《Recovery of a Life》Chapter 9
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"..." Xopil watched in silence as he was more or less abandoned in the room. He remained seated at the table as he tried to put some pieces together. Who was I before? Just what is my true existence? I've messed with this whole world, how many such worlds have I... destroyed... similarly? And all this just so I can figure out how to put them back together again? I forced myself into this world. Those two don't seem to be part of the world, at least not any more. Xiara revealed she used to be part of this world, as an elf princess before the fall of the elves. Boris I'm not sure about, but I'm certain he doesn't belong in this world either. More questions than answers and the pool just keeps getting murkier as more questions surface.
"Hell with it now," Xopil rose from the table and barged into the kitchen. "...No, I'm done playing by the rules that it seems I've set, so I'm changing them."
"As you wish, but there's still only so much you can do in your current state." Boris was the first to reply.
"First off, who am I? Don't tell me, 'Xopil' that won't cut it. Who am I to this world, to the two of you? In the grand scheme of everything: Who or What am I?"
"Even if it's you asking we're not supposed to... but well alright."
"Boris, you're going to?" Xiara was genuinely worried.
"Look at him. His eyes are dangerous. Not complying would be the worst case, even after all is said and done."
"In this world, you were born a prince roughly two millenia ago to a king and queen of the elves, as Xopil Wragnaith." Boris began, "That dream or nightmare you have been having... well it's a real event that happens in the past. The fire you experience is actually a camoulflaged space/time spell that pulls you back to this day and age. On a subconscious level, when you fall asleep your mind pieces together the spell and takes you back to relive the moment, not to torture yourself, but to fix it."
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"Are you sure you want this?" Xiara asked for confirmation one more time.
"Yes," Xopil gave a nod as he was still digesting everything Boris had said.
"Very well. You can consider yourself a 'creator' and 'destroyer'. You'd be both right and wrong."
"What like a god?" Xopil waved his hand dismissively. "What kind of god would destroy worlds willingly?"
"That's probably the simplist way to describe it, but it's still inaccurate. Creation and destruction are merely two sides of the same coin. Much like life and death. Without life, there is no death. Without death, how would life sustain itself... Everything eats in some way. Animals eat plants and other animals... In this way, plants are contained with just enough freedom, animals are held at sustainable levels, and a delicate balance is reached, whereby life fills the world and death keeps life at levels where it can thrive in the world. You used to maintain life by monitoring it constantly, killing it off personally. At the time you called yourself 'an indiscriminate murderer', and you hated that aspect of your existence, so you created what can now be called 'a natural balance', and this extends into all aspects."
"... I had such a role, and I'm not a god?"
"Your existence is slightly different from what could be considered a god. For starters, you're not all powerful, all knowing, and you're certainly not everywhere all at once. It'd be better to call yourself a butler or a pawn, maybe a janitor." Boris said thoughtfully.
"What?" Xopil was shocked at that revelation.
"You have the duties of a god, the ability to do fulfill those duties, but not the authority to delegate them to another, so a pawn is the most fitting." replied Boris, "Which brings us to this world you're currently on, solving puzzles to save it. Call it your rebellion from your duties, or maybe 'procrastination' would fit too, but in a sense you're still partially performing your duties since worlds are still getting destroyed, while others receive a reprieve."
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"A pawn, huh? There's worse things. Pawns have a lot of potential for advancement last I checked." Xopil laughed lightly, "... Ok so how do you two fit in to all that?"
"You're actually over my head in hierarchy, but I do have some authority of you... I could be considered an advisor, I can give you ideas and directives but you don't have to follow, at the same time if you're deemed to be shirking your duties, I am able to put you back in your place. I don't know what Xiara has told you, or how much you've figured out on your own." explained Boris.
"I am..." Xiara looked a bit sad as she recalled her origin, "... a nameless companion assigned to you."
"Well, that was only at first wasn't it?" asked Boris, "Go on, tell him the rest."
"You changed me bit by bit, little by little. I could go as far as to call these changes 'improvements', but even so... that you felt I needed to be changed is still a bit..."
"You're confusing him, Xiara." Boris interrupted, "You gave Xiara the ability to experience and adapt. When you gave her emotion, a whole new world opened to her. The little changes you made over a long period of time... well, that's mostly due to her experience and adaptation, she requested more tweaks until she 'felt' right. The result of many thousands of years of tweaks is standing here."
"... Did I do these changes without you wanting them? Do you want to go back to your original self?" Xopil asked sincerely.
"N-no... I'm much happier now. Well, mostly because I couldn't feel happiness before. And, as Boris said, I actually requested all of these tweaks after the initial one. If anything, I miss the feeling..." Xiara trailed off with a blush.
"I didn't do anything wierd, right?" Xopil looked at Boris for the reply.
"Nothing above and beyond what she asked for," replied Boris, "even when she complains 'he made me this way' it's only because she asked for certain things, but her ability to adapt also played a pretty big role; she found things she enjoyed more than others and her adaptability did some additional fine-tuning... so in a sense she did it to herself, but only because you gave her the ability to in the first place. Final tidbit I'm aware of, 'Xiara' is the first name you gave her, and since then her name has changed nearly ten thousand times. Seems you're a bit attached to her first name?"
"..." Xopil fell silent as that sank in. "How do you both fit into this world?"
"As you found out earlier, Xiara was the elven princess. She had forced herself into this world at around the same time you started this puzzle world. Then the war, it nearly broke her heart watching her people suffer as they did so I put her to rest in the room you found her after hastily scrubbing her memories. Seems I had missed a few. As for me, I do not share a part of this world on the same level as you do... I simply replaced an innkeeper that's currently in suspended animation until my role here is no longer needed." stated Boris, "Does that answer what you wanted to know?"
"Above and beyond... There's still some things I want to know, but for now the more pressing thing: when will I get my memories back, or what do I need to do?"
Xiara and Boris exchanged a look, turned to Xopil in sync and shrugged together. "We don't know. We normally have this 'reveal all the things' conversation after you solve the final puzzle, by the time we're done your memories are just... back. When time runs out and you've failed, your memories just return on their own at that point."
"..." Xopil frowned in thought and scratched his chin.
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