2 - Fated meeting

“Are you sure this is the place?” The little elf girl asked, while scurrying around the forest floor.

“Of course I am sure! This is where the star fell!” The young boy replied, furry ears twitching as he took in all of the forest’s sounds. He could hear the very distinctive sound that the fallen star emitted, although he had no idea what it actually was. It was an endless vibration, a pulse that permeated the whole forest nearby. They arrived at the edge of the forest, next to the plains. Had the star fallen inside the forest, it would have ignited a huge wildfire, threatening everyone that made the forest their home. It would have been a disaster. But it did not happen, of course, because this was her star.

“Look, look! There it is.” The cat-eared young man was pointing at the red hot smoking mass of metal that was the wreckage of the Defiant. That was Luna’s fallen star, her desire that came true.

“Wow… it’s awesome. I’ve never seen a star from up close.” Replied the elf, ears wiggling up and down playfully. She could barely contain her excitement. She had expressed her most intimate wish when she last prayed at the sky, and now a star had fallen. She had come all the way here to be finally able to see it. She had to lie to her parents too, not because she was too young to roam around by herself, but rather because she was too valuable. Or so they kept telling her, despite her most heated complaints. But that did not matter now, she was determined to find whatever the heavens and the protectors of the forest had sent her.

“It’s late, time to go back.” The young boy told the elf, who was still intent on observing what was happening where her star had fallen. “There’s nothing there anyway.” He said, his voice was low and it hid deep within its tones a slight sense of disappointment. Not because there was nothing here, but rather because the spirits had decided to reward her and not him. It was just unfair how the world behaved. He too wanted his own guardian angel to descend from the heavens.

“You go on ahead, I will be right after.” She said, and saw her friend away. Begrudgingly, he left, producing the most imperceptible rustle of leaves as he went.

“Who is that?” The man had yelled, loud and scary. The boy had already left, and now the elf was truly alone. She stiffened, unmoving, hoping he had not seen her. She wanted to meet him, her own friend who came out of her fallen star. But she wanted to be ready for that. Now that she was sure that he was really there for her, she wanted to make the most out of their first contact. All she wanted to do, for now, was observe. She watched as he disposed all day long of a vast number of bodies, hundreds of them, up to the points of collapse. He must have been a very kind man, as he held so dear the safety of other people’s souls he even forgot to tend to his own body. She had almost approached him when he collapsed, but her friend was still somewhere near here, so she had to stay put. Right now he was going in and out of his strange metal star, collecting strange materials and artifacts he used to make camp outside. He had lit a fire and had started cooking some strange looking kind of meat.

“Hey come here, shadow in the bush… There’s meat!” The strange man called again. He had been doing so every ten minutes or so, incessantly, ever since he first heard a sound. She had been careful not to make a single sound, and yet he was somehow aware of her presence all this time. She did not want to displease his guardian angel, for he had come all the way from heaven just for her. But she was scared, scared he might refuse her, or find her unworthy. She wanted to make friends with him, and be appreciated and accepted. She had to wait for the right time, hoping he wasn’t aware that it was her hiding in the bush.

“Okay, okay, let me get this straight. It’s not that I don’t like vegetables… It’s just that I love meat, ok?” Fenrir spoke, loud and slowly. There were a few sausages grilling over the fireplace, hanging on skewers made out of metal scrap. The sweet aroma of meat was making him hungry, and inpatient. But at the same time it reminded the captain of the smell of the bodies burning on the ship. The charred and broken face of that woman he had found in the corridor, the foul smell of burnt human flesh. It made him sick, but hungry at the same time. “And I can definitely cook. But, for today, I think grilled pork will be enough. Perhaps tomorrow I will bring out the real deal, and make myself a kitchen. Then you will see what real cooking looks like. What do you say, shadow-in-the-bush?” He looked towards the bush.

“Come on, my little imaginary friend. Don’t be scared. The laser gun I pointed at you earlier… is actually broken! The circuitry is fine, however all the batteries are fried everywhere. And the ship’s core is a no go as well. I tried going down there but, man, there’s a hell of a lot of radiation there. Luckily it’s three hundred meters under the rock now. Anyway… I'm getting lonely here… can you please... come? Anyone, please?” He hugged his knees and rolled to the side. The light of the moon was illuminating his pale face, and a few small tears rolled down his face like little lost diamonds. They fell, and were absorbed by the earth. The ground was cold, and hard against his skin. But he could not find the strength to get up, to reach for the few pieces of meat that were going to be his nourishment for the day. He had been busy all day, and hadn’t eaten or drank anything. He felt his dry throat ache and demand some water, his empty stomach cramp and knot in pain. But he didn’t dare move from where he was, and instead observed the far horizon above the plains. There were a few gentle hills covered in grass, and a few lone trees moved by the night breeze. The moon was high in the sky, big and sad. It too seemed to cry in despair together with him and all the stars that hung in the heavens above. They twinkled with the same tune as the small, faint glimmer of light that was being reflected by his tears.

He woke up to the sound of birds chirping. The warm morning light was dispersing the night mist, and gentle rays of sunlight caressed the captain’s face. He turned around, cursing grumpily at the world. Why did it have to be such a fine day? He had already resigned to sleep forever, until one day he found out he would not wake up anymore. His eyes had barely adjusted to the light, and he could only make out blurred shapes, and colors behind the dried tears on his face. The small salt crystals drew lines and patterns on his cheeks. He looked around for a moment, still lying on the hard soil of the ground. There was a strange sensation, something sweet and tender. He felt comfortable, as if he was in a bed of pillows. He felt his head float in a sea of warmth and softness.

“Oh, so it’s you. My dear friend from the forest!” He whispered happily, without even trying to make out the shape he was seeing. After a while, he sighed and smiled gently, eventually lulling himself back to sleep. He had seen the vision of a beautiful goddess laying right beside him, protecting his dreams, and watching over him. He did not want to wake up from this dream. He smiled innocently as tears welled up in his tightly shut eyes. He remembered the happy times he had spent together with his makeshift family, going on adventures together, exploring strange places in the cosmos. He was sobbing and smiling, resting in the warm embrace of his wonderful dream goddess.

“Goddess…” He murmured, still asleep. And when he tentatively opened one eye, and saw her beautiful figure right before his eyes, he felt safe. She was still there, protecting him, guarding him. He happily closed his eyes once again. For the first time in what felt like his entire life, he felt at peace.

He woke up, alone and cold. There was an ominous and eerie feeling all around him. The sun was no longer visible behind the dark, thick fog that had gathered seemingly out of nowhere. The mist looked alive. It moved ever so slowly, creeping into his very bones. The chill and damp air sent a shiver down his spine. He sprung to his feet, in an attempt to fool his mind into thinking that everything was alright. His broken ankle gave up halfway through, and he fell down again. It was ruined beyond repair, he feared.

“Alright, then, my shadow friend. Time to get to work!” He said, then slowly worked his way back into his ship. He looked around for a bit, and emerged once again after a while, empty handed. “But first, let’s deal with this annoying foot right here.” He pointed at his own right foot. The swelling was evident, the skin torn and white. There was no blood flowing from his knee down. “Uh, what is this?” he said as he examined his wound more closely. There was a long leaf wrapped around his ankle, and below it there were strange herbs directly in contact with his skin. “Well, well, well, what do we have here? So my shy friend came to my aid, huh? Well, I thank you for that, but I fear this will not be anywhere near enough to treat me. First of all, all my stem cells died because of the radiation, huhuhuhu.” He burst out in a maniacal laughter at the surreal situation. The blast of radiation that had killed everyone on board would soon kill him as well. What a beautiful ending. “Hehe, don’t get all emotional, now. After all the effort you’ve put into treating me, I can’t just go and die on you, can I? I would certainly feel guilty about that. So... wait right here, will ya?”

He appeared once again after a few minutes, completely covered in sweat. His clothes were even more tattered than before, and were smeared with grease and dirty oil. There were fresh burns that had consumed both the cloth and his flesh, and his whole face was covered with ash. He was holding a small vial in his left hand. “This I call the rad-away. Get it? Rad-away? Cause it treats radiation poisoning? Of course that won’t be sufficient to save me, but at least it will help my foot heal. Hahaha you know, if my chief medical officer was still alive, he might even manage to save me… but he’s dead isn’t he?” He poured the contents of the vial onto the leaf bandaging. He whimpered in pain as the sharp burning sensation seeped into his skin. “This is refreshing!” He smiled, managing to move only half of his face. He got up to his feet, leaning heavily onto a crutch he snatched from the ship’s infirmary.

Night arrived, slowly sapping the world of its light. The mist that hung all around was still there, and the coming of the dark only made it more oppressive. Its whites slowly became blues, the greys and eventually blacks. Everything was utterly black.

“It’s that time of the day again. Well, goodnight then, my imaginary friend. May your sleep bring you sweet dreams.” He shrank into a fetal position and covered his whole body with a blanket. He pressed his body onto the reassuring warmth of the bonfire, but he found out that he couldn’t stop trembling. It annoyed him, and for a moment he considered throwing himself into the fire to make it stop. But he didn’t. Now that he was alone, once again, he found out that he wanted to have somebody to talk to, but had nobody. Not even his friend from the forest.

“What’s with that face? Are you scared?”

There was a pale figure standing in the dark, its face white and covered in sweat.

“You killed us all, remember?” The figure said, then stood still. Suddenly its body began twisting and deforming, assuming unnatural shapes. Its face was grinning, a sick grin that sent shivers down the captain’s back. Blood began spurting from where the broken bones had pierced its skin. The sky had turned red, and the wind was howling. The mist that hung above him turned crimson, and began to rotate furiously. It rotated and rotated, seemingly concentrating all above himself, until the furious cyclone rushed towards him and enveloped him in a deathly dance. Then it disappeared, leaving nothing behind. The air was clear, and the deep dark sky was dotted with stars. The moon was shining its light onto the dreamy landscape. Everything was perfectly still and silent.

I… killed them all. I did that… I… killed. Them. All. Killed. I killed? Killed them? His head was a mess, an undefined tangle of incoherent thoughts. He felt guilt, horror, pain. But then nothing, as apathy followed his sudden discharge of emotion. After a while, nothing had remained, and felt hollow and empty.

He woke up, short of breath, in a pool of sweat. It was cold, and yet he felt he was hot. He felt his goddess, his imaginary friend, the shadow in the bush… she was waiting for him on the other side. She was there, beside him, watching him and taking care of him. He recalled when he first met her in his dreams, yesterday. He had felt safe in her arms. Even if she did not really exist. Even if she was nothing more than a delusion, a figment of his own broken mind. None of that mattered if he could be with her.

He looked around in the twilight. The break of day was close, and the sun had already begun coloring the faraway clouds. They danced merrily, gently led by the ephemeral wind. He heard the sound of rustling leaves, and for the smallest of moments he saw it: a glimpse of a small lock of silver hair, shining under the sun. It disappeared inside the forest. He chased after the vision, ran and ran until his breathing grew heavy and his head dizzy. But he did not want to lose that vision. So he kept chasing.

“Wait! Please, don’t leave me. Don’t… leave me alone…” His last words had been no more than a whisper. If whatever that thing was abandoned him too, then all that was left for him was to wait for his death, alone. He had given up all hope, and was laying on the forest floor. No, I have to go back. Perhaps she will be at the ship. He slowly got up to his feet and began walking back to camp. He saw the dark grey wreckage in the distance, towering well above the tallest trees. There! There she is! Yellow dress, silver hair, and long slender ears of a fairy. It was her, his goddess, his shadow. She was waiting for him near the fire. She was inviting him back. He staggered, almost falling down on the ground. Steadying himself, he advanced through the punishing forest terrain, one step after the other. Finally he had almost reached the clearing. He could see his makeshift camp very clearly now. The angelic figure was waiting for him right beside the fireplace. She was sitting with her bare feet on the soft grass. He gently approached her, plucking a small white flower on the way.

“Here. it suits you.” He said, adjusting the flower into her hair.

“Thank you…” the little fairy replied, shyly. The captain kept looking at her in a daze. He wanted to just get lost in her deep emerald eyes as she took him down to the underworld where he belonged.

Luna watched attentively as the man fidgeted with the embers in the fireplace. He was clearly in distress, and in pain. She wanted to help him, but she didn’t know what to do. This wasn’t how she imagined meeting her new friend from the sky. She could run back into the forest to get help but… how could she explain it to her parents? How could she convince the other elders to help him, a human? And the way he looked at her, with eyes full of awe and hope, made her heart melt. There was a deep fear buried there too, she felt it. He did not want to be left alone, he did not want her to abandon him. And so she remained there, and listened.

In his delusions, he kept talking to her. He talked about his past, his adventures across space with his comrades. All the little gossip that surrounded the lively members of his own adoptive family. The fun stories, the sad stories. He kept reliving his old life through his narrations. Every evening she would come, and he would tell her a story. When he was finished he stared at her for a while, contemplating the beauty and innocence of her cute face. Then, he drugged himself to sleep, plundering the infirmary of all the pills he could find. Every morning he woke up and she would be still there, next to him. He prepared her breakfast, and watched her as she ate his exotic cooking from another world. Then, she would leave, only to return in the evening. The days passed, one after the other.

When she left, he was truly alone once again. He saw the faces of his dead friends in the clouds, in the random arrangements of the flowers, in the casual patterns of the charred hull of the Defiant. He had never told her his last, tragic story. He never shared with her his most dreadful secret, his most haunting memory. He was happy when she was there, because he could forget. Even if only for a moment, he could forget. But now he was alone, and he had not forgotten. Day after day he felt his body fail him. He knew what awaited him. He stared at the clouds as they leisurely passed above his head. His face was pale, his body weak. But that was okay. Soon all the pain would go away. Then it would all be fine. It would all be over. He closed his eyes, certain in his mind that this would be the last of his time. Now he could finally be reunited with his family. He thanked his imaginary friend, who had kept him company all these days, and said his goodbyes.

“Farewell, my friend…”