《Hero's Resort》chapter 3 : Bunnies
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Inside a dimly lit room, on a desk with several rolled pieces of paper, sets of colorful crystal fragments, and bottles of equally colorful liquids. The owner was slowly scribbling away on a piece of scroll. Next to the desk he was at, an imposing-looking armor made of pitch black, thickly layered scales. Thin red lines occasionally running along the armor's connection points. It was also standing upright, as if somebody was wearing it. But was otherwise completely motionless.
"Hmm, so if I put the command to replay the last movement…" The owner whispers as he keeps scribbling down on the piece of paper.
"Ehh, no that would make it stay in place…" He sighs as he runs his finger along the lines he just wrote, erasing them from the paper….
"What if I make it replay the same action while following a pre-set path?" He whispers again, writing a new set of lines on the paper.
"Ughh, that would make it impossible to traverse uneven terrain though…" He sighs again as he erases the lines once again…
"Hmm. What if..." He tilts his head as he taps the pen he was holding on the desk…
"..." Yet, he just stayed silent…
"Ahhhhh. I don't know. This type of enchanting is really not my thing. Would be better if I just found somebody else to do this for me…" He sighs as he leaves the pen on the table. Then turns to face the armor…
"Guess back to the storage you go." The owner groans as he gets up, tapping the armor on the shoulder a couple of times.
"Or, I can just leave you here for now. I don't feel like dragging the whole thing back down after getting it up here." He adds as he tilts his head. Then turns to leave the small room.
"And it's not like I really 'need' an extra pair of hands right now. So, I guess I can postpone trying to automate the armor to do a couple of chores. For now at least." He shrugs as he exits the small room, ending up in what was essentially a kitchen.
Right next to his left was a wall that continued forward, several dried types of edible materials hanging in lines, from herbs to several types of vegetables, like onions, garlic, and the such. A door was also right next to the corner where that wall ended and the wall right ahead of the owner started. To his right, was the rest of the room. At the rightmost corner was a small sink that had constant flowing water, thanks to the spring. With a set of counters on each side of said sink. Each counter had different utensils on it, one with sets of knives, hammers, and bowls. The other had items such as cooking pots, ladles, and mostly equipment for actual cooking, as right next to that counter, was a thick cube with a metallic top, the only difference being that that cube itself was hollow, and had its front lid removed. The insides of the cube also had a visible darker shin compared to the outside, the reason being that there was usually a fire blazing inside that cube. And finally, on the wall ahead of the owner, were cupboards with dishes, glasses, and a door.
The man glanced at one big plate that was on the sink as he walked towards the center of the room.
"I knew that lizard Demons liked their meat. But I didn't expect that lizard girl to eat a whole friggin cow. Especially considering her figure 'really' did not match that type of appetite. Though I got a paycheck to match, so no complaints." The man ignores the plate on the sink and walks towards the door that was next to the cupboards with the plates. Upon opening that door, he finds himself behind the counter he normally sits at.
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The main room was completely empty right now, and the giant open front door that led outside revealed that it was early morning.
"Alright, let's see what's in store for us today, think I had some reservation set up?" The owner scratches his cheek before walking up to the thick attendance book. Upon opening it, he turns it to the last page…
"Hmm, yea, some garrison guards will be coming, along with their families. So, two males, two females, three kids." The man keeps speaking to himself as he runs his finger along the lines on the page.
"Honestly, guards and their families are the 'only' families I get here. The place is too far from the nearest village for a commoner to come here unarmed. And carriages don't really come this way. Plus it's near the border, so there's the problem of monsters and Demons, and human bandits…" The man sighs as he sits on his usual chair behind the counter.
"You know it's funny how the human bandits are usually a bigger problem compared to the 'big scary Demons'. Wonder why the nearby villages have yet to post a request for a hero or adventurer party to clear them out. It's not like they're hard to track down, what with the trail of destruction and blood they usually leave behind them." The man leaned on the back of his chair as he intertwined his fingers.
"Well, not my problem. As long as they don't come knocking their sorry asses on my front door that is…" He shrugs slightly as he keeps staring outside.
"I just hope no troublesome Demons pop up today. While garrison guards tend to deal with them on a daily basis, most Demons don't actively go out of their way to antagonize them, most of the time at least. So other than the hard-ass Spire squires that get sent here every once in a while, most guards seem to take a live and let live mentality from what I've been told. So it should be fine, as long as nothing 'too' rowdy pops up." The owner folds his arms as he closes his eyes.
"And hopefully the kids won't make too much of a mess. Cleaning after them is a damn pain." He then cracks his neck with another lazy stretch before getting up, taking a pouch from under the counter and opening it. Revealing a rather big sum of gold and silver coins.
Taking them out, he flips one around to reveal the face of a woman stamped on it, curved horns visible on the sides of her head. He then takes another, silver coin out of his pocket. This one having the image of the spire on it instead…
"I'm starting to have more coins with the Demon Queen's face on, rather than the human ones. Heh, you know, thinking about it. I'm essentially biting off at the Underworlds economy by accepting Demon coins. Though, it's like I'm chipping away at a mountain with a fun-sized shovel..." The owner puts the Demon coin back in the pouch, and the normal one back in his pocket.
"Shame I can't really use 'em to buy anything in the overworld. Understandable, but really annoying. Guess I should just melt 'em to their respective bars after I gathered enough. Gold is still gold after all. And as I said to the grocery lady, I'm pretty sure nobody would mind an actual gold bar." The owner then sits down and takes all of the coins out of the pouch, and starts building one bar-like structure for gold ones, and one for the silver ones…
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-A few minutes later…-
"...Not enough…" He sighs as he looks at what was essentially the 3/4th's of a gold bar, and a 4/5th of a silver bar.
"Going to need at least double, if you count the space between each coin…" He sighs as he puts the coins back in the pouch, then puts the pouch back under the counter.
Lifting his head, he then spots a difference in the usual field in front of his spring. That difference being that there were three people on the stone path, walking towards the building. Two adults, one kid…
(Hmm, they're here earlier than I thought.)
Once they closed in, the two adults stopped walking, the woman turned towards the man with a rather mean look, the man himself just kept staring at the ground. All the while the kid just ran up inside the building with a carefree attitude, not paying much attention to pretty much, anything.
It then stopped in front of the counter, which was a tad taller than it. And started jumping in place, its head popping up from behind the counter with each jump….
"My daddy is a pittance of a man! And he spreads his genes to the bunny girls!" The little boy shouts energetically at the owner…
(...What?…)
"Uhh, excuse, me?" The owner blinks blankly at the kid as he keeps staring at it.
"My mommy was shouting that yesterday night!" The kid answers as it stops jumping around, taking a skeptical look.
"Hey mister what are genes? How do you spread them? Why did my daddy give them to the bunny girls? What are bunny girls going to do with them? What are bunny girls? What's a pittance? Why do bunny girls want genes? Bunnies are fluffy!..." And the kid starts a derailing barrage of questions as it starts to bounce in place again. Stopping its quick-paced speech to only breathe in.
And right as the kid was about to start talking again…
"N, now sports don't annoy the good man…" The couple entered the building, the man calling out to the kid.
"Yes Audin, some men are actually good people. So don't bother them with stupid questions now." The woman adds as she keeps her arms folded, her face looking as sour as ever…
(...Huh, I get the feeling that man had a 'really' fun time with the Demons he was supposed to keep out...)
"Ekhem, Yes. So, I take it you are one of the two families that had a reservation?" The owner asks.
"Yes, the other family is not that far behind either." The woman responds.
"We would like for everybody to sit at one table, can we put two tables together?" She asked right after. Contrary to how she faced her husband, her tone was much more polite when she spoke to the owner.
"Of course. Are you going to use the spa as well? Or just dine?" The owner asks.
"I want to swim in the hot water!" The kid butts in right after as its head appears from behind the counter for a few seconds, before disappearing again.
"Yes. But if possible we would like to use it for ourselves and the other family, no other people in." The woman answers.
"Especially no female Demons." She continues as she throws a glance at her husband…
"Of course." The owner answers casually as he opens the attendance book on the last page.
"As you have already made the reservation. You don't need to write anything down. So, any weapons?" The owner asks. The man then walks up to the counter and leaves a broadsword on it.
"I have a slingshot at my house!" The kid shouts once again.
"Audin. Don't bother the man now." The woman put her hand on the kid's head as she turned to look at it. And the kid, pretty much gave no fucks for the lack of a better term.
"Very well, you can go on to the springs if you want. I will make the tables. Now as you will be locking it for yourselves, I'm afraid I can only let you use the shared one. Otherwise you will be taking down two separate rooms. Also, would you like to make your order now? To have it ready once you return?" The owner points at the door frame that led to the spring as he spoke.
"Fried rabbit with potatoes." The woman replies with an almost sarcastic tone as she glances at her husband again. And then they both started to head off towards the door frame, the kid following behind shortly after.
"Hot water pool! Hot water pool!" It shouted excitedly as the trio disappeared behind the curtain.
(...I'm never getting married.)
The owner shakes his head a bit before heading to the tables on the far left side of the room. And then, he gets to work.
A few minutes must have passed in silence as the owner was setting up the tables and chairs. Until a new set of footsteps echoed from behind him.
Turning to glance over his shoulder, he spotted four people, two adults, and two kids. The second couple, this one looking much more, normal? Quiet? Not Demon bunny girl concerned?
"Eh, excuse me?" The man then speaks up as he glances at the owner.
"The second family?" The owner asks back, and the man nods.
"Your friends are already in the spring. You can join them if you want, everything is already set up. Just leave any weapons you got on the counter. Also, they already ordered fried rabbit with potatoes, got anything else to add?" The owner adds.
"Uhh, add a mixed salad." The man answers as he walks up to the counter, leaving another broadsword on it, one that was essentially exactly the same as the other one, which was still on the counter.
The woman and the two kids, one of whom was a boy and the other a girl, went ahead of the man towards the spring's door frame. The man following them shortly after.
And so, after the owner finished setting up the tables, he returned to the counter, placing the two broadswords under it, in different spots so as not to mix them up.
(Hmm, maybe I should ask the guards if they have had an increase in Demons. What with the increase I'm getting. But, if it turns out that they know nothing, that can then draw attention to me. And I already have enough of that, what with me serving Demons and monsters along with Humans. Yea, think I'll keep my mouth shut…)
The owner then decided to head to the kitchen and clean that one dish he had postponed up till now, along with making the order the two families made…
-About thirty minutes later.-
And the table was now fully set, the food giving off a nice smell as it sat on the table. The owner watching the silent field in front of the building from behind the counter. His hands under his chin, his eyes half-closed. A silence, that soon got replaced by the giggling of a hyperactive kid. Said kid popping up through the spa's doorframe a few seconds later, seemingly even more hyper than before.
His parents followed in tow shortly after, along with the other two kids and their respective parents.
"Ahh, I needed that. Add that nothing beats eating right after relaxing in a hot bath." The man who didn't have a bunny adventure speaks up.
And as the two families sat around the table and started to eat. The hyperactive kid, Audin. Stopped his constant noise production. And started to stare intently at the plate with the cooked rabbit in front of him…
(...I get the feeling I'm about to hear more shouting right about…)
"Hey mom, did dad give this bunny his genes too?" The kid blurts out as he points at the cooked rabbit. Causing almost everybody on the table to choke, other than the guilty man himself, and the other two kids.
(Now…)
"Audin!" As the mother raises her voice, the kid darts away from the table, keeping a constant rhythm of laughter as it ran.
Only to end up tripping on the small steps that led to the recessed stone floor and faceplant itself on the stone slabs with a thud. Yet before anybody could react, it just got back up again and started running once more, same laugher and all. Making a beeline for the exit…
"Oh Goddess damn that kid…" The mother groans as she starts to get off the table as the kid ran out of the building.
"I will watch over him, enjoy your meal." The owner raises his hand as he gets up from his chair, then turns to head towards the exit. The woman replies with a 'thank you' and sits back down…
The moment the owner got out, he found the kid running around the front field.
"I wouldn't go too far out kid, kobolds tend to find your kind, tasty." The owner speaks up as he casually walks up to the laughing kid.
"Ha! My dad can beat any kobold! I'm not scared of them!" The Audin responds as it triumphantly sticks out his chest.
(You are not scared of them because somebody else can beat them? Kid logic at its very best…)
"I'm sure you do. And that is why I need you to make sure that no kobolds pass through that door." The owner points his thumb behind him as he speaks, towards the building's entrance.
"Huh, why?" The kid asks.
"Because there are people who are not able to beat kobolds in there, and your dad is taking a break. A hero would protect those who can't fight right? Or, are you a villain?" The owner responds as he folds his arms.
"I'm a hero!" The kid shouts as he sprints straight towards the door…
(...Heh, I actually used the same trick on a hellhound Demon once, just not with the hero and villain part. And it worked, for a few seconds, as she then proceeded to chase me across the volcanic region for making a fool out of her. Or was it because I called her a good dog? Can't really remember...)
The owner shakes his head before also heading back to the door and sitting by the porch steps. The kid standing 'guard' next to him…
Though, you can guess how long it was able to stay quiet…
"Hey mister." Audin speaks up right about fifteen seconds later.
"Are you a hero?" He asks as the owner turns to glance at him.
"Was, I did what the goddess asked of me. Now you can say I'm a retired hero." The owner answered.
"But your hand does not have the goddess's mark." The kid responds as it points at the owner's right hand.
"It disappears once you retire." The owner answers flatly.
"But, you look younger than my dad to be retired. Are you actually like, really, really old?" The kid asked with a frown.
"Uh, no. I'm as old as I look. Heroes retire pretty fast if they can finish what they were tasked to do." The owner replies with a chuckle.
(That, or they get killed in the process even faster.)
"So that means you killed the Demon Queen!" The kid shouts.
"That's what all Heroes must do after all!" It continuous.
"Nope, didn't kill the Demon queen, but my job was still done either case." The owner replies with a shrug.
"Pfft, lame. You're a fake hero then. Real heroes must Kill the Demon Queen! Not let somebody else do it for them!" The kid shouted excitedly.
"So you're aiming to become a hero and kill the new Demon Queen then?" The owner asks with a slight chuckle.
"Yes!" The kid replies sharply.
"But my dad won't let me leave the house by myself yet…" It then adds with a whisper.
(I'd say his dad's smart. But he did get seduced by a Demon bunny girl, or by a group of them. Seeing that these Demons usually wander around in groups…)
And speaking of the devil, the kid's father walks out of the building.
"Hope he didn't cause you too much trouble." He says as he walks up next to the kid, putting his hand on its head.
"To the amount that he probably caused you? Not even close." The owner chuckles as he gets up. The guard just lets out a knowing sigh.
"Are you done, or?" The owner then asks.
"Yea, we ought to pay and get moving. It's a long walk to the village, and I don't want to be in the fields with my family after it's dark." He responds as he ruffles the kid's hair.
(I'd normally make a bunny joke now. But the poor guy had gone through enough, from what I have seen at least.)
"Alright. Let's go back inside then. You still have your weapons to take back." The owner motions with his head as he enters the building, the guard nodding as he turns to enter the building with the kid.
"I can't enter! I'm guarding for kobolds!" The kid shouts as his father starts to drag him back in…
(Who knew, the only reason the current Demon Queen is still alive is because Mister Bunny man here, is holding Sir Kills-a-lot from leaving the house alone…)
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Inhuman Warlock
The boy has no powers, they claimed.
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