Chapter 33: Chug Jug with you

Current Location: ???

Of course, there was also the customary row of land-stitches separating the biomes, but Brent’s attention had been first drawn to the house, and the new landscape.

It was a little funny that he’d gotten used to the sight of these giant metal tubes going in and out of the ground so quickly, and now it was almost normal. Though to be fair, they just sat there and didn’t pose any immediate threat so they were easy to overlook.

As they walked past the stitches, Brent looked at the metal. It had some grime on it from dirt but some parts were still shiny enough that he could see a bit of his reflection. How recently had they been put there? Had this whole island been stitched together just for the purpose of this contest?

The building was a one story boathouse in a natural looking brown wood laminate color, with a small dock extending out from it into the river.

There was a door in the side, left slightly ajar to indicate someone had been there.

“Uh, we might have company,” Brent whispered, pointing it out.

“Might be. Up for a little force recon, kid?” Ray asked, and Brent nodded.

“Alright, we’re going in. Everyone else keep your eyes peeled.” Ray drew his rifle, and Brent followed suit with his own as they adopted a more slow and stealthy approach.

Weapon Mk12 SPR (20/20)

Hopefully their presence hadn’t already been detected by anyone inside, or this would all be rather pointless. The two of them crept up to the house with the others following at a distance.

Ray motioned to Brent. “I’ll take point. Get the door on 3.”

Get the door? Ah, he meant he’d go in first.

Brent nodded, and Ray held up a finger. Then two.

On three Brent pushed, and the door swung open. Ray rushed in, and Brent noticed that him opening the door allowed Ray to enter without pausing or taking a hand off his gun. Smart.

Ray quickly pivoted to the left and then the right. “Clear,” he said in a muted tone.

Brent took that as his cue to enter the boathouse, which was indeed empty of people or anything moving.

The interior was a single large space, and perhaps interior was a misnomer as there was a wide and tall arched opening on the side facing the river, allowing them a view of the far bank.

The space had the same natural seeming brown paint job. The center was taken up by a large rectangular pool, a bay presumably sized for a motorboat that joined the waterway. There was no boat in it, though.

Along the walls was some wooden boxes, a couple of beach chairs, and… a checkout machine.

Finally, another buy station! Brent almost cheered.

The rest of the gang was still waiting outside, so he ushered them in.

Karisma came through last, and closed the door behind them. Brent could feel the tension leave the room as everyone relaxed and lowered their weapons. They had reached a safe house of sorts.

“Finally, some real chairs,” Harry exclaimed, plopping himself down in one and causing it to creak from his weight. “Feels like it’s been ages since we last saw one.”

That would have been yesterday, when they were in the Confounding Cul-De-Sac. But that did feel like it was ages ago, and sitting on rough logs and such since then had done no favors for Brent’s butt.

“So this is that shop thing you were talking about?” Ray said. “Looks just like-”

“A self checkout machine, yeah.” Brent finished. “Part of this place’s sense of humor.”

This was perfect. It was inside a building too, so there was no chance of getting sniped while shopping. Well, maybe from the riverside entrance. The far banks seemed high up enough to block line of sight from anything beyond it, but consequently prevented him from seeing if anyone was approaching from that direction. He really wanted to just board that side up but there was nothing large enough available.

Well, they had six pairs of eyes. He’d just have to hope at least one of them would be looking if or when someone came that way, or else they would be in trouble.

He walked up to the machine and sure enough it lit up with the blue and white shop interface and “D-bucks inserted” counter.

D-Bucks: $6873

He had a lot of those now, but was still going figure out what he wanted before putting any in.

He could get a better gun. All of the powerful ones were now within his price range. But he’d just switched to that Mk12 rifle, so wouldn’t that make all his previous thinking for nothing?

Ah, he could get a bigger backpack and make this a non-issue. He scrolled to the “Back Bling” section, and found not one but multiple level 3 Backpacks, differentiated by their physical appearance or skin. There was “The Crystal Method” from before, as well a few military camouflaged ones resembling the one Karisma had.

Funnily enough they were not all the same price, so there was clearly some value attributed to the pack’s skin. Brent settled on one called the “Handy Haversack” as unlike the others it had more of a fantasy theme to it.

Upgrading his armor was another no-brainer. Brent took off his current set, the police vest that he’d found back at the research station.

Armor - Level 1

Rarity Uncommon Durability 40% Reduces incoming weapon damage by 20%

Yup, he definitely needed an upgrade. Even without checking the durability statistic the vest looked really beat up and worn.

Unfortunately there just didn’t seem to be any option to sell or trade-in items from his Inventory. That might have made lugging around some of those useless pieces actually worth it.

The level 3 Armors looked to be starting around $900. There were some really flashy ones with logos and such, but Brent avoided them and went with a plainer military style one.

Armor - Level 3

Category

Armor

Rarity Rare

Reduces incoming weapon damage by 60%

Price

$915

Units to Purchase

-

1

+

It felt kind of weird to just be skipping over level 2 right for the best gear now as it didn’t feel like the endgame yet. But as he constantly reminded himself, this wasn’t an MMO. If he died he wouldn’t make it to the end.

What else was there… he added some green and blue ammo boxes to the cart.

He became conscious of being watched. Some of the others were looking at him, and Ray was directly behind him. Right, maybe they wanted a turn too.

He could always get more stuff later, so he decided to check out now.

Items

5.56 ammo (30)

7.62 ammo (30)

Backpack (Level 3)

Armor (Level 3)

Your total is: $1350. Insert cash or select payment type.

Brent started inserting bills into the slot, and with dawning horror remembered that he had all ones. He’d inserted 2, and there were 1348 more to go.

This was going to take a while.

--break--

Never let it be said that human ingenuity could solve any mundane problem given enough heads put together.

That said, why the hell did the prize money have to come in one dollar bills?

By now the constant hum of the machine eating up bills had become a constant companion to Brent. He sat at its base, constantly feeding it money from his pack.

It turned out the machine would accept bills regardless of whether it was in a checkout state or not, so for the sake of efficiency they had decided to have one person be putting their bills into the slot non-stop while the others simultaneously browsed the shop interface.

Everyone would add their items to the same cart and they’d just order everything in one big go. It was unclear who exactly the stuff would be delivered to, but that was a problem for Dombey to figure out. In any case, as Brent had already “finished” his shopping he had been volunteered to take on the dubious duty of dedicated bill feeder.

There was a silver lining, though: while he was at the machine he could peep at what the others were looking at by craning his neck up a little.

Ray was up first, and he selected much of the same items as Brent at first: Level 3 backpack, armor, ammunition, as well as a level 3 helmet and some grenades.

“Oh, I forgot to get that, can you put one in for me too?” Brent asked.

“You know what, I’ll get a full suit for everyone.” Ray hit the plus button to increase the quantity on all the level 3 gear. “We’ve got at least 10 grand between us, it shouldn’t be a problem.”

The slot had a bit of give to it so maybe it could accept multiple bills at once. Brent tried putting two in together. If he was wrong and it took both while only counting one he’d only be out a dollar, or D-buck as it was called.

To his delight, the machine detected it and the counter ticked up by two. A stack of three was also detected and accepted properly, so Brent began steadily incrementing the stack size one by one to test what the limit was. It turned out to be twenty, close to the physical width of the slot, and when he tried putting in more it just spat them out again, so there was no real loss.

This greatly cut down on the total time it would take, but the fact that it had to be done this way was still very annoying. Why couldn’t it just directly deduct from his Inventory?

Ray also bought another weapon, the M4A2, along with several attachments.

“It’s the official service rifle,” he explained, “There might be better ones, but this is what I’m used to.”

“There are many like it, but this one is mine,” Harry suddenly announced in a strange voice.

“Huh?”

“It sort of sounded similar to that line, eh? What you said.” Harry pouted at the lack of comprehension from everyone. “Ah damn, none of you guys have seen that movie.”

“Uh, okay then. You want to take your turn now, Holmes?” Ray offered. “I can take over the bill stuff.”

“Yes, please.” Brent was so done with feeding the machine by now. His hands felt really dry and grubby.

“Alright then.” Harry stepped up, rubbing his hands. “Hm, what should I even get? Maybe the biggest, baddest shotgun out there…”

Now freed from his duties, Brent decided to keep watch on the entrances to the boathouse. He shifted a chair over to a good position and sat down, also eliciting a creak.

Man, the furniture here was really run down. He’d have to watch out lest he get tetanus.

Soon enough Harry was done getting… whatever he was getting. Karisma went next and she ordered… food and medical supplies. And a can opener, even.

Ugh. Brent felt really dumb for not thinking about getting such essential items. There was no telling how long they’d have to survive out here. Then again, the other guys hadn’t thought about it either.

“Wow, what is this ‘Chug Jug’ thing?” Karisma asked. “It’s the most expensive healing item…”

Brent managed to tear himself away from guard duty to take a look.

Chug Jug

Category

Consumable (Healing, Adrenaline)

Rarity Super Special Rare

Uses

2/2

Heals all HP and increases Adrenaline by 100%.

For that #1 Victory Royale. There’s enough to share with a friend, but why would you?

Price

$420

Units to Purchase

-

0

+

It was almost the equivalent of a Panacea or Full heal potion in Eternity Online, except there was no mana to fill here.

“Hey, that’s pretty good! Get a bunch of those,” Brent said.

“This feels like some sort of joke I’m not getting,” Ray remarked.

“Story of my life,” Karisma said, “Or at least my time here. I’ll get three.“

Harry tagged out Ray for the dedicated bill feeder position, and soon enough Karisma finished her shopping.

Reisa and Cassie stepped up to the machine, although it was more out of simple curiosity than actually wanting to get anything. Brent was a bit surprised in the case of the latter.

“You’ve never seen one of these before?” he asked.

“Uh… no?” Cassie probed the touchscreen hesitantly.

Huh. Maybe the world she came from wasn’t so modern after all.

Wait, no. He was not going to put the self checkout machine of all things on a pedestal as the pinnacle of modern human technology. That would be stupid.

“So these machines are common in your world?” Reisa remarked. “Interesting. How does one use them?”

“To be honest, you’re better off not,” Brent replied. Not until they made the damn things less annoying.

“Oh, it’s actually really easy,” Karisma cut in, “Here, let me show you how it works.”

She started explaining the concepts of buttons and pointers, then took the elf’s hand and guided it along the screen. Reisa’s face lit up in childlike awe as it responded to her touch.

Brent frowned at the sight, sensing he had missed out on a certain opportunity.

“Oi, I’m about to run out of money here,” Harry declared, “Someone mind spotting me their cash?”

Brent looked at Ray, who stared right back.

“Yeah, I’ve got you,” Brent sighed.

--break--

It took quite a bit of time to finish loading all of their cash into the buy station and completing the transaction, but they had all agreed it was time well spent. If they were going to be attacking Adrian Donis’ group they needed to have the best gear they could get.

The man hadn’t recognized their group as a serious threat to him yet, Brent figured, as he was just sending single thralls their way rather than coming at them full force. So they still had some element of surprise.

“So, where are we headed now?” Karisma asked.

“I’m guessing Donis came here as well,” Harry said, “There was probably a boat in the bay here, so he must have taken it and gone down the river.”

“I really hope that isn’t the case,” Brent said, “Because if it is we’ll never be able to catch up on foot.”

“Why not?” Reisa asked, kneeling down by the water. “The water isn’t moving, and there’s been precious little wind.”

“Yeah, you’re assuming it was a motorboat,” Karisma pointed out, “It could have been like, a sailboat. Or a rowboat. Or uh, one of those paddle boats with the cute ducky design!” She made a sort of cycling motion with her hands.

“I don’t think so. Not with our luck,” Brent said darkly. Well, the ducky boat might not be too far fetched given Dombey’s sense of humor.

“I don’t know,” Ray cut in, “I think we’re pretty lucky considering none of you guys have died yet.”

“And now that you’ve said it, somebody will,” Cassie said, beating Brent and Karisma to the punch by a matter of seconds.

Ray chuckled. “Probably. But it won’t be because of anything I said.”

“Anyway, we’ll just follow the river down to where Donis’ gang is, or where they got off,” Harry said.

“What if there was no boat?” Brent asked.

“Then uh, the river would still limit their movements to either right or left. It’s a pretty wide and deep one, so they wouldn’t have crossed it.”

“Not here, at least,” Reisa confirmed.

Indeed, there would be signs on the far banks of a group emerging from the river like wet patches or trampled grass, and none were present that Brent could see.

From both a visual inspection and looking at the Map, any further southward progress would have to be to the right.

A buzzing sound filled the air, recognized as the whirring of rotors.

Brent looked up from the Map. Well, up was not accurate, as the display was already at eye level, but away. “That must be the drones with all our stuff.”

“Oh boy, this I gotta see,” Harry went for the door. “How many do you think there are this time?”

“Don’t go too far out,” Brent warned, “And keep your guard up, we don’t want a repeat of last time.” Least of all him.

“You got it, mate.” Harry had his shotgun pistol at the ready, and merely opened the door a crack to peer out.

Brent had the momentary fear that Harry’d start getting shot somehow as soon as he opened the door, and then again as he swung it open wider, but this did not come to pass.

“Holy s- ” Harry began to exclaim, but caught himself. “Woop, sorry about that. There are a hell of a lot of them though.”

As the buzzing sound grew louder Harry stepped aside to allow the veritable fleet of drones through the doorway, but instead they looped around and came in through the riverside boat bay. It made sense as it was wider and less likely to be occupied by something.

It was a glorious display. The drones came two by two in an orderly formation, carrying all sizes of packages. Brent could almost hear the orchestral underscore accompanying their entrance.

The first drones descended and approached… Reisa, of all people. Brent had been wondering who the stuff would be delivered to as they’d all been involved in the shopping, but apparently it was the last person who had used the machine.

There was some slight concern that they might drop their precious payload into the water due to overcrowding, but this was quickly absolved.

The drones over water merely waited their turn, hovering in the air until the pair before them had finished depositing their cargo in front of the fascinated elf and flown away.

The packages quickly started to pile up, some of them had the shape of the small black cases from before, but others had a more… primitive look to them: rough squares of brown paper bound in twine.

That was interesting. Perhaps they had ordered so much stuff that the game organizers had run out of cases, a flaw exposed in the facade of this artificial world.

Ah, but the pile was getting dangerously high, to the point where some of the containers might slip and fall into the water. Brent snapped out of his trance to start pulling some of them aside, and the others followed suit.

At last the drones finished delivering their packages, and exited the boat house in the same way they came in.

It took another minute or so for the buzzing to fade away, leaving the six of them standing silent amidst their bounty.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Brent said, and began opening up a case.

It was Christmas time, battle royale edition.