《The Beautiful People》13. Nicholas
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After I helped Mr. Parsons dispose of the tofu, I went back to my room to lay down and relax before supper. It was a nice sized room, but it was actually meant for two people, but I still didn't have the guts to tell the people I work with the truth. I was afraid if they realized my marriage was failing that they'd think less of me and my work. Gerard keeps telling me that's bullshit, and even if he's right it doesn't change the way I feel about it. Sometimes I do feel like a failure, and that attitude has no doubt affected my work in one way or another. This just wasn't the right time to talk about it. Not when everyone's trying to take it easy away from the office. No one wants that rain to come down on their parade. Then there was a knock at the door.
"Come in," I called out.
Jimbo opened the door and closed it behind him. "Hey Nic."
"Hey Jimbo," I said, sitting up in bed. "Everything alright?"
"Yeah, I'm fine." Jimbo said as he walked over and sat down on a chair that was located by the desk. "I just wanted to check up on you. How are you doing?"
"I'm been okay," I replied, trying to act tough. "I've had my good and bad days. Thanks for covering for me about Diane."
"About that," Jimbo said, "I get the impression no one here is aware of your current situation."
"I'm afraid so," I confirmed, "It's rather complicated."
"How so?" Jimbo asked.
"We have someone at work who breaks up with his old lady every six months," I explained to him, "He's on and off again so much no one listens to him anymore."
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"I get it, you want to be sure it's really over first." Jimbo added.
"Yes," I agreed, "I get this is serious, but I want to be sure before I move ahead. I'm not in denial. Part of me really believes she's not coming back. Yet another part holds out hope things might work out. Am I crazy to think that?"
"No, you're not." Jimbo said, scratching his three day scruff for a moment. "Sooner or later they will find out, so it's better to do it on your terms rather than someone else's."
"Fair enough," I said, appreciating the advice. "I'll take that under advisement."
"I always liked you Nic," Jimbo said, "You were good to her, and you deserved to better than the hand you were dealt."
"Thanks," I said, as he clearly knew more than I gave him credit for.
"Are you talking to someone about it?" he then asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked, "Like a shrink?"
"Maybe, or a trusted friend." Jimbo explained, "It doesn't have to be me, or anyone you know for that matter. The important thing is you talk to someone and get it all off your chest. There are even support groups that can help. I found the weekly meetings very supportive when I went through my first divorce."
"How so?" I asked him.
"When you're in a room full of people who are separated or getting divorced," Jimbo explained, "You are not judged by those in the room, cause they all get it. They know what you're going through cause they are too. You'll find it very refreshing. If you want to give it a try, let me know. I'll email you the details."
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"Thanks Jimbo," I said, as I hopped off the bed. "I might give it a go."
"Good to hear," Jimbo said as he stood up. "Clean up for supper and I'll meet you down there."
"Thanks, man." I said, patting his shoulder as he walked tot he door.
"Not a problem," Jimbo said, "See you down there."
After Jimbo left the room, I walked into the bathroom and washed up for supper. I brushed my teeth and cleaned my hair, making it look nice. I didn't bring any suits with me for the weekend, as I suspected being too formal would be frowned upon by the boss. I kept the jeans on I showed up in and just changed my shirt. I had an AC/DC shirt on, and changed it for something with a collar. A nice golf shirt that my Dad bought for me. My old man hated t-shirts and never wore anything that didn't have a button collar. It was just the way he was, so whenever he bought me anything, it always had a collar and at least a few buttons. This seems fitting as I left the top two buttons undone and the shirt wasn't too flashy so that seemed to be not too formal, but not too casual at the same time. Despite what was going on, I wasn't there to impress anyone, nor kiss ass. Because of my current situation, I wasn't in the mood to do anything like that. I'll be polite, and exercise some good manners but nothing above and beyond. I'll let the ladies fight for the best kiss ass award.
"No problem, Nicky." I said to the man in the mirror. "We got this. Just relax, chew your food and don't say anything stupid. Like Gerard said: don't get fired."
I took a deep breath, and then left the room to head downstairs for supper.
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