I knew now what it meant to have fire flowing through my veins. To experience the feeling of every cell of my body burning and dying. At least, if felt like dying.

The death before was nothing in the face of this. This was torture that felt eternal. I would have nightmares about this, if I lived to survive it. Dr. Rossi was a blurry shape, backing away from me as I fell onto the bed. Everything was red, and my eyes felt like I was staring into the sun.

Perhaps it was easier to give into the pain. I no longer flinched every time it felt like a lightning bolt had landed onto one of my nerve endings. I let the pain enter every crevice of my body, thinking it might alleviate my suffering if I accepted it. I was an idiot.

Instead of accepting the pain, I focused on the small piece of the sky that I could see, looking straight up. The sky was violet now, through the scarlet haze of my vision, the clouds shades of pale lavender.

I heard Ma’ voice through the fever. The memory of her pressing cold cloths to my forehead when I was a child hung around me. The memories at least, offered some respite.

The youth I had made the deal with appeared in front of me. It only confirmed my fears that I was dying.

“You’re not dying, Ravi,” he said. “We would not let a valuable asset go so easily. You know what the humans say. What does not kill you…”

Leaves you weak and broken, I thought. I didn’t have the energy to say anything out loud.

“It will make you stronger, Ravi.”

I nodded my head. It wasn’t just a pain to speak, but to listen as well. Perhaps if I agreed with everything he said, he would leave and I could be in peace. It was an effort to focus. I could use that effort instead to look at the setting sky.

“Rest now,” he said. I felt a wet cloth against my forehead, and I sighed in relief. I nodded again, and he vaporized, his body melting into the colors of the sunset. Was that possible? I was tired to think of what was logical.

All this could just be my mind creating havoc upon my senses. I could be going mad instead of dying. I could be dead already and not know it. It got easier as time passed. My limbs felt like stone, but my head slowly grew clearer. I counted the stars in the sky to pass the time, and the mindless activity lulled me into sleep.

When I woke up, I felt alive again. Painfully alive. My limbs moved to my command, but unwillingly, each inch of movement like pulling teeth. I sat up and found a tray of food and a bottle of water on the floor in front of the bed.

A post-it was stuck to the corner of the tray.

Take the pills after having breakfast, the note said.

A paper cup held a few pills in various sizes and colors, and I downed them with a gulp of orange juice. It stung. I hadn’t noticed that my throat was sore and dry.

I checked my phone for the first time in the day, and saw dozens of messages and missed calls. I hadn’t heard even one of the calls. Taking a bite of the french toast, I looked through the messages.

Congratulations!

Here’s hoping it didn’t kill you.

The most calls were from Ma, and I called her back first.

“Why didn’t you pick up my call?” she asked. “I called the hospital and they said you were fine, but they wouldn’t put you on the line.”

I rubbed my forehead. “Dr. Rossi put me on some new medicine to help me sleep. It knocked me out. The nurses probably didn’t want to wake me up.”

“You were having problems sleeping?”

“A little,” I lied. Sleep in this time and age was a complete luxury. I was used to sleeping in the open most days. It would be a while before I took the comfort of a soft bed and the invention of air conditioning for granted. Each time I slept like a baby. Sometimes I worried I wasn’t aware enough of my surroundings.

“Can you make yourself some warm milk at night?” she asked.

“Hmm. I’ll do that.”

“With turmeric,” she added. “Your voice sounds weak.”

“With turmeric,” I agreed.

“Alright, I’ll call after you’ve had lunch,” she said.

“Okay, Ma.”

I cut the call before she could remind me to add more herbs or spices to the milk I wouldn’t drink. I was still tired. I still shivered from fever, and I was weak despite the breakfast.

The other messages were short. Lina wanted me to come to the cafeteria when I could. Louis called dibs on being the first one to fight with me after I recovered. I massaged my arms. If I recovered. The pain had dulled, but I didn’t think I could ever escape the memory of it.

The metal door opened, and Dr. Rossi walked in.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m alive,” I said.

She chuckled. A nurse followed her in and started to take my vitals.

“You’ve still got a temperature,” the nurse said.

“Is it over?” I asked. “Can I go back to my room now?”

I sounded like a petulant child, I knew. But the thought of going back to my own room, where Lina and the others could visit already made me feel better. I could look outside my window or sit in the park.

“I’m here to give you the second dose.”