didn’t try to find anyone worth their time. “Do you ever regret not making more friends? Don’t you get lonely when I’m not around?” Casey thought about that for a moment, the only sound being Adam’s steady breathing and the soft music from the brunet’s speakers.

“I guess I do get lonely,” Casey admitted, “but in the end, I learned that one of you was more than enough for me, Adam. You’re my best friend, after all.” Neither boy had to point out that the blond was his only friend.

“I just think you should have more friends, ya know, so more people can appreciate you.” Warmth blossomed in the brunet’s chest, but it was replaced with resignation when his alarm began to beep incessantly. “Is that your alarm?”

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“Yeah, it’s to tell me when to get dressed in case I lose track of time. It’s a little after seven, so you might wanna get ready too, but you know, Cada loco con su tema.” The rustling paused.

“What?” Casey rolled his eyes but acknowledged that Adam probably wasn’t far into his Spanish lessons.

“Cada loco con su tema, basically means everyone has their own way of doin’ things,” he explained.

“What’s the literal translation because I know that’s not it? You’ve taught me that much, at least.” Casey smiled slightly at that, pleased.

“Literally means every crazy person with their issue.”

There was silence and then Adam’s exasperated voice. “How the hell do you get your version from that? It makes no sense!”

Chuckling, Casey said, “Sure it does. You’re just mad you don’t understand something for once.”

“Haha, you’re so funny. I’ll see you in twenty, asshole.” Adam didn’t say goodbye; he never did, but the line disconnected, and Casey was alone once more. He felt better about talking to Percy but wasn’t sure if he still wanted to be the boy’s friend. If Adam had reservations, then so did he. He’s never steered me wrong before, so I’ll trust his judgment until he does.

Setting his phone to the side, Casey slid from the bed and stepped into his boots with practiced ease. The healer locked up the house and started walking, with his earbuds in and another cigarette between his teeth. The music was loud and the air brisk as he strolled down the street, perfect August weather.

Casey made it to the school and entered the gymnasium, where he met Mrs. Hale’s cerulean eyes. She smiled at him as he passed, and Casey nodded back in greeting. As he sat at the top of the bleachers, the healer subtly studied his English teacher. Mrs. Hale and her brother set off his warning system, but he still didn’t know why. She seemed like a kind woman; hell, she definitely gave off Ms. Honey vibes, but something about her screamed ‘danger’. Mrs. Hale confused Casey more than her brother because the pain she brought was sharper in its intensity, but he set that issue aside for later.

“Good morning, Casey.” The healer looked away from his subject of interest and found Percy grinning down at him with a red can in hand.

“Morning, thank you.” He tucked the can into his backpack as the New Kid sat beside him and bit his lip. “Tuesday was fun, but I think we’re better off as friends.” Percy’s smile fell, and his eyes flashed ruby-red for a split-second, long enough for a spike of pain to flare up behind his eyes, but then nodded.

“I’ll try and change your mind someday, I guess.” The sentence was questionable, not quite what Casey had expected from the New Kid, but he chose not to comment. Maybe Adam’s right about him. “I’ll see you in science, Casey.” The healer watched Percy leave but was thankfully distracted by a flurry of blond hair.

“Here, asshole.” A Red Bull was pressed into his hand as Adam plopped down beside him, and he huffed quietly. Casey popped the tab and took a generous sip before turning to look at the blond. Their hands were barely a millimeter apart on the hard plastic seats, and Casey absently wondered what Adam would do if he closed the distance. In a completely platonic manner, of course.

“Hey, what are you thinking so hard about?” The blond interrupted his thoughts, thankfully, and the healer looked up into viridescent eyes.

“I told Percy I just wanted to be friends.” Adam’s gaze narrowed almost imperceptibly, and he scooted closer until his knee bumped against Casey’s.

“Did he do or say something?” The protective tone wasn’t lost on the brunet, but he chalked it up to being friends for nearly five years.

“No, he was fine, don’t worry,” Casey shrugged. “I’m sure I could handle him anyways.” He remained skeptical.

“I don’t trust him,” Adam stated simply, “because like you said, no one is that perfect.” A startling clap drew their attention to the bottom of the bleachers. Mr. Hale smiled broadly below them and ran a hand through his artfully-tousled curls.

“Good morning, everyone. I want to let you guys know that the football team still needs three more players to continue being eligible this season. If anyone is interested, please come see me at some point during the day. Thank you,” with that, the conversation resumed around the boys. Adam leaned into the healer gently and smirked.

“You should try out.” Casey scoffed and took another slow sip of the energy drink as he met Adam’s eyes.

“No way in hell.”

~_~.~_~

“I still think you should try out for the team.” Casey groaned as he slid into their booth. Since Adam’s initial comment, the healer had thought about it, and he wanted to try out. The thing was, biological females have never played for the Ashbrooke Devils, and Casey wasn’t about to be the first. The dysphoria had worsened after that thought, and he kept his jacket buttoned from then on.

“Why are you still on this?”

“I just think that it’d be cool if you were the jock-boyfriend, instead of dating the jock, ya know?” Casey didn’t know. Nothing about being a jock appealed to him aside from the letterman jacket.

“Girls don’t play football,” he remarked caustically. When his partner-in-crime didn’t respond, Casey glanced up from his phone to find the blond glaring at him.

“It’s a damn good thing you aren’t a girl then, huh?” His accent was more pronounced from his annoyance, and it made him smile a bit. Adam did have a lovely accent. “Eat.” With that, the blond slid a neatly wrapped sandwich toward Casey.

“What’s on the menu?” The healer inquired before removing the paper, eyebrows raised.

“Chicken salad,” Adam replied, “and yes, without grapes or cranberries, ya freak.” The boys shared a smile, and the conversation paused as they ate. Casey avoided turning around so he wouldn’t accidentally catch Percy’s gaze, so instead, he focused on his best friend. Yesterday, when handing Adam his books after Wes knocked them to the ground, Casey had looked at the blond and felt something unfamiliar.

Adam hadn’t been his best friend of five years at that moment. Instead, it was like they had never seen each other so clearly before. They were alone, the world around them melting away. Then, it all came rushing back. Casey hadn’t understood the strange feeling blossoming in his chest, and he still doesn’t but hoped that it didn’t return. It was weird.

“So, are you and the New Kid friends or what?” Adam asked around a mouthful of grapes.

“I guess?” Casey wasn’t too sure, not with Percy’s comment but preferred to assume they were.

“Oh-kay, back to football then. I think it’d be a bad idea to play in your binder, so maybe don’t try out.” Casey rolled his eyes as he balled up his trash and resisted the urge to smile.

“You’ve convinced me, I won’t,” he deadpanned. Adam mimicked his eye roll and kicked his boot.

“You’re such a little bitch.”

“Yeah, but you chose me, so now you gotta deal with me.” The blond softened and then sighed as if realizing something.

“I did, didn’t I?” Yeah, and I chose you too, dumbass.

Percy’s POV

It was strange to attend school when you had already graduated a handful of times in numerous states. It was stranger to be rejected by a boy who had no chance with anyone else, Percy thought as he left Alpha Hale’s classroom. He had tried not to make his displeasure too obvious, but he must have failed because Casey had been avoiding eye contact since this morning. It was okay, though. The future Guardian would be his in the end, no matter how Percy had to obtain him.

“Hey, Perseus, here to sign up for the team?” The boy saw Beta Hale walking toward him and tilted his chin upward.

“I am.” Christian Hale smiled at him, almost boyish, and tucked his hands into the pockets of his khakis as he matched Percy’s stride.

“You’ll be careful, right? I’d hate to have to move again because some kid broke something trying to tackle you,” Beta Hale joked, though Percy frowned in return.

“I have more control than a pup, thank you. I’ll be fine.” The implication that he wasn’t in total control of himself grated on the teen’s nerves. The teacher’s smile dulled slightly.

“I meant nothing by it, Perseus.” Beta Hale made no move to converse further as they stepped onto the turf field, which was just fine with Percy. The Omega joined the other two students standing away from the team members and plastered on his most disarming smile. The other players would look over occasionally as they passed footballs back and forth. Still, a sharp bark from the other two coaches always got their attention.

“Alright, you three, thanks for signing up. As this is a middle school team, this isn’t a tryout, but more of a placement test,” Beta Hale explained. “We’re just going to try a few different things to see where you guys would fit best as reserves, alright?” Percy wasn’t a reserve by any means, but he could sacrifice his pride in the long run.

The three boys were given pads to wear over their shirts during practice and then taken to the opposite end of the field where Coach Sanders waited. “First up, catching. The three positions open are right tackle, running back, and safety. Tanner, you’re up first.” Mark Tanner was shorter than Percy but bulkier, making a better lineman than running back.

Mark caught three out of five passes, mainly due to his lack of speed, and Sanders made notes on his little clipboard with a frown. “Schuyler, ten-yard line.” Percy tightened his shoelaces once more before jogging down to the left side of the line. With his reflexes, he caught each pass that Sanders threw. The teen wasn’t even sweating yet.

The third, Tyler Jameson, was an almost 6’4” seventh-grader who looked as if he should be playing basketball instead. He caught all five passes as well, which seemed to please the coach.

“Okay, Tanner, I think you’d do best at tackle. Go join defense.” The other boy jogged off, and Sanders turned to them. “Schuyler, Jameson. You two have good hands on you, so you’ll be competing for running back. Anderson!” Percy frowned at the blond teen approaching them. From what he’d gathered, Wes Anderson loathed his Casey and made it a point to remind him of that.

“Yes, coach?”

“You’ll be passing to these two here, so you’ll have to watch where they run.” Wes nodded like an obedient dog and took his place at the 20-yard line. “You two will start on either side of him and run any direction you want, but watch for the ball.” Percy took the left side while Tyler took the right, and then they were running. The Omega could easily outrun the human, but he remained at a human pace and still came out on top. Tyler fumbled one pass when he slammed into Percy, which sent both of them to the ground.

Percy helped the human up, mindful of his strength when pulling, and smiled. “Schuyler, you’ll be our reserve running back if Thompson is unable to play. Tyler, you’re our safety reserve. Practice is after school till five every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.” Sanders explained shortly, “and our next game is Thursday, so you both will be working harder to learn the necessary plays in case we need you. Now, join the others.” Percy headed for the offense line and switched out every so often with Mackenzie Thompson, a small sixth grader who could outrun anyone they put him up against.

Percy made sure to drop the ball a few times or not be fast enough, and each time Beta Hale would nod approvingly. Not that I need that lowly Beta’s approval. The three newcomers stayed late, long after the others left to receive their equipment. By the time Percy dips into an alleyway to zap home, it’s nearly six. Sweat dripped down his neck as the elevator rose to the top floor, his t-shirt clinging to his skin. The Omega’s eyes immediately found his brother, Charles Schuyler, reading in his favorite leather armchair.

“You’re home late, Perseus.”

“I went to football practice.” Charlie looked up sharply from the tome in his hands, and his dark eyes flashed scarlet.

“Whatever for?” Percy flopped onto the couch and dropped his equipment bag onto the ground beside him.

“A stepping stone in my plan to get my Guardian. He admitted to wanting an athletic boyfriend, so this is how I woo him,” Percy beamed. The teen was assured that he would have Casey. Charlie slowly shut the book and fixed the Omega with his steady gaze.

“If your date didn’t go well, then why do you continue to pursue him? You cannot force his affection, Perseus.” His smile grew cold, and he felt a low rumbling build in his chest.

“He doesn’t know what he wants yet. I can help him achieve his full potential after all,” the boy stated. “I know what’s best for him.” His brother huffed and pressed his fingertips to his temple.

“You are playing with fire, brother. Guardians do not exist, and I’m not sure what it will take for you to understand,” Charlie stressed, “but you need to. You can’t use that poor human for your delusions, Perseus, it isn’t right.” The teen growled low in his throat and leaped to his feet, though his Beta-brother remained seated.

“They are real, Charlie. And Casey is one, I can feel it!” Percy hissed, his eyes bleeding red as he spoke. He angrily paced across the rug, shoulders hunched and claws pressed to his palms until they bled from the force. “I never asked for your approval on this matter anyhow.”

“No, but if the Council hears of you harassing a human, then they will bring the wrath of the divine down on all of us,” Charlie replied calmly. His hands were clasped across his lap as if he weren’t staring down an aggravated Omega. “Is that what you want? To have us tried and thrown into The Well?” Percy’s irritation boiled down to a low simmer at those words, but it still coiled low in his stomach like a snake waiting to strike.

“I will have my mate back; I will have Casey.” I’ll have him even if I have to sacrifice your freedom to do so, brother.

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