I stared at my partner as my throbbing migraine tried to evolve to the next level. My suit finished its 12th diagnostic and my armor was clean and clear.

"Dammit Brian, what did I say about romancing the alien!?" I screamed at the idiot. He stared back sheepishly.

The mission was simple. Touch down, and do a meet and greet with the locals and wait for the cargo to be brought to the transport. Load it up and then go home.

Standard cargo procedures.

Except for this time, I got Brian as a partner. Dammit, Brian.

I now fully understood Brian Pay. Bonus hours for dealing with the man. Well, man child since he was mentally in his teens.

Brian had a weakness for new and diverse inter-species sex. He loved the novelty of it, and the no strings attached since we rarely hit the same planet twice. Sure the company returned, but a rotating guard had us travel all across the universe.

The more experience you had, the more likely you were in hostile zones. The more hostile zones, the better the pay and perks.

I watched Brian fiddle with the tentacle quivering out of his shoulder. Out of his reinforced, plasteel composite armor. The thing could withstand heavy punishment this tentacle was poking out of it.

My diagnostic system touched his and the results hurt me. His entire left torso was infected!

"I told you the Gallsarian chick was trouble!" I ranted again as Brian shook hands with his new hand.

"Hah... You think the captain is going to notice?" Brian hedged as his eyes met mine. I sighed.

"Brian. Half of your face is puke green and that tentacle has poked through your uniform!" I grimaced as the thing stopped and then waived at me.

Screw it. I waved back.

"Yeah, so is that a maybe?"

"You know what Brian? Maybe your right. Everything is going to be ok," I relented and Brian smiled at me. If the man wasn't related to the CEO, I am sure no one would have said a word if I shot him.

I was in for a tough exam, but I took solace in the single fact that Brian was going to get skinned alive by the Captain, the Quarter Master, the Doctor, and the Chief of Storage.

I never understood why I had a special program installed in my communication system. The 'Brian Special' they called it. Sent an alert straight to command and even processed the paperwork it would all generate. All you had to do was fill in a few blanks after you got aboard.

I sent the 'Brian Special' up and tried to ignore the idiot. He giggled as he poked his new tentacle again. Wait... why are there two wiggling things from the hole...

Dammit, Brian!