Nero flipped his tail and darted out over the reef. He was swimming low enough to the ground that he could trail his fingers through the sand, and every lash of his fin stirred up more silt. He was pacing, and he knew he should not be doing so over the sandy stretch where his pod tended to sleep. It was never fun to get grains of sand lodged in one’s gills, so purposefully stirring the water was frowned upon, but he could not slow the instinctive motion agitation was spurring him into.

He knew he should leave, find a quieter place on the other side of the reef where he was less likely to disturb anyone. The last thing he wanted right now was to endure a scolding lecture or a feelings talk. He twisted and began to swim in the opposite direction without paying much attention to where he was going.

His parents had been distant lately. It was not so much that he was cross or lonely or feeling neglected. Quite the opposite most of the time. At twelve years old, he was caught in between the ages where he was treated as a helpless youth or respected as a competent adolescent. He had been going with the hunting parties for the better part of two seasons, and they were finally allowing him to properly join in. Next hunt was meant to be his to lead, but he had passed on the opportunity to go on the last one.

Nero was startled from his thoughts by a sharp tug on his dorsal. It jerked him to a stop, and he growled. He hated when people grabbed it. It had grown from his back last cycle and was still incredibly tender. His mother told him it would firm up more as he grew and bother him less, but for now he was very sensitive about having it prodded.

“Stop that unruly noise, Nero,” his Aunt Iliene’s command was laced with stern disapproval.

He glanced up at her and rolled his shoulders in an attempt to dislodge her hand. “That hurts, Aunt Iliene,” he protested.

“It should,” she scoffed in response. Her pale pink fins smacked against his tail as she lashed them. “Perhaps then you would learn to listen. You know you are not allowed to stray from the reef, where did you think you were going?” she scolded. Her piercing dark blue eyes were full of disappointment and it made Nero bristle.

He shook his head and gazed out beyond her. He was nearly at the edge of the shelf. “I-I did not realize,” he admitted.

For a moment, his aunt’s features remained stern. Her short blonde hair was waving around her face and she took a moment to tuck it back off her face. Then her features softened slightly. She released her grip on his fin and smoothed his hair back. “Nero, I know the last quarter moon has not been easy for you; it has been frightening for all of us, but you cannot simply pace around stirring up the silt and wandering around lost in your head.”

Nero’s tail lashed and he hissed in frustration. None of them understood.

His aunt clucked her tongue and grabbed his shoulder firmly. She pulled until Nero lost his balance and plopped down into the sand. He was about to protest before she sunk down beside him.

Nero reluctantly curled his tail. He did not want to endure a feelings talk like the one he knew was coming, but he also had no real excuse to leave and doubted Aunt Iliene would allow him to regardless. He did not like talking about his emotions. He barely understood them himself without fumbling trying to explain them to someone else who inevitably would not understand. Nero preferred being by himself. He did not speak often or much, company made him uncomfortable, and conversation was more exhausting than hefting rocks all day.

“Have you talked much with your mother and father?” Aunt Iliene inquired.

Nero shook his tail and pulled his tail up close to his torso. He had not wished to disturb them anymore than necessary. He had been so excited at first, when they had told him. They were having a baby, and he was going to be a big brother. He was never very good with others, but his mother and father had seemed so overjoyed and so certain that he was going to be good at being a big brother that he had wanted to try. But things had gone wrong so quickly. His mother’s maternity fins had grown slowly and stunted, and she had fallen ill even as her belly rounded. As time stretched on and his mother got sicker and sicker, Nero had been convinced that she was going to die.

He had begun to loathe the creature growing inside of her. He was not sure how it could possibly be a baby if it was so cruel as to take his mother from him. While his father had fretted over her, Nero had grown to loathe the feelings festering inside of him. He despised how frightened and helpless he felt, that there was nothing he could do to help her. All the negativity had rotted into a hatred for the baby. It was not a fair trade.

Everything had gotten so much worse when it was born. Two moons too early. His mother had been in so much pain. He had swum to the edge of the reef to escape it and still it had haunted his ears. He had never understood how this could happen to a healer. His mother always seemed to know everything, from drawing the poisons from a red stripe fish sting, or soothing the burns of a jellyfish tentacle. He had believed there was nothing she could not fix, so why could she not protect herself from a parasitic pregnancy?

The water had tasted of blood around her afterwards, and despite all the complications, she was still fighting to keep the infant Mer alive. He had heard the whispers around their pod that the baby was born too small and far too early, and that there was no way for it to survive, and that Rebecca was only needlessly exhausting herself. Nero hated the baby for causing so much strife for his family, and was furious with his mother for risking herself further in an effort to save it.

They have been distant, his mother preoccupied with the baby and her own exhaustion as she continued to weaken, and his father consumed with protecting her and caring for her in all the ways that he could. Nero was far from unwelcome, but he was angry and he worried he would voice his emotions and make things worse.

“You should go to them,” his aunt advised. “Your mother and father love you, and I am sure your presence would be appreciated. Why are you avoiding them?”

Nero shrugged. He did not wish to tell her the truth. “Is she going to die?” he asked. He choked on the words as he said them. It was the first time he had voiced the possibility. He glanced up into his aunt’s dark gaze.

Her expression softened further and she draped a hand over his shoulders to pull him closer. He squirmed slightly, having not expected nor truly desired to be held close. He pulled away from her magenta scales and she did not stop him. “My sister…your mother is very weak right now, Nero. The pregnancy took everything she had, and it is still taxing her to hold on as she is, but she is grieving.”

“The baby is going to die?” he pressed.

Aunt Iliene sighed. “It is in poor taste and spirit to discuss such morbid things, but yes. It was born too early, and too small. The heartbeat is weak and grows ever weaker. The baby will not live long; it has not even the strength to feed.”

“But then why?” Nero hissed. He shook his head and wrapped his arms around his torso. “Why is she still fighting so hard for it? She only grows sicker.”

His aunt pulled him close again and lifted his chin to force him to hold her gaze. “Your mother is grieving, Nero,” she reminded. “It is a terrible thing to lose one you love so dearly. Your mother has always wanted to be just that. She would sacrifice anything for you, you know. She has to let go and allow the infant to die, yes, but she is not ready to give up. She will, in time, or nature will make the choice for her. Rebecca is stubborn, Nero, and desperate to save an innocent life, but she is rational at heart. She will accept the inevitable, and your father will ensure she does not push herself too far. But in the meantime, it would do her good to have you close. You are her son, and she loves you very much. You should go to her.”

Nero looked away. He was not sure how to feel about this heart to heart. It was the last interaction he had been anticipating from his aunt. Aunt Iliene had been bitter and distant for many years. He had not seen the soft side of her personality since he was a very young child. She used to be warm and outgoing and fun, and he had enjoyed her presence. Everything had changed after her daughter was born. She had grown strict and hostile, and cared more for what she considered proper than she did for the wellbeing and happiness of those around her; especially any young Mer and her daughter in particular. It was refreshing see some of her former nature resurfacing, even if he was still awkward with the conversation.

“I do not want to get in the way,” he admitted.

“You will not,” Aunt Iliene assured him. “Your parents will be relieved to have you close, and it is better than sulking about the reef disrupting the sand and disturbing everyone else, yes?”

“I suppose,” Nero agreed. He shifted so his tail was bunched underneath him. Perhaps it was time he went to his mother and father’s sides. “Thank yo-ack!” Nero was cut off as a weight slammed into his back and slender arms wrapped around his neck.

“Hello, Nero!” a happy voice giggled.

Nero scowled and shook his back to dislodge his young cousin. “Get off,” he growled in annoyance.

“Raelyana!” Aunt Iliene’s voice turned sharp and her eyes blazed with fury as she glowered at the young girl. “What are you doing?”

Nero glanced back at the small, six cycle Mer. Raelyana’s eyes cast downward and her colorful fins twitched. “I-I,” she stammered as she wrung her fingers together. “I just wanted to play.”

“It is incredibly impolite to barge into other Mer like that. You are not some witless adolescent hammer shark, now apologize,” Iliene snarled.

Raelyana’s pale blue eyes were wide and shiny as she turned to face Nero with a slumped posture. “I am sorry, Nero,” she murmured. “For swimming into you; it was rude of me.”

“It is alright,” Nero grumbled. He was annoyed with her, but Raelyana was harmless. Too energetic for his preferences, but he knew she meant well enough, and her mother was far rougher on her than she deserved.

“Do not slouch like that, Raelyana; it is poor form,” Aunt Iliene scolded. “Now get home, you should not be wandering around alone like this.”

“But Mother, I-”

“Now!” Iliene commanded. “Nero, you as well. The last thing your parents need is to be fretting about what you are getting up to wandering the reef. Now go. Raelyana, move it.”

His aunt turned away and began to swim off, and just like that, the moment was shattered. Raelyana hiccupped and bubbles shot from her gills.

“I am sorry, Nero,” she whimpered. She darted over to him and hugged his waist, and Nero tensed.

He shifted awkwardly and then patted her on the head. “It is okay, Rae,” he assured her. “You had better go.”

He waited until Raelyana had disappeared over the rise after her mother before he sighed. He felt bad for her and he was pretty sure most of their family agreed; they just respected his aunt too much to say anything. But she had made one valid point; he had avoided his mother and father for far too long and it was time to rectify that.

He turned and rolled his shoulders as he rose in the water. There had been far too much tugging on his dorsal, he was going to be sore the next day. He stretched and some of the ache alleviated, and then he swam off in search of his family.

He found them on the other side of the shelf, resting in the groves of some sand dunes. His father looked up first as he approached, and nodded at him. He was sitting with his tail curled to one side and his fins flicking softly. His mother was leaned against him. Her maternity fins had continued growing after the birth, and darkened to a pink-gray shade. They were now folded tightly over her chest. Her arms were curled up underneath them, but she smiled and raised one out towards him as he approached.

“Nero,” she greeted with a rasp that broke off in a cough that wracked her body. “There you are. I have been worried.”

He took her outstretched hand and settled down into the sand beside her. “I did not mean to worry you,” he replied.

His mother clucked her tongue and shook her head. “Come now, Nero; surely I do not yet look so frail that I cannot have a hug from my son?”

Nero hesitated and glanced at his father, who nodded. Nero leaned forward and wrapped an arm around his mother’s shoulders. His father reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder too.

His mother hummed with content, then stroked the side of his cheek. “These last few moons have been hard on you. I am sorry,” she murmured.

“You have been very brave over everything,” his father agreed.

Nero shook his head. It was not about bravery, and he did not feel very courageous about the past quarter moon. “Mother, please, I fear for your health,” he began as he cupped her hand in his own. “Everyone is talking about the baby and how it is very weak, and how this is hurting you. They have been saying it would be better to-”

“Nero,” his father warned in a stern tone.

“It is alright, Ixion,” his mother cut in. “Let him speak.”

“I just…I do not want to lose you,” Nero begged. It hurt to admit what was in his heart, but he squeezed his mother’s hands and brought them to his cheek.

His mother nodded. She pulled her hand free of his grasp and cupped his face. “I know what they are saying, Nero. And it is natural for you to be afraid; I am touched by your concern, but I promise it is not necessary. The baby is fine. She is small and weak and premature, yes, but she is going to live. She has begun to feed and will continue to grow. The pregnancy and birth has taken its toll on me, but I will recover.”

“The baby is going to survive?” Nero clarified.

His mother nodded. “For now. Nature can be cruel, and she is not a healthy infant, but for now, yes. She will live and with a little luck, she will grow healthy and strong.”

Nero’s heart stalled in his chest for a moment. He wanted to be happy, but he still felt so much bitter uncertainty and resentment. His mother’s gills were flaring with exertion and every movement looked strained. She pulled her hand back in order to cover her mouth as another cough wracked her form.

“But will you?” he demanded.

His mother’s gaze softened, and she nodded. “I will be alright, Nero. Cast aside your worries,” she assured him. “Be happy, Nero. You are a brother now, and you have a little sister now. You were so excited before. Surely a little hardship has not changed that?”

Nero hesitated and looked away. It had changed things.

“Nero, your little sister is going to need your love and support,” his father urged. “She is going to need all of us. You have always been a quiet, reserved child, but you have a big heart for those you choose to let in. All we are asking is that you give the baby that chance.”

“Would you like to meet her?” his mother offered. She carefully sat up a bit and bowed towards his father. “Ixion, would you?” she requested. His father leaned close and pressed a kiss to her temple before reaching gently between the fins curled tightly to her torso. As he did, the fins shifted and loosened so he could get a better hold. When he pulled away, he was holding the smallest child Nero had ever seen.

“You can hold her,” his father offered. Nero hesitated again, and then held out his arms.

“Just be gentle. Support her head and hold her close to your body,” his mother coaxed.

Nero carefully obeyed her suggestions and pulled the infant close to his torso. Her skin was pale and pinky, and her head was coated in very fine brown wisps no longer than his fingernail. Her head fit perfectly in his palm, and her tail had no scales. It was not like him, however, with his rough protective hide. Her skin was soft and delicate, and her tail was tinged a deep blue. “She has no scales,” Nero murmured.

“Not yet,” his father agreed. “But she will. They usually grow within the first few turns of the moon and sun, but hers are growing more slowly. And even when they do, they will be soft and flaky for a while. It is why it is so important to be gentle, and why baby Mer spend so much time nestled within protective fins. You know this.”

Nero gulped and nodded. He was not overly big himself, but the baby felt so tiny that he feared he would hurt her. Her tiny fin was light blue and heart shaped, with two dark blue circles with white eyes in the center. She was pretty.

As he stared at her, Nero could not help thinking about his former resentment. It was hard to hate something so small and delicate, and he thought of Raelyana. The girl was willful and disruptive and she annoyed him, but she did not deserve the hardships and hassles she got from her mother. He could not imagine what it must feel like to be so young and to feel so unwanted. What sort of life was he destining this infant too if he chose to loathe her for something she had no control over? She did deserve as best a chance at life as they could offer her. She was slumbering in his arms, and his heart melted.

“What is her name?” he asked as he glanced up at his parents.

Both of their faces were glowing with pride, but his mother’s eyes shone with pure joy as he made the inquiry. “Kera,” she replied with a bright smile. “Her name is Kera.”

Nero looked back down as the baby stirred and made a very faint whimpering sound. Her fin flapped up and hit him on the arm on the way back down. It barely felt like being tickled by a waving strand of kelp. That did not surprise him, as her fin was barely as large as his hand.

As she shifted, her eyes slowly blinked open and Nero found himself staring at the brightest blue he had ever seen. It was like looking at the brilliant crystal hues of a tranquil lagoon. The baby stared up at him silently before her lips parted to reveal pink gums, and she cooed softly.

Nero’s smile widened and he shifted his grip to waggle a finger at her. “Hello Kera,” he whispered. “I am your brother, Nero. You worried everyone, you know; gave us all a scare. You are so tiny…” he murmured, talking more to himself than to her, really. “But you do not have to worry, because I am bigger, and I will help keep you safe, little sister.”

The baby Mer blinked sleepily up at him as he spoke, and he wondered if perhaps she would simply fall back to slumber. He knew babies tended to sleep a lot.

Instead, her lips opened wider into a gaping grin and she squealed and her fin flicked again. Nero grinned openly with her.

The baby’s smile only lasted a few heartbeats before it crumpled and she began to cry. Instantly, Nero’s smile fell, and he shifted her carefully as she fussed, worried that perhaps his fang filled smile had spooked her.

“Oh,” his mother clucked her tongue and chuckled. “Here, Nero, give her to me. Oh, darling, do not look so spooked; you did nothing wrong. She is probably just hungry. She is still very little, remember.”

Nero nodded and felt a little better as he carefully passed the baby back to his mother. Within heartbeats, Rebecca had her fins curled gently around the infant once more, and the cries slowly died away.

“She smiled at me,” Nero whispered.

His mother pursed her lips and smiled, but shook her head. “Nero, she is too young yet to express emotions like that. It would not have been an actual smile, but I am sure she will smile at you plenty in the future. You are going to be such an amazing big brother.”

Nero shook his head. “She really did,” he protested. He knew his mother – as a healer who had helped with the birth of many little Mer – was not likely to believe his claim, but he held it close regardless. Most of the younger Mer were intimidated by him because of his dark coloring and quiet attitude. All of them except for Raelyana, but he was pretty sure her bubble brain feared nothing. It felt wonderful to see the little Mer smile at him.

“Perhaps she did,” his mother conceded. “I am sure it means the two of you will be the very best of friends.”

Nero nodded eagerly. She was so little, but he decided he desperately wanted her to like him as she grew. “We will,” he agreed. “You are right, she is going to need us, and I want to always be here for her,” he vowed.

His mother smiled and his father nodded, and then Nero found himself being dragged into an embrace. Usually he would squirm and protest, but just this once he let it be. They were a family, and he felt reassured that everything was going to be alright again.