《Wading Through The Dark》Cloudy with a Chance of Human Bodies

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It was a normal old regular type of day. People got up and made breakfast, some tiptoed around the house to avoid waking their kids too early, coffee was poured, and eyes were wiped clean of sleep dust. In the streets, car engines purred as the early morning rush hour began and shop owners turned their closed signs around to open. It was a regular morning, except if you found the raining bodies to be an issue.

When the familiar grey clouds started to loom overhead people knew what was coming. Soon bodies would begin to pour down onto rooftops, sidewalks, and even the roads. They would land with either a splat or a giant crunch, depending on the surface but either way the noise was always present. But of course, gloomy weather was an expected part of life and people trudged on with their day without the warming presence of the sun. Naturally, this would cause some minor changes that needed to be made.

The blood was easy, the power-washer cars would soon be out to clean up the scarlet sludge as soon as the storm was over just like a snowplough after a blizzard. The bodies posed more of a threat, driving over them was bumpy and could cause serious damage to any ordinary vehicle. Not to mention the huge amount of damage that was posed by a body crash landing on the roof of a car or heaven forbid a windshield. It was clear that something needed to be done, and many businesses claimed they had the perfect solution.

Boulet Inc. was one of the first big companies to put out a potential solution to some of the issues caused by raining bodies. This life-saving product was creatively called The Boulet Inc. Deluxe Frontal Clearer but would soon come to be nicknamed by the general public as "Buzzsaw Bumpers." This extension of the car's front would conveniently chop away at any stray body that crossed the path of the vehicle making travel much easier in stormy conditions. At first, consumers were not extremely thrilled with the idea of ground-beefing human beings, but as there was no alternative on the market at the time, sales soon began to skyrocket.

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Seeing the lucrative business opportunities other companies started to jump into the market. Raymond Car Automotive acted fast and patented a design of a reinforced car hull. It would become a must-have for all future carmakers and would be remembered for its signature catchphrase of "A Raymond Body for Raining Bodies!"

Many more products were soon put to line, some caught on like wildfire while others sank into obscurity. Things like Wendy's Reinforced Windshield Wipers, Fred's Friendlier Sunroof, and the Disturbing Sound Muffler were all enormous hits. While things like Double Blade Wheels, The Body Net, and the infamous Human Funnel failed to find their niche.

While the thought of hundreds to thousands of human bodies occasionally crashing down on the world may seem like it would be considered mostly a negative thing, some positives come from it. New jobs were opened up and people were able to find new employment as body cleaners and bodily-rooftop disposal men. Builders and construction workers saw a big upswing in work when the new laws called for every building to have a cover walkway installed so that people exiting their cars wouldn't have to worry about being crushed by the weather. Still, though, one can't help but wonder what life was like before the bodies started to rain.

I hear it caused quite the ruckus when it first started happening. There was mass panic, which is funny to think about due to how ordinary and common it is now. Scientists, doctors, politicians, and everyone was rushing to figure out why the 'freak events' were happening and how to stop them. At first, it was assumed that it was some freak act of terrorism and fingers got pointed in all directions, but mostly at Russia. After that was eventually ruled out, theories started popping up everywhere. A popular one was that all the bodies were just people from the future trying to perfect going back in time and failing miserably. It was a fun thought, but science showed that it was directly tied to some drastic change in the weather. Of course, we know that they never figured it out, and likely never will, but I hear some are still trying to put an end to it.

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Crime rates went unpleasantly low, which is something that is not normally said. Normally low crime rates have a good connotation, but not when bodies are falling out of the sky. It became slowly clear how easy it was to get away with a crime when it happened to be a rainy day. Murder someone? Just throw them in the street and wait for the cleanup crew to arrive. How did they die? A body fell on them. Where's the evidence? Try getting a blood sample with the flood of it in the street. Over time this was just something people would have to accept would happen, and soon that became shockingly easy.

People grew accustomed to the occasional crunch or splat, kids would play count the bodies on a long ride home from school, and some extremists tried to draw attention to the possibility of using the spare 'meat' as an alternative to other animal products. It would cut costs and even potentially carbon emissions caused by giant cow farms and such. But this was ultimately struck down for the obvious reason- the mega-corporations running the meat industry wouldn't allow it. However other uses for spare human parts were found.

When a body would fall on a soft spot or some other lucky space, it was natural that its inner parts would go to some use. After all, it's not like they're using their vital organs anymore. Hearts, kidneys, livers, and any other spare part were all put to good use. Waiting lists became shorter and lives became longer, it would seem that this raining body thing was a splendid thing to happen after all.

It's funny, it's strange to think of a world where this didn't happen. It's become so normal to everyday life that the dead stare on every splattering body is as remarkable as the lines on the road. Of course, there a times when I wonder, times when I lay awake at night and get a dreadful feeling that something isn't right, but over time that feeling fades. It's okay to have doubts about the world you live in, it's only natural. But ultimately, it's only cloudy with a chance of human bodies.

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