We, once again, were gathered near the stage on which Albrecht stood, all smug and pleased with himself. I wanted to run again. I kept thinking the flag thing was an accident, I did it by chance. I was so scared and panicked, but I somehow managed to pass him and get the flag, but was it really me or did he just let me take it?

I felt my breath catch in my throat and the way how my lungs constricted again implied a panic attack coming on. I was not over that man, I was failing, and I was having a panic attack. And Vince was not there to stop it from happening.

I slumped to my knees and tried to drink the air, but it wouldn’t flow into me. I was suffocating and I knew it, but there was nothing I could do. I could feel the stares of surrounding people boring into me and I knew, I really did, I needed to stop, to pull myself together, but I just couldn’t.

Somewhere, in the back of my head, I could hear it. I could clearly hear the words he whispered to me so reassuringly, so tenderly, so matter-of-factly. Strong. Safe. Invincible. I concentrated my attention on those words. Repeated them like a mantra, grasped onto them as a lifeline.

Finally, I drew in a deep breath and braced my knees with my palms. Putting some strength into my feet I pushed myself up, straightening out and heaving in another couple of breaths. I chanced a glance around. Wann was staring as if I had just killed someone, the rest of the team had disgruntled expressions on. The strangers around looked amused, but mostly ignored me and looked on as Albrecht rambled on and on about today’s task.

Even after I managed to calm down, I wasn’t paying any attention to the man on the stage. I searched out the group near the stage and found the sharp-featured pale face with those deep steely blue eyes peering at me with worry and, was it fascination? He smiled bitterly at me as if showing how proud he was but also worried. I tried to return the smile, but it faltered and I managed only a grimace which made him seem even more discouraged.

I hated being weak. I was used to being strong, in control, confident. I was utterly unprepared for this, for this feeling of hopelessness, utter defeat, fear.

Vince turned away and was walking slowly, following the other assistant instructors. I was starting to feel disappointed, wanting him to keep looking at me, keep smiling at me, I didn’t want him to go away. I wanted him with me, near, so I could protect him, save him, make him proud of me…

“Tooth, move,” grumbled Wann and pushed me forward.

I stumbled, still disoriented and confused. I looked at him and he just walked on dragging me by the hood of my winter coat. He released me after five minutes of stumbling and swearing when we reached a sort of a clearing in the woods.

In the middle of the clearing was a circle formed with piled snow which was cleared from the center towards the edge. It looked like a fighting ring we had back at the academy but was double the radius and it was made of damned snow.

“What the hell?” I cursed and in return got a grunt and a sharp stare from Wann.

“You- You missed the whole ex-explanation?” his incredulous eyes were burning me alive and I took a cautionary step back.

So what if I missed the explanation, I bet it would take five words to explain the whole situation, but that man took up to half an hour to introduce. I scoffed and bound my arms on my chest. I stared at Wann, waiting.

“We fight. Five minutes each. Like a tournament.”

There, see. It was seven words, but I made my point.

“Wait. Fight?” I scanned the crowd and noticed a couple of people already getting ready with warm-ups and stretches. “As in actual fighting? Why?”

“To demonstrate our abilities and combative skills,” answered Miller.

I glanced back to the ring again and made quick calculations. There were sixteen teams in total, each team had five persons, so that made eighty people. So two people at a time for five minutes makes around three hours of this bullshit. And the sun was starting to come out strong and hard and I could feel my skin, which was not covered by the mask or the goggles, burning. The longer we stayed there, in that clearing, the more I realized how horrible the situation was.

“The whole time?”

“What?” Wann, Dark, and Rodd asked in tandem, voices confused.

“Do they have to last the whole five minutes. What if someone KOs another?”

“Then another pair proceeds. It’s just a time limit-”

“If you listened properly. Instead of groveling. Now you’d know. All of this. Jun, no more. Get ready. All of you,” Wann barked and removed his own jacket.

My eyes bulged at the motion and I shivered. Wann started stretching and warming up, too. So did others around me. Everyone expected it to be over soon. Or they were trying to get used to the cold. I didn’t move. Shifting my arms a little bit, I hugged myself tighter and tried not to think about how cold it was outside despite the sun blaring above us.

I yielded with a thought it would be better to just get over it quickly and be done with, so I settled with just observing until it was my turn to fight.

The clearing was wide enough to accommodate around a hundred of us. The trees seemed to have naturally formed the space, but upon further observation, I noticed quite a few tree stumps recently cut. In one of the trees, I noticed something shimmering and stalked closer to it. I found one of the cameras for surveying the surroundings and the activities. Finally, I knew how it looked and I could be able to find them much better and faster if I needed to get rid of their visibility for one reason or another.

With that in mind, I walked around the clearing while the first fights were happening. I counted about fourteen cameras hidden in the trees, all facing the snow ring. It wasn’t hard to understand why the ten-person council was not there, only the assistant instructors. The old men were probably somewhere warm and comfortable, watching from afar on the screens.

I felt an urge to tear all the cameras down and make the old men come out to the cold and evaluate the performances, but a clear, carrying voice interrupted my thoughts. Vince was arbitrating the fights and just then he called for a KO.

I was slightly shocked to hear his voice as I remember it, not the heavy ragged one from last night. His eyes were still slightly red and puffed, but he held on with utmost confidence and stood strong as if nothing happened. I smiled at his effort to pretend, but the heavy feeling in my heart remained as a dark reminder of an impending danger.

Nevertheless, I couldn’t really do anything – the curse couldn’t be lifted or destroyed. There was only one outcome for Vince and it was a bad end. Humans were unreasonable, and even if Vince never hurt anyone, he’d still be considered a monster and hunted as any other supernatural being. It made me sick to the stomach, the unavoidable truth of me being unable to change it.

The announcement of another fight concluding pulled me out of my thoughts and I tried to concentrate on the events happening in the middle of the snow ring.

There were two hunters standing in the ring. One was small, the other was double the size of his opponent. At first, I thought the small one was a girl, but I was mistaken. It was the captain of the Japanese team and he was not a woman. In the first seven seconds of the match, the small man rendered useless the bulky American team member and effortlessly won the fight.

To say the least, everyone was left speechless. Even Vince took a moment to get his bearings to call the match end.

If I hadn’t been what I was, I wouldn’t have caught the exact method the little man used to defeat his opponent and it was pressure points. He used three pressure points to knock the other man out in record time and I really wanted to learn that technique.

The only reason why I still haven’t learned it was the danger of entering East Asian countries. Their hunter network was top form and I just never wanted to risk being captured and experimented on, because let’s face it – Asia was the most messed up in the experiment department with the supernatural beings. I’ve heard of China’s hunters making Moon Walker and Creation hybrids, but never saw actual proof of it happening. Not that I wanted to find out. Anyways, my point was, the eastern hunters were as scary as Albrecht was and I really did not want to risk being caught by any of them.

The matches resumed with Dark following the Japan’s team captain victory. She shifted her arms in front of her, shoulders hunched, after a moment moving her palms back to her back and wiping them on her pants when a German team member stepped into the ring.

I knew for a fact we would lose a point with her, but it couldn’t be blamed on her. Her opponent was regularly built, but his muscle structure, from what I could see through his light thermal clothes, showed signs of tough training regime and skill embedded into his motor skills.

Dark fought well and held out for four minutes evading and dodging and blocking his advances, but in the end, she collapsed due to fatigue, and we did lose a point.

As Rodd explained, the point system consisted of team members winning. So we won’t be fighting until only two remained, but until every member of every team fought. The team of whose members all won would get five points plus the additional ten possible points for each member depending on the skill and technique demonstrated. So we lost one point, but Dark most likely earned us around eight points with her evading and blocking. So we were not the last yet.

The fights continued without much interesting happening. Fist fighting and nothing too elaborate. After the Japanese captain showed his skills, no one really could compare.

Rodd and Miller both were average at fighting but somehow managed to pull through. Miller actually ended up decking Egyptian opponent to the nose, making him unable to continue due to pain. And Rodd simply pushed his Peruvian opponent out the snow ring which counted as a win for us.

Wann astounded everyone by slugging an Australian captain and rendering him unconscious with one concentrated punch to the solar plexus. He took five seconds, and he was incorrigibly smug about beating the speed record of the Japan’s captain. On the side, I heard the Japanese cursing him out to his team.

“Are you nervous?” asked Dark after Wann stepped out of the ring.

I looked at her and pondered for a moment. I wasn’t nervous to go fight some random mortal in front of other humans, even if they all were hunters. I could take any of them and come out victorious in the end. I was concerned about the clouds clearing and the sun blazing hotter than it had in these couple of days we spent there. The small patches of exposed skin already stung and itched. Even though I tried to hide in the shadows, it did little to help.

“No. Not really,” I finally answered. “I just really don’t want to take off my coat. Or my gloves. Or my mask. Or my goggles.”

“You can keep the mask and the hat,” came a voice from behind me. “Lose the coat and the goggles.”

Wann still had that smug smirk on his face, but the glare he was giving me told he was having second thoughts about the whole thing with me and me losing some protection from the sun.

“But why?” I couldn’t really understand why I couldn’t keep warm and not blinded by the sun. Wouldn’t the coat minimize my movements?

“Because the coat might soften the blows. And the goggles give you an advantage, too,” supplied Miller with a little pout on his lips.

“Fair enough,” I agreed. “But I will start steaming if I stay there too long.”

“Finish it in three seconds,” Wann deadpanned.

We all looked at him as if he just confessed his undying love to me, but, to be honest, that’s how I felt in that moment after hearing those words. He was giving me permission to be better than him at fighting. I couldn’t contain the smile slipping out. Wann saw it through all those layers of protective gear and kicked my shin grumbling to not get used to it.

Finally, I heard my name being called and sprang to my feet. I reluctantly zipped off my coat and shook it off. Gave it to Dark to keep warm and marched off.

“Hey. The goggles,” reminded Wann.

“I’ll give them to someone near the ring.”

As I walked to the ring, my opponent was already jumping around, stretching. By the mark on his thermal clothes, I realized he was from Congo. He was a bulky, muscular man.

To be honest, I was conflicted by the fact that among eighty participants, there were only six women, including me and Dark. And only one of them, not counting me, had a chance to win because her opponent was a strategist and not a field hunter.

So I walked to the ring, and the German assistant instructor told me to remove the goggles. I glanced at Vince, who was staring at us intently, trying to measure the possibility of me being exposed. Which was honestly tremendous at the rate the sun was blazing despite it being so cold. I could swear it was below zero, and I could clearly see my own breath coming out with every huff and puff.

I moved as slowly as possible, waiting for that one fortunate cloud to block the sun long enough for me to kick the ass of a man three times bigger than me.

The second the cloud covered the most of the sunshine, I removed my goggles and jumped into the ring, pleading Vince to announce the start of the match. He did so instantly, taking my opponent by surprise.

I didn’t really have much time to plan out my strategy. I thought of getting the man on his back and then attacking his throat to immobilize him. As I stood to kick his legs to disrupt his balance, the man proceeded to move a step back to retain it and stay standing. And then I knew I did not have much time left.

I knew I couldn’t use all of my strength to fight him, because then I would have exposed myself. So I stuck to my initial plan to get him on his back. In the end, I was half a minute into the fight and he still was standing strong, and the sun was peeking out behind the cloud, and the uncovered part of my face began to burn slightly.

As the cloud moved away completely, I had no choice but to try and hide from the light in the shadow of the large man. That required for me to be close to him, and his punches packed quite a bit of force, and I did not like it one bit either.

At some point, I glanced back at my own team and caught Rodd for a short moment. And I knew I had to give up on a showy performance, and concentrate on an actual win. So the moment we positioned ourselves so that I was standing in the man’s shadow, I sprinted into the man, lodged myself into his lower half and pushed. At the edge of the ring, I felt him grabbing onto me and trying to lift me off the ground, which would have foiled my own plans to push him out the ring. So I had to let go and wriggle out of his grip.

He was at the edge, all I needed was one little nudge and he’d be out. I braced myself as I stepped backward, leaving his shadow and exposing my skin to the scorching heat. I walked right back to the opposite edge of the ring, the man was watching me with interest, not moving from the spot, which was amazing, given that I planned to slam into him with everything I had.

As I touched the snowy rim of the ring, I ducked down and launched myself at the unknowing man. I was fortunate he hadn’t thought of moving from the spot I left him at. I was also fortunate that I didn’t slip on the trampled up snow while kicking off the ground and kicking the man’s chin with my knee. The impact was so strong, I felt his jaw crack under the force of my knee. The heavy body actually lift off the ground and slammed onto it on the other side of the snow boundary.

It took the German guy some time to announce the end, because, apparently, it’s not every day they see a shorty of barely hundred sixty centimeters jumping up to slam a knee into a two meters tall man.

Before the guy actually called my victory I was already heading back with my goggles on my face again. The tug on his hands shook him out of the astonishment and he called a point to Huntig team then.

“Thanks,” I said to Dark as I took my coat and zipped it up around me, relishing in the warmth.

The remainder of the fights passed without much interesting to tell. There still was a commotion after my performance, but I decided to tune it out in favor of standing in front of the sun and feeling it heat up the jacket, my legs covered in jeans, my face protected by a mask and goggles, head covered with the hat. It felt so fantastic, so relaxing and accommodating. It probably felt like a mother’s embrace, but I couldn’t be sure, because I had no mother to embrace me.

These thoughts never lead to anything good. It made me think back on all those ages ago when I first met my creator, I will not call him my father, and he told me all about how I came to be and what was left of my mother. I might have been too small to actually remember, but I knew, I just knew I killed her when I was tearing my way out of her belly. I was a beast and I killed her with my own hands because I didn’t know better. Because I was not supposed to be at all, thus my mother had no knowledge of my coming either. It could have been avoided if it wasn’t for that bastard who decided to experiment with the forces which were not meant to be played with.

Instead of remorse, I felt rage bubble up inside me for that lunatic who thought human life was not precious enough to leave it alone. He just had to go and mess with the natural order of life. Just like another demented psycho, only this one was human. Albrecht was worse than the one who made me because he himself was a human, and he was playing with other humans’ lives. My rage rose even more; I felt my jaw tense and my nails dig into my palms even through a layer of leather gloves.

Suddenly there was a smack on the back of my head and I faltered. Confusion twisted my face, but Wann was not able to see it, still, I know, he must have felt it, given he had a huge grin on his face.

“Reign in, would you?” he grumbled. “Jump higher next time,” he scoffed.

“I could have, but I didn’t want to draw too much attention.”

“I think, that was sarcasm,” supplied Miller. I gave him a glare, which was completely ignored. Probably because of the goggles.

“You could have blown your own cover. And then we would have been disqualified. Do you want that?” grumbled Rodd.

“No,” I brought my hands to my pockets and turned back to the sun. “I just had to finish it quick, or I would have started to smoke. That would have given me away more than an ability to jump high by using a run-up force.”

“Guys,” Dark intercepted into the banter when she saw there was no end to it. “We have four solid points for our wins. I’m sorry I lost our win point, but I suppose, they will give me seven or six points for evading. So we have four, plus additional, let’s say, six, then at a minimum everyone got at least seven points, so that makes around forty-two points.”

“That might land us at the top ten,” Rodd stated and scrunched up his nose. “But, given the fact, that Hellsing and Fang showed unparalleled skill, they might get full points, don’t you think?”

Everyone nodded in agreement and seemed to brighten up at the idea of maybe landing the position at top five.

I would have said I didn’t care about such things, but the deal with Albrecht made me reconsider. We had to come out first, otherwise, I would be screwed, literally.

The others were still discussing the possibilities of our place at the ranking, while I was offhandedly watching the rest of the ongoing fights. Vince still was busy with it and I was getting impatient.

I was getting too attached to the man and I knew it, but I couldn’t make my brain stop and to let him go. There was something stronger than my willpower at work, and I could only cede to it and carry on.

While the sun was still high and bright in the sky, the oncoming night worried me immensely. Even though it wasn’t the beginning of the full moon, it still was powerful, it could still affect him beyond his control. I didn’t want him to suffer. I didn’t want to see him suffer again. It was too hard to bear. He already was dealing with disappointed parents, bullying from Wann, but most importantly, he was self-deprecating, blaming and loathing for what happened to his brother and, later on, to him.

At least now I understood why his eyes did not smile when his lips did. The radiant smile never actually reached his eyes and it unsettled me. I wished to see him smile fully, undoubtedly, brilliantly. If there was anything I could do to help him overcome the curse, I would do it without thinking, but I just knew, there was no way around it. It was already a miracle he managed to delay it for so long, but it was impossible to break the curse of the bite, especially, the bite of the Lupin’s clan.

It was way after noon when Vince finally called for the last match end. He thanked us all and congratulated us for managing to show our all and whatnot. I was not paying attention to his words, only the voice. Only his voice interested me, it was calming, soothing, as gentle as a summer breeze, but could be heard far and clear like a thunder. I didn’t notice when I started to smile while he talked, good thing I had the mask on.

After the tournament ended, we were all let go to get some food into our bellies. I was not feeling hungry, so I thought of just going back to the base and catching some more sleep.

“Hey,” Vince walked right behind me and stopped me from deflecting from the herd. “Nice fight back there.” He tried for a smile. It did not travel to his eyes, again.

“Thanks. Wann thought I could have exposed myself.”

“Well… He’s kind of right.” He averted his eyes, scratching the back of his head while saying it which confused me.

“I know. Why do you look like you just insulted me and my whole family?”

“Um… Well. Because you don’t like Argent, and I just agreed with him.”

“You don’t need to feel guilty by pointing out the obvious.” I patted his head. It was a far reach so I just tugged him down. “I mean, I don’t like him pointing those things out to me, but it’s fine to agree with him. He’s not always not right, you know.”

At this, he just laughed. My ears filled with a radiant, echoing sound, making my heart squeeze and fill up with something warm and unpleasant, but at the same time, so wonderful I did not want him to stop laughing.

“Fey?” he stopped to look back at me. “Something’s wrong? You stopped walking.”

I lingered on his face, trying to etch the sound to my memory, and then shook my head.

“Nothing. I’m just tired.”

“Well then, get some food, hear the results, and then you’ll have some free time to do whatever.”

“Okay.” I thought, if getting food and waiting for the results meant spending some more time with him, I didn’t mind postponing sleep for some more.

He slung an arm over me and started gushing on how awesome my move was and how I should totally teach him how to do it. In turn, I said he’d break because he’s so skinny. He jabbed me into ribs and called it payback. I felt genuinely happy bickering like that with him.

I felt a completely different person when I was with him. I forgot about the urge to rip everything apart, to destroy things, I just wanted to be there with him talking nonsense and spending time without a care in the world. Despite the fact, there was a whole storm brewing in the background. It was a bliss to forget all of it, if just for a brief moment. I was finally seeing some meaning into my own existence, and it was so I could meet him. So I could know him as a person and love him with my whole being. Because that’s what I felt being with him.

All those times before Vince, with the others, it was love that held me together. Love for the one, the person who was meant to be with me, the one who granted me humanity, held me together and showed me the world through their eyes – it was beautiful, magnificent, full of wonder and life. Love made me human, and only with him could I feel that way once more.

The dining hall was already packed when me and Vince came in. The rest of our team had grabbed a table furthest from the entrance and closest to the open fire burning brightly in the fireplace made from round stones, the back had a bit of a wall to shield the fragile wooden material of the temporary construction from the fire.

It was strange to even begin to assume that they did it for me since I hated cold, and they knew it because I wouldn't shut up about it. I almost wanted to smile, but I held it in, contained it and then wiped it off completely.

Wann had Miller sitting on his lap. In front of everyone in the hall, they were sitting like two lovers and cooing one another. Although, Miller was trying to avoid meeting anyone’s eyes, shifting, fidgeting in his place. We got our food trays and made to join them, however much I did not want to. Vince became quiet all of a sudden and it seemed he was trying not to look Wann’s way.

“Why don’t you stop this bullshit?” I snarled.

“Oh, look, the lovebirds finally decided to join us,” Wann grinned and brushed his fingers on Miller’s cheek.

Vince thought it was the best time to be loud again as he spat out his juice with a horrible coughing following it. To say the least, I was confused as to why the sentence drew out the reaction that it did. It wasn’t really a lie, even though I knew Vince was attracted to males, more so than to females. I loved him, and I didn’t really see why it was such a bad thing.

“Argent, seriously, would you stop?” Dark hissed. “Let Castor go already. You’re making us all uncomfortable.”

Wann just laughed and grabbed Miller’s butt roughly eliciting a slight whine from the other man. I haven’t noticed it before, but when I focused on Miller, it was clear he was flustered and not in the exciting sort of way. Wann was forcing him.

“You’re repeating the same bad thing you did before,” I reprimanded as I leveled him with a glare, reminding him of the incident in our room with a boy named Tai.

Wann noticeably stiffened and shoved Miller off his lap. The guy faltered and fell to his knees. Vince helped him up and they both left the hall. I watched as both of them were walking away, Miller slightly trembling, and I could hear Vince soothing him and calling Wann an idiot who doesn’t think about anything or anyone but himself.

“Not cool,” was all that Rodd said and picked his half-finished tray to return it to the used dished area.

Dark awkwardly finished her tea and evacuated soon after. That left the two of us glaring at each other, daring to start the fight that was approaching, it just needed a little nudge and the dam would break and we would start the battle of the century. But nothing happened. He kept looking at me, daring me to start, but I had nothing more to say to the matter as it was. It was a shit move to act this way, but that’s what he did most of the time. He was a complete and utter dick to everyone, and I mean it quite literally.

“Ahem,” the rough old man’s voice sounded through speakers in the dining hall. Albrecht had the results of the tournament or whatever it was. “Ich bin fery happy to give out today’s results.”

He started off slowly, once again thanking everyone, and some other unnecessary blabber. He gave us the results only after maybe thirty minutes of his monologue, everyone had some time to return to their tables. However, Vince and Miller did not come back.