“Hey, Jeremy.”

“Um, y-y-yeah Mike?”

“What’s wrong with this picture?”

“What picture?”

Mike swept his right arm around the office room.

Jeremy looked up from the camera feed, “Uh. Um. The d-dark-darkness down the halls?”

Mike shook his head while leaning back in his chair, “No, that’s always been there.”

Jeremy studied the room a bit longer, “Oh! They put a new shade of grey on the walls?!”

“No, it’s the same dull color it’s always been.”

“Um, the air is a bit less….stale?”

Mike facepalmed, “No, Jeremy. Tell me, what’s the one thing that has been a constant source of grief for us since we first took this godforsaken job?”

“Um, the Animatronics?”

Mike slammed his palm on the table, causing the whole thing to rock a bit with the force, “Yes! Exactly! Those motherfuckers haven’t even attempted to attack us yet! What the fuck is their deal tonight? What time is it anyway?”

Jeremy straightened up in his seat, and looked back at the camera. Thankfully, the music box was still wound up to full, “W-w-why is that a bad thing? Oh, and uh, 1:24 ”

“The Hell is taking so long?! Foxy should’ve been in the hallway five seconds ago! Here I was, all psyched to finally wreak my everlasting vengeance upon those fuckers, and they’re fucking flaking on me!

Seriously, the one night I actually want to get jumped, they don’t attack me! Especially after last night, when they had the balls to come into the room three at a time? The fuck?”

Mike got up from his chair, and stomped over to the front hallway entrance. Jeremy put down the camera and held out his hand as Mike shouted, “Come on you robo-fucks! I’m right here! Come and face Justice!”

Silence was the darkness’ reply. Mike frowned, scrunching up his face as he stomped back over to his seat beside his fellow Night Guard.

Jeremy breathe a sigh of relief and picked the tablet back up, “Well, um, how about we talk about something else? You know...to...get your mind off things?”

Leaning back in his seat, Mike pulled his hat over his eyes, “Yeah, sure. I’m all ears.”

“Ok then. Uuuuuhhhhh…”

Both men sat in silence for sometime. They hadn’t really had any moment to just...hang out. Their schedule generally consisted of:

1. Go to work at 12 AM.

2. Try not to die until 6 AM.

3. Stay at work until 3 PM.

4. Walk home and rest.

5. Repeat.

Naturally, much of their energy was devoted to numbers 2 and 3. As such, they never really had a moment to talk to each other about normal things that didn’t have to do with some machine trying to bite their faces off. Sports, TV, even Mike’s very existence in 1987, all took a backseat to surviving just one more night of terror.

‘Well, what better time to change that than the present?’ Jeremy thought as he started winding the Music Box again. “Soooooo….how’s your training been going?”

“Pretty good. Beat my record yesterday.”

“Cool.”

…..

“You into boxing at all, Jere?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

…...

They both spoke in unison, “Into Warhammer 40k?

Yes!”

Mike swiveled in his chair, smiling, “Oh man! You have no idea how good it feels to find a fellow fan boy!”

“I know right!” Jeremy quickly put down the tablet and turned in his seat, “Most people hardly even know what you’re talking about—”

“Unless you explain every little detail to them!”

“Yeah!”

“Hey, you know the tagline, right?!”

Jeremy smiled, and stood up placing his right hand over his heart, “ ‘In the grimdarkness of the 41st Millenium….’ ”

“ ‘there is Only War….’ ” Mike continued also standing up.

“ ‘....and awesomeness!’ ” both men finished, their voices ringing off the walls of the establishment. They sat back down and began to speak to each other, overjoyed to find someone who was fascinated in the same things they were.

The clock struck 2:00.

Something moved.

'Calm down BB. Be brave like the Captain said.'

The smallest and sneakiest of the animatronics next to the Marionette, Balloon Boy had become like a messenger among the animatronic family. His ability to get into, and out of, the office is an invaluable tool when it comes to getting at those two humans. All he needs is to get close, grab the batteries, and it’s goodbye Night Guard.

Well, that’s how it was. The little robot was about half-way down the vent by now, dragging his bulky body along despite the fact that his hands being rounded balls.

'Just need to get in, grab the square...thing and get out.'

However, that tactic quickly went out the window when the second Night Guard showed up. When he took the batteries out of one flashlight, the other one could cover for both of them. BB was fast, but not fast enough to steal the batteries out of both of the devices at the same time.

BB had reached the lip of the vent by now. He could here the two humans chatting and yelling about something. They both sounded angry, “I can’t believe GW let Matt Ward do that to the Space Marines!”

That was the blonde haired one, Jeremy BB remembered, but the one that he was staring at was the newest Guard.

Mike Schmidt.

“Trust me! I’m still as angry as when I heard about it the first time!”

“GW can’t let him get away with that, can they? I mean, he just took some of the most badass dudes in the Imperium and turned them into a bunch of fucking Mary Sues!”

“You think that’s bad? Let me tell you about a little something called ‘Multilasers.’ ”

While he wasn’t sure what they were talking about, it was enough to distract them from the tablet on the desk. BB slowly reached his free arm up, carefully inching towards the device.

'Al...most...there.'

“He did what to an Eldar Farseer named Taldeer!?!”

“Tortured her for 20 straight pages for no reason. Thankfully, she shows up in the sequel to the game the book was based off of, Dark Crusade, so it’s not canon as far as the games are concerned.

'Just…..a little...further.'

Still, what he did with to the Warhammer 40k lore is almost as bad as someone trying to steal the tablet right from under our noses.”

Got it! Wait, what did he—?

Balloon Boy felt something grip his hand, hard, and then he was off the ground hanging from Mike Schmidt’s outstretched hand.

Mike smiled as he observed the small robot, eyes shining with fervour, “I was wondering when one of you would show up. Though to be frank, I expect Foxy or maybe that big brown fuck. Instead, it’s you,” he stretched out the word to make it sound as menacing as possible. “Not that I’m complaining.”

BB was a robot, so he didn’t necessarily grasp the idea of fear. As far as he could compute, being brave was exactly what Mary and the Captain had defined for him. As such, even though Schmidt looked at him with those cold, piercing eyes, he should’ve been able to twist out of the vice grip on his arm and grab the tablet.

But for some reason, he couldn’t move.

All of his circuits had locked up.

He could only think of one thing.

'Captain, please help me.'

“Bro, check the Music Box. I’m gonna have a little ‘chat’ with our thief here,” Mike stood up from his chair, grinning with the idea of finally delivering justice upon one of these animatronic fucks.

Jeremy, shaking off the shock of BB getting in the room, picked up the tablet….and froze.

Sensing his friend’s discomfort, Mike turned back over to Jeremy, “What’s wrong, mna? Foxy in the hallway?”

“No, worse.”

“That weird Golden thing is in the room?”

“Worse than that.”

“Freddy and his fuckbuddies are on the stage about to sing a horrible rendition of ‘My heart will go on.’ ?”

“No. Wait, why would…? Nevermind. No worse. The Music Box. It’s gone.”